Waiting for Ty (8 page)

Landon eased down behind him. Tucking himself against the shelter of Ty’s back, he hugged him, hoping the night would never end, knowing it would.

“So why couldn’t I fall in love with a woman? Why did it have to be you?” Ty asked.

Was that his roundabout way of telling Landon he loved him? Didn’t matter. He was still leaving.

Except maybe, someday, he’d come back. It could happen because Ty loved him. Yeah, he knew love didn’t conquer all, and at this point, as his heart was breaking, he didn’t even think it made the hardships easier to handle. But hope still lifted its optimistic head. Someday, Ty might realize how rare their feelings for each other were. He
might
give in to them. He
might
come home.

They didn’t make love again. Didn’t talk. Didn’t sleep.

At dawn, Ty slipped out of Landon’s arms, out of his bed. Landon sat up and leaned back against the wall, memorizing every movement Ty made. He picked up his boxer briefs from the floor and stepped into them, then put on his chinos and zipped and buttoned. Shoulders slumped, he stuffed his arms into his shirt and left it hanging open. He shuffled to the folding metal chair in the corner of the room to tug on his socks and dress shoes.

Finally he looked at Landon, his expression tired, resigned. “I’m sorry.”

“Yeah, I know. But listen, if you change your mind or something...” He shrugged. It was a lame effort, but he wanted Ty to know that he’d wait for him. Corny? Yeah. But he didn’t care.

Ty glanced down, then back up, his expression resolved, determined. “Not gonna happen. I don’t want you to get your hopes up.”

The finality of his words crushed Landon’s chest, pinning him to the wall. He wanted to go to him, touch him, kiss him, convince him to stay. Instead, he forced a small smile. “I’m an optimist. Remember?”

“I know I was supposed to help you move next weekend, but I think we need some time. Some distance.”

“Okay. I understand.” And he did. It had been a crazy weekend. They both needed to process it, analyze it. Maybe that was what it would take for Ty to change his mind.

Ty stood and grabbed his bag. He crossed the room, while Landon silently begged him to stay. When he stopped at the bedroom door, Landon’s breath caught. His heart skipped a beat.

But Ty didn’t say anything. Just shook his head and walked away.

Landon didn’t move until he heard the front door open and close. Then he curled into the fetal position and hugged a pillow to his chest.

It smelled like Ty.

Chapter Eleven

Landon’s sisters were decorating his dining room table. Place mats, knickknacks. He understood the place mats would protect the wood. But what was the point of all the doodads they insisted on cluttering the table with? And why did they keep rearranging them?

Nikki finally stepped back, her hands on her pregnancy-thickened waist. Despite the slight increase in her girth, she didn’t look pregnant. If he hadn’t known, he wouldn’t have guessed she had her first bun in the oven. Maybe that was why she was wearing a baby-blue maternity T-shirt that read The Force is Strong With This One.

Meredith stood beside her, arms crossed over her chest. She was curvier than her sister, although he thought the baby might be helping Nikki catch up. They surveyed their handiwork. He hoped they were done, because the boredom was about to kill him. They’d spent the entire weekend hanging “wall art” and buying and organizing frivolous junk. And if they asked him one more time what he thought about this or that particular piece of junk, his brain was going to implode.

Nikki nodded her blond head. “It’s perfect.”

Meredith turned to Landon, her tight, pale curls bouncing in a high ponytail. “What do you think?”

He couldn’t tell them what he really thought. They’d worked too hard and were too pleased with themselves for that. And despite the agony they’d subjected him to this weekend, he still loved them. Both of his sisters were tiny, reaching about midchest on him, but their fragile appearance hid a strength that surprised most people. He loved that about them, even when their collective strength was directed at him, like now. They were amazing women. So he smiled brightly, and it probably appeared real because he was so damned glad they were finally done. “Looks great. Thanks.”

“Are you sure?” Nikki asked. “You don’t think that grouping would work better if we...”

He didn’t hear the rest as his eyes crossed and his brain cells began to topple against each other like dominos. This was torture, pure and simple.

A hand waving in front of his face brought him back. “I was only joking,” Nikki said, her blue eyes flashing mischievously. “Let’s go eat. I’m starving.”

It was a little early for dinner, but Landon was happy to feed her. During her first trimester, the morning sickness had been so bad that she’d lost weight. Since the nausea had ended in December, she was making up for lost meals. They walked to a nearby Mexican restaurant. At four o’clock on a Sunday afternoon, it was dead.

They snagged a prime table next to the window, and he helped his sisters with the heavy, bright-colored chairs before sitting across from them. After they ordered, Nikki said, “Jake just hired a new software engineer who would be perfect for you. She’s smart, beautiful, outgoing.”

Landon barely swallowed his groan. Not bad enough they’d spent the entire weekend decorating his condo. Now Nikki wanted to fix him up. And she would harp on it until he gave in. He loved his sisters. He really did, but why couldn’t he have had brothers?

“You can’t keep sulking over Mollie,” Nikki persisted. “You need to start dating again.”

“I am
not
sulking over Mollie.” She’d broken up with him in December. He’d never felt for her what he did for Ty. He hadn’t loved her. She’d been good company, but that hadn’t been enough for her. Hence the breakup. However, he
was
sulking over Ty. He hadn’t heard from him in over a month, and he’d finally stopped looking for an email, a text, Ty’s name on caller ID.

Fuck, who was he kidding? The only thing that stopped when the phone rang was his heart. He hadn’t given up hope. Not yet. Although it wasn’t quite as strong.

“Great,” Nikki said enthusiastically. “Come to Austin next weekend. I’m having a little get-together for Jake’s employees. You can meet JJ.”

The waiter dropped off their drinks, a bowl of salsa and a basket of tortilla chips, then returned to the kitchen. Landon scooped the salsa with a chip and slowly chewed the spicy blend of tomatoes, onions and jalapeños, trying to buy himself some time. When he’d washed it down with some sweet tea, she was still looking at him expectantly.

“Look, Nikki. I appreciate your concern, but I’m in love with someone and until I can get past that, you’re wasting your time and mine trying to fix me up.”

“Mollie wasn’t good enough for you, and I hate that you’re still hung up on her.”

“It’s not Mollie,” Landon snapped.

Nikki narrowed her eyes. “Then who is she?”

She didn’t believe him. Well, he couldn’t blame her. He hadn’t dated anyone since Mollie had broken it off with him. “It’s not a she. It’s a he,” he said irritably and then immediately regretted the admission. Fuck, fuck, fuck. He’d just come out to his sisters. No gentle ramp-up. No preparation.
Just the facts
,
ma’am
.

Nikki blinked. Meredith gaped. Wonder of wonders. He’d finally discovered the secret to rendering his sisters speechless.

Of course, it didn’t last.

“You’re gay?” Meredith asked, surprise and disbelief mingling in her voice.

How to answer that question? If he said yes, they’d stop trying to fix him up. He mentally snorted.
Yeah
,
right
. They’d just direct their matchmaking talents to men. And if he ever did manage to get over Ty and fall in love with a woman, he’d have to explain the about-face. Although, the way he felt now, he didn’t think that was a likely scenario. Shit. He was so not ready for this conversation. “Uh...”

“It’s okay if you are,” Nikki assured him.

But he wasn’t. Would they get the whole “bi” thing? They had friends who were gay, but bi? He didn’t know of any. “No, I’m not gay.” He paused, then lowered his voice, even though there wasn’t anyone in the restaurant but their waiter, who was still in the kitchen. “I’m bi.” He held his breath as they absorbed what felt like a confession. But it wasn’t. He was just sharing something about himself with them. It was the way he was, nothing shameful or dirty. He straightened and pulled his shoulders back.

Nikki and Meredith stared at him a moment, blue eyes wide and almost identical except for a few lines radiating from the corners of Nikki’s. Then in unison they turned to each other before focusing on him again.

Nikki recovered first. “You know I’m okay with that. Right? Gay, straight, bi. I just want you to be happy.”

Landon hadn’t been aware of the tension tightening his muscles until relief chased it away and left him a little light-headed. “Thanks, sis. I appreciate that. I really do.”

“I only wish you’d told me earlier,” she said, a twinge of hurt in her voice.

He shrugged uncomfortably. “There didn’t seem to be any reason to bring it up.”

Finally Meredith spoke. “Who is he?” Direct as always. No beating around that bush.

He couldn’t tell them. They knew Ty, were friends with him. He hated to think what would happen to that friendship if they found out Landon was in love with him. “Nobody you know,” he mumbled.

“Is it someone you work with?” Nikki asked.

“No.”

“Where did you meet?” she persisted.

He didn’t answer. Not only because of the painful lump in his throat, but also because if he told them, they might figure out it was Ty.

Nikki covered his hand with hers. “I’m sorry. We’re giving you the third degree when your heart is broken.” She squeezed his fingers. “I’m truly sorry. Do you want to talk about it?”

“No.”

“It might make you feel better.”

In what universe? “Maybe later.”

He glanced at Meredith. She was studying him as if her laser-like mind could pierce his skull and access all his secrets. Of the three siblings, she was the brightest, the most gifted. She’d started college when she was sixteen and earned her PhD in astrophysics at twenty-two. Now, at twenty-seven, she was an associate professor and would probably have tenure by next year. But she wasn’t happy. She worried. About everything. Nikki was also a worrywart, but it didn’t burden her like it did Meredith. He had no desire to add to his baby sister’s anxiety. She was already overwrought about Nikki’s pregnancy, even though her heart condition hadn’t slowed her down any.

“Hey, Meredith,” he said gently. “I’m good. Don’t worry about me. Okay?”

She shook her head. “I’m not.” But her voice was shaky, and her eyes were a little too bright.

“Really. I’m fine,” he assured her.

“I know.” She shook her head as she spoke, negating her affirmation.

He rubbed the scar above his eye and gave up, at a loss as to how to put her mind at ease.

Nikki patted his hand, refocusing his attention on her. “You’ll let me know when you’re ready to date again?”

“Um. Yeah. Sure.” He wondered how much time this would buy him, because he didn’t think he’d be ready any time soon.

Chapter Twelve

In a crowded bar a couple of blocks from the state capitol, Ty hunched over the notes he’d scribbled earlier that afternoon. The pretty young aide of a South Texas senator who couldn’t keep his pants zipped had given him dates, places and a half-dozen blatantly sexual emails. Even if the sexual harassment hadn’t bothered him, he couldn’t ignore the stupidity of sending the emails. How the hell did people like that get elected?

The bartender approached him, but Tyler waved him off. He’d barely touched his beer. Maybe that was why he was so irritable.

Yeah
,
right.

He checked his watch for the third time in five minutes. Annie wasn’t late, but he was annoyed that he was still waiting for her. He shouldn’t have asked her out again. He’d known after their first date she wasn’t the one. It wasn’t fair to her. But he kept hoping to find someone who could replace Landon.

He tried to concentrate on his notes so he could work out his next step in the story of the harassing senator. A subtle change in the bar’s atmosphere made him lift his head.

There she was, standing just inside the door, scanning the bar for him. He lifted a hand to catch her attention and crossed the room to meet her. There wasn’t a man in the restaurant who wasn’t checking her out—openly or surreptitiously, depending on whether he was with a woman or not. Tall, blond and built. Even in the conservative black suit, Annie was stunning, no doubt about it. Smart, too. She could hold up her end of a political argument with him, and she loved playing devil’s advocate. She was perfect for him.

Except she wasn’t Landon. Fuck, he missed his friend. When he’d walked out of Landon’s apartment that last time, he’d been eviscerated. At least that’s what it’d felt like. As if someone had gutted him with a dull, rusty, hunting knife. And that wound hadn’t healed over the last two months. They settled into a booth, and as soon as the waitress disappeared with the drink order, Ty said, “Listen. I’m sorry. I don’t have much time tonight. I’ve got a lead on a story.”

She frowned, drawing her brows together pensively. “It’s not really a story, is it?”

“What do you mean?”

“It’s not your job. I recognize the signs.”

He tried not to freeze up, tried to keep his body language nonchalant. He cocked his head and flashed his most charming smile. “Well, if it’s not work, what is it?”

“An unrequited love.”

She was guessing. Had to be. “No, that’s not it,” Ty said dismissively.

She leaned across the table and pinned him with her gaze. “It’s a woman.”

His brows lifted, and he almost laughed he was so relieved. “Really?”

“I don’t know if it’s someone who broke up with you or someone you’re pining over from afar, but it’s a woman.”