What Love Looks Like (26 page)

As we made
coffee, arguing over its strength—I liked a dark roast and he liked a
light one—we giggled as if nothing had ever gone wrong. I was grateful
for his forgiveness and vowed to make this relationship a priority and not to
question it (or myself) ever again. For the first time in my life, I felt like
a winner, not a loser, and like a woman instead of a girl. I felt as if I were
part of something big, powerful, and divine.

Ryan was
thrilled at the invitation to come to my parents’ house with me. I texted Emily
that I’d be a little late but that everything was fine, and that Max shouldn’t
worry—his car was in one piece. I also asked her to please tell our
mother to set an extra place, to which she replied with a smiling emoticon. I
didn’t have clothes with me, so I fashioned a dress from one of Ryan’s white dress
shirts and a belt over my slender black trousers. It actually looked decent,
and he thought it was sexy, so I rocked it.

“When do you go
back to work?” I asked him as we drove.

“Tomorrow.”

“Of course,” I
said with a sigh. “They work us to the bone.”

        
“If
you hate it so much, quit. You should seriously consider quitting to start your
own business.” He was making it sound a lot easier than it was.

        
“I
wish. I have to sign a new lease on my apartment next month, and the rent’s
going up. I can’t afford to take a hit.”

        
“So
move,” he said casually.

        
“Where
to? Anywhere I go will be the same price for a worse location.”

        
“Move
in with me.” He said it almost as though he was joking, but I sensed that he
was serious.

        
“What?
Are you crazy?”

        
“What’s
so crazy about that? If things go back to how they were, you’ll just spend half
your time at my place anyway. And why pay for two places when we spend all our
time at the condo? We can pool our resources. Plus, the dogs love each other,
and Woody won’t have to stay at the kennel anymore. It makes perfect sense. If
it doesn’t work out, you’re not signing a lease, so it’s no big deal.” He had
positioned it as ideal living situation, omitting all the problems: we’d really
only dated for five or six months, had a disastrous breakup, and had reunited
less than twelve hours earlier.

“I’ll think
about it.” I smiled and looked at him from the corner of my eye. He was smiling
too.

        
We
pulled up to my parents’ house and walked up to the front door. Luna was pawing
through the glass trying to get to us, and I noticed the mistletoe that mother
had hung on the doorframe. I nodded up to it, and Ryan picked up on my
suggestion, leaned in, and gave me an innocent kiss.

“Have you
thought about it yet?” he asked.

I laughed,
walked through the door, and was instantly met with the smell of coffee and my
mother’s famous Italian cookies. Then, with Ryan’s hand in mine, I heard the rest
of my loved ones laughing and opening presents in the next room. It was bliss
to all of my senses.

EPILOUGE

 
Luna
and I officially moved in with Ryan and Woody on the first day of February. I
felt the cycle of my life renew itself again, but this time it wasn’t
challenging or difficult. It was consistent with what I wanted, and it came
with a sense of optimism and productivity. I submitted my resignation notice at
work immediately after the holidays, and with Ryan’s support, built the
foundations of my new event production company. Though I was heartbroken to
leave Maureen, I couldn’t wait for my next chapter to begin.

Come Valentine’s
Day, I
was up and running.
My first big event was one I agreed
to put on for practically nothing, just to get my name out there. It was a
charity event for Hearts for Hounds, a non-profit for rescue group dogs.
Ryan attended for moral support, along
with my parents, who made a
sizeable
donation to the cause, and my brother and sister with their significant others
in tow. It was incredible to have such unconditionally wonderful people in my
corner. Even Maureen and Jenna showed up, and Erica and Stacey sent me a
bouquet of white roses wishing me good luck. I’d never felt more
energized.
 
Contrary to what I’d
expected, the older I got, the better my life got.

The event was a
huge success, and it was the first one for my portfolio as I moved forward in
my career. By the end of the night, Ryan and I were alone again. He stuck
around and helped me clean up after the guests had left and loaded the flowers
in my car so I could donate them the next day. I turned around to collect the
last arrangement of pink peonies and found Ryan down on one knee. Before I
could piece together what was happening, he extracted a tiny blue box from his
pocket. He opened it, and I saw a radiant oval diamond through my misty, teary
eyes. It was a bitterly cold February day; no more than ten degrees outside,
but my heart was on fire.