UNSHAKABLE (Able Series Book 4) (31 page)

“I know, but I just miss her terribly and worry about Dad more than ever now. Who’s going to take care of him, especially when we leave? I feel that by my leaving, I’m failing him.”

Damien blows out a breath and releases his hold on me. “All I know is that your dad wants you to live your life the way you want to live it. If you want to stay here, that’s what we’ll do, but if you want to leave we’ll do that, too. So it’s up to you, babe. I go where you go.”

“You won’t miss this life? I mean, doing the job you love?”

“There’s nothing and no one in my eyes that I could love more than you. You will always come first, Sophia, always. I thought I could balance both. My love for you and my love for my job.” He pauses and leans forward with his head down, his forearm resting on his knees. “I’ve done what I’ve always wanted for so long, and it’s about time to spend every minute of my life being with you without my time being controlled by my job. All of our fighting because of stuff I couldn’t tell you grates at me. I don’t want that division anymore. I don’t want to have to pick between you and my job. I won’t have it, Sophia.” He turns and buries his face securely on my neck as he breathes out loudly. “I’ve waited for you for so long, even begged God for a gift such as you, and giving only half of me isn’t an option anymore. You’re not sharing me with anyone or anything for even a second. I’m your shield full-time. I’ll always be behind. . . .”

I shake my head in interruption. “You’ll never be behind me, not anymore. You, my dear husband, will always be beside me. Always.”

He pulls back and gives me his flirtatious smile. “I’ll be beside, in front, behind, on top of you. Wherever you want me, I’m there because it’s where I want to be, where I know I should be.” He stands and carries me toward our room. “And right about now . . .” He kisses me then whispers, “I want to be inside you.”

He lays me down on the bed, performs a mini striptease show for my enjoyment, and takes off every article of clothing covering my body painstakingly slow. The moment his lips touch mine an explosion of warmth and all that’s good comes from him fills me up, sending shockwaves of pleasure throughout my entire body.

Moans turn into sighs of contentment as his mouth worships my body and his hardness moves inside of me. Every kiss is made to entice, every bite made to mark, every lick made to tease, and every powerful thrust made to send me to the edge of bliss where his body meets mine and our souls intertwine.

Loss
—a painful emotion no one deserves to feel but no one can escape from. Losing my mother is the most painful one yet, and seeing the look on my dad’s face each and every day is a reminder of that loss. I hurt for him more than I hurt for myself.

Failure
—not once do I blame anyone for my mom’s death other than those involved in its completion. Damien calls it their failure, but for me it’s what’s meant to happen. Maybe it’s the failure in accepting her loss that makes it harder to move on. Maybe I’m failing my mom by constantly living in pain.

Gain
—as I ponder what this life has given me, two things come to mind. One, Damien’s love is what I’ve gained through all of this. It’s his love I’m afraid to lose, one I know I couldn’t live without. Secondly, it’s the blessing of life growing inside me. Our baby has given us hope and happiness amidst the sorrow of my mother’s death.

SOPHIA

AFTER EIGHTEEN MONTHS OF SLEEPLESS
nights, travelling from one state to another, and staying in a cramped Presidential bus all the while caring for someone else, the day is finally here. It’s bittersweet that mom isn’t here to celebrate this moment with us, but life goes on. Celebrating it with my husband beside me and my dad’s ‘new love’ is liberating and fills me with a new sense of purpose. A ‘new love’ as my dad puts it in exchange for an everlasting love that death can’t even extinguish.

Out of sheer pride and determination, my dad pushes his plan to walk down Pennsylvania Avenue toward the White House instead of riding in the beast. Of course there are frowning faces from his Secret Service detail as well as Joe and Ms. Viv.

Dad and I rarely talk about what happened. He only told me once about how he blames himself for allowing a snake, Nicole, to get near Mom and me. How he regrets trusting someone only for that person to fail him. As I look at my dad, I feel a sense of justice. Not because Nicole died and Harrison and his accomplices are rotting in jail, but because through it all we survived. Though we lost Mom, her legacy lives with us.

“I’ll walk with you, Dad,” I whisper against his ear.

He frowns then shakes his head. “Not a chance, sweetheart. Stay inside the beast with my new love and Anna, okay?”

“Hold this please,” I say handing him my gloves while I fix his tie. “Mom isn’t here, so I’ll walk with you. We did it with mom the first time, and I won’t let you do it by yourself this time, Mr. President.” My eyes never leave his as he accepts the choice I just made.

“Don’t you think you should discuss that with your husband?”

I’m determined. This time it’s my way or the highway. I’m doing this for my dad—for my mom, but I’m making this decision for me. Finally, a decision made solely by me.

I turn to look for said husband only to find him talking to Luke and Tony, his head bobbing in agreement with what Tony is telling him. I’m sure he’s triple checking that everyone is in place to ensure mine and dad’s safety, plus dad’s new love for the duration of the inauguration. As we’re being carted toward the limo, Damien walks toward me giving me his sexy grin that’s exclusive to me.

“You warm enough?” He asks.

“Mmmhmmm.” Still trying to figure out the best possible way to tell him that I’m walking with my dad.

Once everyone is inside the beast, Dad nods at me in encouragement to tell Damien. “I’m going to walk with Dad, okay?” I say confidently, proud that my voice isn’t shaking.

Damien narrows his eyes and swings his gaze to my dad then back at me. He licks his lips and looks out the window, his jaw ticks once then twice then faces me. “I don’t think that’s a good idea, Sophia. I don’t want to risk. . . .” He stops, seemingly astonished by what he sees on my face.

Determination, that’s what he sees.

An understanding passes between him and me. He now gets the need for me to stand next to my dad because of the absence of my mom. It’s an absence that we still feel to this day, especially today.

“Okay, but I’ll walk behind you. No, ifs, ands, or buts. Not bending on this one, babe.”

I shake my head. “Beside me. I need you beside me.”

He reaches for my hand and folds it with his as my gaze turns toward my father who appears to know the look Damien and I just shared. It’s the same look he used to share with Mom. A tinge of ache clouds his eyes and thuds loud and clear in my heart. When his gaze stops on his new love, my heart soars for him. As we approach the point where we’re to walk, Damien’s hold on me tightens as his agitation over my safety comes to the forefront. Even though he’s not in the agency anymore, his trusted Sig Sauer is nestled safely on his side,
just in case
, so he tells me.

The motorcade stops and an agent opens my dad’s door as he winks at me. He exits waving to the crowd while I follow doing the same with my shield beside me. He seems uncomfortable standing on the opposite side of it all where he’s the one being watched as opposed to doing the watching. I wouldn’t put it past him to be looking for anything lurking in the distance.

Waving, I ask, “How are you holding up?”

“I’m good.”

I look at him as I continue to wave. “You have to wave back, babe.” I tease. “Come on, you have to do it. Smile, you’re on candid camera.”

“Sophia.” His serious low tone only reserved for when he wants me to stop makes an appearance, but I’m one to push the envelope.

“Show them a little bit of teeth, maybe your sexy grin. Oh wait, that’s only for me in the bedroom. You know that thing you did last night when you kissed me . . . then you licked my . . .”

I think my fingers are crushed to bits when my lovely husband gives my hand a squeeze. Even through my gloves, I feel his strength. “Stop. You’re gonna get a serious spanking tonight, Mrs. Williams. Maybe I won’t let you come, or let my tongue do the talking. Maybe I won’t lick . . .” He stops, then grins my way.

The jerk actually grins at me then smiles his panty melting smile to whomever as he waves. “Continue talking to Roxy, let’s see what happens.”

I smirk him. “Hmm, I think BOB will come out of retirement.”

“I can withhold, baby. You’ll lose every time. Wanna shake on it?”

We do. A silent shake sealing our bet, then just as quickly I want to retract it knowing I won’t last because my husband’s determination is made of steel—solid and unshakable. When it comes to my own determination it holds nothing against his because my husband is my kryptonite. I’m a miserable puddle of goop on the floor once he smiles or even looks at me. Life isn’t fair even if you’re the President’s daughter.

Pomp
—another four years of this. I promised myself I would help Dad the best way I could, but leaving D.C. is something I need to do. I want a simple life away from this circus, and staying in D.C. is never simple. Nothing in D.C. is simple. Plus, I don’t want to subject Dad’s new love to all the pomp surrounding this city.

Circumstance
—I’m in the same situation as four years ago. But this time, I won’t let my dad’s job dictate how I live my life or where I should be. Though Luke and the whole gang will be watching me twenty-four seven, I’m creating my own kind of circumstance. A circumstance my mom would be proud of. A circumstance by shield deserves to have.

DAMIEN

After the inauguration festivities, Sophia, my mom, and I plus the President’s ‘new love’ board a private jet to our newly built home in Montecito overlooking the Pacific Ocean.

“She’s fine, Damien. Quit checking every ten seconds.”

I glare at my wife. “You don’t have any right to nag me. You kept my gift from me for a couple of days, babe. That’s unforgivable.”

She rolls her eyes at me. “Please, when are you going to stop using that against me?”

I look out of the small window escaping her gaze as I remember that day when my heart doubled in size, and my already perfect world turned even more flawless—unblemished.

“Sophia, what do you want to do today?”

My wife stops stirring her bowl of oatmeal. “Hmm, I don’t know. What do you think?” She tucks her hair behind her ears then continues her stirring.

“Hold that thought, baby.” I raise my index finger when I hear my cell ring.

I run from the kitchen to our bedroom to retrieve it. I grab my phone, but it slips out of my fingers and lands on the floor, tumbling under the bed. As I crouch down to reach for it, my fingers hit something. I grab it pulling it from under the bed then realizing it has my name on it makes my heart pump in expectation. A red bow is tied around it with a few dust bunnies since it’s our first time home after Amanda’s death. I pull the ribbon, pop open the box, and my heart drops on the floor with a loud thud. I gaze toward the kitchen and then back at the box. Snapping it shut, I stand and walk purposefully back to my wife.

I clear my throat making her jump. “So, I found something.”

She turns my way then I drop the box with a loud thud on the table. Her eyes move from me and land on the box.

“Oh, you found it!”

“I sure did. Thank you.”

“I wanted to make it special for you. I really did.” She shrugs her shoulders as tears threaten to spill again.

“I know, baby. I understand. No more crying, okay? I appreciate the thought you put into it, but what’s important isn’t the grand gesture but the life growing inside you. That’s what’s important.”

“Okay.”

“Oh by the way, Tami’s pregnant, too. Brian called me last night. I just didn’t want to wake you,” I tell her to change the direction of our conversation.

“Why didn’t you wake me? Ugh!”

“Don’t tell me you’re upset. Is this the crazy hormones talking?”

Sophia’s eyes bulge. “Are you making fun of me?”

I stare at her with a deadpan look on my face. I remember how crazy the girls were acting while pregnant. The same fear that crossed Jake and Cody’s eyes, I’m sure is the same thing Brian and I will be experiencing.

She stops and holds her tummy and my eyes automatically gravitate toward my baby.

“You’re acting like a baby,” I joke.

“Don’t talk to me,” she mumbles with the conviction in her voice all but gone.

“Noted!” I answer back with a grin on my face the same way I used to.

She walks, taking my baby away from me instead of saying anything at all. And what do I do? I follow them because I need to . . . I need them.

Loud wails snap me out of my reverie while my arms instantly reach out for my daughter.

My daughter, Abigail Noelle Williams, and as Cody calls her, my little root beer. I swear my sister’s love for acronyms rubbed off on Cody. I think I like The President’s name for my daughter better, ‘new love’. Since she was born, the sadness isn’t as consuming in my father-in-laws eyes as it had been these past couple of months.