Vaalbara; Visions & Shadows (27 page)

             
“No, Eamar! Why?” My body started shaking so badly my teeth began to clatter.

             
The raw terror I felt for this monstrous being in front of me surpassed any fear I’d ever felt before. Bile rose up from my churning stomach, remembering the three weeks I’d spend at the mercy of his fists. I remembered the sound of his cracking whip, and a strangled moan escaped from deep inside me, as the rest of the memories I’d tried so hard to suppress hit me full on.

             
The very thing my nightmares were made of stood before me.

             
“R-R-Raighne.” My chest was closing with panic. I knew I had to try to calm down for my Chosen Ones, at least.  Still, all I could focus on was this monster in front of me. 

             
Raighne, I can’t cope with this! Do something, please!

             
It was at this point that Carter took a step towards me and actually reached out to me as if he was sorry for what he’d done. I scrambled further away, straight into Jason and Lee’s confused arms. They yanked me up behind them, as Raighne tore loose from his father’s grip, grabbing hold of Carter. He slammed him so hard into the wall some of the paint and plaster chipped off.

             
It all happened in a split second, though in that second he was not the Carter from the shack. His eyes were not the dead, pale eyes which had tortured me every day for all those hours. They were the eyes that last day he ask me for forgiveness - the ones filled with raw sadness - only now the guilt shone too.

             
“What is this, father? Why is he here?  Why is he still alive? I will kill Carter myself for what he has done to Alchera!” Raighne’s voice was filled with sheer hatred. He lifted his blade, although froze in midair when his father spoke.

             
“Carter is your cousin.” Eamar pulled Raighne away. “He is your family…our family. He is Adeth’s son and was under her spell. He is as much a victim as Alchera was. Adeth came back for him after fully turning to the shadowed side. She took Carter when he was only six-years-old.” Eamar positioned himself between Raighne and Carter, and continued, “Adeth kept him under a spell woven in Hell, itself. He had no control over what he did. He was her puppet, to do her bidding when she so willed it.”

             
“No!” The word had slipped through my lips before I could stop it. I couldn’t believe he wanted to call this beast family. “He has the same d-dark powers she has.” Oh crap, I was going to be sick. Maybe Sid should be recalled, considering he was the only one who made any sense at all anymore.

             
Eamar nodded. “Yes, he does have those powers. Adeth tested potions and spells on him that you could only dream of. The things I know would make you turn inside-out. Once she perfected the potion or spell on him she would use it on herself to gain her powers.”

             
“So he still has th-them?” I curled further behind Jason.

             
“Yes, but he is no longer entranced. For reasons unknown, Carter’s mind rebelled.” Eamar looked at Carter again, as if to make his point.

             
“I killed Adeth, although I was not fast enough. She got…she killed Aurian.” Raighne’s voice lowered to a whisper at the end. It only made me feel more guilty for the part I’d played. I was again responsible for the loss of a family member. I tried not to take my eyes off Carter, not believing for one second that he was even close to being as harmless as Eamar was making him out to be.

             
I shouted, “That’s not true!” My voice dropped to that same malicious tone I’d had back at Jason’s home. “If I didn’t hit Adeth with that stupid pillow she wouldn’t have stabbed Aurian. I might as well have killed him myself. It was all me. I’m slowly killing my whole family, one by one.” I couldn’t help but look into Alandra’s shocked eyes.

             
“I’m so sorry, Alandra. Michael gave me ‘one question’ and I chose to save Jason’s animals, not thinking for one moment about our father off fighting Adeth. I let him die, and now I’ve caused Aurian’s death, as well.” I pulled loose from Jason and Lee, walking away from everyone. 

             
“I would stay away from me if I were you, you’re probably next.”

~*~

I sat outside for an hour, with Jason sitting not far from me. He didn’t say a word, which I appreciated. I wanted to be alone and think about as little as possible.

             
Yes, I knew it wasn’t a possibility, not with Carter so close. All I could think about was him. Where was he? Was the monster watching me? It was driving me insane not knowing what he was busy doing or planning. I had to deal with the fact that he was here, alive, able to walk around freely. I was reeling with emotions. Even on
this
planet, he should be held accountable for his crimes.

             
And where was Raighne in all of this? Where was he when I needed him the most?

             
Alandra came outside as the sun began to set, bringing sandwiches with her. Did they really think I would be able to eat at a time like this - with that man lurking somewhere?

             
“Thanks for the trouble, but I’m gonna’ skip the sandwiches.” 

             
“Eat.”

             
I gave her a tired glance. Alandra would always win. I took a sandwich and, in defeat, I choked it down.

             
Evin brought us coffee. He was also the first to break the silence. “Are you feeling better now?” He looked at me like a scientist dissecting a fly.

             
“Why? What did they send you tell me now?”

             
He laughed, which was totally out of character for him.

             
“I chose to come talk to you. My father has not returned yet.” He took a deep breath, reminding me of Raighne. There was big news to come - news I wasn’t going to like.

             
“As soon as my father and Carter return from Vaalbara they are going to stay with us. My father feels we can move faster with Carter shimmering us to where you need to go to save The Chosen. His powers will be beneficial to us.”

             
My mouth opened and closed a few times with no sound coming out. I was at a total loss for words.

             
That voice appeared behind me; the voice from my nightmares. “I know I am the last person you want help from. I know if you could, you would kill me yourself. Alchera, I cannot fix, or make up to you for what I have done. Please allow me to help you fulfill your destiny.” Carter’s voice made me feel insanely sick. I made a run for the backyard, where I found some privacy behind a tree, and transferred the sandwich to the birds.

             
A hand reached past me, handing me a towel. I should’ve known it was Carter. Why couldn’t I
sense
him?

             
“I know what I did to you deserves death. I remember every second. You might not believe me now, Alchera, but I was screaming just as hard as you were. I was trapped inside my body. My arms were moving without me saying so. I was not the one in control of what I did. My m…Adeth, was the one giving the instructions. Every day I wanted to die with you. I prayed as hard, if not harder. I would have traded places with you in a second, with no questions asked. It was
not
me doing those horrible things to you. I
swear
this, Alchera. Look into my eyes, surely you can see the difference now?”

             
By the time he was finished talking, I thought I was ready to faint. His hands were on my shoulders. If it weren’t for Carter holding me, I think my body would have shaken to pieces right there.

             
I forced myself to look into the eyes of my enemy, expecting to see the cold, dead gaze that was imprinted on my soul, although that wasn’t what greeted me. His eyes had turned a deep blue, and were drowned in guilt.

             
“I know you will never forgive me, nor will you ever be able to stand the sight of me.” He swallowed. “But at least let me help you…let me do this one good thing. Please.”

             
I took a step away from him. “Can you not t-touch me?”

             
Carter immediately dropped his hands. “Done.”

             
“Stay away f-from me. If Raighne is not with me I d-don’t want you near me.” I started walking, almost running, towards Alandra and Evin.

             
“Thank you.” He whispered the words with so much emotion it almost made me feel guilty.

             
Almost.

~*~

It was just after eleven, and I was staring up at a new blood red moon.  Most of the guys were asleep. It scared me, not knowing what I was really up against. Was Awo out there thinking of me? It made me wonder where Elora was and how she was dealing with her fate. Did she even know about Aurian’s death?

             
I was under a tree, only a few feet from the door, when Raighne came outside followed quickly by his father.

             
“Raighne, wait.” He turned slightly. I flattened myself against the tree, trying to make myself unseen.

             
“I need to talk with you, in private. The house is too crowded.”

             
“What is this regarding, father?” His tone was clipped and cold. Light coming from one of the bedrooms spotlighted Raighne’s rigid form.

             
“I had a talk with Carter. You already know we are going to join you on this last stretch of your mission and I…wanted to warn you.” I could see Eamar tensing up. “Carter has some feelings for Alchera.”

             
“What!” His voice fractured the darkness like a lightning bolt. Raighne looked like he was about to explode.

             
Eamar placed his hand on his shoulder, in an attempt to calm him. “Let me finish. He is as much a victim as she. He had no control over what happened. Carter was stuck in his body, forced to watch while his hands tortured her. He wanted to protect her despite the fact that he nearly ended up killing her. Carter’s spirit was still alive in there. He saw Alchera every day, fighting, not willing to give up.”

             
Raighne spoke through clenched teeth. “He beat her to a pulp. Her back was pulverized. It took me three healings to try and fix her. He broke every one of her ribs. I will never forget the sounds she made the night you brought her back.”

             
Raighne’s voice was dripping with venom. “You go back to that ‘thing’ you choose to call family, and tell him I will make him suffer tenfold for what he has put Alchera through if he so much as touches a hair on her head.”

             
“Calm down, my son. This is not like—”

             
Raighne lost control just then and shouted, “She is my life! I will not let Carter or any other man take her away from me. Alchera is
mine
and she has been through enough!” He stormed back into the house.

             
My heart stopped. Did I hear right? Did he really feel that way about me? I wasn’t thinking of Eamar still standing there when I moved from my hiding place. I needed to get to Raighne.

             
“Alchera! You heard…everything?” Eamar sounded exhausted.

             
“I was sitting over there when you came out and I didn’t want to…interrupt.”

             
He sighed. “It is just as well. Carter told me he spoke with you earlier.”

             
“Yes.” I didn’t want to talk about Carter. Not now.

             
“How do you feel about him being here?” I wasn’t expecting the question. I’ve pushed everything about Carter aside, yet I was now being forced to deal with him being right in front of me as an…ally.

             
“I’m trying not to think about it. I don’t want to see him. How do I feel about him? He is the vilest creature I‘ve ever known. I believe that Hell holds a special place for him.” I walked towards the door when Eamar took me by the arm.

             
“I understand your fear. After all, it was I who saw you first. I remember it like it was yesterday. Still, I have never been wrong about people. I am telling you now that Carter has suffered the same fate as you, and at the hand of his own mother. Do not make him pay for Adeth’s sins now when he is finally free of her.” He let go of me.

             
“How do I forgive him? I can never forget what Carter did to me. What you ask is impossible.”

             
Eamar tilted his head to the side, reminding me of Alder for a brief moment. “Forgiveness comes when you least expect it. Be careful, Alchera, to say never.”