Watching You: KJ Elite Inc. (13 page)

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Tommy shoved Matt but to my surprise Matt hardly budged.

This wasn’t going to be good.

“It means, have you looked at her? You let
that
just walk away. Someone had to be there for her.” Matt pointed at me and let his eyes roam my body from head to toe and back up, then winked.

“Being there for her doesn’t mean you have to fuck her!”

“Now you’re just assuming things. That makes you an ass.”

Matt was actually laughing right now? I think he’s suicidal and I have to remind myself to remind Siri to have me get him evaluated, if he lived.

“Tommy, I did not fuck him as you so bluntly theorized!” I yelled, trying to be heard over the loud buzzing of their egos and inflating of their chests. “He is the only person who has been there for me since I left and we’ve never slept together.”

“Well, define sleep together.” Matt chuckled and Tommy glowed a brighter shade of murderous.

“Matthew! This is not funny anymore.” I moved to them and smacked his arm, watching Tommy closely as he clenched his jaw and his biceps flexed.

“Yes it is.”

“You’re lucky I haven’t thrown your ass through that wall yet.” Tommy stated, pointing beside them.

“I would love to see you try, stud.” Matt took a step closer with that grin still plastered to his face.

Hell, I was wanting to punch my best friend right now. I didn’t want Tommy and Matt fighting and it had nothing to do with romantic feelings, but the fact that they were the two closest men in my life. If Matt was Jason, I may have just let Tommy do his little macho man thing.

I quickly jumped between them and stealthily stomped on both of their feet, making them both step back, involuntarily.

“There. That’s better. Now stop it with the, my-dick-is-bigger game, will you?” I looked at them both so neither one thought I was defending the other. “I am a big girl and can sleep with whoever I want
but
this is neither the time nor the place to discuss all of this. In case y’all forgot, I am dealing with a lot of shit right now and I don’t want to have to listen to all of this. For the love of all things chocolate, just both of y’all turn around and go your separate ways.”

To my surprise Tommy took another step back after a long pause and just to throw some cherry bombs into the fire that was my betrothed, Matt stepped forward, lightly grabbed my wrist and leaned in to lay a kiss on my cheek before he turned around and walked back to his temporary room. I’m certain I heard Tommy growl before he grabbed my other wrist and tugged me back towards the stairs.

“Ow, you’re hurting me.” I whined.

Immediately he slackened his hold and turned to me, without hesitation he tossed me back over his shoulder and away he went, up the stairs skipping two at a time. His fluid grace and tight muscles made me envy and despise him all at once. Torn between taking a bite out of his ass and smacking it, I went with punching him in the chest when he let me down at the foot of the bed.

“What was that for?” He asked, feigning innocence.

“You infuriate me.” I huffed.

“It’s one of my many talents.” He had the audacity to grin at me.

I simply yelped out of frustration.

“Why did you come in here earlier, Taylor?”

I had to think a minute and gain my bearings because his change of subject and demeanor nearly gave me whiplash.

“What do you care?”

“Well considering you found me in the shower, holding my dick, I might like to know what you needed.”

So vulgar. I kind of liked it.              

Well, maybe I did. Want, need – they’re one in the same where this man was concerned.

I took a deep calming breath and sat down. Focus Taylor Ann.

“I was just bringing you some clean clothes. I was going back to bed and didn’t want you to have to search in the dark for clothes. So sue me.”

“Well then, thank you.”

I turned and nearly ran into the
door
.

“Be careful.” He almost shouted.

My clumsiness always made him nervous; I don’t know why, I was the one who got hurt or embarrassed.

When I was out of the door I replied, “Yeah, yeah,” loud enough for him to hear.

I was so clumsy, I averaged 10 slips, trips or falls a day and it was always his biggest concern for me.

Again, no idea why.

Throwing his shirt on and some deodorant, he headed out of the bathroom probably hoping I was sleeping.

No such luck, bud.

I sat here on the bed, papers sprawled out before me and my notebook on my lap, a pencil in my mouth.

“What are you lookin’ at?” I asked peeking up at him, although I already knew.

“Nothing. Get some sleep. I’ll be downstairs if you need me.”

“Tommy?"

He stopped in his tracks.

I had nothing to say, really, but I didn’t want to be alone either. Instead, I stayed quiet a minute and then shook my head. Despite my anger and fear, I was still incredibly and undeniably sexually attracted to Tommy. That could be troublesome so I was going to fight it as long as I could, knowing it might not be that long – but at least  I’ll have put some sort of effort into it.

“Never mind. Goodnight.”

I wanted to ask him to stay like old times, to hold me, let me cry, let me scream and shout and beat against his chest. He was my strongest crutch and my biggest weakness. I can’t afford to be weak right now, not in the midst of everything going on right now. I also noticed there has been something there, behind his eyes, hiding that brilliant light that has always been like my lighthouse, my buoy in the dark of night. Yes, it’s been quite some time since we leaned on each other.

“Sweet Dreams.” I murmur.

Something flared again in his eyes and he nodded once, then turned and walked out the room. Probably, he was hoping to get far away from me again.

Like I could ever intimidate him
.
I wasn’t big and I wasn’t small; I was, in my own eyes, just right. My size 7 ass and 38D cup with a better amount of muscle over fat. My legs are little, they don’t go on for miles but they got me where I needed to go, and where I didn’t most times. My little hands could fit through cuffs on the smallest setting. Of course I know from experience.

Our great and respected town authority, Sheriff Mills, had tried to make an example out of me and it turned out not so well...for either of us. I was a stubborn headed, wild child at the unprepared age of 16, that got caught one too many times sneaking into the old shutdown paper factory on the edge of town. It wasn’t my fault it happened to be on a hill and had the most gorgeous view of our little town. Also, it didn’t help that there is no security and the doors are a snap to pick open. Tommy was right by my side every single time.

That night in particular though, I was especially wild after having had to deal with an angry and insanely jealous ex-boyfriend who couldn’t accept no. I had to get away, relax a spell, but the Sheriff wasn’t listening to a lick of it. Yep, our mama’s nearly had a heart attack when Sheriff Mills drove us all the way through town with his lights on, up and down every single street to show us off in his backseat. Really, you would have thought he had caught America’s Most Wanted. He was mighty smug until he realized I hadn’t had any cuffs on and was smiling, waving a royal wave at the passersby.

Later that night, Tommy and I nearly died from laughter at how he turned so red and shrieked like a banshee, nearly running us into a gang of trash cans. It’s a surprise we could hold it in even then. TJ and I had some mighty fine times together but I don’t think any will trump the time I gave myself to him.

And with this thought, I drifted off into a pleasant slumber full of strong, knowing hands wandering to exactly where I needed them. Licking, stroking, rubbing, pinching, and massaging me into orgasm at the most intense and responsive bits of my body, coaxing out loud moans, panting his name and high praise.

Chapter 8

The following day, my brother Charlie came back and accompanied me to the hospital where it looked like a ghost town aside from the nurses and doctors roaming from room to room. My mother had spent the night and went home to collect herself, so the chair beside his bed was empty. I stood a minute, taking in the whole scene; the bed that seemed to swallow him, making him look frail and the beeping of all the machines working for him. Slowly and very carefully, I sat down and fought back the tears and the sob stuck in the middle of my throat, threatening to escape at any second.

He looked so serene and yet, so… defenseless. A word I never associated with my father was defenseless; he was always the backbone of our family, the muscle and the brain, the Alpha to my mother’s Omega. This small look on him killed me dead where I sat.

I reached for his hand and clasped it between my two much smaller, softer hands. For the whole two hours I stayed there with him, just talking to him about everything and drawing circles and random shapes on his hand.

I heard once that even in a coma, patients could hear what was being said to them, even if they were unresponsive. Everything I thought of from my nonexistent social life to the current stalker situation, anything that crossed my mind, I talked at him about. A few times I had to stop, for my own curiosity, just to see if he would squeeze or respond in some way. Looking disheveled and delighted in one, my eldest brother came strutting into the room and announced that it was time to go if I didn’t want “my” mama to show up and spot me.

Wiping a few stray tears from my cheeks with the back of my hands, I stood and stretched onto my tip toes to kiss my dad’s cheek. Charlie led me out of the room and when we were in the elevator he held his hand out to me in support. I snorted and scrunched my nose up in mock disgust.

Pushing his hand away I said, “Yeah, puh-lease. I have no idea where those things have been lately. Or ever, yuck!”

Instead, he turned and let me jump onto his back - something I had been doing since I was walking; the only way he knew how to help and later on, comfort me. I laid my cheek on his shoulder blade and fiddled with his sheriff’s star as he led us out the back exit of the hospital and to his most prized possession: His red, 1972 Chevy Chevelle with black stripe up the center and matching leather interior; not a single scratch on it. Charlie let me down to “very carefully slide in and not break anything”. I sniggered at him as he closed my door and climbed in behind the wheel. It was still weird to see him in that sheriff’s outfit regardless of the fact that he was getting ready to step into it when I was graduating.

My heart returned to its broken state, remembering what my brothers had to contend with, hiding me from our mom, my dad’s coma and him...Tommy. Just the simple act of picturing him in my mind turned anything innocent into a raging, grinding, all consuming, explosive heat wave. There was no question in my mind that I still had it just as bad as the day I realized that he was the only guy for me, but there was also no question that he did not feel the same way based off of his facial expressions and avoidance when I was near. I won’t lie and say it didn’t hurt.

A lot. A whole fucking lot.

Getting back to the house I kissed my brother’s cheek and went straight back upstairs, into the room I had been occupying since my arrival. Alone.

For the next week I visited my father when I wasn’t in the master suite writing how I normally preferred - pen to paper, music blaring, and no disruptions.  Matt came and kept me company, talking, watching movies, playing cards and sometimes he just watched me write. That is the beautiful thing about being a writer, I can work anywhere, anytime. When I finally gave up to the sleepiness clawing at my sanity,  I slept like crap, rolling around and wishing I had someone, Tommy in particular, to keep me company all night in person rather than starring in my dreams.

Not that they were dreadful or anything but reality is much more satisfying than fantasy. If he hadn’t given every indication of things being over between us, I would have asked him to stay with me that night. I just couldn’t bring myself to look that desperate, after he made his feelings clear. I mean, he had me on a silver platter in the damn library and he walked out on me. He could have slept with me multiple times but he chose to stay on the couch and sure, he was protective of me after all these years still because we had known each other all our lives; also, who really wants their lawfully wedded wife to be sleeping with another man, no matter how not in love they are? That part of me that I knew would get me in trouble soon, was begging all the other parts to change his mind, but the smarter parts told me to keep holding out – maybe I’d get a reprieve. The idiotic thought made me laugh to myself.

There was a moment I felt so deeply relieved, pushed up hard and wet, sandwiched between him and the wall. When I wrapped my legs around him and kissed him, he walked me over to that couch and set me down with such promise. That is, until he walked away without another word and without another touch. Lord how I ached for that electric shock when our bodies were near. It was like being struck by lightning every time. But you know, you don’t know what you’ve got til’ it’s gone.