Henry
“T
hat’s it, Kenneth,” I tell him. “
Feeeeel
the power within yourself.”
He’s stretched out on his bed and I’m giving him the massage of his life. Now, I don’t claim to be a trained masseur, but whatever I’m doing, I seem to be doing it right. He’s so into it. His eyes roll back into his head and he can’t frame his words. I tell him not to try, just to surrender to the feelings and go with the flow. So okay, those are Lloyd’s words, but I like them.
I’ve just finished Kenneth’s hands and now I’ve moved on to his feet, kneading his soles and the balls under his big toes. Every fiber of his body seems to respond: his arms jerk involuntarily, his thighs begin flexing, and his dick stands up as straight as the John Hancock building.
Notice anything different here? Yes, I’m back to escorting, but with a twist. I posted my name and picture online again, with one key substitution. I replaced “Muscle Worship” with “Ecstatic Massage.” Instead of me being on the receiving end of adoration, it’s my client who’s getting the attention.
If I thought there was a demand for my previous services, I was completely unprepared for the response to my new advertisement. I quickly discovered people are yearning far more to be touched than to touch. As the leaders at my workshop in Provincetown had pointed out, we have become a society detached from one another. There is a
craving
for intimacy, for physical connection. It’s a yearning I’ve felt, too, and giving ecstatic massage is far more empowering than standing there as some aloof deity being adored by men on their knees.
It’s been an empowering journey back. Online to restart my Web page, I’d chanced across an Internet review site for escorts. On a whim I’d clicked under Boston and found, to my great surprise, several entries for “Hank.”
“What a beautiful man,” Vernon had posted. “Both inside and out. Kind, compassionate, indulgent. He fulfilled my fantasy with charm and with no judgment whatsoever.” Wrote another man, an anonymous poster: “Too often escorts are thinking only about the money that will be exchanged later on. But Hank was giving as much of himself as I was giving to him.” Which one might he have been?
From Kenneth had come this simple review: “Thank you, my friend. There is not a category high enough to rate you adequately.”
I was staggered—humbled—by the gratitude of these men. Hank had indeed done good work.
But Henry can do even better. I wrap my lubed hand around Kenneth’s cock and begin to slowly move it up and down.
I can’t wait to see Lloyd this weekend, to tell him all about this new success. Part of what has made my new adventures in the skin trade so energizing and empowering is my relationship with Lloyd. We’re so much more suited for each other than Jeff and I ever were. My God, who
knew?
All that time I’d been traipsing around with Jeff, trying to keep up, trying to fit in, trying to be somebody I wasn’t. With Lloyd, I feel at home. I feel complete.
“Henry, you have so much to offer,” Lloyd said a few days ago as we parked our bikes and walked out into the dunes. “You’re good-looking; you’ve got compassion; you’re bright. You’ll find your soul mate. Don’t worry. Trust that the universe will bring him around when you’re ready to meet him.”
He turned and smiled at me then, his green eyes reflecting the sunlight. There’s something about the light on the Cape in autumn. Lloyd pointed it out to me; I’d never have noticed if he hadn’t. It’s got a glow to it, gold and green, as if the angle of the sun reflects off the water in a whole new way. In truth, I’m seeing the entire world with new eyes, and it’s all thanks to Lloyd Griffith.
I understand why he wants to take it slow. Why he brings up Jeff, tries to get me to talk about him. When I reached over once to take his hand, as we were perched on top of a dune with a view of the ocean, he looked at me and said, “We’ve got to be honest with each other, Henry.” I knew what he meant. This is all so new, for both of us. I know he and Jeff have been back and forth together for a long time. I know he cares for Jeff. And despite all my issues with him, I do, too. I don’t want to hurt Jeff. We have to be honest with each other about the obstacles in our way.
“I want to make love with you,” I whispered in his ear.
Lloyd looked over at me and smiled. “Let’s just watch the waves, Henry. That’s making love, too.”
And he was right. Sitting there, holding his hand, watching a fishing boat way off in the distance gradually make its way back toward the harbor, it was almost as if we were making love with all the passion we had on that first day. I closed my eyes and remembered the taste of Lloyd’s lips, the smell of his skin, the sensations I felt as his tongue made circles around my nipples.
“Oh, yes, that’s the way,” Kenneth moans, managing to find his voice.
“Like this?” I ask, a little saucily, already knowing the answer.
I run my hand up and around his erect dick like a corkscrew, kissing the head as I reach the top. Kenneth can just barely croak out a grateful “Yes. ”
I can’t believe how much I’m enjoying giving him pleasure. This whole session hasn’t been about me at all. I told him simply to lie back, that I was going to take him places he’d never been before. I’d been carrying around a little guilt ever since not acknowledging him that night in Provincetown. That last night with Brent. In many ways it seemed the last night of my old life. I’m thrilled to have the chance to make it up to Kenneth now.
I’ve been busy with clients ever since Halloween, and loving every minute of it. Shane’s called twice trying to get together, but I just don’t have the time. It’s like the early days when I first started escorting. Once more, I’m loving my work. Lloyd explained to me about sacred-sex workers, men and women who’ve taken the art of prostitution to a spiritual level, where it’s not so much about genital manipulation as it is reaching the heart and the mind and the soul. I want to take more workshops, attend conferences and seminars on the connection between the erotic and the spiritual, and Lloyd’s promised to get me the information.
Maybe, he suggested with a sly little smile, a smile that touched the very essence of my being, this was my karma. Maybe that’s what all my journeying has been leading toward all along. “Henry Weiner,” he said. “Sacred-Sex Worker.”
I like how that sounds. I don’t care if Jeff would laugh his ass off hearing it. Jeff doesn’t understand. Jeff has never understood.
“Oh, oh, oh, yes,” Kenneth stutters as my massage of his cock grows in intensity.
“You are
loved
, Kenneth,” I tell him. “You are special. You are beautiful. You are part of the whole cosmos of connected beings. Your essence is sacred. You are one with all things.”
“Yesssss!” he exclaims, ejaculating a thick, milky geyser that quickly covers my hands.
I smile.
I love my work.