What the Moon Said (12 page)

Violet was too excited about her sketch pad and drawing pencils to do more than nod at Esther. Walter was roaring a red truck across the floor. But there were two more presents for Esther to open. Two pretty pink barrettes were from Kate and Howard. And a red, hand-knitted sweater was from Ma and Pa.

“It's beautiful! Thank you, Ma. Thank you, Pa.” Esther put down her barrettes and book long enough to slip her arms into the sleeves of the sweater. “Ooooh,” she said. “It's nice and warm!”

Esther took a moment to admire the truck Julia had sent to Walter, the tiny train set he'd gotten from Kate and Howard, and the wood farm animals that Santa had brought him. He and Violet had both gotten new sweaters, too. Walter's was brown and Violet's was green. And, just like Esther, Violet had pretty new barrettes. Only hers were sky blue.

“Breakfast,” Ma announced, and everyone hurried to the table for potato pancakes with raspberry jam and two strips of bacon each. Esther couldn't remember the last time she'd had such a breakfast! She ate and ate until her stomach was too full for even one more bite.

After breakfast there were chores to do. The animals had to be fed and the cows had to be milked even on Christmas. But afterward Pa played old maid and rummy and go fish with Esther and Violet and Walter, so the morning flew by. A bowl of soup for lunch was just right. Everyone was still full from breakfast, and good smells were already wafting from the stove, promising even better things for supper.

The afternoon was quieter. Pa played checkers with Walter, whistling softly all the while. Violet tried out her sketch pad and pencils. Esther curled up with her mystery story. First, she looked at the exciting black-and-white picture at the front of the book. Then she turned to chapter 1, promising herself to read very slowly so the story would not end too soon.

Dinner was simple compared with past Christmas dinners, but it was a feast to them. Roast chicken with onion stuffing, carrots, potatoes, and biscuits. They ate every morsel. Ma didn't have enough flour to bake a pie or a cake for dessert, but she brought out a special gift from Kate and Howard and little Henry. A small box of chocolate-covered cherries! Esther bit a tiny hole in the side of hers and sucked out the cream filling first. Then she sucked on the chocolate. Last of all she ate the cherry.

“Wonderful, Anna.” Pa patted his stomach. “A delicious dinner.”

Esther and the others nodded. “Delicious, Ma.”

Ma's cheeks turned pink. She jumped up to clear the table.

That night they played rummy again, and this time Ma played with them. She won even more often than Pa! Finally Pa put away the cards to sing Christmas carols in German. “O Tannenbaum” was Esther's favorite. She sang along on the words she knew and hummed on the ones she didn't.

Midway through the singing, Ma went to the kitchen. When she returned, she was carrying the gingerbread man Esther had given her. Esther had forgotten all about it! Ma gave the cookie to Pa and he broke off an arm for Walter and the other one for Violet. Then he broke off a leg for himself and for Ma. Seeing the looks of delight on her brother's and sister's faces made Esther glad that Ma was sharing her treat. Finally, Pa handed the biggest piece of all—the head and body—to Esther. “For the little girl who remembered that Christmas is about sharing with the ones you love,” he said.

Ma nodded her agreement, and the pride on her and Pa's faces was like one last and very special gift of the day.

Esther curled up on one end of the sofa to eat her cookie and listen to Pa sing Christmas carols in German. The gingerbread was as sweet to Esther's tongue as Pa's voice was to her ears. She sighed contentedly and wished Christmas Day never had to end.

ESTHER WASHED HER FACE AND REACHED
for the towel. An instant before she put it to her face, she saw the spider that was crawling on it. She let out a startled squeal, threw down the towel, and stomped on the spider, squashing it under her shoe.

Ma, hearing her squeal, turned around just in time to see the spider meet its death. Her face went red. “Why did you do that?” she demanded. “To see a spider before breakfast is good luck! This family could use some good luck for a change.”

Esther cringed. Ma was so angry. “I'm sorry, Ma. I was so scared, I didn't think.”

“You must
start
to think!” Ma said. Then she shook her head and turned away.

Esther bit her lip. She couldn't seem to do anything right lately. Not that Walter or Violet were faring much better. It took little to trigger Ma's temper these days—a lamp left burning, a door closed too slowly, a crumb of food dropped.

The New Year had begun badly and gotten steadily worse. Bitterly cold weather forced them to burn more wood than ever. And the animals ate more food to keep warm. With the woodpile dwindling, the animals' feed going fast, and their own supplies nearly gone, Pa had tried desperately to find work. But no one in any of the nearby towns was hiring. Each time he returned home, his steps were heavier, his back was more bowed.

Pa came in from the barn as Esther was hanging a fresh towel at the sink. He thumped a crock of milk onto the table. “There's not enough to sell,” he told Ma. “Let the children drink.”

So Esther had milk for the first time in weeks. She'd never realized before how good it tasted. Walter must have thought so, too. He drank down his glass in noisy gulps.

“Walter!” Ma scolded.

He ducked his head but flashed a milk-framed grin at Esther when Ma left the table.

Pa drove them to school in the sleigh that day as usual. But his face was solemn when he waved good-bye. Esther's heart ached to see him so sad and silent. She hadn't heard him whistle since Christmas. She hadn't seen him smile in days. She wished there was something she could do to make him happy again. But she couldn't think what that might be. She trudged up the snowy path to the schoolhouse.

“Esther!”

Esther looked up to see Bethany waving from the schoolhouse steps. “Hurry! The cast list is posted!” Bethany yelled.

Esther needed no further prompting. At last they'd find out their parts in the play. She raced past Violet and Walter. “Have you looked yet?” she asked Bethany breathlessly.

Bethany shook her head. “I wanted to wait for you.”

“Well, here I am,” Esther said with a nervous laugh, remembering the lucky spider she had killed. “Let's go see.”

Holding hands, they hurried inside. There was a cluster of students at the back of their classroom. Bethany and Esther wriggled and nudged their way through them. Esther held her breath and squeezed Bethany's hand tight as she squinted up at the list on the wall. But Bethany saw Esther's name before she did.

“You're one of the princesses, Esther!” she said. “You're one of the
princesses
!”

Esther's heart gave a leap. “Really?
Really
?” She pushed a little closer so she could see where Bethany was pointing. Sure enough, it said
Youngest princess: Esther Vogel.
Esther felt her mouth stretching into a grin. Then she remembered Bethany. “What part did you get?”

Bethany shrugged. “I'm a kitchen maid. But I didn't expect a big part. I can't memorize things the way you can, and the fifth-graders always get the small roles. Except for you,” she said, shaking her head in admiration. “You're the only fifth-grader to get a starring role.”

Esther's cheeks warmed. She was pleased but a little embarrassed, too. When she was jostled from behind, she used it as an excuse to change the subject. “Let's get out of here before we're trampled.” They walked back out to the hallway to hang up their coats. “Did you finish knitting your sweater yet?” she asked.

For answer Bethany slipped off her coat and revealed a rose-colored cardigan.

“Oh, Bethany!” Esther gasped. “It's beautiful. I don't know how you had the patience to do it. I'm all thumbs whenever I try to knit. I couldn't even finish the little scarf I started for Margaret.”

It was Bethany's turn to blush. “Mama helped me a little,” she confided. “Especially setting the sleeves.”

“Ten mothers could help me. I still couldn't begin to make something so fine,” Esther said. Giggling, they went back to the classroom.

When Pa picked them up after school, Esther was quick to tell him about her part in the play. He nodded. “Good. Good.” But otherwise he was silent. It was a cold day. Esther gave up talking and burrowed into the straw Pa had piled in the sleigh. It was a little prickly, but it kept the worst of the cold and wind out.

At home, Esther and Violet set their books on the kitchen table. Pa walked past them to the parlor. When he came back, he had the radio in his arms. All these months it had sat silently but proudly on the little table in the parlor. It had comforted Esther to see it sitting there like a promise of better things to come. But now Pa was taking it away.

“Where are you taking the radio, Pa?” she asked quickly.

“To sell it,” Pa replied. “There is a shop in Middleton that will pay a good price.”

Esther and Violet looked at each other in dismay. Esther wanted to beg Pa not to do it. But there was a look on Pa's face that made her keep silent. He strode past them and out the door. Ma never said a word. She did not even look up from the carrots she was scraping at the sink.

When he came home later, Pa's back was very straight. His head was high. He nodded to Ma. “Make a list of what you need. I will take it with me tomorrow morning.”

Ma nodded. There was a look of satisfaction on her face.

Then Pa sat down. He scooped Walter up and bounced him on his knee.

Esther was glad to see the frown was gone from Pa's face. But she was sad to think of the price he'd had to pay to remove it. The radio had been so important to him!

Suddenly Esther cast a sharp look at Ma. She had never liked the radio. Maybe she had thought this would be a good way to get rid of it. Maybe she'd made Pa feel guilty for having something that wasn't useful now and might never be again. Maybe she made him feel he
had
to sell it.

Esther could easily imagine Ma doing these things, especially lately. She felt a flash of anger as she recalled Ma's satisfied nod. How would Ma feel if Pa had sold her sewing machine?

But angry as she was, Esther knew it wouldn't be the same. The sewing machine didn't need electricity to work. And even if it had, it still would have been useful someday for making their clothing and curtains. The radio was only for pleasure. Still, it seemed as if there should've been something else he could have sold. Her gaze swept through the downstairs of the farmhouse—but there were just simple pieces of furniture, things they really needed.

There was nothing so fine—and so unnecessary—as the radio had been.

Esther sighed. It probably was wrong to blame Ma. She was just worried because their food supplies were running low. Still, Esther thought it would be easier to bear the loss of the radio if she thought Ma was sad about it, too. And there was no way to tell about something like that with Ma.

“Now, Esther, tell me about this play,” Pa said. “What are you and Violet to be?”

“I'm going to be a princess, Pa,” Esther said proudly. “The youngest one. I get lots of lines to say.”

“And I'm going to be a lady-in-waiting,” Violet told him happily. “I get to wear a pretty dress and I don't have to say hardly anything at all.”

While they were talking at the table, Ma was at the stove. She was making soup. When it was time for supper, she placed a steaming bowlful in front of each of them. Esther dipped her spoon into it hungrily. The soup was more water than vegetables and had no potatoes or meat. Still, it filled the groaning hollow inside her.

“Can I have some bread, Ma?” Walter asked.

Ma sat down and picked up her spoon. “There is no bread,” she said quietly.

Esther's head snapped up in surprise. No bread? Her heart fluttered strangely. She looked from Ma to Pa and back again. But they didn't look up from their soup. Esther's stomach twisted painfully. Things were much worse than she had thought. It wasn't just that their food was running low. Their food was gone! That must be why Ma had not sent her to the cellar lately. She didn't want Esther to see how little was there. But now she knew. And even the hot soup could not melt the icy lump in her stomach.

No wonder Pa had sold the radio. And no wonder Ma had looked pleased. Esther's cheeks were hot. But not from the heat of the soup—from shame at having such mean thoughts about Ma.

That night in bed, Esther huddled close to Violet. She pulled the quilt up around her ears. It had been so cold lately that Ma had taken to putting extra bricks under the covers before bedtime. The sheets and quilts were warm around Esther's shoulders now, even though the bricks were gone. Mmmm. She turned over and snuggled into her pillow with Margaret cradled in her arm.

Suddenly she remembered the spider she'd killed that morning. Had it brought bad luck or good? She had gotten a big part in the play, so that was good. But Pa had sold the radio, and that was very bad. Pa had seemed happier, though, and there would be food now.

Esther frowned in the darkness. It was confusing. As if good luck and bad luck were all tangled together. She sighed. She wasn't sure of anything—except the next time she saw a spider before breakfast, she was going to leave it be.