Wake Me In The Future (32 page)

‘That’s exactly why you’re trying to kill us all off,’ I spat. I couldn't conceal my contempt for this man any longer.

‘Hardly,’ he continued, ‘when we abandoned our world to look for another home, our numbers were nearly half a trillion. The aging bodies we despised suspended for an unknown length of time. Does that sound familiar Richard? It should, because it’s what you Cryogens and we Manoorans have in common.’

I pondered the striking correlation between the fate of the Cryogens and what some would call these celestial cuckoos.

‘Only a few Manoorans were revived during our journey to Earth.’ he carried on. ‘They were the ones that monitored our progress, and set us on the path to visit you. They planned to interact and communicate with your species. But instead, they had to watch in horror as your petty wars and selfishness led to your extinction.

‘I’ve heard all this before Ramoon, save your breath, I know how you came to take over our planet, like the thieves you are; and how you hate all Cryogens for reminding you that you’re not real humans.’

‘True, it was too good an opportunity to pass by, the template for your artificial bodies had been advanced enough for us to easily adopt, and your system and everything in it was designed to serve this form. As you were all dead there was no ethical reason not to adopt and adapt what you’d left behind’

‘And you think we’re going to play on those ethics and try to make you give up your new lives.’ This was a statement, not a question, ‘You’re wrong Ramoon. That is such a sad and cynical view of what we humans are, and is a million miles off the mark. This system is big enough for us all. Neither of our populations can grow and there’s so much space, I am sure we can evolve into the single race that many of your kind want, including you.’

‘If only that were the case Richard, I wouldn’t have been bothered with any of this. I know that no Cryogen has ever expressed a view that what we did was wrong. However, it’s not your current manifestation that worries me.’

I was confused. ‘I don’t understand Ramoon, what are you talking about.’

‘There is an element of truth in the belief that we Manoorans can't accept what we used to be, and it’s true that we do envy what you were. But it’s a different reason my group are trying to get rid of the last remnants of the original human race.

When we started to revive the people that we discovered on the Moon it was our instinct to put their mindsets into the artificial bodies that we were using, and that your entire race had previously used. But astonishingly, no-one has ever questioned if we could revive any of them in their biological form. And the answer to that question Richard is yes. We could revive most Cryogens successfully in biological form.’

‘I still don’t understand - why would any Cryogen want to be revived in a biological form?’

‘For exactly the same reason humans in the past lived the first few decades of their lives in biological form.’ He paused for effect. ‘So they could reproduce Richard. You Cryogens could pro-create and grow in numbers. Small at first but eventually, over time, you’d outnumber us, and in biological form, unlike in these artificial bodies, there’d be nothing for our system to control.’

It hit me like a sledge hammer full on - ‘Oh my God!’

‘So it’s sinking in then, we’re not just trying to get rid of a few reminders of a previous time.’

‘NO,' I shouted, 'you’re trying to commit genocide! That’s just as bad as if you’d invaded our Solar system and exterminated us in the first place.’

As Ramoon slowly walked towards me, the wall of bars also moved forward, as if they were just as frightened of this monster as I was. ‘I’d gladly do that Richard, to save my kind. Do you think I want a race such as yours, who wiped themselves into oblivion, being resurrected and contaminating us?

You original humans were capable of such extreme behaviour; occasionally seeming little less than your ancient gods in the way you conducted yourselves. Those were the attributes we admired so much, that drew us to you. Yet more often than not you allowed all those admirable virtues to be overwhelmed by your greed and individual selfishness.’ He shook his head again, ‘No, everything that was bad about you we’ve controlled, that would all be released again. Your petty cultural squabbling and insistence that you all know how everyone else should live, and it just happens to be the way you live your own life. That can’t be allowed to come back.’

I backed away and was leaning against the wall at the foot of my cot as Ramoon pointed at me.

‘You’ll be one of the last of your kind,’ he said, ‘tomorrow, when I am watching what’s left of your body burn, I’ll be a step closer to saving my race.’

‘That may be a bit difficult Ramoon.’ I said with hatred in my voice.

‘And why is that Richard?’

‘Because I won’t be here,’ I said, as I leaned back and slid through the wall behind me.

Chapter 35
– Fugitive

Jon’s face was ashen by the time I'd finished explaining the true reason we were being hunted to extinction, and he had that look that people get when they've just discovered the answer to a question that's been plaguing them for years. He was massaging his temples, as if trying to bring something to mind.

‘Why on Earth didn’t anyone think of that? I can’t believe we missed such an obvious motive.’ he still looked dazed, ‘if we’d not been able to create that doorway behind you, or if we’d not been able to do it for another day …well, you’d be gone and this would never have got out. It doesn’t bear thinking about.’

I was sitting in the chair in front of Jon’s desk trying not to think how close I'd come to being killed. ‘I know,’ I said, ‘I am still thanking my lucky stars that your message got through yesterday. I can’t believe how timely it was, it’s a good job the door you opened wasn’t visible. I knew it had appeared just when Ramoon started to spill the beans but I couldn’t bring myself to use it straight away. I had to stay and hear everything he had to say, and it's a good job I did. I only wish I’d been able to see the look on his face after I disappeared.’

‘This makes the situation a lot more dangerous for us all now Richard. The secret’s out of the box, so to speak. And now Ramoon knows we’re aware of what we’re fighting for, he’ll be desperate to get to us.’

He looked at me bemused. ‘I can’t believe it’ he exclaimed again, ‘we‘ve been fighting to preserve what’s left of the human race not knowing that we could actually revive it completely. This raises the stakes to a different level altogether. We can’t afford to fail now.’

‘I know,' I sighed, 'but what I am more worried about right now is what lengths Ramoon will go to in order to get to us. Do you think Rachel and Jane are safe where they are?’

‘I believe so for now;
don't forget
Rachel’s parents are among Ramoon’s closest friends, so I don’t think he’ll try anything at the moment. They’re not his concern if he can get you out of the way. But I don’t think we can count on that staying the case for very long.

There is one thing for certain though; we need to bring our plans forward. It’s too dangerous to continue with our original timetable. Ramoon will be furious with this getting out, and he's almost certain to double his efforts to find us.

Luckily our techs have discovered how to interact with the general Information System without being detected. That’s how we were able to create the doorway for your escape. And they're currently working hard to make things
safe enough for us to make our final move
. But this has changed everything. We can’t afford the luxury of making things safe
anymore
, we’re going to have to take more risks, but even so, the earliest we can attempt a move is a week away. In the meantime I am going to call a halt to any public activities; we can’t afford to slip up at this late stage. We have to keep a low profile and focus on the plans.’

The next few days were a nightmare for me. I was no longer in Ramoon’s prison so wasn’t pre-occupied with the memories from my first life. It was all the challengers that this life was throwing up that were occupying me now. I’d done as much as I could to avoid dealing with the mess that I found myself in. But fate seemed determined to present me with impossible choices.

I was torn by contradicting emotions and conflicting desires. I wanted everything. Helen to be back at my side and to share the life we’d dreamed about, but also Rachel, my new wife, and Jane - my wonderful daughter.

And the fact that Jane wasn’t my biological daughter had no bearing on my paternal feelings towards her. I loved her as much as any father could. This only reinforced the revulsion I felt when I tried to reconcile the love I had for her with the love I had for Helen.

If Rachel found out, she’d be devastated, who wouldn’t? She’d not want to stay with a husband who’d re-found his first true love, especially when she discovered I’d kept the possibility of Helen being alive from her. She’d probably lose her daughter as well, even if, as likely, Jane opted to retain her current life. After all, no one could demand that she revert back to Helen. I was going to lose them all unless I kept quiet about my suspicions and let Helen go. But how could I continue to bring up Jane as my daughter when I knew that Helen could be trapped inside. And anyway, when she matured she could decide to re-integrate her previous self. Oh dear, I couldn't stand what this was doing to me. It was a ‘lose-lose’ situation and I seriously considered for the first time if Helen and I had done the right thing.

Guilt was soaking into just about every part of my personal life, and it was only made worse by the fact that I’d acknowledged the decision my subconscious had made to choose Helen over Rachel. Oh god, this was horrible, because I knew I was keeping the truth from Rachel just in case Helen was really gone, then I could just carry on without hurting her. What kind of man did that make me? It made me feel like I was treating her like second best, and I felt another torrent of guilt rain down on me.

I was being haunted by unanswered questions and until I had the answers to them my life was just going to be one big mess. My heart was saddened by the shadows gathering around it and as they grew darker I felt the now familiar and overwhelming fear that I was going to lose everything. And always, hovering in my mind was the vision of Helen, admonishing me for giving up on her.

I loved three women and whatever the outcome the only guarantee I could foresee was that one way or another all of us were going to be hurt.

I screwed my fists up and pressed them against my forehead. ‘This stinks’ I said out loud, ‘I can’t win.’

‘That bad, huh?’

‘Oh!’ I started. I’d not been aware of Jon entering the room and watching me.

But this was a good opportunity to ask if they could open a channel of communication with my family, in the same way they’d done with me in prison. For all his assurances about their safety, I was desperate to hear from them.

‘I was just coming to see you Jon.’ And standing up to face him I stood with my fingers crossed behind my back as I made my request to make contact with Rachel, and as Jon responded I closed my eyes and once again thanked the God I didn’t believe in.
I’ll have to actually start believing in you if you keep delivering like this,
I thought.

Because Jon had said, 'I've already been thinking about Rachel and Jane’s safety, and I've authorised a plan to get them out of Ramoon's reach, one not dissimilar to the one used to rescue you.

I wanted to surprise you Richard, but I might as well tell you now. We’ve already smuggled an info-tablet in with a message letting them know you’re safe and of our intention to get them out. I am hoping to get a response this evening.’

With a huge smile of relief I said, ‘thank you Jon.’

‘You’re welcome.’ He replied, and after a pause, said, ‘I don’t want to pry Richard, and tell me if you don’t want to talk about it, but you’ve never said anything to me about your new family and what you intend to do if we’re successful in eventually finding Helen. Have you considered it?’

I looked at the ground, despondent. ‘I don’t know what to do Jon. I’ve thought of nothing else since finding out that Helen is still out there somewhere. I love them both but I might have to make a choice. Usually life presents a natural change in the feeling of one love before you can give yourself over to another. And death is usually one of those occasions when it happens. But what do you do when you fall in love again and then find out that the person you loved and thought you’d lost is still alive. I never believed someone could love more than one person like this at the same time....’ and looking into Jon’s eyes I said, ‘but I do.’

'Even thinking what I’ve just said about loving them both makes me feel as guilty as hell. How can I put one above the other? I really do love them both, differently but just as strong. I know I am going to be forced to make a choice and hurt someone I love so much.’ I was overwhelmed and my voice cracked as the familiar sting of tears appeared once again in my eyes. I’d swear I was never this emotional in my first life.

I sat down opposite Jon and tried to hold back the tears which seemed to be the only physical way I could express the confusion my emotions were in.

Jon moved to sit next to me and placed his hand on my shoulder. I was leaning forward with my elbows on my knees and my palms cupping my face.

‘Can I tell you something personal about myself Richard?’ Jon said, ‘I don’t know if it will make you feel any better, but at least you’ll see that other people have sometimes been put through similar torment to what you’re going through now.’

I nodded because I was too emotional to speak.

Jon took a deep breath as if preparing to make some sort of great confession.

‘Before I was frozen, I was in love with two people. But it wasn’t by accident, like in your situation, it was out of necessity.

You see I am attracted to both men and women, and my particular orientation means my emotional and physical attraction is equally as strong for both. Oh, I know there are plenty of people like me that are drawn more one way than the other but the way I am dictates my needs. And it’s a fact, despite the bigots that tried to deny people like me existed; I do know my own feelings.