Why Men Want Sex and Women Need Love (31 page)
Read Why Men Want Sex and Women Need Love Online
Authors: Barbara Pease
There are now mountains of evidence showing how men and women think and behave differently. The following are further evidence of these behavioral variations.
Take off clothing and place it in a sectioned laundry hamper according to lights, darks, whites, synthetic, or natural.
Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. If husband seen along the way, cover up any exposed flesh and rush to the bathroom.
Look at womanly physique in the mirror and stick out belly.
Complain and whine about getting fat.
Get in shower.
Look for facecloth, body cloth, long loofah, wide loofah, and pumice stone.
Wash hair once with cucumber and avocado shampoo with eighty-three added vitamins.
Wash hair again with cucumber and avocado shampoo with eighty-three added vitamins.
Condition hair with cucumber and avocado conditioner with enhanced natural orange-blossom oil. Leave on hair for fifteen minutes.
Wash face with crushed-apricot facial scrub for ten minutes until red raw.
Wash entire rest of body with ginger-nut and sugar cookie body wash.
Rinse hair, taking at least fifteen minutes to make sure that conditioner is all off.
Shave armpits and legs. Consider shaving bikini area but decide to get it waxed instead.
Scream loudly when husband flushes toilet and water loses pressure and goes red hot.
Turn off shower.
Squeegee all wet surfaces in shower.
Spray mold spots with Tilex.
Get out of shower.
Dry with towel the size of small African country.
Wrap hair in superabsorbent second towel.
Check entire body for remotest sign of pimples. Attack with nails/tweezers if found.
Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head. If husband is seen, cover up any exposed areas and then rush to bedroom to spend an hour and a half getting dressed.
Take off clothes while sitting on edge of bed and leave them in a pile.
Walk naked to bathroom. If wife seen along the way, shake penis at her, making “woo-woo” sound.
Look at manly physique in mirror and suck in gut. Admire size of penis and scratch butt.
Get in shower.
Don’t bother to look for washcloth.
Wash face.
Wash armpits.
Blow nose in hands, then let water rinse it off.
Crack up at how loud farts sound in shower.
Majority of time is spent washing privates and surrounding area.
Wash butt, leaving butt hairs on soap bar.
Shampoo hair. (Do not use conditioner.)
Make a shampoo mohawk.
Peek out of shower curtain to look at self in mirror again.
Pee in shower, aiming for drainage hole.
Rinse off and get out of shower. Fail to notice water on floor because curtain hanging out of tub the whole time.
Partially dry off.
Look in mirror. Flex muscles. Admire penis size again.
Leave shower curtain open, wet bath mat on floor, fan and light on.
Return to bedroom with towel around waist. Pull off towel, shake penis at wife, go, “Yeah, baby,” and thrust pelvis at her.
Throw wet towel on bed. Put on yesterday’s clothes.
The old cliché “opposites attract” has probably caused more trouble and breakups among men and women than any other. It implies that a couple will be attracted to each other if the woman likes tidiness but the man throws his clothes on the
floor, if he’s addicted to football but she can’t stand it, if she loves art galleries while he loves discos, and if he’s a teetotaler while she’s nearly alcoholic. All studies that track the behavior, attitudes, and longevity of couples show clearly that although opposites certainly have some attraction value in the initial stages of attraction, it’s a recipe for long-term tension and breakups. Couples who differ in their base similarities and values are headed for divorce.
This is not to say that all couples who have many opposing characteristics and ideals won’t last—a small minority do—but for most opposites, their lives are continually dogged by arguments and disagreements. This makes their joint progress toward any mutual goals slow and cumbersome. When couples have different life goals, they waste valuable time by continually going in opposite directions. David Buss found that the couples who experience the most successful long-term relationships and suffer the lowest number of breakups are those who are similar in race, religion, and ethnicity and who hold similar values or views on social, moral, ethical, and political ideals.
The key, then, to successful long-term partnerships is to search for a mate with similar ideals and values. In other words, find someone who is like you in his or her core values and beliefs.
So which men in the world are seen as the best lovers and who are the worst? In 2005, Bayer Healthcare released a report called “Sex and the Modern Woman,” that surveyed 12,065 women aged over forty from sixteen countries about their level of sexual satisfaction from their men. The countries included Brazil, France, Germany, Italy, Mexico, Poland, Saudi Arabia, South Africa, Spain, Turkey, the United Kingdom, Australia, and Venezuela. Few people can guess who rated as the most sexually satisfied women. It was Saudi Arabian women, followed by Mexican, Spanish, Italian, and Venezuelan women.
Saudi Arabian women are the most fulfilled and the most satisfied overall (92%) and have the greatest overall number in the survey reporting that they are “very satisfied” (64%). Almost all of the Saudi Arabian women believe that their partner’s sexual satisfaction is also “essential” or “important” (97%). Turkish women are least satisfied overall (65%), with just 32% very satisfied with their sex lives.
Saudi women are the world’s most sexually satisfied women
.
Dr. John Dean, a consultant to the study, said that in Saudi and most other Arab societies, sex plays a very important part in marriage; it is a gift to enjoy, and husband and wife have a duty to share it. In the Muslim world in general, sex is reserved to married couples. In the Koran, men are commanded that women are to be respected and their needs are to be fulfilled and that spending time in advance is important. The Koran says, “Let not the one of afore you fall upon his wife like a camel falls. It is more appropriate to set a messenger act.” Another instruction to men states, “Women have rights even as they have obligations in an equitable way.” Saudi Arabian women affirm the importance of sex. They want fulfilling sex and are also prepared to give it to their husbands.
The women who said they were the most satisfied also rated sex highly in their lives. In Latin America, 92% of women rate their partner’s satisfaction as “essential” or “important,” and 91% rate their own satisfaction in the same way; 82% of Venezuelan women rated sex as important in their lives. Mexican women give the next highest rating, with 80% of those women stating that sex is “important” to them.
Only 61% of women in the United Kingdom stated that sex is “important” in their lives, and just 13% of French women felt the same. Around 30% of German women believe that sex is either “not very important” or “not important at all” in their lives, and 32% of Turkish women felt the same way.
Spontaneity in sex was rated as either “essential” or “important” for 92% of Italian women—Poland was a close second at 91%—but only 18% of U.K. women saw spontaneity in their sex lives as “essential.” This was the lowest figure overall.
French women most want an improvement in their sex lives (37%), with 26% “sometimes” wishing for an improvement. Italian women appear more satisfied, with only 4% often wanting an improvement and 14% “sometimes” wanting it.
The least satisfied women in the Western World were Australian women, with 33% saying their sex lives were “not very” or “not at all” satisfying, compared with a global female average of just 16%. Only 26% of Australian women rated their sex life “very satisfying,” and 36% were “somewhat happy.”
A similar poll by the social networking site
WAYN.com
quizzed 10,000 women in fifty countries about who they thought were the best lovers and what they didn’t like about the men from various countries. The survey found that German men were considered the worst lovers in the world because they were too selfish. Second place went to Swedish men, who are too quick, with Dutch men in third place because they are too rough. Americans (too dominant) were fourth, followed by Welsh men (too soppy), Scots (too loud), and Turks (too sweaty). English men were tenth (too fat), followed by Greeks, who were too smelly, and then Russians, who were too hairy. The best lovers were Italians and French.
A woman meets a man in a bar. They talk, connect, and leave together. They get back to his apartment, and she notices that his bedroom is completely packed with sweet, cuddly teddy bears. There are hundreds of cute small bears on a shelf on the floor, cuddly medium-sized ones on a shelf a little higher, and enormous bears on the top shelf
.
She is surprised that this man would have such a wonderful collection of teddy bears and is very impressed by his sensitive side. She turns to him, they kiss, and then they make hot, steamy love
.
After an intense night of passion with this sensitive man, they are lying together basking in the afterglow. She rolls over and asks, “Well, how was it for you?”
He replies, “Help yourself to any prize on the bottom shelf.”
Science has finally come up with its own answer to palm reading. Studies now show that everything from sporting prowess to academic ability and from sexual orientation to susceptibility to disease can be assessed by your finger length.
Here’s a hands-on experiment you can try right now. Hold your hand in front of your face and try to keep your fingers absolutely straight. Now notice the difference in length, if any, between your index finger and your ring finger. The ratio between your index finger and ring finger has been shown to be linked to exposure to the male hormone testosterone in the womb.
Typical female-finger ratio.
Typical male-finger ratio
On average, men tend to have longer ring fingers than women, who have longer index fingers. The higher your testosterone, the greater the length of the ring finger and the more “masculine” any baby born with this ratio will be, regardless of whether it’s male or female.
It has been known for some time that people with longer ring fingers tend to excel on the sports field, especially in running and football, and science now shows why—the ring finger has a greater number of testosterone receptors than do the others. The index finger has a larger number of estrogen receptors. A high level of testosterone is what drives people into certain professions, is responsible for sexual orientation, and determines your sex drive.
A person with an index finger shorter than the ring finger will have had more testosterone while in the womb, whereas a person with an index finger longer than the ring finger will have received more estrogen. These studies throw light on why women who have a longer index finger are more likely to be more fertile than women who don’t. The difference in the
lengths can be as little as 2 to 3%, but it makes a significant difference to someone’s masculinity or femininity.
