Until Next Time (23 page)

Quinn held out his hand, suddenly very interested in learning more about Mitch. “Macy Quinn Oliver,” Quinn said, his voice as cool as he could make it. “I’m Piper’s boyfriend.”

Piper didn’t flinch or react. Mitch’s eyes however, got as big as quarters.

“Ah, well.” Mitch wriggled his hand from Quinn’s. “Mitch Dawson, director of the Seventy-fifth Annual Convention and Expo of the North American Funeral Directors Association. Nice to meet you. Piper and I have a long history.”

Quinn didn’t miss the tone in the word
long.
Yet Piper looked cool as a cucumber. She smiled at them both, either not noticing or not caring, about the strain Quinn was trying to keep from his expression. Maybe he was succeeding.

“Let me get you checked in quickly, shall I?” Mitch asked, finally focusing his attention away from Piper’s face.

“That’s would be wonderful. Thank you,” Piper replied, stepping back to stand next to Quinn.

Quinn said nothing as Mitch hustled to the front desk, speaking quickly to the brunette behind the counter. Piper kept her gaze trained on the fish zigging back and forth in the tank. There was history there, all right, Quinn thought. He wondered how many more people he would meet over the next week who had
history
with Piper. People who knew the
real
Piper. He was
not
prepared for that.

A clawing envy, something Quinn had never felt, scratched deep in the pit of his gut and nearly had him gritting his teeth when Mitch strolled back over, a grin on his tanned face. He held up a small white envelope to Piper.

“Suite fifteen-twenty,” Mitch said, dropping the package in her hand. His eyes flicked quickly to Quinn then back to Piper. “You two get settled in. The fun starts first thing in the morning. We’ll have the bellboy bring up your bags.”

“Thank you, Mitch,” Piper said, still beaming.

Quinn wasn’t blind. He noticed that Piper’s smile to Mitch wasn’t the same smile she gave him. Her eyes flickered, shining with a strange warmth. Her body was relaxed and less stiff than Quinn had seen her in quite some time. She was comfortable with this Mitch guy. Too comfortable if you asked Quinn.

With growing curiosity, Quinn silently followed Piper through the winding lobby to the elevator. Piper was stopped a total of three times before they even made it twenty steps. And each time a stranger rushed up to her, Quinn couldn’t help but feel a growing anger with how easily Piper let these people in. She hugged them,
really
hugged them. Her eyes stayed focused, and her voice was chipper and excited, like she was actually happy to see them. In less than twenty minutes, her funeral director guard was completely gone and she looked happy around these people. It confused him.

Quinn smiled and made small talk when necessary as he was introduced to strangers whose names he couldn’t have cared less about. Because the whole time he kept a keen eye on Piper. And he couldn’t help but tense his jaw in response to the way she was so…compassionate with these people. How long had it taken him to get her to be this relaxed around him? And now that he saw her
this
relaxed, he suddenly realized that Piper had never truly been totally at ease around him.

The conference hadn’t even officially started and Quinn was already doubting how well he’d be able to handle Piper in this environment—with people who shared her passion and commitment to those who had departed. She had common ground with them. And it showed with each glimmer in her eye and wave of her hand to the people passing by as they finally took their remaining steps to the elevator. Was this what she had with Gavin?

How was he going to survive this week? He needed Piper to be like this with him. Hell, he thought she was giving him her everything until he’d seen…
this.
And he still couldn’t scrap the image of Mitch arms wound around her back like an octopus. Shaking his head, he rushed out of the elevator as soon as it dinged and the doors swished opened.

“Are you all right?” Piper asked.

“No.” Okay, he got that word out through his clenched teeth, but he had no idea what else to say.

Her hand flew to his forehead. Quinn closed his eyes.

“You’re not hot.” Her voice was low, and a little too close to his ear.

“I’m not sick, Piper.” Rubbing his face, he finally looked her in the eyes. “We need to talk.”

Her lips curled downward as she keyed into their room. The luggage was neatly stacked by the door. Quinn’s eyes swept through the space. Cream walls, dark patterned carpet, and two beds with fluffy white covers and black accent pillows. The curtains were drawn, but he imagined the view was amazing. At the moment, though, he only wanted to focus on Piper.

“Can we sit?” he asked, waving a hand toward the gray couch in the corner.

Her expression tightened, but she sat, legs crossed, arms folded around her chest. “Is something wrong?”

He tried to choose he next words carefully, not wanting to upset Piper, not wanting to further fuel his unease with her answer. But his mouth could only blurt one thing. “Have you slept with Mitch?”

<<<<>>>>>

His question made her rock back on the couch in shock. She could admit to having had some issues about this upcoming week. The most recent being the terrible dream she’d had about losing him on the plane ride here. The agony of his death had been all-too-real in her mind, yet when she’d opened her eyes she only saw his—calm and caring—looking at her like she was the only woman on earth. She couldn’t take it. They were getting too close. She was feeling way too much. So now his question, completely out of left field, gave her the perfect chance.

“Is that your business?”

He cast his eyes away, but Piper didn’t miss the sting of pain. It hurt her in places she didn’t want to admit.

“No.” His voice was deathly cool. “I thought it would be nice to know if I would be meeting any past
companions
of yours while on this little trip, Piper. You seem pretty friendly with everyone.”

Her own anger flared despite being touched that he was actually jealous. “Companions?” She jumped from the couch. “What do I look like, Quinn? A twenty-four hour bed-mart ready to have sex with any man who agrees not to get attached?”

He stood then, eyes clouded with hurt. He towered over her. “I didn’t mean that, Piper. I would never think that way about you. You’re just…different here. We’ve been off the plane less than twenty minutes and I feel like you really
know
these people. Mitch, especially. After it took me so long to even crack through your shell, it surprises me, that’s all.”

Her eyes watered from being open so wide. “For your information, Mitch is gay. He happens to be one of my oldest and dearest friends.”

“You told me you didn’t have any friends. They were too much work, remember?”

“This is different.”

“How?” His voice stayed composed, despite her higher octave.

“It just
is.
I don’t have to explain everything to you, Quinn.” She jerked her luggage up from the floor and unceremoniously dumped it on the bed. “Also, every other person I’ve talked to thus far, including any more that I will be talking to over the next several days, are only business acquaintances.” She huffed an irritated breath. “And for the record, I’ve never,
ever,
mixed business with pleasure. The few times I tried I stopped before anything could ever get started.” Spinning, she noticed he was right behind her. She jabbed his chest. “The only exception has been you.” Winded, she collapsed to the bed.

She stared up at him as his hand rubbed across the spot on his chest she’d poked. His eyes were still darkened with pain. She didn’t want to hurt him. She didn’t want to see him upset. She only wanted to…to…

What?

Fix what was wrong between them? Heck, figure out what was even wrong between them? Curl her arms around him and draw him close? Even with the lingering fear of his death from her stupid dream? He shouldn’t be asking about personal things. She only talked about personal things when
she
wanted to. She didn’t like having to defend herself, her friendships, or…holy smoly—her feelings. She was a mess. And she hated that Quinn was the only man that had ever affected her this way and had completely knocked her out of her comfort zone. And from the looks of Quinn’s strained expression, she was doing the same thing to him.

What had they done to reach other?

Her hands came up to her face. She was completely unprepared for all these feelings. All these doubts and questions. These were things she wasn’t supposed to have in a casual relationship.

“I’m sorry, Piper.” His voice settled her. His hands stroked down both her arms as he knelt. “I didn’t mean to…”

The sharp intake of his breath made her fling open her eyes. The uncertainty floating in his wounded gaze pulled at her. Deeply. Painfully.

“I’ve never felt like this before,” he continued. “And I don’t know what do with these feelings.”

He had feelings he didn’t understand, too? At least she wasn’t suffering alone. Not that that made her feel any better. She didn’t want either of them to be suffering. They should be focused on the physical aspect of their relationship and nothing else. There shouldn’t be anything else to worry about. No strings.

She groaned inwardly. They had strings. Lots and lots of strings. Over the past few weeks Quinn had wound himself in her life in a safe and shocking way. And because of that, Piper had tossed out a few her own strings around Quinn. And now the strings were getting tighter. More real. Exactly what she didn’t want.

“There’s nothing for you to be jealous of, Quinn.”

Brow furrowed, he drew his bottom lip into his mouth. “There is, Piper. And I didn’t realize it until recently. And it’s more than jealously. When Maddie died, I spent a great deal of time figuring out if I would ever want anyone else in my life. I knew from the start I would never marry again, but I needed to know if there could be something special with someone again. Someone to love.”

Cheese and crackers, she did not need to hear anymore. Her hand flew up. “Don’t. Please don’t.”

“Don’t what?”

Don’t tell me you love me because you’ll ruin everything. Tell me you want to go back to having fun and great sex. No emotions. No strings.

“You promised…” Was all she could say, voice shaking.

His grin was unsure. “I know what I promised you, Piper. And I’m going to keep that promise.”

Thank chocolate.

“But because I haven’t felt this way about anyone in a long time, I need to cope with certain things I’m not used to. Seeing you with other men—happy with them—is driving me nuts.”

“I told you—”

His fingers to her lips silenced her. “I know. But there’s history there. I can see it in your eyes. Along with all those other people you spoke with on the way up here. You are different with them, Piper. Free. And it hurt me because you told me aren’t like that with anyone. I want you to be like that with me.”

She eyed him carefully, digesting his words. Keeping her voice level, she tried her best to make him understand. “Quinn, these people deal with death daily. They know the pain of others. Many of them have felt immense pain themselves. We all shared a kindred connection that no one will understand. We can be open and
free
with each other because we know how cruel life is. How quickly the end can and does come. There are no pretenses with us. No years of learning about each other’s families or lives. All we have is
this.
Death, Quinn. We have death. And that makes us one.”

His Adam’s apple bobbed as he swallowed. “And Mitch?”

“Our history is a little more complicated. His father and my father were good friends. They almost went into business together until Mitch’s dad got sick.” She looked quickly up to the ceiling, willing the tears to stay away. “His dad died, then mine died, and we were there for each other, in the way that only morticians can be.”

“But…” His eyes searched her face. “You showed them all such compassion. That same compassion I’ve been telling you you’ve been missing from your life. The one you hide away—even from me.”

“It’s not compassion, Quinn.”

He frowned. “Then what is it?”

“Understanding. Acceptance.”

He drew in a slow breath through his nose. Did he get it?

“Piper, you have shown me different sides of you. I have seen firsthand the Business Piper and the Caring Piper.” His shoulder lifted. “I think there is more compassion to what you’re saying than you think. I thought I had all of what you had to offer and I don’t think I do. Now I want to see
that
Piper with me, too.”

“Oh.” She drew back, thoughts spinning. He wanted her to accept him? How? Understand him at a deeper level? Why? Her stomach dropped.

You would have to let your feelings for him be known.

Was that what he was asking? If it was, he was asking far too much.

Without seeming to nervous, she gave him a soft smile. “How about this. Why don’t you observe me around these people over the next several days and see if you don’t change your mind? You might come to the conclusion that we’re all mad, you know.”