Victoria Victorious: The Story of Queen Victoria (30 page)

It was a wretched day when Flora's coffin was taken back to her family home.

Crowds had turned out to see it pass through the streets to the waiting barge. I could imagine the scene, the people weeping for her and murmuring angry threats against me; the ballad singers waving their scandal sheets. I could not bear it and my thoughts went back to my
coronation—not so very long ago—when they had shown me such love and devotion.

I was horrified and deeply wounded to learn that someone had thrown a stone at my carriage.

Lord Melbourne tried to comfort me. “It was only one stone. The people were only half-heartedly against you. They just wanted to blame someone and they like having scapegoats in high places. She is gone. That will be an end of the matter. This time next year people will be saying, ‘Who was Flora Hastings?' ”

I should have liked to believe him.

I W
AS VERY MELANCHOLY AFTER THAT. LORD MELBOURNE DID
his best to cheer me up.

He asked me one day what I thought about marriage.

“Marriage? Oh, I have not thought of marriage for a very long time.”

“When did you last think of it?”

“Years ago. You know Uncle Leopold always wanted me to marry my Cousin Albert.”

“I did know,” said Lord Melbourne. “He made it abundantly clear. But it is you who will have to make the match. What do you think?”

“I have no wish to marry…yet.”

“Have you not? You are now twenty years of age. It is a marriageable age…particularly for a queen.”

“I feel it should be set aside for a while.” I burst out laughing. “I have been your pupil for so long that I think as you do. Do
you
not always say ‘leave it alone.' ”

“Advice, I believe, which has more than once proved effective.”

“Indeed it has. Well, now I will keep to it. What do you think of Prince Albert?”

“He is a German.”

“Did you find him a little… solemn?”

“Many Germans are.”

“He was always tired in the evenings and never wanted to dance.”

“And Your Majesty is indefatigable and loves to dance.”

“I do not think that Uncle Leopold should choose my husband for me.”

“With that,” said Lord Melbourne, “I am in complete agreement. But the matter should be given some thought. We have to consider the Cumberland threat.”

“But I am young yet and although the people like me less after the Flora Hastings affair, they still do not want Cumberland.”

“Royalty has to look far ahead. It might be well for you to think a little seriously about marriage.”

“Uncle Leopold believes there is an understanding between me and my Cousin Albert. When he visited me in Kensington Palace before I was Queen he made a very good impression.”

Lord Melbourne nodded.

“That was some time ago.”

“People change,” I said.

“Some become queens, and that is a great transition.”

I laughed, then I was thoughtful. “If people could forget they don't like me so much,” I said, “and if we could hold off the Tories…if we could go on like this…I would ask nothing better.”

“
If
is a very important word and life rarely remains static.”

“You are thinking I should marry.”

“I think you should give the matter some consideration.”

I did; and that brought Uncle Leopold into my thoughts. In spite of the fact that a barrier had grown up between us, I was still very fond of him. I was faithful by nature and I would never forget all that he had meant to me in my childhood. He had been a substitute for the father who had died before I knew him. Once I had thought him the most wonderful being in the world. I did not forget such friendships. It was only because he had wished to interfere in English politics that I had had to withdraw from him a little. My affection remained the same.

I knew so well that he had set his heart on my marrying Albert. He loved Albert as he loved me. We had been his children at the time when he had had none of his own. His greatest dream was to bring us together. A marriage to me would be very advantageous for Albert. After all, he was but the younger son of a German duke. Marriage to the Queen of England would be a very good match for him. And for me? I believe Uncle Leopold considered Albert to be wise and good and that he would be a help to me. He had the welfare of us both at heart.

But I was unsure of myself. I had grown up a good deal since the days when I had first met Albert and been overwhelmed by him. Uncle Leopold had talked so much of his virtues that when he had arrived he had seemed wrapped in an aura of beauty and goodness. I had been very young and impressionable… perhaps I still was… but under the worldly guidance of Lord Melbourne I had grown up a little.

Stockmar had left us some time before this because Uncle Leopold had wanted him to devote all his time to Albert. Uncle Leopold had doubtless seen that Stockmar could do little to guide me when I had taken so wholeheartedly to Lord Melbourne and listened only to him.

I thought I should write frankly to Uncle Leopold, so I did, explaining that for the time being I was quite content with things as they were, and the country did not seem overanxious for me to marry. I thought it would be wiser for Ernest and Albert
not
to pay a visit to England… just yet. What were Albert's thoughts about the matter? He did realize, did he not, that there was no binding engagement. It would be well for him to understand this. I heard such glowing reports of Albert, and I was sure I should like him, but that might be as a friend, a cousin, or a brother. I could not know until I met him again, and I did not want anything to be
expected
from such a meeting. It made the situation rather delicate, particularly if Albert did not have a clear understanding of it. I thought there was no urgent need to come to a decision for two or three years…at the earliest.

I felt relieved when I had sent off that letter. It would give Uncle Leopold a clear picture of how I felt.

I W
AS THROWN
into a whirl of excitement by the visit of yet another uncle. This was Uncle Ferdinand, Mama's brother, with his two sons, Augustus and Leopold, and his daughter, Victoire. With them came another cousin, Alexander Mensdorff-Pouilly, son of Mama's sister, Princess Sophia, and a French nobleman who had escaped from the French Revolution. I found Alexander quite fascinating; his manners were so perfect and he was more restrained than the other cousins who were noisy and liked playing rough games, which I had to admit I enjoyed. But there was something romantic about Alexander. He was a little in awe of me and although I assured him that he must not be, I did like that in him. I told Lord Melbourne that it showed a modesty that was most becoming.

“He is not entirely German,” said Lord M. “Therefore he lacks Teutonic arrogance.”

“Lord M,” I said, “I do not think you like the Germans.”

“Oh,” he replied airily, “it is a mistake to generalize. There might be some very pleasant Germans… but perhaps not so many pleasant people as one would find in other nations.”

“In England, I suppose,” I said ironically. “Gentlemen like Sir John Conroy or Sir Robert Peel.”

“You slander the right honorable gentleman to speak of him in the same breath with that other…”

“Reptile,” I finished. “But you must admit that he is at least not a German.”

I laughed with him and continued to enjoy the company of the visitors. I was joining in their games, laughing as loudly as they did and I was on the most familiar terms with them, but Alexander remained the one I liked because he was more serious and I think a little in love with me.

As usual these visits were all too brief. I went down to Woolwich to see them off and actually went on board the ship which was to take them away. There were so many sighs and regrets, so many promises to come again. Then I stood waving while the ship sailed away and the band played “God Save the Queen.”

At our next meeting I detected a certain relief in Lord Melbourne's face and I said, “I believe you are glad the cousins have gone. Confess. You did not like them.”

I was rather pleased because I thought the reason he did not like them was because they had taken my attention from him; also to watch them riding and leaping, running and performing the dances of their country had made him feel old and tired.

“Children must play games,” he said.

“So they seemed childish to you?”

“They are perhaps a little young for their years.”

“I enjoyed the romps.”

He smiled a little sadly and that made me thoughtful.

I looked afresh upon this man whom I loved so dearly. He was very handsome with those wonderful blue-gray eyes which were fringed with dark lashes, such expressive eyes, which so often had filled with tears, indicating his tenderness for me. And I thought of all the talk of marriage and the uneasiness of the political situation, and the horrible fear that he might be thrown out of office which would mean that we should see little of each other, for a Tory minister would never allow the Queen to be on friendly terms with the Leader of the Opposition. I pondered on this and thought how unpredictable life could be and it was foolish to imagine one could go on in the same way for ever.

I said on impulse, “Lord Melbourne, I want you to have a portrait
painted. I shall hang it in my sitting room and then I shall always be able to look at you even when you are absent.”

He was deeply touched and with tears in his eyes said that although sitting for a portrait was not his idea of the best way of passing time, he would gladly endure the ordeal if it was my wish.

“Oh, it will not be so bad,” I told him. “I will come and watch the work in progress.”

“That will be a great inducement.”

“I daresay Dashy would like to come, too. You know how fond he is of you.”

“Then I shall be assured of good company.”

I was not going to let the matter be forgotten and engaged Sir William Charles Ross to paint the portrait, which I insisted should be done at the Palace.

I enjoyed the sittings far more than Lord Melbourne did. I could sense that he was somewhat restive. I sat with him and Dashy came and watched the progress with an interest that amused us all and sent me into gusts of laughter.

It was the best way of forgetting all that unpleasantness through which I had recently passed, and living in the moment, which was so amusing.

When the portrait was finished, I was not altogether pleased with it. It was like Lord Melbourne, but not nearly as good-looking as the original.

When I mentioned this to Lord Melbourne he said, “Oh Ross always likes to make his sitters look worse than they are. He thinks it is such fun.”

“I do not,” I said. “I like to see people as they are.”

“An artist will talk about seeing through an artist's eyes.”

“Well, if an artist cannot see what is there, his eyes need attending to.”

“Your Majesty is as ever the Mistress of Logic.”

I hung up the picture, and even if it was not entirely true to life, at least it was pleasant; and I did feel it would be comforting to have it there … forever.

U
NCLE LEOPOLD MUST
have been rather disturbed by my letter for I had one from him which said that he intended to pay me a short visit. When he said short he meant very brief indeed.

He intended to leave Ostend overnight and I was to be in Brighton where he could join me for a few hours, talk to me and then return.

The idea of traveling to Brighton did not appeal to me. Moreover I distrusted this idea of a few hours. I thought I might be pressed into making some agreement which I did not wish for. If anything was suggested I wanted time to talk it over with Lord Melbourne.

So I wrote back and said I could not be in Brighton for I had so many duties in London. He knew what a trying time I had passed through recently for he was fully aware of what was going on in England.

He must make it a proper visit. Let him come to Windsor. I should be so delighted to entertain him there.

I think he was a little put out because in the past I had immediately fallen in with his suggestions.

However, I guess he was very disturbed by what I had said about Albert; and he agreed to make arrangements for a visit to Windsor.

I was as excited as ever at the prospect of seeing him. I had forgotten those little differences we had had. What were they in a lifetime of devotion! Of course Uncle Leopold must act in a way which would be advantageous to Belgium. Of course he must rally as many friends as he could. It was only natural that he should ask for my help if I could give it.

When he, with Aunt Louise, arrived, I was waiting to greet them. I ran into Uncle Leopold's arms and he embraced me warmly.

“Still the same dear child,” he said.

“I am twenty now, Uncle Leopold.”

“Yes…yes…growing up.”

And there was Aunt Louise, looking much older, not the lighthearted young woman I had known when she was first married to Uncle Leopold.

I spent a great deal of time with him for he was with us for only a few days. There was, he said, so much to talk about; and the theme of his conversation was Albert.

He was surprised, he said, at my attitude to marriage.

I replied that I thought my attitude to marriage was quite normal.

“I mean your own marriage. You seem to avoid all thought of it.”

“Oh no, Uncle. It is just that I am young as yet and there seems no immediate need for it.”

“My dear child, as you have said, you are twenty years of age. That could be quite mature. You are certainly ready for marriage. A monarch
has duties toward the State. You have to give the country heirs. Do you realize that your uncle, the Duke of Cumberland, the King of Hanover, is waiting to pounce?”

“He has always been the bogeyman. I used to be terrified of him when I was young. I thought he was a horrible one-eyed monster, a Cyclops.”

“Nor were you far wrong. He is just waiting now, as he always has been, to seize the crown.”