Waterfalls (20 page)

“Oh, pu-leeze,” Meri said. “When are you going to stop with the matchmaking? Did he tell you his view of love? That one would stop you dead in your attempts. He thinks falling in love is a chemical reaction. That’s all. His views are about as romantic as cold fish-head soup.”

Shelly laughed. “Where did you get that?”

“From the cold fish himself,” Meri said, reaching over and dead-heading some of the shriveled-up daffodils Mom seemed to have missed. “He, Helen, and I had a little discussion at my house Friday night. Jake seems to think the spiritually correct route to marriage is to make a logical choice in a suitable life partner and then commit to that person. Feelings shouldn’t be involved.”

“That’s not such a radical notion,” Shelly said, snipping a bunch of pansies low at their base. “Jonathan and I made a logical commitment to each other when we got back together and before we became engaged. It’s part of the process.”

“Yes, but you and Jonathan were also in love. You knew you were. Everyone knew you were. You had lots of feelings between the two of you. That’s how I want it to be for me. I want some man to be absolutely taken with me, and I want to be wild about him, not logical and calculated as Jake says it’s supposed to be if it’s to last.”

Shelly flung her long, fawn-colored hair over her shoulder and took a good look at her little sister. “You already are wild about him, aren’t you?”

“Jake?”

“Yes, of course, Jake. I can see it on your face, Meri. Now I know why you were always badgering me about admitting that I was still in love with Jonathan. It shows up in a woman’s face when she says his name, doesn’t it?”

Meri let out a sigh and sat down on the weathered railroad tie that held the second level of the terrace in place. “You know me,” she began her unplanned confession to her sister. “I don’t get crazy about men. I’ve held out for a hero. I’m pure as the driven snow. I’ve prayed for my future husband for years. I’m trusting God that he has one perfect Mr. Right just for me and that he’ll bring him into my life when the timing is right. I also believe what everyone has always told me about love: When it’s right, you’ll know it.”

“Well, everyone is wrong,” Shelly said flatly. “You don’t always know when it’s right. At least I didn’t. It took me five years to admit that Jonathan was right for me.”

“You guys were a special case,” Meri said, plucking a weed from the soil beside her.

“Everyone is a special case,” Shelly said. “And now do you want to hear something that will freak you out?”

Meri shrugged.

“I don’t believe there is only one man for one woman.”

“What is that supposed to mean?”

“You just said that you believe God has one perfect Mr. Right for you. First of all, nobody is perfect. So don’t hold your breath waiting for someone perfect. And second, I agree with Jake. Marriage is a commitment. I don’t believe there is only one perfect man waiting for you, Meri. I think you could end
up marrying one of many different men and be very happy and satisfied if you’re both deeply committed to each other.”

“This is too much,” Meri said, getting up and pacing back and forth on the garden pavers. “Of all people, how can you say such a thing? Jonathan is the one and only for you, and you are the one and only for him.”

“That’s how it turned out. But if he had ended up marrying Elena, I believe the two of them would have been very happy if they both were committed to their vows.”

“Oh, come on,” Meri said. “They would never have lasted. His heart was yours from the start.”

“But when I left Seattle, he slowly made room in his heart. Then when Elena came along there was enough room for her to fit in there comfortably without ever bumping into me.” Shelly put down the basket and batted at a fly eavesdropping on their chat. “Jonathan and I have talked about this before. He agrees. The larger portion of love is the choice. What makes it real is the commitment to honor and nurture that choice.”

“You’re bursting all my bubbles,” Meri said flatly. “Whatever happened to heart-stopping, spine-tingling, take-your-breath-away love? And please, oh, please don’t you dare say that’s just a chemical reaction—because I might be forced to take these clippers to your hair if you do!”

Shelly paused before letting a wide, welcoming smile draw up the corners of her mouth. “Does he take your breath away?”

“Who? Jake? No, of course not!”

Shelly raised her eyebrows. “Stop your heart a little? Give your spine a little tingle?”

Meredith held up her chin. “I find him intriguing.”

Shelly laughed. “Intriguing? That’s the exact word he used to describe you when Jonathan asked him last night. Jake said you weren’t like any woman he had ever met and he found you intriguing.”

“Is that a step up from ‘original’?”

Shelly smiled. “You know what I think? I think spine-tingling romance is much more than a chemical reaction. I think it’s the icing on the relationship.” She raised her eyebrows and gave Meredith a knowing look. “Believe me, there is nothing like having your breath taken away and then having it given back to you by your true love.”

Meri knew this was the voice of experience speaking.

“But you can’t live on icing,” Shelly said. “Spine-tingling comes and goes. It’s the commitment that builds the real base for love.”

“You’re telling me you don’t get tingly anymore? You’re married one year and all the tingles are gone?”

“I didn’t say that!” Shelly laughed, and her cheeks turned rosy. “It’s only getting better, believe me. All I’m saying is if you plan for the commitment, the tingles will come.”

On her way home, Meredith mulled over her sister’s words. She drove her Explorer onto the ferry and walked up to the top deck, eager to feel the wind in her hair. To her surprise, it was cold once the boat moved out on the water. Shivering cold. The sun, which had been the area’s guardian for so long, was now being replaced by huge clouds that carried rain in their dark hems. It would be wonderful to have some rain again, but as Meri clutched her arms and headed back inside the ferry, she thought of how much she was going to miss the sun and the clear blue skies.

By the time she was off the ferry and driving home on Whidbey Island, the clouds were letting out their hems. Great drops of rain spattered her windshield. Meredith switched on the radio, hoping to catch a weather report. A familiar love song was ending.

“When I see you, that’s when I know

Love like this is ours alone
.

When I touch you, that’s when you see

Your lips were meant for only me.”

“That’s pretty self-serving,” Meri muttered, switching to another channel. The next song was an oldie.

“Girl, what you do to me is better than

The perfect wave

On the perfect day

On the perfect beach
,

So come here, baby
,

And do it all over again.”

“Good grief,” Meri muttered, dialing in a western music station.

“You left me

And here I stand

Heart in my hat
,

Hat in my hand.”

She couldn’t bear to listen to the rest. The way that song was unfolding, Meri was sure it would contain a tender reference to either this country boy’s truck or his dog before it was over, and those two items were at the very bottom of her list of favorites.

Of course, she knew most songs were written about love. That’s what kept the whole industry going. It had never occurred to her how much those songs were based on feelings and selfish desires. She had never heard a song that said anything like

“Even if you get hit by a semi

And your face is mashed

And you’re in a wheelchair
,

I’ll still love you

Just like I love you now.”

True, songs like that might not hit the top of the charts, but still, it made her think about how slanted the whole industry
was toward romance. Subconsciously she had been influenced over the years by those songs as she formed her concept of love.

She wondered if Jake and Shelly had more of a point than she wanted to admit. Suddenly Meredith felt more grown-up. It was more than turning twenty-five and seeing her parents move toward retirement, although both factors certainly played a part in what she was going through. It was also that her dream-world image of what it would be like to meet a movie star had been so shaken when she had met Jake. And her idealized view of love had taken a serious blow in the past few days.

Meredith pulled up in front of her house and hurried into the cottage through the pelting rain. Inside, the air felt close and stuffy. The morning had been hot, but she hadn’t left any windows open. Now the rain had turned the air humid, and the house smelled of mildew. Meri left the front door open so the chilling breeze could run through and freshen up the place. She checked her phone messages and changed into sweats and her favorite slippers.

Elvis was swimming contentedly in his bowl. He bobbed eagerly to the surface when she sprinkled his dinner on the water.

“Would you like to go back upstairs with me, Elvis?”

Closing the front door and heading for her office loft with Elvis under her arm, Meredith knew it was time to throw herself into her work. True, it was Sunday night, and she should finish her Sabbath rest from work. However, she couldn’t wait until Monday morning to read one particular manuscript.

Digging halfway down through the pile of manila envelopes, Meredith came to the two packets bearing Helen’s New York return address. The first manuscript was from an author Helen had pitched to Meredith several times. She put
that one back into the middle of the stack. With curiosity driving her, Meredith pulled out the other manuscript and skimmed Helen’s cover letter.

Yes, yes, you told me it’s a honey
, Meredith silently answered as Helen’s praises of Jake and his screenplay dripped off the cover letter.
Now show me what he’s got
.

Turning to the three-page synopsis, Meredith carefully read Jacob’s own words describing the journey of Young Heart to the city called “Fullness of Joy.” Throughout the journey, Young Heart faced choices. How he responded at each crossroads led him on to the next challenge until he finally reached Fullness of Joy.

Sounds like a video game
.

At the end of the summary, a Scripture reference was listed. Meredith reached for the hardback reference Bible she kept on her desk and looked up Psalm 16:11. She read it once to herself and then again, aloud.

“You will show me the path of life; in Your presence is fullness of joy; at Your right hand are pleasures forevermore.”

Meredith sat back and let the words sink in.
Is this his philosophy of life? Pleasures are only to be found in heaven? Does he think life is nothing more than a journey of choices, commitments, and trials? So the joy doesn’t come until we go to be with the Lord?

Meredith agreed with the concept. After all, the verse did emphasize the pleasure and joy we would one day experience in heaven if we trusted Christ and surrendered to him in this life. But something seemed to be missing. Other parts of the Bible talked about how wonderful life was … didn’t they?

She felt like Pollyanna, ready to go on a hunt for all the “glad” verses in the Bible.

“First things first,” Meredith told herself, moving from her desk chair over to her comfy reading chair. “Let’s see what you have to say, Jake Wilde. Or is this Jacob Wartman speaking?”

Putting her feet up on a stack of manuscripts and settling in with the pages, she said with a smile, “Okay, you cold fish head, prove to me you have a heart after all.”

Y
es, Helen,” Meredith said the next morning on the phone, “you were right. I already told you you were right. It is a honey. Now I’m telling you, it’s almost there, but something is missing.”

“I don’t see how you can say that,” Helen responded. “Gabriel Kalen is behind this project, and it’s going into video production in a few weeks. I told you I have a firm offer from Medina & Beckmann Publishers, but when I talked to Jake this morning, he didn’t want me to respond to them until after we had heard from you. He would rather be with G. H. Terrison, for obvious reasons.”

Meredith flattered herself for a moment that she might be the obvious reason. Then she remembered Gabe Kalen’s close association with her publishing company.

“Look,” Meri said diplomatically, “I stayed up until midnight reading the screenplay over and over, trying to figure out
what’s missing. I couldn’t figure it out. It’s good, Helen, but it’s not great. Not yet.”

“Aren’t you being a little too rigid here, Meri?”

“All I know is that Terrison doesn’t pay me to find good books. They pay me to find great books.”

“Are you saying you don’t want this project?” There was such an edge to Helen’s voice that Meri was sure Helen had dyed her hair jet black today and was wearing black high heels to match. The two of them had dickered well in the past. This was not uncomfortable for either of them. This was business.