Violet Chain (11 page)

“I don’t think I ever saw your bedroom in the light, it’s very nice.”

“Thank you.” My bedroom was like any other bedroom: a king-sized bed with matching dressers and a nightstand, nothing special. I walked to the bathroom, grabbing a towel, wiping the sweat from my face, then turned the water on in the bathtub, then walked to the door of the bathroom, leaning against it. Violet was checking out my bedroom and I have to say it was quite a view, watching her naked hips sway from side to side as she walked around.

“I was going to take a bath, would you like to join me?” I called out to her. She turned to face me and that view was even better.

“You bathe? I thought only women bathed,” she responded.

“I like a bath once in a while, it relaxes me. So what do you say?”

“Sure,” she answered as she walked over to me. We sat on the edge of the bathtub, waiting for it to fill up.

“So how is your project going?” That was a dumb question, but I was never good at small talk.

“It’s exhausting, but we are getting through it.”

“And Harrison?” Why did that just come out of my mouth?

“Harrison, why would you ask about him?” I was asking myself the same thing. Way to put your foot in your mouth, jackass.

“Just wondering how you two are getting along.”

“We’re not. Harrison and I are over, there is nothing between us, Chain.” That was music to my ears.

I smiled then stood up and turned off the water and slid into the tub. I gestured to her and she stepped inside. As she sat down I reached for her, pulling her back into my chest. I grabbed a washcloth and body wash. I dipped the washcloth into the water then doused it with body wash.

“So tell me about Violet,” I said as I took the washcloth and slid it across her shoulders.

“Not much to tell, I don’t have an interesting life like you, Chain,” she responded.

“Interesting, you think my life is interesting?” I said as I turned her to face me.

“Sure, you’re Chain Alexander, millionaire playboy,” she answered. I dipped the washcloth into the tub water and slid it down her breasts, then washed her stomach. She leaned back, lifting her leg, and I slid the washcloth across it.

“Where did you hear that?” I asked her as she lifted her other leg and I washed it.

“It’s all over the internet.”

“You checked me out?”

“Of course, I’m sure you checked me out too.” She was right, I did.  She took the washcloth from my hand and began washing me.

“The internet is nothing but lies, Violet, I am not the person they like to portray me to be.”

“Then who are you?” I reached for her and pulled her close.

“Chain—I’m just Chain.” She smiled at my comment.

After we bathed, we wrapped ourselves in large towels and walked into the bedroom, lying on the bed. I grabbed one of my t-shirts for Violet and slid it over her head, then lay back down next to her. I flicked on the television and Violet laid her head on my chest. Now this was contentment at its best, just the two of us, lying in my bed, cuddling close. It was the first time I felt like a normal couple. She fell asleep almost immediately. I took a moment to really look at her. She slept so quietly, she looked heavenly, and her lips pursed out like she was ready for a kiss. I was tempted to give her just that, but I didn’t want to wake her.

I flicked off the television and covered us up with the blanket, then curled my arms around her, pulling her close. The warmth of her body lulled me into a drowsy state and I soon drifted off to sleep.

***

The hospital was quiet that night as I held my baby sister’s tiny hand in mine. She was just five years old and struggling for her life. A ventilator was used to help her breathe and they had tubes coming out of every part of her frail body. I swore she squeezed my hand before the alarms went off and the nurses and doctors rushed into the room. They tried for what seemed hours, but was only minutes, to revive her, but it was useless, she was gone.

My father held her first, saying his goodbyes, then gently placed her in my arms.  I held her in my arms, cradling her tight to my chest, trying so hard to remember every line in her face, the scent of her hair, the touch of her skin. When my minutes were up, the nurse walked back into the room, taking her out of my arms and leaving the room. I sat silently sobbing, before making my way out of the hospital.

I drove to the towing yard. I had to see the car. As I stood near the wreckage, the one that had claimed the lives of my mother and sister, I cried. The charred metal that remained of the car was so twisted, it resembled a large pretzel. What they must have gone through in their last moments, the fear and the torture, knowing they were going to die. I circled the pile of twisted metal, looking for something to claim, something to remember their last minutes by. Then I saw it, my sister’s blanket, her safety net. My first thought, how could they just leave it in there? Something so special and such a big part of her. I reached inside, grabbing the green silk material, rubbing it against my face as I collapsed to the ground.

The gentle caress of a hand against my cheek woke me from my sleep and my eyes shot opened. Sweat was streaming down my face, tears in my eyes. My mind was so disoriented from my dream, it took a few minutes to recognize that the beautiful face to my side was Violet.

The silent communication in her eyes, the stillness of her body told me she knew I was hurting.

Her hand cupped the nape of my neck. “It’s okay, I’m here—I’m here,” she whispered as she kissed each tear on my cheek.

She
slanted her mouth to capture mine and kissed me slowly as her hand curled around my body, pulling me against hers. I drew a breath and held it as her lips caressed my neck.

I was falling.

Deeply.

Unconditionally.

In love with her.

A chill swept across me as the warmth of her body left mine and she sat up, sliding off the t-shirt I had given her to wear to bed, then slid on top of me. Her deft fingers slipped beneath the waistband of my boxers, light kisses raining from her lips against my skin as she moved down my body, sliding my boxers off and throwing them to the side. She reached to the nightstand to grab a condom, when my hand stopped hers. I wanted to feel all of her—bare.

Her eyes blinked hard as I flipped her over and slid on top of her.

As our sleek bodies moved feverishly against each other, I held her tight, wanting to remember the smell of her hair, the touch of her skin, the taste of her lips. This was where I wanted to be, this was where I belonged, buried inside of her.

As we found our release together, her body fell limp against mine and I wrapped my arms around her, never wanting to let her go. I raised my head to look down at her and could see tears forming in her eyes and I knew for that moment, she was completely mine and I was hers. And I knew I was ruined, I would never feel the same way about another woman as I felt about Violet.  I kissed her softly on the lips.

“Are you okay?” I asked her.

“Yeah,” she sniffled. I moved from on top of her to her side, facing her.

I brushed the hair from her forehead and gave her a quick kiss. “I’m sorry I woke you.”

She rested her hands on my shoulders. “It’s fine, Chain, do you want to tell me about it?” I turned and looked up at the ceiling. I knew what she was asking about, it was about my dream. I never talked about the tragedy of what happened to my family. I told David that my sister and mother were killed in a car accident, but never went into detail. It was a secret I had kept locked up inside, a secret I never wanted to reveal to anyone. I felt her hands on my cheeks as she turned my face to look at her.

“You can trust me,” she said in a hushed voice. I did trust her, with everything in me. I cleared my throat.

“I was only seventeen when it happened. I was out with my girlfriend at the time when I got the call.  My mother and sister had been in a car accident and my mother had died at the scene. My sister…” My words trailed off as my emotions began to get the best of me.

“It’s okay, if it hurts too badly, you don’t have to tell me.”

“I want to tell you, Violet.” I needed to tell her. “My sister was only five years old and she had survived the initial impact, but died soon after.”

A shocked looked spread across her face. “What happened?”

“A car side swiped them.”

“Was your mother driving?”

“No, my father was.”

“Did you father pass too?”

“No, he survived.”

“Where is he?”

“In Ohio.”

“Do you talk to him often?” Violet asked.

“No,” I said abruptly.

“Why not?”

I squeezed my eyes closed painfully. “Please, Violet. I really don’t want to talk about him.”

She rubbed my arm gently. “Okay, we don’t have to. So tell me about your sister.”

I smiled as I thought about Carena. “She was like any normal five-year-old, happy.” I reached inside of the pillow under my head, taking her blanket out. “This was hers, this blanket never left her. This was her life, her security. Whenever my mother washed it, she would cry the whole time till it was back in her arms again.” I paused as my emotions began to overwhelm me, tears streaming down my face. “When I came home from school, I would see her sitting by the door, holding her blanket, waiting for me. I remember her eyes would light up when I walked up to the door. I would pick her up and she would hug me so tight and it was the most amazing feeling.” Violet’s hands brushed across my cheeks and I turned to face her. “I don’t understand, Violet, how could God take such an innocent little girl?”

“I wish I could answer that, but things happen for no good reason at all… The statue at the mall, you made that for her.”

“Yeah, she loved cartoons. She would watch them for hours. I wanted some way of letting the world know she was here. She was so young when she passed, she didn’t even have a chance to make her mark on the world. I needed her to be remembered so I designed the statues and made sure they were displayed at every one of my malls.”

Tears welled up in her eyes. “You’re a wonderful man, Chain Alexander.” After losing my mother and sister, I never wanted to get close to a female again, until I met Violet. She seemed to bring out all that was good in me.

She placed a kiss on my lips, then cradled me close to her chest and I melted into her arms, drifting off to sleep.

When I woke, I could see light filtering through the side of the dark blue curtains draped across the bedroom window, indicating to me it was morning. I glanced down at Chain, his head resting comfortably between my breasts, his arms wrapped around me like he was holding his favorite teddy bear, secure yet gentle. The only sound in the room was the whisper of his breath as it released from his slightly parted lips.

I rubbed my forehead as confusion filled my head. What the hell was I doing? This was supposed to be about sex and that was it. I let my guard down for one second and now here he was lying in my arms, holding on to me like a security blanket, bringing a
sudden rush of guilt and responsibility to me. I never meant this to get out of hand, to go farther than what it was supposed to be, but I slipped up. How could I let that happen?
I was so stupid.

A smile crept across my face as the memory of the night before flooded my mind. He had opened up to me completely when telling the tragic tale of his mother’s and sister’s untimely deaths. He held nothing back, revealing his deepest emotions, even crying as he told the story.

Harrison never revealed his feelings, the only time I ever heard or saw him shed one tear was when he knew he had lost me and that was only because he was losing something, not because he was losing me. But with Chain his sadness was real, his hurt coming straight from his heart.

Was it wrong for me to want to take the hurt away, to shelter him from the pain of his past? Was it normal in a relationship like ours, to feel this way?

Of course it wasn’t. Again…what was I doing?

I picked his head up and carefully replaced my chest with a pillow and slid out of bed. Dressing quickly, I quietly left.

On the drive home, I scolded myself for breaking my own rule.
No staying the night!
I had crossed the line more than once last night. I bathed with him—intimacy. I held him as he told me about his past—intimacy. But the worst part was I really wanted to be there for him, because I cared.
Cared. Crap.
What did I get myself into? I had to stop this. But I didn’t want to, I loved being with Chain.
I loved?
  Ugh. How did that word creep into my thoughts?

I showered, hoping to clear my mind, but I was still so confused. I really needed to talk to someone, so I decided to drive over to Callie’s. If anyone could help me sort through my confusing thoughts, it would be Callie.

I parked near the curb in front of Callie’s house and walked up to the door. I rang the doorbell and I could tell by her expression as she opened the door that she was surprised to see me.

She batted her eyelashes. “Violet, what are you doing here?”

I frowned as I looked up at her. “I need to talk to you, is this a bad time?”

She pushed the door open widely. “It’s never a bad time for you. Come in.”

I stepped inside and quickly slipped out of my shoes.

“David’s not here, is he?” I asked her as we walked into the living room.

She placed a towel across the white couch before we sat. “No, he’s not…so tell me what’s wrong.”

I sat up straight, with my hands on my lap, and swiveled my body so I was facing her. “I’ve been seeing this guy.”

Her eyes lit up. “You’re dating some guy!  Violet, this is great, how long have you been seeing him?”

“Two or three weeks,” I mumbled.

A displeased look flashed across her face. “You have been dating a guy for two or three weeks and you’re just telling me about him now?”

“Technically what we are doing I wouldn’t consider dating.”

Her eyelashes fluttered as she considered what I was saying. “You’re really confusing me, Violet, you said you’re seeing some guy, but you’re not dating? I don’t get it.”

I was a little hesitant to answer—how do you tell your best friend that you have been carrying on with a man just for sex? I guess there was no easy way to tell her, so I just blurted it out. “We kind of just hook up for sex, that’s all.”

She feigned shock. “You, Violet Townsend, hook up with a man just for sex? I can’t believe it!”

Her comment made me feel suddenly ashamed.  “I know, I’m such a slut!”

She laughed. “You’re not a slut, Violet. A slut is someone who has sex with a lot of different men.” She paused before saying, “You are just having sex with one man, right?”

I was appalled by her accusation, what kind of girl did she think I was? “What do you think?” I snapped.

“I was just asking, jeez, don’t get so defensive!” she exclaimed.

I calmed. “Sorry, I’m just feeling a little edgy.”

She tapped her hand on my shoulder. “Don’t worry about it.” She shifted in her seat, sliding her legs underneath her. “So what’s the problem?”

“I don’t know. Everything was great at first, we would hook up, no strings attached. He got what he wanted, I got what I wanted. But now it’s becoming complicated.”

“What do you mean,
complicated
?”

I cupped my forehead as I leaned my elbow on the arm of the couch. “I think I may have crossed the line and now I don’t know if we can go back to just sex.”

“Why, what did you do?”

“I broke my own rule and spent the night with him and liked it. And it wasn’t because of sex, it was because I wanted to be with him.”

She laughed loudly. “So what you’re saying is that you really like this guy.”

“I think so.”

“Does he feel the same way?”

“He acts like it.”

“So let me get this straight. You are telling me that you are upset because you actually like the man you are currently having sex with and he likes you?” she questioned as she stood up and walked to the kitchen. I followed her. She reached into the fridge and pulled out a pitcher of iced tea.

I leaned against the counter, folding my arms. “Well yeah, I guess that’s what I’m saying.”

She opened the cabinet and took two glasses out, filled them with iced tea from the pitcher, then placed a glass in front of me as she rested her arms on the counter beside me. “Look, Violet, it’s not a crime to like someone that you’re sleeping with. Actually, I think it’s kind of normal. I really think you are making a big deal out of nothing. If you want my advice, I think you should relax and go with it.”

I let a breath slip from my mouth, before mumbling, “I don’t know if I want to
go with it
.”

She stood up and took a sip from her glass. “You have been sleeping with this guy for weeks, it’s obvious you like being with him. What is the big deal? What are you so afraid of?”

What was I afraid of? Everything. Him, me—us.  Mostly, it was the idea of falling for a man and being hurt again.

My thoughts must have showed in my expression, because Callie rubbed my arm gently, before saying, “Harrison sure did a number on you, didn’t he?”

Up until now, I didn’t realize how badly I had been affected by what Harrison did. Sure, the initial impact of him cheating was devastating and I felt I would never get through it, but I did and I thought I was over it but it was obvious I wasn’t.

“I suppose you could say that,” I muttered.

She shook her finger at me. “Violet, you cannot live your life afraid someone is going to hurt you because of what your asshole ex-boyfriend did. Not all men are like Harrison.”

“But what if they are?” I questioned.

“Trust me, they’re not. If this man makes you happy, then I say go for it. He does make you happy?”

“I don’t know. I enjoy being with him, if that’s what you’re asking.”

“Isn’t that the same thing?” Was it? My head was beginning to hurt from all the thinking. I rubbed my temples gently with my fingers.

“So tell me, what’s his name? Where did you two meet?” she queried.

I almost slipped up and told Callie Chain’s name, but I still wasn’t sure what would happen between me and him, so I decided to keep his identity to myself.

The way Callie was looking at me though, I knew she wasn’t going to let me get out of telling her about him completely.

So I did what anyone would do in a pressure situation—I lied. “His name is Corey, I met him in the produce section, at the grocery store.”

She lifted a brow. “You met a man in the grocery store?”

“Yeah, I was looking at the red peppers and I wasn’t sure if they were sweet or hot, so I asked him. One thing led to another and we ended up back at his place.” That was so bad even I couldn’t believe the story.

She blinked hard before saying, “I can see where that can be a complete turn-on.” I watched as she bit her lip, trying to stifle a laugh, but unable to. We both broke out in laughter and she walked to the fridge, placing the pitcher inside.

“Violet, you crack me up,” Callie uttered as she shook her head.

As our laughter died down, I turned to her. “So where is David?”

“He’s with Chain, they had to meet with a contractor at their new office this morning.” She glanced at the watch on her wrist. “They should be here pretty soon.”

I definitely did not want to see Chain now. I had three good reasons why.  One, I was still confused about how I felt, two, I wasn’t sure how he felt about me leaving without saying goodbye this morning and three, the most important reason, I was a complete mess. I had taken a quick shower, barely ran a brush through my hair and didn’t have one speck of makeup on.

I downed the rest of my iced tea and walked to the sink, rinsing the glass out, placing it down.  “I’m going to get going,” I said to Callie as I wiped my hands on a dish towel.

She grabbed my arm as I turned to walk away. “What’s your rush? Why don’t you stay and hang out? We can go to lunch.”

I smiled. “I have stuff to do, maybe another time.”

She shrugged her shoulders. “Alright.”

She walked me to the front door and as I went to grab the doorknob, the door opened and in walked David and Chain.

I glanced at Chain and he winked. “Violet, so nice to see you again.” I felt the flutter of butterflies in my stomach.

“Nice to see you too, Chain,” I mumbled. He slid his shoes off as Callie curled her arm through David’s and glanced down at the bag he was clutching.

“What is that?” Callie asked nosily. He reached into the bag and took out a shoe box.

“Remember when we were shopping and you fell in love with those navy shoes and were disappointed that they were out of stock?” David asked her.

She grinned and I could see the excitement in her eyes. “Yeah.”

“Well I ordered them and they just came in,” he responded as he handed her the box. She squealed as she wrapped her arms around his neck, the box hanging from her hand.

“I love you,” Callie said as she kissed David on the lips.

“I love you more,” David responded as he pulled her closer.

Chain chuckled, shaking his head. “Before you two get started, why don’t you take it somewhere private?” Callie released her arms from around David.

“That’s a good idea. I have this dress that I think will match these shoes perfectly. Come on, David,” Callie said as she reached for his hand, but David backed away.

“No way, Callie, I am not spending hours watching you change from dress to dress, shoe to shoe.”

She placed her hands firmly on her hips. “You don’t like watching me undress?”

“Of course I do, but only when we’re getting ready for bed,” he said, wriggling his eyebrows.

Callie rolled her eyes. “You’re such a pig.”

He grinned. “I’m a man, what do you expect, right, Chain?” he said as he brushed his shoulder against Chain’s.

Chain threw his hands up. “Keep me out of this, David.”

Callie grabbed David’s hand and yanked him towards her. “Now come on!”

David grunted as they walked away.

As soon as they were out of sight, Chain moved closer to me, placing a soft kiss on my lips. “I missed you this morning.”

I gave him a wry smile. “I didn’t want to wake you, you looked so comfortable all cuddled up and cute.”

He tucked a loose strand of hair behind my ear. “Only because you were there. That was the first time I slept over eight hours since I can remember. You bring peace to me, Violet, a comfort I have never felt with anyone else.”

I felt that tug at my heart again. The things this man said were sometimes so overwhelming sweet. I could have easily melted into his arms. But this was definitely not a good time to do that.

“I really have to go.” I reached for the doorknob and his hand covered mine. I could feel the warmth of his breath ghost down my neck as he stood behind me, his face pressed in my hair.

“Why are you running from me?” he murmured against my hair.

I turned to face him. “I’m not running from you, I really have things I have to take care of at home.”

“Are you sure?” he asked, pulling me in with that intense gaze he had. I looked down and away from him.

“I’m sure…look, I really have to go.” Before he could pull me in again, I flung the door opened and walked out.