Vegas Miracle (17 page)

"He has told me all about you.  He hardly ever stops talking about you."

She glanced back at him and Henri raised an eyebrow at her.   Grace rolled her eyes but he just laughed and leaned in to plant a kiss on her cheek.  Closing his eyes against the intensity of his burgeoning feelings for the woman, Henri stood and took their dishes to the large sink.

"More coffee?"  He held up the press.

"Sure," she jumped as the phone buzzed against her elbow.   Seeing it was Ryan, Henri reached across her and shut it off before she could answer.

"Let’s talk a little while," he offered his hand and led her back into the dim restaurant.  Flipping on a few lights, he settled her into a soft couch in the waiting area.  Patrons had been known to sit here for hours, waiting for a coveted table at Christophe’s.  Henri made sure they were comfortable during their vigil.  She sank into the cushy leather sofa with a sigh.    Henri sat next to her, one arm pulling her close.  He put his lips on her hair and breathed in the clean, just washed scent of her before speaking.

"You know Ryan and I have been together a while."  He held on when she tried to pull away.  "But nothing we did or said ever diminished what he had with you — what you two have together."  Grace settled back into his shoulder and let him pull her arm across his waist.   The feel of her against him comforted Henri in ways he never knew he needed.   "I know it’s farfetched, maybe even pure fantasy to think we, and I mean the three of us, can make this relationship work."

Grace scoffed.  "Yeah, I’m picturing myself introducing you to my dad."

Henri laughed.  "I understand he's a real foodie.  You might be surprised.  I think he might just love me."

He felt her smile against his chest.

"Anyway, I’m going to say what Ryan should have said years ago.  He loves you, Grace.  With everything in his being.  More than he loves me, I’m certain.  But I’m okay with that." She looked up at him and he had to kiss her, parting her lips slightly with his tongue.  Her hand reached up to cradle his face and Henri grabbed it, twining his fingers in hers.  They broke away, but kept their hands joined.

Henri stared up at the ornate ceiling of his restaurant.

"But I love him.  You love him.  And quite frankly, I'm falling in love with you.  And I think we may have a deeper connection between us."

Grace gasped as he released her hand and knelt between her legs, laying his dark head in her lap.  He felt her hands in his hair, pulling it free of the leather band he used in the kitchen.  He looked up at her and put a hand on her flat stomach, a question in his eyes.  She bit her lip and a tear slid down her cheek.  He watched as she swallowed hard as she covered his hand with hers.  Her wedding ring flashed in his vision.

"I can’t, I mean, he won’t," she gulped and put her hands over her eyes as Henri laid his head back in her lap, wrapping arms around her waist.

"He can and he will," Henri murmured into her denim-clad thigh.

"No, you don’t understand," she shifted so Henri had to move, but he remained on his knees in front of her.  "Ryan doesn't want to have kids.  While I sort of get why, I don’t like it.  That doesn’t change the fact I promised him we wouldn’t, that I wouldn’t pressure him."

"Ryan wants whatever you want, Grace.  Why haven’t you figured that out yet?"

"He’s a harder man to live with than you know," she muttered.  "He just goes away inside himself and won’t let me near him emotionally.  I can’t stand it sometimes."

Henri chuckled.  "Yeah, I do know.  But my advantage is that as a guy, I get that about him.  I can leave him alone and know he’ll be back.  It’s harder for you. "

She glared at him.  He crooked a finger under her chin and made her smile.   Henri pulled her forward towards him, the need to reassure her that this arrangement could work foremost in his mind.   He whispered in her ear.

"This baby, our baby. It will bind us together, don’t you see?"

"Yeah, but what if, you know, it was you," she trailed off.

Henri gripped her shoulders and pulled away, making her look at him.  He could feel his out of control emotions making his voice shaky.

"Nothing would make me happier.  Honestly, what a great excuse for Ryan to ‘practice’ being a dad to your child?  If he didn’t feel all that self-imposed bullshit pressure about being a good father?  I think it would be perfect."

He lowered his lips to hers, holding her head in his hands, fisting her hair tightly as he reveled in her taste.   Shifting to make room for the pressure under his zipper, Henri tried to let his lips and tongue tell her all she needed to know about his deep need, his emotional connection to both her and to Ryan.  Grace broke away, breathing hard, eyes glistening.

"Henri, do you really think he’ll be okay with it?  I mean, I don’t know what I’d do if he…"

"Grace, Ryan would never leave you.  I've never seen a man more in love with a woman. He just needs to know you're okay with me, with the three of us. With this." He put a hand on her stomach again.  She smiled and put her head on his shoulder and Henri cradled her there for several minutes in the quiet peace of his empty restaurant.    A calm content settled in him just before all hell broke loose.

Chapter Fifteen

The fuzzy sleepiness she now had an explanation for stole over her as she let Henri hold her, loving the smell of him, the feel of his compact, firm body against her.  Just for a moment, she allowed herself the fantasy, her, Ryan and Henri together, a complete family.   Grace blinked against the assault as the main lights of the restaurant blazed to life.

"Henri!" Ryan’s familiar voice cut through her reverie.  Henri released her and stood up.   "Where the fuck are you?"  Grace could tell from the sound of his footsteps Ryan had on dress shoes.  She sighed and took Henri’s proffered hand before they came out from the alcove to face him.

Ryan was staring at his smartphone, leaning on the elaborate hostess desk as they approached him.  Dressed in summer wool trousers and a crisp blue cotton shirt, the man was devastatingly handsome.  And angry.  Which made Grace hold her breath.  When he raised his eyes and looked at her, she was shocked to see sadness there.

She took a step towards him, wondering if something happened to his brother.  He took a corresponding step back leaving her between the two men.

"We have to go," he snapped at Henri without taking his eyes from Grace.  "Or at least I have to go."  His broad shoulders slumped as he spoke.  Henri pulled Grace back and put an arm around her waist.  Grace’s heart pounded so hard she could barely hear herself think.   Henri tightened his grip on her.

"
Pourquoi
?" Henri’s voice stayed mild.

"Narita-san, Tokyo, that account I’ve been trying to land for months?  They’re ready to sign," he glanced down at his buzzing phone then put it to his ear.  "Hello? Hey, yeah, Jan, I, um…yeah I know I’m supposed to be with Grace," he shot Grace a dark look that she returned.

"But I can’t not go.  Not after all the work we’ve put into….what? No, she’s not joining me." He walked away before she could hear anymore.

She pulled away from Henri, her breathing quickening with a familiar Ryan-inspired anger.  It was utterly absurd to think Ryan had enough love in his hardened heart for her, much less for her, Henri and a child.  Who was she kidding?

Images of herself traveling and trying to promote yet more books while attempting single parenthood flew across her vision.  She shut her eyes and took a silent vow to embrace that life before spending another minute wondering where she stood with Ryan, summarily ignored and dismissed in one moment, plied with gifts and sex the next.  He was too emotionally stunted to sustain this and she couldn’t take it anymore.  Henri was sweet but he was a fool to think otherwise.  Besides, maybe the two of them were better off without her.  Henri boasted he could handle Ryan’s sullen silences and moodiness.  Maybe Grace should let him have at it.

She brushed the young man’s hand from her shoulder and marched over to her husband who turned, deep blue eyes dark, his brow furrowed.  She gulped and put her hands on her hips.

"If you leave now, so help me God, Ryan, you’d better bring an attorney when you get back."  Chest heaving from the effort, she raised her chin and met his glare.  "Because I'm done."

"Sorry dear, but your lifestyle demands that I sometimes drop what I’m doing to rush off to make money," his voice was quiet, the calm before the storm she knew well.

"I have zero expectations for my lifestyle.  You should know that better than anyone. 
You
created this lifestyle for me and I do enjoy it, but I don’t need it." Her fists were clenched so tight they ached.  "That’s a bullshit excuse you use all the time so you can run away when things start to get complicated."   Ryan looked away.  It hurt her heart seeing him upset but enough was enough.  Grace stood her ground although she sensed it shifting beneath her feet.

"When you sat outside my hotel room door in New York six years ago, nearly beating it down, yelling, waking up the entire hallway, begging me on your knees to please marry you, I had hope.  I hoped you might change.  Hoped you could possibly face whatever demons were chasing you and let me in, let me help." She took a deep, shuddering breath putting a hand to her lips against a quick surge of nausea.  "Instead you created a little world for us, a magic world where I immediately got published, an agent appearing out of nowhere and I could buy whatever my heart desired. You showered me with gifts, trips, anything and everything."

Ryan’s jaw clenched.  "And this is a problem how, exactly?  I can think of six or seven other women who wanted nothing more from me."

Grace put her hand up to cut him off.  "The problem is inside this world the unspoken rule is 'don’t expect Ryan to give you anything of himself.'  Sure, he’ll buy you shit all day long. He’ll arrange it so the right agent sees your work, so you can spend all day writing but at the end of that day, you’d best leave him alone and let him brood and disconnect from you a little more every single day until all that’s left is the body he uses to fuck you with.  Nothing more.  No real emotion, no honesty," she glanced back at Henri who stood silent, watching the scene unfold.  "You couldn’t even tell me about Henri.  I know you’ve been together nearly two years now, Ryan.  He told me."

Ryan glared over Grace’s shoulder at Henri.

"Don’t you
dare
blame him.  He’s the only honest man in this room."  Grace surprised herself with her vehemence.  Ryan started to turn and leave but Grace ran around in front of him and put both hands on his arms.  Tears threatened but she held them back.   It was too easy for him to discount crying.

"Ryan, I love you.  I’ve loved you since the first day I laid eyes on you.  I want you to be happy.  But it just doesn’t seem like you're happy with me anymore.  I don’t understand it.  I know you told me some stuff last month, but then you fucking disappeared again for three weeks as if you hadn’t told me about your brother’s suicide or anything more than the price of fuel for the plane you want to buy.

"And now," she gestured to Henri who took a step towards them.  "Here we are.  The three of us and yet you're managing to crawl away again without facing what we could, what we should, have together." She dropped her arms and let tears fall, to hell with his reaction.

"After all your turmoil and worry about what I might do or say, I’m the one who's here, willing to give this
arrangement
you forced on me a try.  But we have to talk about it together, honestly and openly or none of it means a damn thing."  She stepped back and crossed her arms. "You're the boss.  You can tell Tokyo to wait a few days.   I’m telling you right now if you don’t, if you walk away from me, from us…I…." Grace gripped the back of a chair as the room started to spin.  Henri was at her side in an instant, holding her up but she shook him off.  "I’m just upset."

"Ryan," she looked at him and held back a sob at the cold look she found in his eyes.  "Things are more complicated now.  You know this. I
know
you know this.  I need you more than ever.  But I won’t have your shell and I won’t share you with Henri if you give him more of your soul than you give me.  We both love you.  We can do this if you’ll let me in and let me know the real you." She held out a hand, hoping he’d take it, but not really sure what he might do next.

"You should know me well enough by now to realize I don’t respond to threats," Ryan’s voice was low.  "If you aren’t happy then leave."  Grace heard Henri suck in a breath behind her but she held out a hand to keep him from speaking.

"I told you I wouldn't be emotionally blackmailed into having kids and I’ll admit I had a moment of weakness, after….well, after we talked.   But I'll be damned if I’ll let you stand there and make me choose between you and my work.  That’s bullshit, Grace, and you know it."

"I’m not asking you to make that choice.  I’m telling you if you don’t sit down and talk with us, let us all have a real conversation about our feelings, about what happens next, then I'm going back to Michigan, finding my own place to live and raise a child and I'll leave you two alone." She put a hand on her stomach.  "That implies you postpone your suddenly important trip, yes.  But don’t twist this into a false ultimatum just because it makes it easier for you."

Ryan took a deep breath.  His eyes were still hard but Grace knew she’d gotten through to him.  Her heart pounded and the room spun again and Henri chose that moment to step up and put an arm around her shoulders so the two of them faced him, watching the complicated display of emotions as they collided across his handsome face.

Ryan looked her in the eyes again.  His words causing her to collapse against Henri who eased her into a chair before he launched himself at Ryan.

"I told you I didn’t want kids. Nothing about that has changed.   Maybe you’ve found someone more suited to your need to breed," he jerked his chin at the young man as Grace let the room close in on her.

Henri whirled on his lover, pushing him against the wall nearest the gated entrance to the restaurant.  Ryan stumbled backwards, caught by surprise.