Until Next Time (30 page)

With that thought, reality came crashing back. Her hand splayed across Gavin’s chest, gently pushing him back. “I can’t do this.”

When she had enough room, Piper skittered to the side, putting several feet between them. She didn’t dare look at him. She knew what she would see. She would see passion flaring in his eyes, and she didn’t want him to see the hollowness in hers. She belonged to someone else. She hadn’t been able to see it until that very moment. And she had no idea what to do with that realization. After long silent moments, she allowed her gaze to flick up.

Gavin regarded her carefully, swiping his hand over his bottom lip. “I’ve lost you, haven’t I?”

“You never had me, Gavin.”

A sad smile touched his lips. “I thought I’d still have a chance, though.”

She shook her head, stepping back again. “I’m sorry.”

“You let him in, didn’t you?”

“I didn’t really have a choice in the matter.”

At that, he chuckled. “That’s too bad—for me, that is. He’s a lucky man, Piper.”

“He was.” She twisted her hands together, trying to wring out the emotions flooding her. “I-I let him go.”

“I know.” Gavin’s dark gaze darted to her hands and back to her face. His expression became wistful. “I never thought I would say this, but you should fix it, then. No matter how we feel about our profession or what we think we should do in our personal lives, everyone has the right to be happy. The same goes for you.” He swung about and made his way to the door. “Goodbye, Piper. And good luck.”

Piper’s breath rushed out as the swinging door swished silently closed behind him. He was right. Piper had to face her demons head-on, or run from them the rest of her life. She was tired of running, tired of not being happy, tired of not being the girl she had been when she was younger. It was time for her to live life.

With renewed hope, she rushed up the stairs, running smack into Margo at the top.

“Whoa, Piper.” Margo’s hand shot out to help her balance. “Is there a fire?”

Piper smoothed a hand over her shirt. “Oh, heavens, no. It’s…nothing, really. I had something I wanted to do upstairs.”

“Can it wait a minute? Someone’s here to see you.”

Piper’s heart kicked up a notch, hoping it was Quinn. On cue, Margo stepped to the side, revealing Jessica standing next to her wheelchair-bound son in the foyer, grins splitting both their faces.

“Piper!” Jessica face was beaming, and her son was bouncing to and fro in his wheelchair, his leg wrapped from foot to hip in a bright red cast.

Before Piper could blink, Jessica had her wrapped in a hug. “It’s so good to see you!”

Piper did her best to put on her happy face as she drew away. “Yes, Jessica. How are things? Lenny looks good.”

“All thanks to you.” Another hug, this one tighter, warmer. A slice of regret speared through Piper. “Your help has been tremendous.”

She swiped at her eyes. “No. No, I was doing what I could.”

Jessica leveled a stare at her, still grinning. “It was more than that, Piper.”

That much was true. Piper had
cared
long before she realized it. Long before she admitted it. Long before Quinn had even seen it. And was she really tired of hiding it? Running from it?

She pressed her hand to her head. Yes. More than she could even explain.

“Did I catch you at a bad time?” Jessica asked, disrupting her thoughts. “Piper?”

“Oh, sorry. My mind has been running a bit in circles lately.”

“She and Quinn broke up,” Margo said, a hint of sadness to her normally upbeat tone.

“Oh.” Jessica hand flew to her lips. “I’m sorry. I didn’t know you two had gotten serious.”

Piper tried her best to smile. “It’s okay, you haven’t been around. You’ve been taking care of this little guy.” She ruffled Lenny’s hair, enjoying the giggle that bubbled out of him.

“And Gavin just left,” Margo added. “You haven’t met him, Jessica, but he has the hots for our girl, here.” She bumped Piper’s hip with her own.

Piper rolled her eyes. “Not anymore. I had to set him straight.”

“Is that why he left looking like a wounded puppy?”

“I imagine. His kiss wasn’t as well received as he hoped.”

Both girls gasped in unison.

“Don’t worry, I’m fine. He actually helped me put things into perspective.”

Margo clucked her tongue. “Did he? And how was that?”

“It’s complicated,” Piper answered weakly. She had some stuff to do before she could pour her heart out to Quinn. Important stuff. “But I’ll be fine, I promise you.”

Jessica smiled easily. “With you, Piper, I don’t doubt that a bit. We’ll get out of here and let you do what you need to do.”

“Oh no, you don’t have to leave—”

“It’s okay.” Jessica skated around to the back of Lenny’s wheelchair. “We were out for some fresh air anyway. That van you arranged for us is a lifesaver.”

“It was nothing.”

“If you say so. Ready to go, Lenny?” Jessica popped a little wheelie, and Lenny squealed in delight.

“Again! Again!” he said.

Jessica laughed, obviously happy despite the misfortune that could have been much worse. She was strong, even in her young age. Piper wished she had been that strong from the beginning.

“I think we’ll head to the park and stop by to see you another time,” Jessica said.

“Give me a hug before you leave,” Piper demanded playfully.

Jessica’s brow rose in confusion. Piper wasn’t one to outwardly display affection and actually mean it, and she knew both her employees knew that. But it was time to turn over a new leaf and toss the tattered one away.

After a quick hug and goodbyes, Piper left Margo to take care of the funeral home while she went up to her apartment to take care of her much needed business.

She crossed the threshold and made a beeline for her closet. She jerked open the door and stared down at the box that bore her name. The box of her things her father had kept. Steeling herself, she dragged it out and sat it on the coffee table. With a deep breath and prayer, she popped open the lid, ready to dive into the memories of her past. Ready to remember why her parents had loved her so. Ready to remember why
she
had loved them as much. It was time to tackle her emotions, her fears, her memories. Time to remember what it was like to be part of a family, and to remember the times when she hadn’t let fear run her life.

It was time to live.

Chapter Twenty-Five

Quinn ambled through his grandpa’s house, picking up boxes and getting them ready for storage. He didn’t know why Grandpa had decided to finally store some of his old knick-knacks, but the task was helping him keep his mind off of Piper.

“Is this the last room?” KC asked from the doorway to the library.

Quinn huffed as he hauled a box into his arms. “Yeah.” He glanced around the room, admiring his grandpa’s meticulously clean and organized shelves. Shelves that still looked full. Quinn noticed that all of his grandmother’s stuff was still perched lovingly around the room. “Even though we’ve been packing and storing all day, it still looks full, doesn’t it?”

KC strode into the room, hefting a box on his shoulder. “Yeah, I think he wanted to be able to see Grandma’s stuff better. Couldn’t do that with all that other stuff cluttering it up.”

A frown tugged at his lips. “Yeah. He must miss her like crazy.”

“Imagine living with the same woman for over half a century and then waking up alone.”

Quinn hadn’t lived with Maddie at all and the pain of her death still sliced through him now and again. He’d wanted to give her the world wrapped in a pretty bow. He’d wanted her to be happy. Had he given her what she’d needed before she was taken from the world?

“Quinn.”

Quinn’s eyes snapped to his brother’s.

“Man, you were totally in la-la land there for a minute.”

“Sorry, I was thinking about Maddie.”

KC expression went serious. “Oh. You still miss her, don’t you?”

It had been such a long time since she passed. Yes, he missed her. He thought about her and what her life would be like had she survived. He thought about what would put a smile on her young face. He’d loved her. And in his own special way, he still loved her. While Maddie held a special place in his heart, Piper held another.

“Yes,” Quinn finally answered. “I’ve been thinking about her a lot more recently since…Piper, you know.”

“Ah.” KC maneuvered to the door. “Still can’t see yourself marrying again, huh?”

Quinn shook his head, his throat suddenly constricted. He’d wanted to make Maddie happy in life. And now he wanted to same for Piper. But he couldn’t give her what she wanted. What she needed.

While Piper held a big part of his heart, his life, Maddie had gotten there first, had needed that commitment to die with a smile on her face. Quinn had promised her to think of her always, to never let anyone take her place. And he had to keep that promise. If only for Maddie. Quinn’s own happiness didn’t matter at this point. And since he knew Piper couldn’t have his love any other way,
this
was the only way.

Quinn finally said, “Let’s get the last of these boxes out of here so I can go home and wash up.”

KC shot him a wry glance. “You mean brood, don’t you?”

Quinn bumped his shoulder on the way to the door. “Shut up.”

“I wish Del were here, then I wouldn’t have to put up with you alone. I haven’t seen you like this in…well, ever.”

“Del wouldn’t be any help. He’d only get on my nerves.”

“He’ll be back next week. I’ll be sure to tell him how much his older brother loves him.”

Quinn stopped short. “Back? What for? He got the promotion and he should be on the base for several more months before he gets a leave.”

KC chuckled. “Really, Quinn? I guess you’re forgetting at how good Del is at getting what he wants.”

“The Air Force doesn’t work like that,” Quinn grunted, finally making his way out of the library and down the hall. KC followed closely on his heels.

“True. Word is that Del is coming back to celebrate his brother’s marriage.”

“
What?
”

A full-bellied laugh echoed down the hallway. “Yeah, that’s what I thought. Grandpa called Del when you and Piper were in Vegas, and I think the boy got the wrong idea. He knows you aren’t married—now—but he didn’t when he requested the leave. He’s not the type to take back the request, you know.”

Quinn rolled his eyes. “Of course not. So now he’s going to come home and give me grief.”

“That’s our boy.”

Speaking of Vegas, Quinn hadn’t got the chance to discuss what really happened between him and Piper with his grandpa. He’d only briefly mentioned that Piper had taken the lead and had done a wonderful job. He’d lied, which he felt terrible about.

Before they finished moving the stuff out of the house, Quinn had to set the record straight.

“Go ahead and take that box to the truck,” Quinn said, nodding toward the front door. “I want to talk to Grandpa before we head out.”

“Got it.”

With that, the men separated, and Quinn went in search of his grandpa. As he walked through the empty halls of the house, a box still in his grip, he heard his grandpa’s voice drift out of the dining room.

As he stepped closer, he heard another unmistakable voice.

Piper.

He inched close to the partially open door, holding his breath…and listened.

“Thank you for stopping, Piper,” his grandpa said. “I appreciate the update on the conference. Macy has been a little odd about the whole week.”

“Oh, well, I imagine it’s because Vegas was a big shock to him. He met lots of people in a field that’s somewhat…different than what he’s used to.”

“That’s not what I meant, dear. Macy mentioned it went well, that you took the reins, per se, and did a wonderful job. But he didn’t quite get into specifics about the reception. When he got home after the week, he seemed distracted.”

“The week?” Piper’s voice went up an octave. “The whole week?”

Grandpa chuckled. “Yes, dear. Why do you make it sound so odd?”

Quinn cringed. He knew why it sounded odd. After he’d left Piper’s room, he hadn’t come home. He’d stayed in Vegas, hoping Piper would change her mind, hoping she’d call. She hadn’t. On the final day, he’d changed his flight to leave a few hours before her, his sense of loss swamping him. But he’d had plenty of time to think over what Piper had said. Even though the giant hole in his heart was growing deeper each day, he couldn’t give Piper what she needed. That was plain and simple.

So far he’d only told his brother about him and Piper. He hadn’t had the guts to tell his grandpa, who thought so well of Piper.

“Oh, it’s…” Her voice drifted off. “Nothing, George. It’s nothing. The reception went wonderfully, as you can imagine. After telling everyone about your foundation, the need was immediate and people said they’d wished there was something around like this a long time ago. I’m sure your foundation is getting applications as we speak.”

“Wonderful!”

“And I imagine that you’ll even have a few more donors, as well. I didn’t realize how many people in my field are veterans, and several of them mentioned contacting you to set up a donation.”

“That’s more than I could have asked for, Piper. Much more.” The pride in his grandpa’s voice was evident.

Quinn mentally smacked himself for letting his grandpa down…even though the man didn’t know it. No matter the differences he and Piper had, he should have stayed in Vegas
and
talked about the foundation near and dear to his family’s heart. It seemed that his judgment had gone down the drain when Piper had given him the ultimatum.

“Anytime, George.”

Quinn heard shuffling in the room and jerked back from the door as it slid open.

“Macy!” Grandpa’s face was beaming. “We were just talking about you.”

He did his best to keep his face stoic, but he was clutching the box for dear life. “Oh, really?”

He dared cast a glance at Piper. She was giving him a beautiful smile. Not any smile…a smile that said
I missed you.

“She was giving me all the details about the conference that you’ve neglected to tell me about—”

“Listen, Grandpa…about that—”

Piper’s hand shot out and clasped around Quinn’s elbow. “He did wonderfully, George. You should be proud of him.”

“Piper, don’t.”

Her eyes narrowed briefly, and her grip loosened.

“I wasn’t there, Grandpa,” Quinn said. He cleared his throat and spilled his guts. “I didn’t want to tell you because you were so fond of Piper, but she and I separated at the conference and we opted to let her do the presentation by herself. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you the truth. And I’m sorry I let you down.”

Grandpa blinked, his eyes darting between the two of them. He reached out and patted Quinn gently on the cheek. “You don’t think I realized that moment you came home, son?”

“I…” What could he say?

“It was plainly written on your face. I’ve been waiting for you to tell me. You’ve been hanging around here all week when I knew darn good and well you should’ve been with Piper.” His eyes continued to dance between them. “And it looks as though you two could use a talk. I’ll get out of your way. Come and see me when you get done, Macy.”

“Yes, sir.”

Grandpa strolled down the hallway, his limp more prominent than Quinn remembered it. When he disappeared around the corner at the end of the hall, Quinn realized that he and Piper were alone for the first time since Vegas.

Warily, he slid his gaze to hers. She looked glowing dressed down in jeans and a yellow tee, but Quinn couldn’t pin down the emotion flashing in her eyes.

“You didn’t tell him?” she asked, crossing her arms across her chest.

“No.”

“Afraid to let him down?”

“Yes.”

“Were you ever going to tell him?”

“Yes.”

“When?”

“Eventually.”

Her arms unfolded. “Am I going to get more than one-word responses from you?”

“Is there something you need from me, Piper? I’m in the middle of something.” He jangled the box at his side. He didn’t mean to be rude, but he couldn’t stand being in the hallway with her. Couldn’t stand the soft features of her face, how her hair bounced as she talked. How he wanted everything to work out between them, but knew he couldn’t. He couldn’t give her everything and she deserved that. She’d done the thing right thing by walking away from him.

Her brow furrowed. “Yes, actually, there is something I want from you.”

Before Quinn could blink, Piper’s lips were on his. Hot, silky smooth, and demanding. The box he’d held crashed to floor as he groaned and wrapped his arms around her. God, he missed the feel of her. Her floral scent, her spicy taste. It surrounded him, engulfed him, and made him want to do things in the hallway he shouldn’t have been thinking about.

The pain in his chest grew as she took the kiss deeper, probing for the emotions he knew she would find. Hopeless love that had no means to an end. Desperate needs that couldn’t commit.

“Piper.” At first his voice murmured against their tangled lips, but as her body curled itself around him, as his erection throbbed painfully in his jeans, Quinn fought for a clearer head.

“
Piper.
” His voice held more strength, even though his hands were making their way over every inch of her backside.

“I’ve missed you, Quinn.” Her words splintered what was left of his control. One hand dove into her hair as the other cupped the back of her neck. He pressed her against the wall, enjoying the wiggle of her hips against him. He groaned as tongues twisted, breaths exchanged, and sparks erupted from limb to limb. He was instantly lit on fire by her flames.

With everything he had, he tore himself away from her. Her eyes were dilated, her lips a lush, plump pink. After two weeks, the feelings were still there, still as strong as they had been. A desire that ran so deep, Quinn knew, he’d never escape it.

With a strangled voice, he asked, “Why did you do that, Piper? I thought—”

She shook her head, her hair falling over her eyes. “I wanted to talk.”

He’d almost taken her on the floor in his grandpa’s house. He rubbed a hand over his tense face.

“I thought you were done with me in Vegas.”

She gave him a tentative smile. “That’s what I wanted to talk about,” she said. “I made a mistake, Quinn. I was going to come and see you as soon as I left here. But since you’re here…can we talk now?”

A lump caught in his throat. She’d made a mistake?

“I’m sorry, Piper, I’m confused. Come and sit down.” He gestured toward the living room. She moved that way, her tennis shoes silent across the floor. Her hips swayed, and she walked straight and narrow, as though she was confident and cool. Which was far from what Quinn was feeling. He followed her, sweat forming on his brow. As she drifted in from of him, her floral scent wrapped around him, cloaking him with feelings he wasn’t ready to let go. Feelings he knew weren’t fair.

Piper perched herself on the left side of the plaid loveseat and locked eyes with him. “Sit with me?”

He wouldn’t say no. So instead of doing what he thought was right, he moved next to her, his arm tingling from her touch as she rested her hand on it.

“Before we go any further,” she said, her voice unwavering, “tell me why you didn’t tell your grandpa the truth? And where did you go after you left the hotel room if not home?”