Until the End of Time (7 page)

“Are you considering this church?” She was visibly panicked. They both knew it would mean giving up her career. She couldn’t move to Wyoming and consult in New York, given her demanding clients, and her work was very hands-on. The only two churches that had wanted him so far had been in Kentucky and Wyoming.

“I told you, I turned them down. We’re not moving to Wyoming. But they’re nice letters, and they sound like good people. I just wanted you to see it. I haven’t dared show you the first letter until
now.” And the second letter sounded even more desperate than the first one. They had offered him more money and reminded him that the pastorship came with a house. “I felt wrong not telling you about it, Jen. At least it was an option.” He didn’t want her to think he was a total loser, and had no offers at all, or wasn’t trying. He truly was trying to find a church and a job.

“I’d have to give up work if you took it,” she said, and he could see that she was close to tears as he put an arm around her to reassure her.

“I won’t do that to you, Jenny.”

“But you need a church. What if you can’t find one?” There were tears in her eyes.

“I will. It may take a while to locate one around here. I can do the chaplaincy work till then. It’s something to do.”

“But that’s not what you want,” she said miserably. It had never occurred to her while he was studying that he wouldn’t find a church. They had had no idea how scarce available churches were, or how far away. She didn’t want to hold him back, but she wasn’t ready to give up her career and move to a place like Wyoming, and she knew she never would be. Bill knew it too.

“It has to bless us both. Not just me,” he said calmly. “It sounds great, though. All we have to do is find something like it around here.”

“What if we don’t?” Her eyes were huge in her face.

“We will,” he said, trying to exhibit an optimism he no longer felt. He had written hundreds of letters with copies of his résumé in the past six months, and this was by far the best offer he’d had. But it was one he couldn’t take. He didn’t look angry about it, just sad and disappointed, which made her heart ache for him.

He put the letters away then, and they had a quiet dinner that night. It had been an important day for him, and a hard one at the lunch. And now Jenny felt as though the offer of the pastorship in Wyoming was hanging over their heads. And she knew it was important to him, or he wouldn’t have shown her the letters. She was quiet that night, as she thought about it, and lay in bed next to him wide awake, in the dark.

“I can hear you worrying,” he said gently as he put an arm around her. “Don’t. I’m not going to drag you to Wyoming. I wouldn’t ask that of you.” She wanted to say “Thank God,” but she only nodded as tears slid down her cheeks.

“I’m scared you won’t find anything else,” she admitted. She felt as though her whole work life was on the line, and it meant so much to her. Not as much as he did, but she had been building her career for the past fourteen years, since she started Parsons at eighteen. It would be a lot to give up, if it ever came to that. She couldn’t even imagine it.

“We just have to be patient.” Like the baby, which hadn’t happened either, and she was worried about that too. She wondered if he’d be willing to adopt. Until then, they had assumed they’d have their own. But she was beginning to doubt it, since it hadn’t happened in two years. She hoped it wouldn’t take him as long to find a church, but it might.

“I’m sorry, Bill,” she said sadly, thinking as much about the baby as the job.

“I knew when I married you how important your career is to you. You didn’t hide it from me. It’s not a surprise. I love what you do. I’m proud of you, Jenny. I don’t want something that works for me, at
your expense. That wouldn’t be right.” She nodded and snuggled up closer to him. And then very gently, he began making love to her, and their sadness and fears turned to passion. They forgot everything in each other’s arms, and afterward they lay breathless, having been swept away by a tidal wave of love and emotion. She had seen stars while they made love.

He lay holding her, smiling at her, and he didn’t want to say it, but if all it took was love to make a baby, he was sure they had made one that night. And she was thinking exactly the same thing as she kissed him and fell asleep.

Chapter 4

Bill started doing his chaplaincy work at the hospitals and the jail two weeks later. It was challenging and interesting, and he even visited patients in a locked psychiatric ward. All his training in psychology served him well. He spent time talking to all the patients on his list, and although he was only filling in, people began asking for him, and the chaplaincy service increased his days from three to five. And he even enjoyed the work he did at the jail. The women inmates were there for a variety of crimes, including murder, and they found him easy to talk to. He came home exhilarated and with a lot to tell Jenny every night. Neither of them mentioned the church in Wyoming again.

Bill was busy all through June and July, and so was Jenny. On the first of August, the fall Fashion Week was still seven weeks away, but things were heating up, and some of her younger designer clients needed a lot of help. Bill noticed that she was coming home exhausted every night, from running around in the heat. They had been invited away for several weekends, but she had to work. And
he used the time to send out more letters with his résumé. So far nothing had turned up. They were both relieved when they were invited to the Hamptons by one of her more important clients. It would be good to get out of the city.

They talked on the way out, crawling through the weekend traffic leaving New York on Friday, and then Jenny fell asleep in the front seat. She had had a long week. They wanted to go to Maine in August, or Martha’s Vineyard, but Jenny wasn’t sure she could get away. This was the start of a busy time for her, which would become frantic all through September. With one collection following another, it was hard for her to leave her clients at any time of the year. And Bill was anxious to spend some vacation time with her. He was thinking about it when she woke up an hour later, and they were only halfway there.

“Sorry I fell asleep.” She smiled at him. But she felt better and less tired.

“You need it. You’re exhausted. You’ve been running around like a maniac all week.” She didn’t usually get tired, she had boundless energy, but everyone was tired in the crushing heat, even Jenny. He could hardly wait to get to the beach and swim and relax and enjoy the weekend. And he liked their host. When Bill started to say something to her about it, he noticed that she was distracted. She took out her datebook and glanced through it, calculated something, and then looked at him in amazement.

“Oh my God … I just realized something … I’ve been so busy for the past few weeks, I didn’t notice …” She was smiling at him mysteriously, and he had no idea what she was talking about, as they finally picked up speed.

“Didn’t notice what? Please don’t tell me you forgot ten more appointments and two new clients and you have to work this weekend,” he teased her, but he wasn’t far off the mark. She had been working seven days a week for months.

“I think I might be pregnant,” she said softly, as though she were afraid to say it, and he glanced at her sharply, and then turned his eyes back to the road.

“Are you serious?” He was as excited as she was and a little shocked.

“I think it happened the night you graduated. I’m late. Really, really late. Like four weeks late. I forgot all about it.” And as she said it, he felt a shiver run down his spine. Suddenly he was as sure as she was. He remembered their sudden passion, after the hideous lunch with his parents, and talking about the church he had turned down in Wyoming. He remembered thinking that she might have gotten pregnant that night, and then he had forgotten about it too. He reached over and touched her cheek gently with his hand, and she turned to look at him with eyes full of hope.

“I’ll check it out on Monday,” she said in barely more than a whisper, and then she put her arms around him and kissed him. But there was no other reason either of them could think of for her being late. That never happened to her. It was going to be a long weekend, waiting to find out on Monday, but suddenly they were both sure. It had finally happened, after two years. They tried not to get too excited, but by the time they got to the Hamptons, it was all they could talk about or think of. If she was really pregnant, their dream had come true.

They spent a wonderful weekend with her client, and enjoyed the
people he had invited for dinner. He gave two beautiful dinner parties, and they had a room with an ocean view. Bill and Jenny took long walks on the beach and swam in the ocean, and on Sunday night they went back to the city, relaxed and tanned and in great spirits. She could hardly wait to call her doctor in the morning. Bill was up before she was and brought her a cup of tea. They didn’t dare talk about a baby until they knew, but it was on their minds.

She stopped and had a blood test on the way to the office. They had to wait a day for the results. And she tried to concentrate on her work, which was nearly impossible. Even Azaya noticed something different about her, after the weekend. Nelson Wu was working with them too, helping them get ready for the shows. They were a good team.

“You’re in a great mood. Did something happen?” Jenny avoided her eyes, afraid that something would show. She didn’t want to say anything yet, and jinx it.

“We had a terrific time,” she said blithely. She worked till nine o’clock that night, and Bill was home when she got there, relaxing and watching TV, after spending the day counseling inmates at the jail. He had dinner waiting for her, and they went to bed early. She called the doctor from home the minute their office opened the next day. And she almost screamed when the nurse told her she couldn’t give her the results until the doctor came in. Nurses were not allowed to give test results over the phone.

They called her back at nine-thirty, and Jenny held her breath, waiting for the results, and then her doctor came on the line and told her the good news. She was pregnant. They had finally done it. Bill was in the shower when she walked into the bathroom and
stood smiling at him with tears rolling down her cheeks. He stuck his head out of the shower, saw the look on her face, and gave a whoop of glee. He stepped out, took her in his arms, and kissed her, and she was soaking wet as soon as he did, but neither of them cared. It had been worth the wait. Bill stood there holding her and kissing her, and telling her how much he loved her. As much as she loved him. And the baby they had wanted so badly and waited so long for was on the way. Their life was complete.

Chapter 5

Jenny was seven weeks pregnant the first time she saw the doctor at the beginning of August, and Bill went to the appointment with her. The baby was due in early March, and everything seemed to be in order, although the doctor said she was a little on the thin side. He wanted her to gain a few pounds, and Bill told him that she worked too hard, and came home late every night. Jenny pointed out that Fashion Week was coming up and she couldn’t let her clients down. They were moving into high gear and pulling her in a million directions with their needs and demands, collections to complete and runway shows to plan.

“I’m not going to stop working just because I’m pregnant,” she said quietly. She was hoping to work right till the end, and the doctor didn’t see why she shouldn’t, as long as she was reasonable about it.

“
Reasonable
isn’t in your vocabulary,” Bill scolded her. “Not as far as work is concerned. Your work isn’t compatible with that word,” nor her style. She gave everything she did two thousand percent,
and it showed in the results. That was why her clients loved her the way they did, and needed her so much. They all claimed they couldn’t do what they did without her. She knew that wasn’t true, they had the talent, but she fine-tuned it for them and put it in sharper focus. And it was always nice hearing their praise. Mrs. Vreeland had said it about her too, that she had the best eye of anyone she knew, particularly for someone so young. She had an instinctive sense of what was right for each designer’s collection and was able to home in on each one’s unique style, without borrowing from anyone else.

“Will you please try to slow down a little?” Bill begged her when they left the appointment. She’d been given a prescription for prenatal vitamins and iron pills, which the doctor had warned her might upset her stomach, but she felt fine so far. She had none of the symptoms of pregnancy yet, which was why she hadn’t suspected it sooner, and she’d been too busy to notice the missed period. She hoped she’d continue to feel well, she didn’t want to get behind on her work, although she promised Bill that she would rely on Azaya more than she had, if her clients were amenable to it. And she would ask Nelson to come in more often too.

“I don’t care what they want,” Bill growled at her. “This baby is too important to us.” And just as he had known would happen, it had come at the right time, for both of them. They were ready, he had graduated, all he needed now was a church, and in the meantime he was keeping busy with his chaplaincy work at the hospitals and women’s jail. He had a gift for talking to people, with understanding and compassion, and making them feel that someone cared. He was holding church services at the jail now and was surprised
at how many women came. He wanted to start a group for abused women, which in most instances was related to their crimes. He was nonjudgmental about how they’d gotten there and already knew many of the inmates by name. He had just gotten a request to start working at the men’s jail as well and was looking forward to it.

After the doctor’s appointment, Bill went to one of the hospitals where he was doing relief work for a minister who had been sick for several months, and Jenny went to meet a new client, a young Swedish girl who had enormous talent and was going to show her first collection during Fashion Week in the fall. Jenny was helping her put the show together to get the greatest impact on the runway. It was exciting to work with her right at the beginning of her career. She could really make a difference for her, and gave her great advice. They spent most of the day together, and she stopped in to see David Fieldston briefly after that. He had added two new looks to the line he was showing in September and wanted to know what Jenny thought about them. She told him they were incredible, although she suggested modifying the silhouette of one of them to give it a cleaner line. They pinned the sample he was working on, and it looked better immediately. She left his office at six o’clock and went back to her own.