When Friendship Followed Me Home (16 page)

49

WHERE'S HALLEY?

“How's she doing?” Mold said Monday during lunch in our regular spot in the cafeteria.

“She's doing great,” I said. The window was open and it was one of those days in early fall when the air forgets it's not summer anymore. Every fly in the city decided to get together that afternoon for a conference around the dumpster.

“I'd like to visit her,” Chucky said. “Not to look at her butt. That wouldn't be right at this point.”

“It wasn't right at the other point either,” I said.

“Coffin, I'm thirteen. You'll understand when you get to be my age. I just want to thank her.”

“For
what?
”

“I don't know. She was nice to me.”

“She's not going anywhere. You'll see her when she gets better.”

“I'd like to come to Read to Rufus again today, just in case.
Sorry. I didn't mean that. I'm sure she's going to be fine.”

“Look, Chucky, maybe some other time. I'll talk with her about it. We'll see, okay?”

Angelina plunked down next to me and took one of my Chips Ahoy! Ronda stood behind her, arms folded. “Damon said you lost your mind,” Angelina said with her mouth full of my cookie.

“What a brilliant observation by Damon,” I said.

“You so did not just talk to me that way. Have you lost your mind?”

“Didn't we just establish that?” Halley inspired me to stand up for myself. The way she was standing up to her cancer. Not hers. It. I took out my phone and took a picture of Angelina. “Pinto said you need to steer clear. Go or I email this to her.”

“You freaking geek. If I get suspended—”

“I seriously don't care,” I said.

“Let's go,” Ronda said.

Angelina got up. “Sorry about your pants,” she said to me.

I rolled my eyes. “Okay, and why would you be sorry about my pants?”

“Seems you sat in some gum.”

I stood up and sure enough my butt and the bench were attached by a long string of Juicy Fruit, it smelled like. “You're brilliant, Angelina,” I said.

“Thank you.”

“No, I mean seriously. You are
so
creative. The whole putting gum on somebody's seat thing? It's never been done before. How did you ever come up with such a dazzling idea? I mean, you are a genius.”

“Smart enough not to sit on a wad of gum anyway.” She was still laughing, like she was genuinely happy about messing me up.

“Shut up, Ange,” Ronda said.

“No, seriously, isn't he like the hugest loser?”

“You know what, Caramello? Coffin's right. You're a freaking
genius.
You're not allowed to hang with me anymore.” She shoved Angelina and headed off.

Angelina chased after her. “
I'm
not allowed to hang with
you?
You have it all backward,
Glom
ski.”

“I hate her,” Chucky said. “Seriously, why does Halley have to get cancer when it should be Angelina?”

“Chucky? Shut the freak up.”

“What?”

“Why does
either
of them have to get it?” I couldn't erase it from my mind, the image of Halley's fuzzy orange beret floating in the toilet.

• • •

When I got to the library for Read to Rufus, Flip and Mercurious were there, but Mrs. Lorentz and Halley weren't. “Is she okay?” I said.

“She has a temperature,” Mercurious said. “Are
you
okay?”

“Of course,” I said.

“She wants us to take pictures. She says to tell everybody she'll be here next time for sure.”

And that's what we did. Still, Brian asked, “But where is she? Why can't she be with us?”

Flip seemed confused too. He kept looking around the room for her.

When we got back to the apartment I showed her the pictures. She kept going through them. “I'm starting to feel better. I feel it working, the medicine, you know? I
feel
it. I'll be at the next one. I will, Ben.”

“Oh, I know you will.”

“For sure.”

“For sure.”

50

IT'S LIKE WHEN YOU BITE YOUR TONGUE

Halley barely said anything during Tuesday breakfast and she didn't eat. “Sweetheart, have some toast at least,” Mrs. Lorentz said.

“I'm fine.”

“I thought you were feeling better,” her mom said.

“I was. But now that I know I'm going to be puking like a maniac in a few hours, I'd rather not waste food.” Her second chemotherapy session was that afternoon.

“Halley,” her mom said, and that was as far as she got.

“Mom, can't you just shut up for like two
seconds.
” She pushed away from the table and stomped to her room and slammed the door. Flip scratched on it and she let him in.

It was weird, seeing her talk to her mom that way. It made me think she was really worried, which got me really worried. “Can I go with her to chemotherapy?” I said.

“No, you can help her by going to school and doing well on your social studies test,” Mrs. Lorentz said.

• • •

I got back from school a little before Halley got home from chemotherapy. Again she went right into the bathroom and threw up. Again I rubbed her back while she puked. Nothing came up, just dry heaves. “Can you put my cap back on?” she said. She liked to wear it backward.

Flip wiggled between her and the toilet bowl and slumped and sighed.

“This is true friendship,” she said.

“He's awesome,” I said.

“Ben, how can you not know I'm talking about you? Idiot. I'm going to Read to Rufus tomorrow. I am.” She heaved again, and then again.

I helped her to her bed. She crashed on it. I took her shoes off and put all her blankets on her. I left Flip with her and I didn't see her until right before I went to bed. I had to take Flip out for his last walk. I cracked the door to let him out, and I looked in to see if she was okay. Her mom was reading to her, but Halley was sleeping. Mrs. Lorentz came out with Flip. She walked with us. “Your aunt Jeanie called,” she said. “She thought you were avoiding her, until I told her about Halley. Ben, are you avoiding her?”

“No. Maybe.”

“I want you to go to dinner with her. I'd invite her over, but with Halley so sick, well, you know. When Halles is better, we'll have a party. I want Jeanie to be there, okay?”

“Okay.”

“Meanwhile, can you give her a call? Please, for me, all right?”

• • •

Wednesday morning Halley was awake and dressed before I was. She was making Flip's breakfast. “I'm taking him for his walk,” she said.

Her mom frowned. She put her hand on Halley's forehead. “Sit,” she said.

“Mom—”

“Halley Lorentz, sit down. If your temperature's fine you can walk Flip.” She went through this tray where we kept all Halley's medical stuff: the blood pressure cuff, the stethoscope, these pills to make her less queasy, these other pills to help with her headaches, a couple of thermometers. Mrs. Lorentz popped one under Halley's tongue.

“This isn't the butt one, right?” Halley said.

“Of
course
not. Sheesh.”

“She's so not sure,” Halley said to me.

We waited for the thermometer to stop rising. Flip poked Halley's leg with his nose to make her watch him do this trick where he stood on his hind legs and sort of
moonwalked backward. Even in her crummy mood, she laughed. She took the thermometer out. “See? Perfect.” She grabbed Flip's leash and ran out with him.

Mrs. Lorentz checked the thermometer and frowned. “Ben, go with her. Make sure she doesn't pass out in the middle of the freaking boardwalk,” except she didn't say “freaking.”

• • •

By the time I got to the elevator, she was gone. I took the stairs down to the lobby. She hadn't even made it to the front door. She and Flip were sitting on the bench by the mailboxes. I sat next to her. She was shaking. “Don't say anything,” she said.

“I won't.”

“I'm not scared.”

“I know.”

“This is just the medicine working. It's strong, so of course it's going to be knocking me out.”

“I know.”

“Yeah.” She caught her breath. “He kisses me awake in the mornings, Flip.”

“He does that.”

“Uh-huh. It's too quiet here, but I'll tell you.”

“Tell me what?”

“It's called rhabdomyosarcoma. There, I said it. Even the name sounds disgusting enough to make you want to
puke, right? Sounds evil? Except it's not. I'm not saying it's good either. It's just like every other living thing, trying to survive. It's simply being what it is, which is a tumor that worms through your guts and then the rest of you like an exploded bowl of spaghetti. Or at least that's what the one they took out of me last winter was going to do. Nobody told me that, but I read it online, in one of the chat rooms. This boy a little older than me said that's what the tumor in him was up to. You want to know what it feels like too, right? Most times, I don't feel it. And then I do. This warmth that's almost a burn, and then it goes away. And then sometimes it's something
completely
different. Like last night it snuck up on me and pounced. You ever bite your tongue? It was like that, except all over my body. Now I'm sorry I talked about it. Talking about it gives it power. I need to keep my focus on the golden stuff. Let's go.”

“Halley.”

“Back upstairs, I mean. Let's go back upstairs. I have to go to bed. I'm freezing. Sorry Flip.” She hung heavy on me in the elevator. “Ben, you don't have to say anything. There's nothing to say. Just hold my hand. Thanks. Your hand's almost warm. It feels really good.”

51

FLIP'S MAGIC

She didn't make it to Read to Rufus that time either. Afterward I gathered everybody together, the kids, parents, and teachers. We walked to the beach. It was a beautiful day. We made a get-well video full of stuff we thought might make her laugh. The kids made goofy faces, inside-out eyelids, huge balls of fake snot made from chewed-up paper, dripping out of their noses. One of the teachers was a gymnast a long time ago, and she did a split and ripped her pants up the butt. One kid hid behind another except for her arms, so the kid in front looked like she had four arms. One of the dads spun his four-year-old daughter in circles and then put her down on the ground, and she was so dizzy she giggled and staggered around off balance like she was drunk. Flip thought she wanted to dance with him, so he did his moonwalk thing.

They all left video messages saying “Feel better” and “We miss you.” Brian's video to her was, “Ben said you promised
you'd watch me read again. If you come I'll give you a real long hug and I'll let you kiss me on the cheek, even though I already have a girlfriend.”

I went back to the library and uploaded the videos and edited them. When I got back to the Lorentzes' Halley was still in bed but awake and sitting up. She was making a sketch of the Golden Tower of Light as it was about to dock with an antenna on top of Mundum Nostrum's tallest skyscraper.

“Hey,” I said.

“Hey.”

“It was awesome today.”

“I'm sure.”

“Everybody misses you.” I handed her my phone. “We made a video for you.”

She handed me her iPad. More charts, more numbers. “It means it isn't working, the chemotherapy. Not at all.” She rolled away. “I have to go to sleep.” I put my hand on her shoulder but she shrugged it off. She cried so hard I thought she'd die of shortness of breath. Flip wiggled into her arms and nudged her chin, and she started to calm down. She whispered things to him and then she got quiet and wiped her eyes and hugged him and he snuggled her, and I left them like that.

Mrs. Lorentz was on the phone, pacing up and down the kitchen. She said, “But what about the experimental drug?
You said it looked promising. Then there's still hope.” Mercurious was in the dining room, working on the model of Luna Park 1905. I sat next to him. “I could use some help with this,” he said. “You have time to give me a hand?”

“Sure,” I said, and we worked on the model together. I painted the smaller buildings with gold dots and put flags on them. Mercurious was hanging a crescent moon.

• • •

The next morning I delivered my coupons alone. Flip was spending all his time with Halley now, and I was glad. When he was with her she was calm and smiled more.

The air was cold, and I whipped through my route and got the deliveries done before sunrise. By the time I was back at the apartment, Halley and Flip were at the breakfast table. She still looked pretty sick, but she was grinning. Flip kept pulling off her socks. She was watching the video we made for her. “I won't miss the next one,” she said.

“I know,” I said.

“Meanwhile, I need you to help Dad tomorrow night. It's the huge bar mitzvah at the Museum of Natural History. I was supposed to assist. I was going to try, but Mom wants me to rest up before we get into this new chemotherapy thing. Dad says not to ask you, that he'll be able to manage, because he knows the whole magician thing freaks you out. But I told him you're a big boy and ready to face
your fears and you'd love to help him. He's unveiling a new illusion. He's been working on it for the past year. It'll be spectacular when he pulls it off. Congratulations, you've been promoted to magician's assistant.” She snapped her fingers, and the sun just peeked over the horizon and nailed us with a gold beam.

“How'd you do that?” I said.

She spun the iPad around. It was on the weather page. Right at the top was sunrise: 6:55 a.m. Right above that was the time of day: 6:55 a.m. “I actually think I might be able to stomach half a waffle this morning,” she said.

“Cool,” I said, and I made us waffles.

• • •

That afternoon Aunt Jeanie picked me up and we headed out to the diner. “I don't want you to feel like you have to do this,” I said. “You know, us hanging out because you think that's what Mom would want.”

“But
I
want to. Do you?”

I nodded and forced myself to fake a smile.

She patted my hand, and then she took her hand away. “Yes. Well, Leo wanted me to, to tell you he's sorry. He really did. He really is.”

I nodded. “How is he, like, doing?”

“Oh Ben, you're so sweet. I'm touched, really. He's going to be okay. I'll let him know you asked about him.” She
chewed her bottom lip for a bit. “Do you mind if I ask how Halley's doing?”

“No, not at all. She's doing great. Seriously. They're putting her on a new medicine, and it's going to do the trick.”

“I'm sure,” she said.

“It is. Really.”

“Oh, I know.”