Chapter Eighteen
Someone was at her door.
Gina opened the door in an obvious haste to end its constant peal. “Colleen!” she exclaimed in surprise and moved out of the way to let her enter.
She waited while Gina quickly scanned her friend from head to toe to make sure that she was all right.
“What's the matter?” Gina asked with concern. She did not even attempt to disguise the worry in her voice. Colleen interpreted all the thoughts that were running through her friend's head as a result of her overactive imagination.
“I'm fine, Gigi,” Colleen addressed her friend and hugged her reassuringly.
With the ease of a friend who knew her way around, Colleen sat on the love seat and patted on the seat, silently bidding Gina to sit by her. Gina quickly complied. Colleen could see that Gina's heart was literally racing. It had been ages since Colleen had appeared at her house unannounced.
Colleen took a huge breath, not sure of where to begin. She'd come to Gina's seeking refuge. She had wanted to voice exactly how she was feeling aloud to a sympathetic ear. But now, looking at her friend, Colleen was beginning to second-guess herself. Maybe coming there had not been a good idea. For the first time since her friendship with Gina, Colleen was reluctant to share this part of her life with her friend. She just didn't feel as if Gina would be able to understand.
Marrying Terence had bound her to him, not just physically, but it seemed as if it were psychological as well. Colleen hadn't been prepared for this emotion. It was new to her. She found that she had lost the words to fully confide in her friend. What happened between her and Terence was their business and God's. It was really no one else's. Not even her friend's.
Colleen saddened at the thought, but she felt surprisingly comfortable with her decision. It was time to draw the line between her husband and her friend.
Holding her body erect, she smiled at Gina. Several minutes had passed, and she still had not yet offered a single word of explanation. Colleen could see that Gina was doing everything in her power to be patient. She knew that it was killing her to stay silent this entire time. Colleen reached over and gave her friend an even longer, tighter hug. Gina returned the embrace with a reassuring squeeze.
“I . . . I just came by to see you . . . to get out . . .” Colleen began in a low voice.
“Okay,” Gina responded.
Colleen could hear the uncertainty in her voice. For a split second, she felt the urge to appease her friend's curiosity, but Colleen stood her ground. She was not going to bring her friend into the mix. Especially since she had a pretty good idea of how Gina would react.
“I'm okay,” Colleen said again. She released Gina from the hug. Then she put a smile on her face to convince her friend that she was indeed okay.
“Okay, I know you came here to tell me something, but looking at you, I can see that you've changed your mind. Whatever it was, I see you're going to keep it to yourself. I know I can't push you, but please just reassure me that I have nothing to worry about,” Gina pleaded with her friend.
Colleen looked Gina in the eye and smiled. “You have nothing to worry about.”
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“You're scared. Admit it.” Terence felt a bit apprehensive to go home and face his wife. He had no idea how Colleen would react to him. He also had no idea how he would react to her.
Honestly, he felt like a wuss . . . a big retard. Terence could not, for the life of him, explain how he had broken down in front of his wife in that manner last night. He could not believe that he'd started crying like a sissy and had begged her not to hit him. He was supposed to be the strong oneâthe man. How on earth could he have allowed himself to become so vulnerable toward someone else?
Terence had grappled with that question all day. It didn't matter that it had been his wife with whom he had become vulnerable. The fact that he still remained vulnerable and men just did not do that sort of thing. And he'd confided something to Colleen that he had shoved in the inner recesses of his mind ages ago. He thought he had buried those memories so deep down that there would be no bringing them back. Yet, they had resurfaced and Colleen had seen him at his weakest point.
He'd cried until his nose was stuffy and his throat sore. He'd clung to Colleen like she was a life jacket. If he hadn't been holding on to her, he felt like he would have sunk emotionally in a dire pit.
You have me. You can depend on me.
Recognizing God's voice, Terence sat and whispered in an awed tone, “Lord, do you still love me?” He asked the question, filled with doubt and disbelief. How could God still love him when he was like one of the biggest hypocrites out there? He was holding the Bible with one hand, and punching his wife with another.
As far as the east is from the west, that's how far I have removed your transgressions.
“God, would you do that for me?” Terence questioned aloud. Somehow, he just couldn't grasp the whole “wipe the slate clean and start over” concept. He didn't want to get off so easy. It just didn't seem fair after the pain he'd caused his wife.
Yet, Colleen had stayed with him, and had hushed him. He recalled the tears in her eyes that brimmed with sincerity as she said, “I love you, Terence. I forgive you. Tell me what happened.”
Terence had opened his mouth, as he felt the story begging to come out, but all he could say was, “My mother hurt me. She hurt me as a child, Colleen.”
“What did she do?”
“I . . . I can't talk about it now, but I will tell you. I promise. I just need you, Colleen. I don't want you to leave me, though I deserve it. I should never have put my hands on you.”
“You're right. You shouldn't have.” Colleen had agreed. He'd seen her contemplate something before she looked at him and said, “God is telling me that He brought us together. I can't promise you that I'll get past this overnight, but we can start by praying.”
Then to his shame and amazement, his wife had prayed for him. She had cried out to God on his behalf. Then she'd held him until he had fallen asleep. Terence had awakened the next day embarrassed, and had left before she woke up.
Terence paced. He just did not know how to behave after bearing his soul like that. Would things just go back to normal? He closed his eyes and expelled a huge breath. Truth be told, it was a relief to talk about his experience with someone like his wife. Colleen was such a caring woman, and she was capable of so much. But she was also an old-fashioned woman. Maybe she would see him as a weak man now. Maybe she would use the information that he had shared with her against him.
Terence hit his forehead and grunted as another thought occurred to him. Colleen was sure to tell Gina about this. From what he knew, Colleen always told Gina everything.
Great! Now, there would be two women he would have to avoid.
He rubbed his forehead and squeezed his eyes tightly closed. He could feel a headache coming on. His secretary beeped him to inform that his mother was on the phone.
Overwhelmed, Terence shook his head. His mother was the last person that he wanted to talk to. Everything was just too fresh in his mind right now. “Tell her I already left for the day,” he replied.
Then he stopped in surprise as a thought occurred. That was the first time he could remember ever turning away a call from his mother. He thought about that for a minute; then he smiled.
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Francine hung up the phone and looked at her watch. Terence should have still been at work.
That's strange.
He always let her know when he was going to be somewhere else. His secretary had put her on hold saying that Terence was there. Then she'd returned with a cryptic, “He's unavailable,” before abruptly ending the call.
Unless Terence was just not accepting any calls from her . . .
He wouldn't!
Francine frowned in disgust.
Colleen!
She didn't even have to think twice about it. She knew that somehow, and in some way, that tart was connected to this! Imagine! Her own son refusing to talk to her!
Francine tapped her nails impatiently. Well, she would soon fix that. She was going to give Terence a piece of her mind the next time she saw him. They were scheduled to have lunch the very next day. Francine made up her mind that she would deal with him then.
The next day, Francine entered the restaurant pleased to see that her son was already there and waiting. He knew how much she abhorred tardiness. She lifted her chin, feeling assuaged when Terence got up to make sure she was settled in her chair and gave her the usual perfunctory kiss on the cheek.
She stiffened when she heard his huge sigh. Francine ignored him and spoke her mind. “Why didn't you take my call yesterday, because I know you were in the office?” she asked in an accusatory tone.
Terence did not even bother denying it, but he answered her truthfully. “I just did not feel like talking to anyone yesterday. I had a lot on my mind.”
Francine was put off by his answer. “Well! I am not just anyone, Terence. I am your mother!”
“I know that,” he said dryly. “You never let me forget it.”
Francine stopped and stared at her son. His sarcasm was not lost on her. She did not appreciate his smart remark at all. “I would thank you to mind your manners with me, young man!” she warned. She lifted her eyebrows at him and waited for the usual apology. Unfortunately, none was forthcoming.
She saw Terence merely shrug dismissively before he picked up his menu and scanned its contents. “Are you ready to order?”
Francine was nonplussed at her son's odd behavior. What was going on here? She wisely decided to change tactics. “Are you all right?” she finally asked.
“Yes. Why?” he responded.
Before Francine could go on, Terence's cell phone rang and interrupted the conversation. Speculatively, she eyed him and observed his every move. It was Colleen. Ugh! She should have known! Francine dropped her napkin to show her displeasure.
“Colleen,” Terence said, warmly. “What's up?”
“I just called to hear your voice.” Terence's volume was loud enough for her to hear Colleen's responses. She frowned and tapped her nails on the table, hoping he would get the hint and get off the phone. To her dismay, he studiously ignored her.
“It's nice hearing from you,” he answered.
Francine saw that his face was practically beaming, and she wrinkled her nose, not bothering to hide her displeasure. However, at that moment, Terence did not care about her feelings.
“Actually, I can't wait to see you later. We have to talk. I'm here having lunch with my mother, though. But, you know what I think? I'll cut out of work early to see you.”
Francine harrumphed at this last statement, but Terence seemed content to just let her stew. She felt relieved when he finally ended the call and gave her his complete attention.
Francine saw the challenging glare that her son gave her. She supposed that he was waiting for her to make one of her customary cutting remarks about his wife. Now Francine was many things, but an idiot was not one of them. She knew that her son was in a funk and now was definitely not a good time to throw any insults. Judging by his behavior, Colleen must have given it to him real good last night because her son was sitting there, acting the fool. Francine was willing to bet that Colleen had even done
things
that
good
girls just didn't do. She just looked like that type.
Francine picked up her menu to order and let the moment pass. She put the charm on and pretty soon, she and her son were enjoying themselves immensely. But Francine's resentment toward Colleen had now doubled. She felt threatened by the younger woman. Colleen was taking her place. Pretty soon, Terence would no longer even want to see her.
His own mother.
Francine's fears were unfounded, but she didn't realize that she had no reason to feel that way. In her mind, she felt that the more love Terence showed Colleen, the less that would leave for her. She just could not afford to let that happen. She had to break those two up, by any means necessary, and she knew just how to do it. But, for now, she would bide her time.
Chapter Nineteen
Keith watched as Michael looked at his cell, and then sighed. Over Gina's head, he mouthed the question, “Karen?”
Keith pressed his lips together but didn't say anything. Gina turned her head toward Michael's direction. His brother needed to answer that phone. Keith observed the silent conversation taking place before him.
Gina looked at Michael with the question in her eyes, “Aren't you going to answer that?” Michael looked away, but Keith knew that his conscience was killing him.
The phone rang a second time. “Answer it,” Keith commanded. He knew Gina wouldn't let that slide a second time.
Michael nodded. He uttered a quick, “Hello,” before discreetly turning the volume on the phone down. Seeing Gina curve her body to listen in on Michael's conversation, Keith intervened. With a light tap, he captured Gina's attention so Michael could make his escape.
Michael gave his brother a look of undying gratitude. Keith returned with a look of his own telling Michael he would hear it later.
Gina's mind had followed Michael outside the room and onto the patio. He knew the best way to divert her. Keith dropped his voice. “I just wanted to thank you again for listening to me the other night.”
Gina gave him her full attention then. “It was nothing. I consider the fact that you confided in me an honor,” she stated. She had lowered her voice as well.
“Well, it meant a lot to me. I hope you realize that.” Keith gave her a warm smile.
Gina beamed in return. “The food was delicious,” she complimented.
He saw her search for something else to say, but she was obviously coming up short. He was also trying to keep his face from proclaiming his love for her.
Keith had called to invite Gina over to his house for dinner again. He had to see her. He wanted to see if what he was feeling was his imagination or a reality.
Gina had gladly accepted once she heard that Michael would also be there. Keith had told her that Michael was staying with him, since he lived closer to her than Michael did.
“Thank you,” Keith answered with a smile. He could feel the ever-present tension building between the two of them. He knew she felt it too. There was no denying their mutual attraction. “I really invited you because I just needed to see you. It's been like forever.”
“Forever? Keith, that's a gross exaggeration.” Gina blushed and pulled her sweater closer.
He heard her husky laughter and glanced behind him. Michael was still on the phone. Keith was going to give his mule head of a brother an earful. He needed to shake Karen loose and hold on to Gina.
Speaking of holding on to something, Keith tenderly asked Gina, “Can I hug you?”
“You want a hug?” she repeated.
Keith snatched her to him. “Yes.”
He felt her body curve into his and inhaled deeply. He could stay like this forever. Aerosmith's song came to mind. He hummed, “Don't wanna close my eyes . . .”
“Get your hands off my woman!” Michael boomed from behind them.
Ignoring Gina's harsh intake of breath and her attempts to pull away, Keith methodically turned to face his brother. He challenged, “And if I don't?”
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Gina looked down to see that her cell phone was blinking, which meant that she had a message waiting. She would check it during her lunch hour the next period, she told herself as she continued her discussion. However, her actions hadn't gone unnoticed.
“You got a hot date, Ms. Price?” Mark, a particularly bright student asked. The entire class laughed and began making catcalls.
Gina laughed along with them before lifting her hands to silence them. “I won't know the answer to that question until . . .” She looked at her watch and waited a few seconds. “Now!” she said. The bell rang simultaneously with her declaration.
The students laughed again. They thought Ms. Price was so cool.
“He's a lucky man, Ms. Price,” another student, Steve, said.
“Thank you,” Gina replied graciously. She probably should have reprimanded Steve, but shoot, he was right. Besides, this was her best class. She loved the high school seniors because she could kid around with them, as long as they maintained their respect for her.
Gina waited patiently until the last student left her room before going into the back of her classroom where she had better reception. She checked her message. It was Keith. He said he wanted to see her. Gina could not help the wide grin that spread across her face. The sound of his voice was enough to brighten her day. She pressed her hands to her cheeks. Gina just knew her face was as bright as a lightbulb.
She looked at her watch. She had just enough time to return his call. “Hello?”
“Hi, I want to see you. I need a hug!”
“Remember the last time you asked for one? You and your brother almost came to blows.”
“Say what?”
Gina heard Keith burst into laughter and embellished her tale. “Yes, imagine two grown men duking it out like that. You two were Neanderthals.”
“You wouldn't be making jokes if that really happened, believe me. Michael and I rarely ever fought over anything as boys. But I have a feeling if we ever did, it would be catastrophic since we both have vicious tempers. Besides, he was joking, and you know it.”
“I saw him punch you senseless.” Gina crossed her fingers at her fib. Michael had actually given his brother a playful swat on the arm. He had no reason to doubt her or his brother.
“Gina, stop it! I'll see you later. Be ready.”
She looked at her phone. Keith was soâstraightforward.
To her surprise, it rang again. Two calls in one day. She picked up on the second ring. “Hi, Colleen,” she said after seeing her best friend's name on the caller ID screen. “It's good hearing from you.”
“Yeah,” Colleen agreed. “It feels like ages instead of mere days.”
Gina shared Colleen's sentiment. “I never once imagined that there would be a time when we would go this long without talking.”
“Me either,” Colleen said on a more serious note. “I guess . . . I don't know . . . I just know that I miss you.”
Gina felt a pang. She realized that she also missed her longtime friend. Colleen was right. It didn't feel like days; it felt like ages. To Gina, it seemed as if there was so much going on with the two of them that they barely had the time to speak to each other.
“Well, I called to fix that,” Colleen proposed. “How about a girls' night?”
Her eyebrows rose at that suggestion. That sounded like a good idea to her. Before Colleen got married, they had so many of those nights that it was as if they lived at each other's houses. But, Gina supposed marriage had changed things. They could still hang, but now they just had to plan. She could live with that.
“I love it!” Gina exclaimed.
“Good! Terence will be going on a spiritual retreat with the other ministers in the church, so you could come over here and spend the night with me.”
“Sounds like a plan.”
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She heard the phone ring and Francine rushed to answer the call. She just knew it was Terence calling to check in on her before he went on the retreat. He would most assuredly be apologizing for his behavior at lunch the other day too. She took her own sweet time to answer the phone. Not for one second did she intend for her son to get the impression that she had missed him.
“Hello?” Francine injected a calm and relaxing tone, even though her heart was beating a mile a minute.
“Hello, Francine.”
Francine frowned at the other end, recognizing Colleen's voice. She looked at the phone to make sure that she was hearing the right voice. “Hello, Colleen,” Francine said. Her voice had cooled several degrees. She had no reason to even try to be friendly. Unless . . . “Is Terence all right?”
“Yes,” Colleen responded. “Yes, he is. He just left actually, and asked me to call and check up on you to see if you needed anything.”
Francine stood up straight. Her mouth popped open and closed like a fish. She was not hearing right. Terence had the audacity to leave without calling her first! Then, he had the nerve to have his wife call her, a woman that she could not stand? Francine was outraged. Her last shred of politeness disappeared. “I do not need anything from you, missy.
Nothing at all!”
Francine banged the receiver into place. Her chest was heaving with something akin to hatred for Colleen. She closed her eyes as another emotion assailed her. She bit on her lips, trying not to acknowledge what she was feeling. But she had to. She was afraid. The moment she had been fighting tooth and nail was here. Another woman was slowly replacing her. Terence obviously didn't care for her anymore. It was as if Colleen was wiping away all the love her son had for her. Francine gulped and allowed the tears to run down her cheeks. She was losing her son. Her baby didn't need her anymore.
Francine sat there in her apartment feeling truly alone now. Turning her head, she looked all around her apartment and all that she could see were pictures of her son, outlining every aspect of his lifeâfrom birth, to infancy, to school, to graduation. The pictures, the memories were all there. Her eyes landed on the most recent addition to her collection. It was Terence and Colleen's wedding picture.
Francine got up and walked over to the mantle to pick up the picture. She held the frame in her hands and intently studied the picture like a hawk watching its prey. She felt the resentment build as she looked at Colleen's smiling face.
She
was happy, while Francine was absolutely miserable. Francine's hand flew to her throat. She honestly didn't know what to do without her son in her life. He was her shining achievement. He had always been.
Francine had gotten pregnant at fifteen. Not knowing what else to do, her parents had shipped her off to live with her aunt. All her friends and family had abandoned and ostracized her. She had felt so alone. Crying herself to sleep many nights, Francine had vowed she was going to love her son and give him everything she could, no matter what the cost. Doggedly, Francine had worked and attended GED classes throughout her entire pregnancy, but once the baby came, she had to quit her job. Her aunt was no help. She only made sure that Francine had a roof over her head. Francine had to feed and clothe herself and her young son all by herself.
That was how she had gotten involved with the church. Francine had started going because there was always someone willing to give her a free meal after the service or money for food. She'd gratefully used the money to buy Terence's Pampers and baby food. The government gave her aunt money for her rent and she did get some food stamps, but it was not enough.
Ensconced in her memories, Francine let the tears fall.
She remembered how she'd even gone back to her parents to beg them to take her in. They had refused. So, she had done the next best thing. She married Deacon Fisher Hayworth. He was not the best-looking man, and he was twenty years her elder, but Francine knew that he could provide for her and her son. In fact, Deacon, as she called him, owned his own business, so Francine never had to work another day in her life.
When Deacon died, he left everything to her and Terence, who he had adopted as his own. Terence had never known who his real father was. Francine had not seen any good in telling him the truth. She had transformed herself into a new, upright woman, and that was all her son needed to know.
And, she had been hard on Terence. She had pushed him. She'd disciplined him hard because she wanted him to be something. Francine wanted to prove to everybody who had cursed her and called her a slut that she was worth something, no matter how she had started out. And, she had. Terence had turned into a fine, young man. He'd never ever gone against her . . . until Colleen.
Francine heaved a huge sigh and pulled a tissue out of the box nearby. She wiped her face and swallowed. She replaced the picture of the happily married couple and turned. Wiping her hands on her skirt, Francine vowed she would fix that. Colleen wasn't going to take her son away from her.
Determinedly, Francine picked up the phone to make a call to the one woman who could.