What a Bear Needs (The Wild Side) (2 page)

“I’m going to ask you again and hopefully the words manage to penetrate the thickness of your skull,” Cree stated before leaning forward and slowly questioning, “Why are you following me?”

He snorted. “You—my incredibly gorgeous friend—are also incredibly narcissistic. Who says I was following you? Perhaps
I
was interested in taking a walk. Perhaps
I
wanted to—ow, ow, ow, that’s my nose!
That is my nose!
”

“One time Maddox and one time only—go. Away.”

His eyes narrowed. “I’m sensing a lot of hostility and frustration. Would you like me to help work this out with an early morning orgasm or—okay, that’s really
starting to hurt.”

Cree let go. “What
do you want?”

Maddox quirked a brow. “I don’t think you really want the answer to that, beautiful. It consists of words that would make all those pretty rouge undertones in your skin all the more apparent.”

She sighed. It was one of the sighs that alerted him to when she was about to lose what little bit of sanity she’d had stored up for the day. “I try with you, I really do. But you make it so hard.”

Blinking, he waved a hand to his crotch. “On this we can relate. Oh look at that, there’re those rogue undertones…”

With a snarl, she hooked her thumb over her shoulder. “Go.”

He peered at her. “Why
do
you come all the way out here alone every morning?” Maddox angled towards her. “Is this the witching hour for you?”

She gave him a sharp smile. “Why, yes, yes it is and it usually consists of sacrifices. Would you like to volunteer?”

“Do I have to be a virgin? Because that would most definitely
be a problem.” Maddox leered. “Unless of course we’re discussing sex magic. Making you call out to the gods at the risk of giving myself a herniated disc is a chance I’m willing to take.”

Cree rubbed her temples. “Maddox. Please.”

Her expression told him that he’d pushed enough and if he didn’t stop, she’d start pushing back but this time it wouldn’t be physically.

He sniffed. “Fine.” Waving a hand around, he said, “This trail is boring anyway. And tedious. My calves deserve much better.”

She rolled her eyes and he turned his back on her, calling out, “Take a good look at this ass as it moves about in fluid, lust inspiring motions! You shall not be seeing it again anytime soon as I am thoroughly offended by not only your arrogant assumptions but your refusal to
at
least
kiss me in proper greeting!”

“Ri-fucking-diculous,” Cree muttered.

“I could be fucking
you
but you’re too busy messing about with your weird ritualistic visits to the forest in between acting as though I don’t make you nipples go ‘Ten-hut!’
on a daily basis.”

If he didn’t know any better, he’d swear he’d heard a snort of genuine laughter but when he turned around, Cree was gone.

“Good morning, beautiful,” Maddox quietly greeted in her absence. He missed her ever-changing scent and the way the sun sometimes made her hair appear as though it were purple already.

With a deep inhale, he made his way back to the main cabins of Wilder Lodge, a vacation resort designed specifically for shifters. It was the source of exactly why and how Maddox had found himself here. Fallon Wilder, alpha of Glenwood Springs ‘mighty Wilder arctic wolves, owned the getaway and happened to be the one who’d tamed his older, much less handsome—if Maddox were telling the story—brother.

Last summer when Ransom McKenna became enamored with the snappish, ridiculously strong she-wolf, he’d drug Maddox along for the ride and through a series of events, they’d made Colorado their new home. This was something that came as a surprise to anyone who knew Ransom. Particularly because the bear had been nomadic in his tendencies from the time he was old enough to travel alone. As the CEO of a real estate development company that catered to the supernatural community in particular, Ransom had never been known to stay in one place for very long and yet, here they were. All it took was one sight of Fallon’s pretty face in a magazine and he’d stumbled right into loving her.

There were some days where Maddox questioned how things could escalate so quickly between two people as he watched the couple and then he’d catch Cree in his line of vision, immediately understanding.

Maddox crossed back over towards the cabins and made his way past shops and restaurants, waving at the employees who were beginning to start their days. He’d just passed the dinner hall when a very familiar looking wolf, fully shifted, shot past him.

The sound of heavy footfalls followed. “Goddammit Fal! We agreed to hunting
after
six a.m. This is morning snuggle time!”

He stopped and looked on as his brother took off after her. Both disappeared behind bushes but soon Ransom re-emerged, shirtless with a wiggling, half-dressed Fallon pounding on his shoulders. “Let me go! I never agreed to morning snuggle time! I need to hunt! I need to be free!”

“What you
need
is an hour bound to the headboard! You’re being ridiculous!
The only reason you’re running is because I mentioned an actual wedding,” Ransom growled.

“You’ll never make me do it!
Never!”

Maddox’s brother rolled his eyes and then caught sight of him. “Morning, little brother.”

He nodded. “Morning, big brother. Need some help?”

“Nah,” Ransom readjusted Fallon on his shoulder. “This one is antsy because the idea of a gown and formal seating makes her nervous.”

“Ahh,” Maddox breathed. “The wee one has cold feet.”

“The wee one,” Fallon snarled. “Is right here and
can hear you!
”

“Quiet, canine!” Ransom barked. He accompanied this by a lovely slap on the ass.
That
was followed by several threats from his mate and Maddox regarded the pair as they headed back to the other side of the lodge.

“Oh, Cree,” he sighed. “That could be us. That could be us…”

***

“Insane, pretty bastard,” Cree murmured to herself as Maddox officially disappeared. The moment his scent trail faded she swung down from the branch she’d been resting on and hit the ground, hunching over when another spasm shook her.

He really needed to stop that; the charming. Particularly because it would get literally nowhere with her. It wasn’t
him.
Cree was just…well
Cree.
She had absolutely no interest in the multitude of promises his eyes held when he looked at her. As far as she was concerned he’d break every last one when he realized who he’d given them to; who he’d been pursuing—someone totally incapable of reciprocating.

Between herself and Fallon, Cree’s alpha had always been the one perceived as emotionless, hard
.
However, in all reality, her friend had a way about her that effortlessly touched others. If Cree touched
anyone
—outside of a select, beloved few—voluntarily then it was because she intended to deliver an unfathomable amount of pain. Not because it amused her or because she took pleasure in it but because hurting others, keeping them outside the small nuances that were solely hers in characteristics, saved her the pain of having them examine her too closely; it saved her from the pain of being almost pushed out again.

Cree had spent the majority of her life dwelling outside the realm of the ordinary, watching as her pack mates, her friends, dove head first into bonds and relationships that couldn’t be broken or damaged. She always remained near that energy, hovering around it the same way cats sometimes burrowed under cars during the winter for heat. The glow that vibrated off those bonds—the love that radiated—skated across her skin in the lightest of touches. Like a succubus, she could feel it, grasp it if she wanted to but chose to leave it to those with hearts that were a lot less fragile than her own. Rejection wasn’t for the weak and in comparison to those around her, Cree lacked in her soul what she had in her hands—strength.

Her sex didn’t make her a vulnerable creature but her experiences and her differences did. She’d seen for herself the prejudice, the fear and the disgust that could be exposed in others if they witnessed who and what she really
was at her core. Her ability to become an entirely different species of mammal wasn’t what the gods had cursed Cree with and there were mornings that she gazed at her own reflection, wishing that it simply
had
been that.

Maddox, no matter how good his intentions were, was a reminder of what she’d never have access to. She avoided and hid from him to tamp down on that reminder, to diminish it but like the grizzly he was forever connected to spiritually, he had Cree locked in his line of vision and clearly wasn’t ready to let her go yet. He needed to though. He needed to let go
now
before it got any harder, any rougher.

She, like everyone else in their pack, had watched the effect his brother had on Fallon. Cree had observed the slow change in her friend’s behavior, the way she melted around her mate. In just a year’s time Ransom McKenna had managed to reduce Fallon’s wariness and induce the desire to show easy and open affection. The tendency to snarl and snap whenever the mood struck her was still there but she was different. Cree had never seen her so content, so happy.
There were times that Fallon smiled for no reason at all, times that she didn’t have to be forced into pack bonding and times that she actually initiated social activity all on her own.

Fallon’s easy demeanor may have had something to do with her brush with death and the realization that there were moments when she needed others to fight for her the way she constantly did for them. The acceptance hadn’t come easy considering that Cree’s alpha previously had a mentality that centered around, “If it doesn’t benefit the pack, it dies.” But Ransom showed himself to be
very
beneficial to the pack. As did Maddox.

Goofy, wonderful, unerringly sexy, Maddox, who she had to stay away from lest she forget and find herself falling onto him while naked and writhing. The longer he continued his pursuit, the more poignant it became that she could never give him what either of them wanted. The stare he cast her when he thought
she was ignoring him...

Cree exhaled and began her walk once again. Just as Maddox assumed, her daily trek before the sun rose had a purpose. There was a build-up within her that occurred each day, one that had to be discharged. Otherwise the results could be…harmful.

A certain grizzly wasn’t aware of exactly what could take place should he linger, hence the reason why she hadn’t entertained his advances the way she normally did. The playful banter had to stop because if it didn’t, he’d witness something Cree was pretty sure he wasn’t ready for. And no matter how much she enjoyed his presence, the mischievous glint in his hazel eyes or the way he
always
smelled like bundles of lemongrass, the best choice was to keep him at an arm’s length.

The second she’d distanced herself far enough away from the lodge, Cree took in a fortifying breath and found a semi dry patch of grass to rest on in the lotus position. With her palms on her knees she allowed her head to fall back, her lids to close and her inhales to even until they were nearly barely perceptible. Her skin felt tight and irritated, the hairs on her nape standing at attention. Despite the fact that she still had Maddox’s scent trapped in her nose and his crooked smile hooked on her mind’s eye, it had nothing to do with him. No, she was wrestling with another beast entirely; many of them.

Cree’s hands balled into fists when that first jolt of agony hit her in the gut. Sweat beaded her brow on the second. By the third, she was panting, determined not to lose this battle; determined that she wouldn’t let this
thing
control her. She controlled
it.
It didn’t get to rule her. It didn’t get to ruin her peace. She wouldn’t let it.

When her spine shifted and realigned, her mouth dropped open in a silent cry, her nails digging small crescents into her palms. She breathed through her nose and waited it out but as each second ticked by, the pain grew in degrees. Cree hunched over when her ribs deviated, tearing at her t-shirt. Her boots were kicked off as her back hit the dirt and she arched upwards with tears in her eyes. Her fingers and palms bent at awkward angles, steadily altering until claws replaced her nails and fur sprouted, changing multiple times.

She shredded her jeans, pulling at the constricting fabric until it released from her fluctuating flesh. Her chest felt as though it would cave in but she bit her lip and forced the sound of misery in the back of her throat down. Ringing bounded off in her ears, black dots dancing behind her lids and still she fought, still she wouldn’t relinquish the right she had to control her own form. The harder she warred with what was in inside, the harder it grabbed a hold of her, tugging and yanking, determined to take her over even if it had to beak her to do so.

Canine’s pierced the bottom rim of her mouth and she yelped at the sting, her claws burrowing into the dirt. Cree gritted her teeth, growled and rolled over to her belly, heaving in gulps of air as every muscle screamed in protest to the changes occurring rapidly. Like shots leaving a gun, they fired off in quick succession. Her vision blurred and shifted as she reopened her eyes. The color and texture of her fur. Her size and weight. All of these danced back and forth in a never ending cycle until she regained purchase and shoved back harder than any of them could.

Her hands balled and pounded the ground. “No! No! No!”

Then finally, gratefully, it stopped
.
The fur receded as did her claws, her body reversing gradually the effects that a confined shift had started. Cree dropped to the grass and didn’t move; too afraid that even a twitch would bring it back, would bring
them
back.

Swallowing, she rolled to her back and stared up at the sky as the sun finally broke through. As she curled into the earth, the sound of her heart hammering in her ears like the bass of a drum, she knew it didn’t matter whether she moved or not; today, tomorrow, next week. They hadn’t left, they’d never leave. They were a painful part of her; ingrained on her soul and etched in her DNA. She could fight, she could attempt to close the door on every single one but eventually they’d win and the damage that they’d leave in their wake would be incomprehensible. The damage they’d already
done
was incomprehensible.