Unraveling of Avery Snow, The (10 page)

Chapter Sixteen

Change

Change can be a good thing when you’re ready. Not when you’re rushed and it’s forced. Then change is
like pressure that builds until you make a decision. You make that choice because you have to. Not because you wanted to make it.

That was how I felt all day about my decision to move in with Dallas. All day long my head played tricks on me. One hour I wa
s set to call him and tell him yes and the next I talked myself out of it. I pretty much did that the entire week. I was being a coward. I avoided any long conversations with him on the phone. I kept it short and sweet. I even canceled drinks with Ianni and Beau for now. I hated letting Ianni down, but after what Dallas put me through yesterday, I knew it was best to spend time thinking. I didn’t want to make a rash decision only to see it end our relationship.

By the end of the week I had dr
iven myself completely crazy about it. I ended the week by staying focused on Kerri’s party, which was a day away. We were driving her down to Laguna, telling her it was just a beach day. She had no idea about the party.

I was feeling better but my new car wasn’t. I had to get a rental until they fixed mine. The accident played
through my head all the time. The sound of screeching tires and crashing glass took over my thoughts daily. I wasn’t ready for another attack. I hoped she would back off now that she knew John and Amanda were searching for her.

“So you’re not going to talk to Dallas about it?”
Ianni asked as we packed the rental car with all of our bags. She didn’t offer any advice really. All she said to me was it was a good idea to keep me safe. She wanted the best for me as well. She always did.

“I don’t plan on bringing it up until after the weekend,” I said as I slammed my trunk. “It’s not that I don’t want to move our relationship to new levels, I just think this is a huge leap.”
Nodding, she grabbed her bag of pretzels and got in the car.

“Well, if you ask me
, it will bring you closer to Landon.” We both turned and in my back seat sat Lillith, her wings drawn close to her body so she could fit. She wore a huge smile for Ianni and they hugged. I got a nod and that was it.

“I don’t think that will help anything,
Lillith,” I told her as I started the car. Being surprised by angels was not a big deal to me anymore. They were a normal thing in my life now.

“Of course it will. You can get to know him better,” she offered. I knew Landon well enough for this life. “You don’t really know why you deny him of love in this life
, do you?”

“
Lillith don’t,” Ianni warned. I looked into the rearview mirror, now curious. She smiled at me like she knew I was interested.

“All I know is that my soul chose to live without him in every life
, Lillith. I chose to lead a different life. One that didn’t involve his soul. That’s enough for me,” I said as we pulled onto Kerri’s street. “Besides, I chose Dallas this time.” She laughed loudly and I pulled the car to a stop. I glared at her as she laughed and Ianni put her head on the window. She knew something; she knew what Lillith was talking about. I felt like a complete ass, like all that I knew wasn’t the truth. Really I never remember actually saying that I wanted to move on without his soul. I just remember making the choice to live again after each death. I only knew what Ianni had told me. She told me I wanted to love a different soul.

“Maybe you and your new Spirit Guide should talk more about that.
See you all later,” Lillith said as she disappeared. Maybe she was only causing her usual drama. I didn’t know for sure. Instead of pestering Ianni for answers I would ask Amanda for myself.

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

Getting Kerri pumped for a beach day was no big deal. That girl tanned constant
ly and she loved the sun. I didn’t care for it so much. I burned terribly if I didn’t slather on the sunblock. I was anxious to get back to the beach though. Landon had been right; I could live on the beach. The salty air made me feel at home, although I could live without the tan.

Kerri
had no clue that we were surprising her until that evening. It all worked out so well. We spent the day at the beach, had lunch on the cliffs, and at night got dressed to go out. Kerri thought we were just going for drinks. When we arrived at Bash she knew something was up. Bash wasn’t your typical bar; it was something more than that. It was where the party was at on the West Coast. Stars had been photographed here and lots of Hollywood events took place here as well. When we arrived Kerri seemed anxious, but once we got in and she saw the place she relaxed. It was relatively calm in the bar area. When you got to the dance floor things were louder. Music blared and people danced.

We walked into our private party room where she was greeted by Astrid and her mother. She screamed and jumped up and down. She was totally surprised and excited to see Astrid. Astrid
, a tall blonde who could knock you down by her looks, was a total sweetheart. She hugged me instantly and thanked me for keeping her in the loop. She was a nice girl and I couldn’t help but think that Landon would like her. Maybe he would hit on her at the wedding.

Ugh no
. I had to think of something else besides Landon. I got us a round of drinks and Kerri’s other friends came bearing gifts for her to open. We sat and talked as she opened scantily clad lingerie and giggled. Her mom, who was being very nice to me, even laughed at times.

Sue, Justin’s mom
, came late claiming she got lost. Which was easy to do if you didn’t know your way around Laguna. We all drank, danced, and let loose. The truth was I would miss doing this with Kerri. While I was more than happy to see her settle down with someone who loved her, I would miss these times.

She came over and hugged me tightly. “Thank you for all of this. You’re the best friend a girl could ask for.” I hugged her back. Friends were definitely a must have in life. What would we do if we didn’t have them?

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The next morning we felt the night before, all of us. My head pounded and Kerri moaned. Ianni slept on the bathroom floor, having drank way too much. It was her first official hangover. We had to celebrate that. Once we woke her we went to breakfast.

“Last night was fabulous,”
Ianni said while sipping her third cup of coffee. “I have never had so much fun, ever!”

“Welcome to the world of partying. I am officially done with that scene so it’s all yours,” Kerri said while eating her weight in eggs and bacon. “I will miss it
, though.”

I wouldn’t know what to miss. Yeah
, Kerri and I would go to La Costa for drinks, but we never partied like last night. While I would miss girl’s nights out, I would not miss hangovers like this one.

My cell phone buzzed on the table and I knew exactly who it was. I stepped outside to take Dallas’ call.

“Hey stranger, how is Laguna?” he asked.

“Beautiful, but we drank way too much last night.” I could hear loud noises on the other line. “Where are you?”

“Work. I am in the kitchen. We have another food critic coming in tonight so Sarah and I are trying to come up with the best ideas,” he spoke to her for a moment, then came back to me. “So I wanted to see if you thought about my offer.”

Crap! I had actually forgotten about it. I hadn’t made a decision at the moment.

“I am still thinking about it,” I told him.

“Avery
, I only want what’s best for you. Sarah and I will be leaving for New York next week and I would feel better if you were in my house while I am gone. Just until I get back, then you can make your final choice.” Sarah and him! This was the first I was hearing about his chef going with him to New York.

“I didn’t know she was coming with you,” I said nonchalantly. I didn’t want to be the jealous girlfriend. I
hadn’t met this girl and he talked about her all the time. She could be some beautiful threat to my relationship. So I did what any insecure girlfriend would do. “Okay, I will stay with you next week, until you get back, then we can make long term decisions.” He laughed into the line at my comment.

“Princess, it’s not a permanent thing. Not unless you want it to be. I want to keep you safe. I can’t do that if you’re not with me.”

What he said was true, but he wouldn’t be with me all the time. He would be in New York with Sarah instead. I swallowed that nasty remark and instead said my nicest one, “Thanks, babe. I know you’re trying to look out for me. I have to get back to the girls.”

“Okay
, love you lots,” he said as we hung up.

“Love you
, too.” But he hung up before he heard me say it.

Some changes can be good. Others change before
you’re ready for them to. I wasn’t ready for Dallas to change, but it was occurring whether I wanted it to or not. The fact was Dallas was different than when we first started dating.

Chapter Seventeen

Black Ink

I went back in to meet the girls and I immediately asked Ianni what Sarah was like.

“She’s
elusive,” she said as she attempted to eat dry toast.

“
Elusive? What does that mean?” Kerri asked. I wanted to know as well. I took a sip of coffee and braced for the answer. Elusive could mean her beauty was unreal.

“It’s hard
to even talk to her or really get to know her. To be honest I have only seen her through the kitchen.” She set her toast down. “She talks to no one. Only Dallas. She barks orders and that’s it. Beau says she’s a real snob.” Great. Okay, so she isn’t nice to others, but nice to Dallas. Was this good or bad? I wasn’t sure.

“Hey
, how is the Beau thing going anyway?” Kerri asked her. They changed the subject and I still had no idea what this woman was like, at all.




  
The drive home was quiet because they both slept. I was alone with my thoughts as the music played on the radio. Mostly I thought about my past lives with Landon. I couldn’t keep my thoughts on Dallas. It was hard to think about him when I was so unsure of what to think. So I focused on Lillith’s comment. What if I never wanted to be without him? What if I always wanted him and Ianni didn’t want me to be with him. Ianni would never lie to me, not about that, but there was something she wasn’t telling me. I had to try to find out the reason why I wanted to live without Henry’s soul. Why I chose to come back to Earth time and time again. Why I was here now, instead of with Adam at Home. I had died such a terrible death as Elsie. The cancer had been hard on Adam. Why hadn’t I stayed behind at Home and given him the wife he needed? Not the wife that constantly left him.

We pulled into Kerri’s and dropped her off. Justin waved from the doorway as she jumped into his arms. Did I have a relationship like that with Dallas? I thought I did, but lately it seemed that things were becoming confusing. We were starting to unravel a little. I didn’t know how to fix it.

“What’s on your mind?” Ianni asked me. I noticed I was chewing my fingernails. I stopped and looked her way.

“Things I guess.”

“Moving in with Dallas?” she asked. I nodded and she pulled her legs up to her chest.

“I don’t know a lot about this sort of thing, but what I do know is to go with your heart. You know, maybe if this isn’t what you want—”

“No, it’s what he wants. So he can keep me safe,” I interrupted. “Because he knows about Sarafe. He is only doing this because he is trying to be a good boyfriend. I don’t think he thought of doing this before my accident,” I admitted to her, and to myself as well. It was a true statement. He never mentioned this before. Not even when we talked about our future.

“You can
’t think like that, Avery. He loves you.” She was right; he did love me. I knew that. Even though our arguments had increased lately, we still had passion for each other.

“I am just nervous
, that’s all. It’s a huge step for me. I mean, he is my first love,” I said as we pulled into our parking garage. “I just don’t want to mess it up.”

She placed her warm hand on mine. I knew she was trying to tell me to calm
down and stop being such a spaz.

We got out and walked towards the lobby when she stopped and grabbed me. Throwing me behind her she took a defensive stance. I looked around and saw nothing. I didn’t know what the hell she was doing.

     “Don’t move,” she whispered. “She’s here.” Chills ran through me. I was frozen still and couldn’t move. I was too afraid to. How did she know Sarafe was here?

    
“Ianni, you are such a good friend, shielding her like that,” a thick voice said from the shadows of the garage. “But you know that you have no powers and you can’t do anything to defend her.”

    
Ianni stood straighter and pulled her hair into a knot. “Just try it bitch. I may not be an angel anymore, but I can still kick your ass.” Holy crap, my pure little Ianni was a tough chick. I silently gave three cheers for my friend.

“Oh big words for such a
puny little human,” Sarafe said. She still stood in the shadows, and now I was angry. I came around Ianni; no more hiding. I could take her, too. Two against one.

“Come out of your hiding spot and face us,” I yelled.

“Nope, not going to give you the honor of seeing my face. For now I will leave you both with a warning.” Her voice had the hint of a Middle Eastern descent, though I couldn’t tell for sure. I hated not knowing what she looked like.

“Oh yeah
? What’s your warning?” Ianni asked with venom.

“You better tell that Watcher to back off before he gets hurt. My
kind does not like being followed by things like him. So if you want to keep Avery safe, make him back off,” she spat.

“You back off of Avery
, how about that?” Ianni offered. “And he won’t be following you.”

“Sweet
Ianni, you know I can’t do that. But I can take someone she loves instead of her.” I had heard enough. My feet were walking towards her before it registered to my brain what I was doing. I was planning on wringing her neck. Before I got to her she flew up and away into the night sky. All I saw of her was hair like black ink and tan skin.

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The first phone call I made was to Dallas, who didn’t answer. My message to him was a basic, “Okay, you win. I will move in.” The second call was to my father. He picked up. I didn’t tell him all the details of what happened
, I just wanted to hear his voice. I had avoided my father and hadn’t been a very loving daughter. I had been so wrapped up in my relationship that I had neglected him. When death stares you in the face, you start to think about the people you have in your life. My father may have missed a great portion of my life, but he was here now.

“I promise to meet you for breakfast tomorrow, Dad,” I told him. He had been giving me a hard time about not going to breakfast with him. During the winter it had become tradition. Now that he lived closer, we should be doing more things together.
To be honest, I missed my dad. It was time to mend the broken relationships for good. I didn’t know how much time I had with these people. Life could be shorter for me than I thought, considering Sarafe was trying to kill me.

“See you in the morning
, kiddo,” he said.

I snuggled in bed with May and
Ianni beside me. We were both frightened beyond belief. She snored lightly and I was happy she found sleep. I didn’t want to sleep with Sarafe knowing where I was. I lay down and stared at the screen of my phone wishing for a call from Dallas. I needed him right now. More than he could possibly know. Maybe I should have told him what happened in the message. I thought he would notice the tone of my voice and hurry over. I closed my eyes, quietly envisioning how it would go. He would rush over, knock the door down, and pull me into his arms. Call me his darling princess and shield me from the attacks of any violent dark evil forces.

“Come to me and let me hold you,” Landon said as he reached out for me, his tan arms enveloping me in the strongest, most comforting hug I have ever experienced. I rested my face near his heart and felt the strumming of it against my cheek, its beautiful rhythm soothing my fear.

“No one will hurt you if you stay here in my arms with me, I promise.”
He bent down and lifted my chin, pulling me towards him. His lips meeting mine in an explosion of kisses that started slow and turned frantic. Wanting him more and more, I pulled him towards me, hoping to reach into his soul. My fingers splayed into his hair as he lifted me towards his bed. As he lay me down, he pulled off his shirt and tossed it to the floor, revealing his body in all its glory. I licked my lips in desperation. I needed his kiss; I needed him. No one else but him.

As he grabbed my hair gently he massaged it and kissed my cheek. He slowly moved towards my neck
, sending a wave of heat through my body.

“I love you, Landon,” I said in his ear. “I have always loved you.”

My confession freed me. I had been carrying the burden of the truth for so long, careful not to hurt anyone with my words and deception.

“Avery,
my love for you never ended. It has lasted lifetimes.” As he met my eyes tears pooled in them. “Don’t cry,” he whispered as he kissed me. “I will love you in every life. That is a promise you made me make. I do not go back on my promises.”