Waiting For Ethan (13 page)

T
he package is waiting on the steps the next day when I get home from work. I know it is from Neesha immediately. I recognize her handwriting on the label. It was always incredibly messy, and I see that it hasn't improved. If I didn't know better, I'd think her daughter or son addressed the package. My name slants upward in big, loopy letters, my street address slants downward, and the town and state are slanting both up and down, with an uneven amount of space between each letter.

I bend to pick up the box. I'm surprised by how light it is. Inside my apartment, I place the package on my table, thinking about what's inside. Ajee's ashes. I close my eyes and picture Ajee, her salt-and-pepper hair and those big dark eyes that saw things no one else could. I wonder if she foresaw how her own life would end. Saw her remains in an urn traveling halfway across the country. If she could see her own future, did she try to do things to change it?

If she had told me that Ethan would be going through a divorce when I met him, would I have waited? Certainly I would never be dating a man who was technically still married if Ajee hadn't told me I was supposed to marry him. In this way, knowing my fate is making my fate possible. This doesn't sit well with me.

I think about leaving the package as is until Neesha arrives next week, but I have second thoughts. It seems wrong to treat Ajee that way. Before I can decide what to do, my doorbell rings. Luci is supposed to pick me up at six thirty to go to the movies. Today at work, she won tickets to a screening by being the hundredth caller to a radio station. She tried calling at ten, noon, two, and finally won at four. In all, she must have called that radio station over a thousand times. If Cooper knew, he would remove the phones from our office to improve editing turnaround time. There would be no need to brainstorm ideas.

I open the door. A cold blast of wind practically rips it from the hinges. Luci's standing there in a long wool coat, hat, and gloves. It's the first week of April, and out of principle, I've already packed my winter clothes away for the season. “I was bored,” she says as she comes inside. I take her coat, and she wanders to the living room. “Sometimes don't you just wish there were someone here to greet you when you got home?” She plops herself down on the couch. I study her. Her usually bright green eyes look dull, like they're covered with a coat of dust.

I sit down next to her. “What's going on?”

“Kip, he . . .” She leaps to her feet. “I need a glass of wine.” She heads directly to my wine rack on the corner of the kitchen counter and pulls out a bottle of pinot noir she gave me for Christmas. “You don't mind if I open this?” She pulls the corkscrew from a kitchen drawer as she asks.

I get two glasses while she opens the wine. She pours us each a generous amount. “Here's to being single.” As she clinks her glass against mine, she notices the package on the table. “Did you get a gift?”

“No, it's Ajee's ashes.”

“What?” she asks.

I sigh because I've already told her a few times that Neesha is coming here next week to spread her grandmother's remains. I tell her again while she drains her wineglass.

“Get me scissors. Let's open up the package,” she instructs.

I go to my desk and return with scissors. I start to cut open the box, but I'm hesitant. I can't believe that all that's left of Ajee fits in this small box. My phone rings. I stop what I'm doing to answer it, glad for the interruption. It's Ethan. I go into the other room to talk to him. When I return, the box is open, and a cylinder-shaped object wrapped in multiple layers of Bubble Wrap rests next to my glass of wine on the table. “You do the honors,” Luci says.

I finish my wine before picking up the container. Under all the protective wrapping is a beautiful turquoise brass urn. I set it on the table and take a step backward.

Luci laughs. “She's not going to come to life and pop out of there.” She taps her knuckles against the urn, and they make a clanging sound. “This is beautiful.” She points to a gold trim circling the urn just under the cover. “Look at the details.”

I step closer and notice the trim is actually individual gold roses strung together. “Ajee loved roses,” I say. “She planted a rosebush in the Patels' yard as soon as she moved in.”

Luci places her fingers on the lid of the urn, and I quickly reach for it. “What are you doing?”

“Maybe if I open it, she'll come out like a genie and we'll each get to make three wishes.”

I remove the urn from her reach. “What would you wish for?”

“Easy. An endless supply of wishes, money, and hot lovers.” She carries our glasses to the sink to wash them while I struggle to recork the wine bottle.

 

When we return from the movie, Ethan's Jeep is parked behind my car. He steps onto the driveway and waves when we pull in. I had no idea he was coming over, and I'm excited that he's here.

“Is that Ethan?” Luci asks. “Did you know he was coming?”

I shake my head as Ethan opens the passenger door of Luci's car. “You sounded freaked out by the ashes,” he says. “I didn't want you to be alone with them.”

“Wow,” I say. “It was really thoughtful of you to drive up.”

“Please,” Luci mutters. “He just wants some action.”

Ethan leans into the car and looks at her. “Nothing wrong with that, is there?” He smiles.

Luci extends her hand. “Luci Corrigan Chin.” I give her a startled look. She never uses her maiden name.

“You two sure have been spending a lot of time together,” Ethan says.

“What do you mean?” Luci asks.

Oh no. “Thanks for tonight, Luci.” I lightly push Ethan so that I can get out of the car. He doesn't budge.

“Pizza last night. The movie tonight.”

Luci rolls her tongue across her upper lip. “Pizza last night,” she repeats slowly. She pokes my forearm. “That's some story that went with that pizza, too. Right, Gina?”

I glare at her. “What story?” Ethan asks.

“Oh,” Luci says. “I had my heart set on Thai. Gina had to talk me into having pizza. In fact, she owes me big for agreeing to the pizza. Right, Gina?”

I glare at her again. “Right, Luci.” I push Ethan away with more force. He finally moves back so that I can get out of the car. When I step on the driveway, he pulls me into his arms and kisses me on the lips; his tongue darts inside my mouth while his hands run up and down my body. Although I'm embarrassed he's groping me like this in front of Luci, my body responds the way it always does to his touch, and I can't wait to get upstairs. His hands land on my butt, and he pulls me closer.

“Take it upstairs,” Luci yells.

Ethan pulls away from me and leans back into Luci's car. I can't even look at her I'm so embarrassed. “I was thinking you, me, Gina, and my buddy Jack could all go out one night,” Ethan says.

“Just so happens I'm free tomorrow,” Luci answers.

 

The office smells like hot sauce when I arrive on Friday. Luci's sitting at her desk eating her eggs. “We have so much to talk about that I don't even know where to start,” she says. I hang up my coat—a light spring jacket even though there were flurries on the drive in today—and sit down. “Ethan is not what I was expecting.” She takes her breakfast to my desk and plants herself on the corner.

“What were you expecting?”

She puts a forkful of eggs into her mouth. She chews and swallows before speaking again. “Someone more refined. Someone a little bit shy about shoving his tongue down your throat and feeling you up in front of others.” She stops and pushes the eggs around on her plate with her fork. I feel my face burning with shame. “Someone who's been to the dentist in the past decade, for Pete's sake.”

“That's not nice.” I can't say it with much conviction. Ethan's teeth are horrible.

“Look,” Luci says, “I can see what his appeal would be. He's sort of sexy. At least until he opens his mouth. I think a fling with him is harmless, even good for you. But, Gina, he's not the guy for you long-term.”

I shake my head. “No one has ever affected me like he does.” I blush as I say it.

“There's a big difference between love and lust,” she says. “After a while, the sex will get old.”

I turn to face my monitor. Luci stays where she is, eating her eggs. “Who did you have dinner with Wednesday night?” Her breakfast is gone, and she tosses the plate into my garbage can.

“It's not what you think.”

“I don't think anything. I just want to know who you had dinner with.”

“Cooper and I need to get the project done. He has no time during the day.”

“So you and Cooper worked at dinner.” Luci uses air quotes around the word
worked
.

“Yes.” There's no way I'm going to tell her we didn't get any TechVisions business done.

Luci stands. “Then why did you tell Ethan you had dinner with me?”

“I told him I was with a friend from work. He assumed it was you. I didn't correct him.”

Luci walks to her desk while I'm speaking. She sits before responding. “Ask yourself why you didn't correct him.”

J
ack sticks out in the crowded bar because he's several inches taller than everyone and because his hair is bright red. He's standing beside a table talking to Ethan, who is slouching in the booth looking at his watch. We are seventy-five minutes late because I couldn't figure out what to wear. I finally settled on jeans, but we stopped along the way so Luci could pick out a new top for me. It's a silver tank top with sparkling red glitter. I'm wearing a red button-down sweater open over it.

I point out Ethan and Jack to Luci. She stares at Jack and makes a face like she just found out Santa Claus isn't real. “You didn't tell me he's a ginger.”

I tousle her own red locks. “I didn't tell you anything about Jack. You're the one who agreed to meet him.” All day, I've been worried about this get-together. I don't know what I'm afraid of. I just know it's not a good idea.

Luci pushes her way through the mob. I follow in the path she clears. A guy who doesn't look like he's old enough to be here drinking, yet holds a fresh beverage in his hand, grabs her arm. “What's the rush?” he asks.

Luci eyes the dark liquid in the tall glass. “What are you drinking?”

“Long Island Iced Tea.”

Luci shakes her arm free. “Can I try?”

He hands her the drink. For a minute I'm afraid she's going to douse him with it. Instead she takes a large sip. “Delicious.” She slowly licks her lips and leans toward the guy's ear. “Mind if I keep it?” I've never heard her voice so low.

“Ahh, no. Of course not.” He smiles.

“Thanks.” She quickly turns away from him and continues pushing her way through the crowd.

He looks at me. I shrug.

When we reach the table, Ethan stands while Jack sits. “Finally,” Ethan says, leaning in to hug me. He smells like whiskey. “Jack here was just about to leave.”

“You're over an hour late,” Jack whines.

Luci eyes him. “I'm Luci, and I promise you, I'm well worth the wait.”

Jack's face turns the color of his hair as Luci slides into the booth next to him.

Ethan takes my hand. “Let's get you a drink,” he says, pulling me toward the bar. I don't want to leave Luci alone with Jack. I'm afraid she'll interrogate him about Ethan. That's it. Luci's going to find things out about Ethan tonight that I don't want to know.

I look back at our table. Jack's and Luci's heads are bent toward each other. He's listening to something she's saying. His face is very serious, without even a hint of a smile.
Please don't let there be a long line at the bar.

Ethan squeezes my hand. “Looks like they're getting along.”

“For now.” Luci will be nice to Jack just long enough to get the information she wants. What that information is, I don't know yet.

Four televisions at the bar are all tuned to a hockey game, and each TV has a deep crowd stationed in front of it. “Bruins winning?” Ethan asks a big bald guy.

“No score yet,” he answers.

Ethan watches the game while we work our way to the front of the line. I look back at our table again, but I can't see over the crowd behind me. Fifteen minutes later, we return to the booth with a pitcher of beer and two Long Island Iced Teas. “Just in time,” Luci says, sliding her empty glass to the edge of the table and pulling a fresh drink toward her.

“What were you guys talking about?” I ask.

Luci sucks on her straw for a minute. “Amber,” she says.

“The dog walker?”

“Yup,” Luci says. “She seems to have taken a particular liking to Brady.”

“Can't blame her,” Ethan says, staring at Jack. He stretches his arm across the back of the booth so that his hand rests just above my shoulder. “Her time with him is about to be cut in half, though. Leah and I agreed on joint custody today.”

I break out into a coughing fit as my sip goes down the wrong way. When I compose myself, I turn to Ethan. “You spoke with Leah?”

“We've agreed to make the divorce less contentious,” he says. “Sharing Brady is the first step.”

The barroom suddenly breaks out in applause. For a minute I think everyone is happy about Ethan and Leah getting along, but no, the Bruins have scored a goal. “You're so going to owe me,” Ethan says to Jack.

Jack glances at the television. “That's okay. Me betting against a Boston team is a sure way to guarantee they'll win.”

Luci laughs.

“How's this custody thing going to work?” I ask. “You and Leah live, like, four hours apart.”

“Closer to three. We're meeting in the middle. Sunday's the first drop-off.”

“Where are you meeting?”

Luci leans across the table, closer to me.

“A burger joint in Portsmouth that allows dogs.” Ethan shrugs. “Leah picked the place.”

“You're having lunch together?”

Luci grabs my wrist. “Gina, let's go to the ladies' room.”

“How often will these switches take place? Are you going to have a date every time?”

“It's not a date.”

Luci stands. “Ethan, get up so Gina can get out of the booth.” When he doesn't respond, Luci more forcefully adds, “Now.”

Ethan snaps to his feet. I bump his shoulder as I move past him.

He sits down again, and as we start to walk away I hear him say, “Women, man.”

Luci puts her arm around my shoulder. “Are you okay?”

“I'm fine.”

When we get to the restroom, she studies herself in the mirror. “Does our health insurance cover Botox?” She glides the tip of her finger across faint creases at the corners of each eye. “He's not ready for a serious relationship, Gina.” She places each hand at the outside edge of each eyebrow and pulls her skin toward her temples. “You never want to be the one who comes after the wife.”

“He's having lunch with Leah,” I say. “I really have no reason to be mad. If I were a good person, I'd be encouraging him to work things out.”

“You are a good person, and he's not going to work things out with her.”

I enter a stall, pull down my jeans, and crouch over the toilet seat. On the wall to the right is a red heart around the words
Megan Loves Luke
. Next to the heart in black writing is the message
Luke Loves Crystal
. Under that someone else has written
Love Sucks
.

I hear the clicking of heels, and then Luci's pointy black shoes appear outside the stall. “Divorce is tough,” she mumbles. “It can do a number on you.”

If I had a pen with me right now, I'd be tempted to write
Ethan Loves Leah
. I give up trying to go to the bathroom. My bladder gets paralyzed when I know other people can hear. I stand, pull up my jeans, and flush. I swing open the bathroom door, and Luci steps backward just before it hits her.

She enters the stall. I go to the sink to wash my hands. “I just don't want you to get hurt, Gina,” Luci says over the sound of her pee stream hitting the water in the toilet bowl. “Keep it casual.”

It's just awkward talking to someone who is going to the bathroom. “I'll see you back at the table.”

I pause in the hallway outside the restroom to collect myself. I think of Ajee and remember her insisting, “You must wait. You must wait for Ethan.” Why didn't he wait for me? Why did he love Leah first?

I head out of the hallway back to our table. Ethan stands as soon as he sees me. Before he lets me sit, he wraps me into a tight hug. “Gina, Leah and I are over. I promise. But she was such a huge part of my life for so long. I want our split to be amicable.”

“I know.” I'm thinking I will go back to the restroom with a marker and write:
Gina Hates Leah!

Luci returns and announces that she is hungry, so she and Jack head to the bar to order food. A few minutes later Jack returns by himself. He pouts as he sits. I glance to my left and see Luci perched on a stool. A bartender leans over the bar toward her, laughing at something she just said. She makes it look so easy.

“Striking out?” Ethan asks.

“She told me she doesn't do redheads.” Jack laughs. “She's something else. I think I'm in love.”

“She didn't really say that,” Ethan says, looking at me.

Jack and I both nod. “She did.” I didn't hear it, but I can certainly imagine it.

A few minutes later Luci returns with potato skins and mozzarella sticks. “What's wrong with redheads?” Ethan asks.

Luci laughs. “Hey, there can't be a ginger more beautiful than this one.” She points to herself. Jack laughs and drapes his arm around her. Luci lets it stay there for about three seconds. “So,” she says as she shakes his arm off, “how long have you known Ethan?”

“We met in sixth grade,” Jack says. “Some kids were picking on him on the basketball court, and I stepped in to stop them.”

“My hero,” Ethan says. “He's saved my ass countless times.” The two clank glasses as I imagine a distraught Ethan showing up on Jack's doorstep after Leah kicked him out.

“So, Jack, did you like Leah?” I don't even know where the question came from. Ethan turns to look at me. Luci kicks me.

Jack swallows his beer. “Yeah, Leah was cool.” He takes another gulp.

“She's still cool,” Ethan says. When Jack, Luci, and I all stare at him, he adds, “He made it sound like she died.”

Luci uses her fork to place a mozzarella stick on her plate. She cuts it into small bites. Jack reaches for the plate and picks one up with his hands. He stuffs the entire thing into his mouth. I know later tonight Luci will whisper to me about his atrocious table manners.

Ethan follows Jack's lead, picks up a potato skin, and downs it in two huge bites. “Did they not have silverware in the town where you two grew up?” Luci snaps.

“No silverware and no indoor plumbing. In fact, we lived in caves,” Jack answers. He turns ninety degrees so that he is facing Luci. “How about you, princess, was it only silver spoons in the kingdom you lived in?”

“No, we had forks and knives, and we learned how to use them,” Luci answers, but she's not even looking at him. She's staring at the bartender. He has a blond mustache and goatee. “I love facial hair,” she says.

Jack touches his clean-shaven cheek while looking down at the table. “How do you and Gina know each other?”

Luci looks at her watch before responding. “We work together.” She sighs and looks at her watch again.

This time Jack sees her do it. “We boring you?” he asks.

Luci nods. “Yeah, kind of.”

Ethan laughs. He raises his glass and tips it toward Luci. “I like you,” he says.

She glances at me and then back at Ethan. “Then do me a favor,” she says slowly. “Don't hurt my friend.”

Ethan puts his arm around my shoulder and pulls me toward him. “Never,” he promises.