Vulnerable: (McIntyre Security Bodyguard Series - Book 1) (19 page)

“Put your hands down, sweetheart,” he said, gently tugging her hands down to her sides. “There’s no need to hide your body from me.”

She dropped her arms and looked away, hating the feeling of being on display. She could just imagine what he must be thinking. Of course, it was natural that he would compare her to the other women he’d been with. She closed her eyes.

Beth shivered when she felt Shane’s finger trace the shape of her collar bone, from her left shoulder across to her right.

“Are you cold?” he asked.

“No.”

“Open your eyes, Beth, and look at me,” he said quietly.

She shook her head.

His finger moved slowly down the center of her chest, following the valley between her breasts, down to her belly button, where it traced a lazy circle around the little indentation. “I wish you could see yourself the way I see you,” he said. “There isn’t a single thing about you that I would change. You’re perfect.”

Beth’s eyes remained resolutely closed as his finger trailed back up her abdomen. His hand covered her left breast. “Your heart is pounding. So is mine. Here, feel.”

He placed her hand over his heart so she could feel its rapid beat. “See? You’re not the only one affected here,” he said. “Feel what you do to me.”

Beth opened her eyes and met his gaze, stunned by the mix of sincerity and hunger she saw in his eyes.

“You have the most beautiful skin I’ve ever seen,” he said almost reverently, as he traced the meandering path of a fine blue vein down to her left breast. “It’s almost translucent.” His index finger slowly made its way to her nipple, where it made a circle around her dusky pink areola. Her nipple puckered instantly, and she trembled.

He teased the tight little bud, brushing it lightly with the pad of his finger. Then he leaned forward and sucked her nipple into his mouth. When his lips closed over the plush pink tip and he sucked on her flesh, she felt a corresponding tug low in her belly. A liquid warmth swept through her in response to his wet pulls on her nipple. She grabbed his shoulders to steady herself.

As Shane continued to suckle her, his hands pulled her panties past the curves of her buttocks and down her long legs. When he released her breast and pulled back to look at her, she swayed toward him, and he caught her. He studied her body with blatant interest, finally reaching down and sifting a fingertip through the tuft of blond curls between her legs. He pressed the tip of his finger between her plump lips and found what he was looking for.

At the feel of his fingertip circling her slick clitoris, she jumped.

“I want you in my bed,” he said in a hoarse voice. He scooted back on the bed, leaning against the headboard to make room for her. He sat watching her, waiting for her to take that last step.

She stood there trembling, wishing he hadn’t left the decision up to her.

He opened the top drawer of the nightstand on his side of the bed and pulled out a strip of condoms, which he set on top of the stand. He smiled at her. “I’ve been imagining you here in my bed for days now.”

She took in the sight of him, the taut surfaces of his body, the ridges and planes of his tanned, firm body. His erection stood straight up as if beckoning her. His suggestion that she be on top came back to her, and she couldn’t help imagining herself climbing on top of him and straddling his hips, taking his erection into her body. Her belly quivered at the thought. Everything she wanted was right there in front of her, if only she had the courage to reach out and take it.

Shane patted the mattress. She clambered onto the high bed, feeling far from graceful, and knelt beside him. He reached behind her head to free her hair, letting it fall past her shoulders in soft, loose waves. He fingered her hair as it settled around her shoulders.

“I’ve wanted you since the first night I saw you at Clancy’s. I haven’t been able to think about much else,” he admitted. “I’ve had a hell of a time concentrating at work. My coworkers all think I’ve lost my mind.”

“I wanted to call you that first night,” she admitted, looking at him. “I couldn’t sleep for thinking about it. Every time I closed my eyes I saw you.”

“I didn’t sleep much that night either.” He tucked a strand of her hair behind her ear. “And I hope not to sleep much tonight, either.”

He held out his hand, silently beseeching her to take it. He was going to make her choose, she realized. She felt a cool draft of air on her bare skin, and she longed to press up against him and share in the warmth of his body.

She reached out and took his hand, and he gently pulled her close, laying her down beside him on the bed. Holding her gaze, he leaned over her and lowered his mouth to hers, his lips gently settling on hers. He took his time kissing her, letting her get used to the feel of his mouth on hers. He coaxed her, tasted her. He let her taste him. His soft, firm lips eased hers open, and his tongue slipped inside, finding hers and gently stroking it.

“God, I want you,” he groaned into her mouth.

Her hands came up and gripped his biceps, her fingers flexing on his muscles. She was shocked to realize he was shaking, too.

“Are you sure?” he said.

She squeezed his arms, loving the rock hard feel of his muscles beneath her fingers. “I want this.”

Chapter 17

Take it slow. Keep it light. And for God’s sake, don’t scare her.
The words were a mantra playing over and over in Shane’s head. His balls had been aching for the better part of a week, and his cock was so hard at the moment it was well past the point of pain.

He wanted desperately to spread her legs and sink balls deep inside her and ride her until he couldn’t remember his own name. But he sure as hell couldn’t do that. It was imperative that he get their first night together right. He wanted her to feel comfortable with him. He wanted her to feel safe. Damn it, he wanted her to want him as badly as he wanted her.

His mouth dipped down to hers once more, unable to resist kissing her. Her mouth was like heaven, silky and sweet, and he couldn’t get enough. When she opened her mouth to him, he slipped his tongue inside and explored every inch. The soft little sounds she made when his tongue stroked hers ratcheted him up that much higher. He honestly didn’t know how much more he could take. The past week had been one long, extended session of foreplay. He wrapped her in his arms and held her against him, reveling in the feel of her soft breasts pressed against his chest.

All he could think about now was getting inside her. He’d be careful. He knew that taking his cock could be a challenge, so he’d give her time to get adjusted to him. He nudged her legs apart with his knee and slipped one hand between her thighs. He gently drew his finger up the seam of her sex, skimming through her blond curls. Her entire body trembled when his finger sunk in, dipping into her hot core.

“God, you’re so wet,” he groaned. Realizing how wet she was made his cock just that much harder, and the ache just that much worse. He could smell her arousal now, hot and earthy, and he had to taste her. He wanted her scent, her taste on his tongue. He scooted down her torso, his hands grasping her thighs and pushing them gently apart as he made room to settle between them.

“Shane?”

Her voice was barely audible over the roaring in his ears. Still, he picked up on the uncertainty in her tone. “Shh, it’s okay,” he said. “Just relax.”

His tongue swiped along the seam of her folds, pushing past her swollen tissues, and he groaned when the taste of her hit his tongue. She was warm and wet, her earthy scent like an aphrodisiac. His tongue lashed her clitoris, and he was determined to drive her as crazy as he himself felt. When he latched onto her clit with his lips, her hips bowed up off the bed.

Laying one arm across her belly to keep her still, he used his free hand to stroke her between her legs. She gasped, and then her fingers were in his hair, tugging the strands with urgent desperation. His long index finger gently pushed its way into her core, stroking the front wall of her channel.

He could tell she was close to coming, as she panted and made loud, keening sounds. He could see her abdomen rising and falling as she tried to catch her breath.

“Shane!” she gasped, pulling hard on his hair. She stiffened under him, her body bucking wildly as she cried out.

The force of her orgasm sent him into sheer overdrive. His mouth covered hers hungrily, and he drank in her sweet cries. Now all he could think about was getting inside her. He rose up over her, looming above her. Her eyes were closed tightly, and she whimpered through the residual waves of her orgasm.

He wedged his hips into the open vee of her thighs and rocked himself against her heat, coating his cock with her wetness. He was desperate to feel her wet heat surrounding him, squeezing him, drawing him deep inside.

Condom!
Damn it, he needed a condom!

As he reached for a condom, he felt the first weak blow against his chest. He was so completely wrapped up in the demands of his body that it took him a moment to register the fact that she was pushing against his shoulders.

He glanced at her face, shocked at the utter panic he saw in her wide eyes. She shoved frantically at his shoulders, but he was too heavy for her to move. His brain started to come back online when he saw the tears streaming down her cheeks.
Fuck!

“Beth?”

“No! No no no no no!” she wailed, pushing in vain to dislodge him. “Get off of me! Get off! Get off!”

He rolled off her, and she scrambled off the bed in a frenzy, crouching beside the bed as if to hide her naked body from him.

“Shit, Beth, I’m sorry!” He moved in her direction, but she scooted back blindly, falling on her bottom. Then she lunged to her feet and turned to run.

“Sweetheart, wait!” He went after her, but she turned back to face him and held up her hands beseechingly, as if to ward him off.

“No!” she sobbed, tears flowing freely now as she backed away from him. “I can’t! I’m sorry! I can’t do this!” She kept moving back, putting more and more distance between them. “I have to go now. I have to go!”

The pain of seeing her cringe from him was like a knife twisting in his gut. He’d done this to her! He’d fucking done this! How could he have been so careless?

He slowed his movements and approached her cautiously. “Easy, Beth,” he said, his voice low and even. He held out one hand to her. “It’s okay, sweetheart.”

“It’s not okay!” she cried. She hit the back of the sofa and couldn’t go any farther. Tears streamed down her face as she was wracked with sobs. “I can’t do this, Shane. I can’t!”

“You don’t have to, baby.” Her pleading gutted him. That and the searing guilt that choked him was more than he could bear. He sank to his knees in front of her, utterly devastated by what he’d done to her. To see such a beautiful, vibrant young woman reduced to begging shook him to the core. Someone had once taken her free will and left her bound and gagged on a dirt floor. He thought of that innocent little girl who’d lain scared and alone in the dark for so many hours, and he felt sick.

Shane bowed his head, wondering how the hell he could have messed up so badly. When he finally looked up at her again, he found her standing frozen in place, visibly shaking, her wide eyes wet with tears. She looked like she was about to collapse any moment. He went back for his discarded shirt and held it out to her as a peace offering.

“Let me put this on you, baby. Please. You’re shaking.”

He took a few steps in her direction, and her hands came up to cover her breasts. In that moment, Shane wanted to fucking kill Howard Kline. He vowed there and then that, one way or another, he’d end that bastard for what he’d done to this girl.

The sobbing had stopped, but she was still shaking. “I shouldn’t have come.”

The despair in her voice broke his heart.

He moved closer, holding the shirt in front of him like a shield, and in some ways it was a shield. The last thing she needed right now was to see his flaccid dick.

“Let me cover you up, sweetheart,” he said, coaxing her. “You’re shaking.”

When he was within arm’s reach of her, he draped the shirt around her back and slipped her arms into the sleeves. His shirt was huge on her, the tails falling almost to her knees and the cuffs falling past her hands. He buttoned the shirt quickly, and then he rolled the cuffs up past her wrists.

“That’s better,” he said, moving to her side so he could put a comforting arm around her trembling shoulders. “Come sit down on the bed, before you fall down.”

He tried to lead her back to the bed, but when they got close, she pulled away from him and began frantically grabbing her clothes off the bench.

“What are you doing, Beth?”

“I’m getting dressed,” she said, her voice shaky. She started for the bathroom.

His brow furrowed. He knew she was distraught, and she had every right to be. But he couldn’t let her leave now, not like this. “Why are you getting dressed? You can wear my shirt.”

She looked back at him, her expression stricken. “I’m leaving. I’ll call a cab.”

Shane grabbed a pair of sweats out of a dresser drawer and hastily pulled them on, trying to think fast. If she left now, under these conditions, he might never see her again, and he couldn’t let that happen. “I thought you were sleeping over. It’s kind of late to be going home now.”

She looked at him like he was a complete dimwit. “I can’t do this, Shane,” she said, as if stating the obvious. “I’m sorry. I tried, but I can’t.”

“That was sex, Beth,” he said. “I’m talking about sleeping over. They’re two very different things.”

She frowned at him. “You want me to stay anyway? To sleep with you? Just sleep?”

“Yes.” He ran his fingers through his hair. “Please don’t leave. I won’t touch you, I promise. Just stay the night. I want to wake up with you in the morning, have breakfast with you. We can find something to do together tomorrow.”

Shane approached her slowly and took the clothes from her cold hands. He returned her clothes to the bench at the foot of the bed, and then he brought her hands to his mouth and kissed them. “I’m sorry, Beth.”