We Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus (22 page)

“Actually I was thinking about kids,” he said, because it was true. He hadn’t been able to get the subject off his mind. Ever since the night before, when he’d had dinner with Alex, Mackenzie and Alyssa and enjoyed them almost as much as he had Jaclyn, he’d been imagining what it would be like to have a baby of his own—with Jackie. Raising four small children seemed as terrifying and overwhelming as it always had. But there was something about the thought of a baby that stirred an inexplicable excitement in him.

“Kids?” Rick nearly choked on the peanuts he’d tossed into his mouth and jumped out of his easy chair to save himself. Most of the rooms in his house were bare, but here he had what mattered most—a big-screen television, a great sound system, two easy chairs, a soft leather couch and a coffee table for snacks and drinks and old copies of
Sports Illustrated.
“Whose kids? Certainly not your own?”

Cole shrugged, suddenly feeling irritable, defensive. “Why not?”

“Because you don’t plan on getting married. Isn’t that a little bit of a problem?”

Cole was starting to believe marriage in general wasn’t such a distasteful thing—not if it meant he could be with Jaclyn for the rest of his life—but he didn’t want to say so out loud. He knew what his brothers’ reaction would be and wasn’t ready to take the ribbing. “I wasn’t thinking
about right away. I was just thinking about…someday,” he said.

Chad arched his eyebrows at Rick. “It’s Jaclyn. She’s the one who’s putting these crazy thoughts into his head.”

“See what happens when I leave for a few months?” Rick said, finally sitting back and making himself comfortable in his easy chair. “Cole starts doing the unthinkable—he considers relinquishing his freedom.”

“Don’t you want kids?” Cole asked, wishing he’d never brought up the subject in the first place. It was one thing to think about marriage; it was another to hear his brothers talk about him like he was standing in line with his head bowed, ready to be put on a leash.

“Someday. But I gotta meet the right woman first,” Rick said. He was staring at the screen, watching the Forty-niners punt the ball. “And I don’t think that’s going to happen anytime soon.”

“You’ve got to be doing something with your days and nights,” Chad responded. “What’s the matter? Are you afraid to let whoever you’re seeing meet one of us? You think she’ll throw you over?”

Rick scowled. “The day I lose a girl to one of you ugly bastards is the day I enter the priesthood.”

Cole and Chad both laughed. “Come on. Tell us who she is,” Cole said.

“The only girl I see with any regularity is barely twenty,” Rick told them.

The Forty-niners nearly fumbled. Cole reclaimed his beer from the coffee table and pretended to watch them recover the ball while trying to read his brother’s face.

“Eight years isn’t that big a difference,” Chad said above the voice of the announcer.

“It’s nearly thirty percent of my life,” Rick replied. “Wow! Look at that run!”

They all leaned forward to watch the running back get tackled near the fifty-yard line.

“She still lives at home, for Pete’s sake,” Rick continued. “I bet she’s still a virgin.”

“At twenty?” Chad grabbed a fistful of peanuts. “What, does she weigh five hundred pounds?”

“No. She’s…” Rick whistled low, under his breath. “She’s gorgeous. And she’s a real fireball.” He turned and smiled wistfully, then shrugged. “She’s just too young.”

“At this rate, Andrew and Brian will marry before you two do,” Cole said, then took a drink of his beer.

Rick and Chad both looked at him in surprise.

“Before
us?
” Rick threw a peanut at Chad. “I think he’s making an announcement. What do you think?”

Chad nodded. “That sounded pretty serious to me.”

Cole hadn’t meant to assume he’d marry soon and they wouldn’t. It had just come out that way. Feeling himself flush, he opened his mouth to deny having any immediate plans, but was saved by the ringing of his cell phone. Waving their attention back to the game, he said a grateful hello and was surprised to hear a child’s voice.

“Is this Cole?”

“Yes.”

“This is Alex.”

Alex? Why was Jaclyn’s son calling him? “Hi, buddy. What’s up?”

“Nothing. I found your number on the bulletin board in the kitchen.”

Before they’d hung up last night, Jaclyn had told Cole she’d better not see him today. She wanted to devote herself wholly to her studies. But hearing Alex’s voice made him hope she’d changed her mind. “What are you guys doing?”

“Nothing. My mom’s studying. She’s been studying all day. She has a big test tomorrow.”

“Yeah. It’s pretty important. She’ll get her license if she passes.”

“That’s what she said.”

“Is something wrong?”

“No, I’m just bored. There’s nothing to do around here.”

“What are the girls doing?”

“Playing Barbies.”

Cole couldn’t help but chuckle at the disdain in Alex’s voice. “Would you like to come over and watch the football game with me and my brothers?”

“Yeah!”

“Do you think your mom will let you?”

“I’ll ask her.”

The phone
thunked,
then Alex called to Jackie in the distance. After a moment, Jaclyn picked up an extension.

“Cole?”

“Hi.”

“I’m sorry Alex bothered you. I didn’t know he had your number.” She sounded slightly embarrassed.

“There’s nothing to apologize for,” Cole assured her. “He said he’d like to come watch the game with me. Is that okay with you?”

“You wouldn’t mind?”

“I invited him. Why don’t I take the girls, too? That way you can study without interruption.”

“You don’t have to do that,” she said, obviously surprised at the offer.

“I want to. Maybe once you get licensed, you’ll bring a few of your buyers by Oak Ranch.”
Or maybe you’ll be living there yourself—with me.
“I’ll be over in a few minutes to pick them up.”

“Cole?”

“Yeah?”

“Are you sure?”

“I’m sure,” he said, but he wasn’t quite so sure after he hung up and had to face his brothers, who were giving him their best you’re-so-full-of-bullshit look.

“I’m just helping her out,” he said innocently.

“You’re going to baby-sit her kids?” Rick asked.

“I thought they could play here, while we watch the game. That’s not a big deal, is it? If you’d rather not, I can always take them to my house.”

“It’s not the house I’m worried about—it’s the future.” Rick looked at Chad. “How many kids does she have? Three?”

“Yeah,” Chad responded.

“God, our days of peace are over.” Rick shook his head. “We’d better get fitted for tuxes.”

M
ONDAY WAS BITING COLD
and completely gray, but Jaclyn was smiling when she arrived home after taking her real-estate test. The test had been long, nearly thirty pages containing 350 multiple-choice questions, but she’d done well. She could tell. She’d known most of the answers right away, thanks to Cole’s sample tests and her hours of study.

Wanting to dance and twirl in the yard when she thought about having it behind her, she fit her key into the lock on the front door and was just about to let herself in, when Mr. Alder called to her from over the fence.

“Jaclyn? Alex is riding his bike on my lawn again,” he said.

Jaclyn stifled a groan at letting the man catch her outside, and forced a smile. “I’m sorry, Mr. Alder. I’ll have another talk with him.”

“He really shouldn’t ride on your grass, either. It makes ruts.”

“I realize it’s probably not a good thing, but we don’t have much of a lawn right now, anyway.” Alex was only young for a short time. And there were no other children in the neighborhood for him to play with. What were a few ruts compared to the enjoyment he got out of biking? The lawn had had more than its share of ruts and weeds
before
they moved in. “It’s pretty dry and brown,” she said.

“It wouldn’t be if you threw a little seed out there every once in a while.”

“I’ll try to remember that.” She slid closer to the door and blessed privacy.

“I’ve got seed in my shed. If you like, I can toss some on today.”

This surprised Jaclyn, even though ever since he’d fixed Alex’s bike, Mr. Alder had been almost kind at times. “I’d be grateful. If you’re sure it’s not too much trouble.”

“No trouble.”

She paused when he didn’t turn away, wondering if there was something else. Did he want to return her plate from the lasagna she’d sent a few days ago? The basket from the cookies? Or was he hoping for some little goody for dinner tonight?

“You’ve been busy trimming your roses, I see,” she said, trying to make polite conversation, instead of hurrying inside and closing the door as she wanted to do.

“There’s a certain way to prune a rosebush. You have to know what you’re doing.”

“I bet that’s true. They’ll look nice come spring, I’m sure.”

“I can show you how to prune your roses, if you like.”

“That would be nice. Maybe on a Saturday when it warms up a little?” She glanced above her at the gray sky and wondered if it was going to rain later.

“Saturday’s as good a day as any,” he said.

“Okay, well, I’d better go in. I have to be to work in an hour. Have a nice day, Mr. Alder.” This time she got the door open and had nearly stepped across the threshold, when he called her name again.

“Jaclyn?”

“Yes?” she asked, turning back.

“I don’t know if it’s anything important,” he said, watching her closely, “but some man came snoopin’ around your place ’bout an hour ago.”

“Some man?”

“An older gentleman, ’bout sixty. Drove a Lincoln Towncar.”

Burt!
Jaclyn hadn’t heard from him since Alex’s game on Friday. She’d assumed he had cooled off and let the matter of Cole drop. But what if he hadn’t? Why had he driven all the way from Feld on a Monday morning without letting her or the children know he was coming? “Are you sure it was a Lincoln Towncar?” she asked.

“Sure as I’m standing here.”

“What color?”

“Silver.”

It
was
Burt. It had to be. He was the only sixtyish man she knew who drove a silver Towncar. “What did he do?”

“Knocked on the door. When no one answered, he looked in the windows, then went around to the back.”

“Did you see what he did there?”

“No. I walked over just as he was coming to the front again. I told him you were gone and asked if he wanted to leave a message with me, but he said that wouldn’t be necessary.”

“And then he left?”

“No, he asked me a few things first.”

Jaclyn resisted putting a hand to her stomach to massage the knot of tension she felt growing there. “What did he want to know?”

“If you ever entertain men at your place.”

Briefly, Jaclyn squeezed her eyes shut and willed away the anger that flooded her at the audacity of her ex-father-in-law. He’d gone to her neighbors and asked them about her? God, that rankled.

“And?”

“And I told him you were a dedicated mother. That you rarely entertain anyone and never throw wild parties or stay out late.”

“You did?” Jaclyn couldn’t keep the amazement out of her voice. Mr. Alder hadn’t been happy about having her
as a neighbor. What had motivated him to come to her defense? “Did he ask about anything else?”

“Just a black Lincoln Navigator.”

“What did you tell him?”

“That I’d already told him what kind of person you are. For anything beyond that, he’d have to ask you.”

“Really?” At that moment, Jaclyn could have kissed Mr. Alder’s lined forehead. He might not have taken to having a divorcee with three children living next door at first, but he seemed to be warming to the idea. At any rate, he took to strangers even less.

“And I told him if he comes nosing around here again, I’d call the police.”

Jaclyn couldn’t believe it. Burt must have been fuming when he left. “What did he do then?”

“He got in his car and drove away.”

Grateful for Mr. Alder’s stand, Jaclyn smiled despite her renewed worry and anger. “I appreciate your support, Mr. Alder. That man is my ex-father-in-law, and I think he’s trying to take the kids away from me again. He tried once before, but he could never get anything against me. I guess he’s trying to see if he can dig up something now that I’ve spent a year on my own.”

“Well, he can try and take your kids all he wants, but he’s not going to manage it. You’re a good mother,” Mr. Alder stated matter-of-factly, just the way he stated everything. “I’ve got your lasagna plate, by the way. I’ll bring it by later tonight.”

“Fine. Thanks,” Jaclyn added, but her mind was a million miles away from food or dishes or anything so mundane. Burt was snooping around, asking questions, a sure sign he was on the rampage again. Just when she was pulling her life together, she was going to have to turn her attention to fighting her ex-in-laws one more time. What a mess!

Instead of going in the front door, Jaclyn walked around
the side and into the backyard, retracing the steps Burt had to have taken to reach her back door. What, exactly, had he been looking for? Some sign that Cole was living with her? That Cole sometimes stayed overnight? No doubt Burt would have loved nothing more than to find her home unlocked so he could search her bedroom in hopes of finding some condoms or men’s underwear.

She thought of her overtaxed bank account and all she’d already been through, and wondered how she was going to summon the strength and the money to finance yet another defense. Somehow she’d do what she had to do. She’d pay her attorney in small installments, sign away the next ten years of her working life, borrow what money she could—whatever it took. Terry and Burt wouldn’t take her kids away unless it was over her dead body.

The yard looked normal enough—just grass and a few shrubs enclosed by a wooden fence. There was a small screened-in porch off the back of the house, but she didn’t own any patio furniture, so it usually contained nothing but her stationary bicycle, a toy box for the girls, and Alex’s scooter and in-line skates. Today, however, there was something more. Poking out from under the worn welcome mat at the back door was a manila envelope.

Jaclyn’s hands shook as she retrieved it. She didn’t want any more trouble. She just wanted to be left in peace.

Tearing open the flap, she pulled out the document inside, then wished she’d waited until she was in the kitchen and had someplace to sit down. Burt was making good on his threats. He was suing her again for custody of the kids. But there was something else in the envelope, something she hadn’t expected—a list of women all claiming they’d had an affair with Cole Perrini.

W
HAT WAS IT ABOUT HOLIDAYS
?
First her birthday and now Thanksgiving.

Jaclyn pushed the channel changer on the remote and
halfheartedly watched the news, MTV and an old sitcom. The kids were with Terry in Feld—he’d finally deigned to come for them. And while she was happy that they were seeing their father again, she’d let them go reluctantly. This past week, while she’d been dodging Cole’s calls and pretending to be too busy to see him, her kids had been her mainstay, her only friends, her only support. Now that they were gone, she felt bereft and alone and far weaker than she deemed safe.

Call him.

No! Just in case the temptation proved too great, Jaclyn crossed the room and returned the cordless phone to its cradle, just to get it out of her lap. Then she went to the kitchen and stared into the refrigerator. She wasn’t exactly hungry. She’d had a peanut butter and jelly sandwich a little earlier—there wasn’t any point in making a big Thanksgiving dinner with Mr. Alder visiting his eldest son for the day and the kids gone until Sunday—but she was bored and seeking solace in
something.

Disappointed to find that the foil-covered plate, which had stored the lemon squares she’d made the day before, was empty, Jaclyn settled for a bag of chocolate chips. Carrying them back to the living room, she sank onto the couch and tried to drown her sorrows in chocolate while once again searching for a program on television that interested her.

Nothing, she decided twenty minutes later. There was nothing on she wanted to watch. Nothing she wanted to do. Except to see Cole. She wanted him so badly that she thought she might go crazy if the impulse to call him didn’t stop shooting from her brain to her arm every few seconds.

To bolster her resistance, Jaclyn threw away the empty chocolate-chip bag, went to her bedroom and retrieved the envelope Burt had left at her door. Then she looked down the list of Cole’s lovers again. There were thirteen. She’d counted them the day she’d received it. Thirteen women
who’d written and signed a short paragraph detailing the nature of their intimacy with Cole when he was married to Rochelle. Twelve more than he’d admitted to her. Twelve in nine months! Certainly that had to beat even Terry’s record!

If it was true…But that was the problem, wasn’t it? Jaclyn didn’t know what to believe, didn’t need the second-guessing and pain of getting involved with someone who had a bad track record. The statements looked legitimate, so believable, especially when she remembered what Cole used to be like—wild and reckless and definitely a favorite with the ladies.

Damn Burt Wentworth,
Jaclyn thought, shaking her head. Just when she’d been feeling some hope again, just when she’d been trying to trust love again, he had to plant seeds of doubt.

The doorbell rang, and Jaclyn started in surprise and dropped the list on her bed.
It was Cole.
She knew it instantly, before she even left her bedroom. He hadn’t called since last night, when Alex had told him she was too busy to come to the phone, but it was too much to hope that he’d go through the weekend without some attempt to reach her. He probably wanted to know what was wrong, why she was shutting him out. And she didn’t want to go into it. She’d been through enough of that kind of hell already, with Terry.

“Here we go again,” she muttered, summoning the courage to answer the door.

Sure enough, Jaclyn could see Cole through her peephole. He was standing on her porch in a pair of faded blue jeans and an oversize sweatshirt, holding something in his hand.

For a moment she considered pretending she wasn’t home, but her car was in the drive. Swinging the door open, she offered him a tentative smile.

“Hi, Cole.”

He didn’t return the smile. He studied her, his jaw set. “Can I come in?”

Jaclyn stepped out of the way, and he moved past her.

“What’s going on?” he asked, turning to face her as she closed the door.

She couldn’t quite meet his eyes when she turned herself. “What do you mean?”

“You took your test on Monday and never called to tell me how it went. I tried to call you on Tuesday at work. The woman there took a message, but you never returned it. Then I talked to Alex last night, and again you never called me back.”

Jaclyn didn’t respond.

“Did the kids say something about the time they spent with me last Sunday that upset you?” he prompted.

“No.” Actually the opposite had occurred. The children had loved their time with Cole and had talked of little else since then. “I’m sorry,” she said. “I appreciate you baby-sitting. I should have thanked you earlier, but—”

“I didn’t do it for the thanks,” he said. “I wanted to help you.”

Jaclyn crossed her arms, suddenly feeling chilled despite the sweater she was wearing. “And you did. The test went well.”

“That’s it? That’s all you have to say?”

“What do you want me to say?”

He stabbed a hand through his hair. “Nothing, I guess. I don’t want you to say anything you don’t feel, but if you’re asking what I’d
like
to hear, I’d like to hear that you’ve missed me as much as I’ve missed you. God, Jackie, I’m crazy about you. I sit home at night and think about you, remember your birthday, want to be with you. Do you know what I’d give to make love to you again? Anything! Yet you won’t even return my calls.”

What could she say?
I’m confused? I don’t know if you’ve been lying to me? I’m afraid to take the chance?

“Burt sent me something. I got it on Monday,” she said, when Cole didn’t speak and seemed determined to hear an answer from her first.

“What is it?”

“He’s suing for custody, of course.”

“Why didn’t you tell me? If that’s all it is, I can fix it. We’ll get a good lawyer. I know someone who can help us.”

He said he could fix it, just like that—easily, confidently. He’d used the word
us.
Jaclyn wanted to grab hold of the support he offered like a drowning man longs for breath, but she wouldn’t let herself. Trusting left her too vulnerable.