Wild Darkness (A Bound By Magick Novel) (15 page)

Again, she knew what he needed. Stopped her own worry to comfort him. She couldn’t deny what they were to each other any longer. But first he had to finish making his point.

“No one dreamed he would do such a thing. He was my cousin. I’d grown up with him. His father is my uncle. But he wanted more, and unbeknownst to my uncle and my family, my cousin had been giving information to our enemy in exchange for the promise to be able to run Leviathan once we were defeated.”

Her lip curled and he loved her more for it. Such a thing would be utterly unthinkable for her. But it wasn’t for others and he said so.

“You know your path. You are righteous and would give up your very life to protect those you’re sworn to. But not everyone else is. You can only do so much, remain vigilant but also understand that sometimes people do things that are heinous and senseless. I can’t let you take responsibility for this situation in Indio. You made a choice. One
I
would have made, as it happens. Someone you trusted betrayed you. But the Magister? Even if those witches had been in your living room they might have disappeared. We know that. All you can do is to move on.”

“I can’t afford you,” she whispered.

“It’s too late for all that. I should also tell you that Tila is my mother, I’m half demon. They imprint on mates as well. You’re it for me. I know this with all my being. Tell me you don’t know the truth of what’s between us. Go on. I dare you. There are things we sometimes can’t explain but we know they’re true anyway. You are mine. I am yours. You can’t deny it. You’re too honest for that.”

Helena knew she should lie. Should push him back and insist he give her time and some space. He might even do it. But what she really wanted, so much it scared her, was to believe in what he said. To let herself believe that connection she did feel between them.

There was no one in the world who was anything like Faine. No one she trusted the same way.
But
.

“What about Lydia? You were married. Lark said that her life span was altered, would be far longer now that she took the bond with Simon. What happened with her?”

“I loved her. Very much. But she was not my
Ne’est
. This thing between us—the thing Seymeon and Lark have—it’s forever. There are many kinds of love. Surely you know this. What I felt for her was deep. And she’s someone I’m glad to have had in my life. I miss her even to this day. But you? I need you like I need to breathe. You’re who I think about when I open my eyes in the morning. I not only can imagine you in my life a hundred years from now, I
want
to. I knew there was another level of love. I see it with my parents. I see it with Simon and Lark. I feel it now. I understand it now. Are you afraid you don’t love me that deeply? Or are you afraid you aren’t worthy of such a gift? Be honest now.”

Why did he have to be so freaking in tune with her? He was so raw, so emotionally truthful with her that it made it impossible to evade his questions. “I’m freaked the fuck out that I’ll let you down.”

He kissed her and she wrapped herself around him, holding on tight, reveling in the feel of his body against hers.

He lifted her, taking her to the bed and putting her down carefully. “It’s okay to be worried about that. I worry about that too. If we weren’t worried, if we took it for granted, our bond would be meaningless, right?”

“I’m bad at this.”

He shook his head. “I already told you that boy you were engaged to isn’t the same. Tell me truly, Helena. Did you ever feel for him the way you feel for me now?”

“Not a fair comparison. You’re a man. You’re big and braw. So sexy it gives me butterflies and makes me think about sex at the most inopportune times like while I’m driving or in a meeting. You distract me and make me laugh. You fight so well I want to start a fan club and make you teach me everything you know so I can be better. Though, you also make me want to give you a chop to the throat to shut you up.”

He laughed. “So much flattery.”

“I did punch him. My ex, I mean. Right in his mouth when he called Lark a stupid whore. Imagine that! But while I was sad that our engagement was over, it was more that I was angry at myself for failing. And embarrassed that everyone knew it. He never gave me butterflies. I never thought,
Faine will know how to deal with this
. Well, obviously with his name instead of yours. I never counted on him. I’m older. Hell, it feels like the Magister aged us all at least ten years. But you’re four hundred years old and you’ve been married and you have so much more experience at everything than I do and I don’t know if I can be as good at this as you are.”

He laid next to her, pulling her closer and she went. “I’m as new as you are at this sort of love. We’ll have to make it through and trust each other. Will you then? Admit you’re my
Ne’est
and go through the binding with me?”

“One step at a time. How about yes, I admit that what this is between us is deep and strong and whatever you want to call it. The binding part can come in a bit. I need to get used to it. I’m a control-freak planner. I need to know exactly what it is and what it means. I haven’t even met your parents yet. My dad thinks you’re too old for me.”

He laughed. “I am. But too bad. He’ll have to accept me. I’m nicer than Simon and he gave them his blessing on their binding.”

“Fathers are not always rational when it comes to daughters.”

“I suppose I’ll find out one day. But for now, we should practice.”

He stole her breath as he grabbed the front of her blouse and pulled it apart. Buttons went flying and she couldn’t find any energy to be mad that he’d destroyed a favorite shirt.

He bent his head and pressed a kiss against the curve of her breast, over her heart. He was hot, radiating waves of warmth against her bare skin.

She managed to drag in a breath. “Is that why you’re always so hot then?”

“Mmm?” He traced the edge of her bra with his tongue and she nearly forgot her question.

“Your demon half. Is that why you’re so hot?”

“Ah. Yes. In part. Lycians already run a great deal warmer than humans do. When I’m . . . excited, I get even hotter.”

She managed to lever her legs and get on top of him, straddling his body with hers. “I noticed you were warm. You know, when we were together yesterday.” Had it only been a day? So much had changed. “Lark mentioned Simon’s skin was warm, I just figured it was . . . well. Anyway.”

“Are you going to share details of our sex life with your sister?” Nimble fingers parted her with her bra.

“Maybe. We’re very competitive. Only the good stuff, of course.”

He flipped her to her back and stripped her pants, weapons, socks and underwear from her body in record time. She lay there totally naked, nearly panting as he looked down at her with so much naked hunger in his gaze it sent a shiver through her.

“It’s not all good stuff? I must be falling down on the job.” He said it in a low growl of sound that crawled along her skin like a rough caress.

“So far the only bad thing is that I’m naked and you aren’t.”

In a flurry of movement he got rid of his clothes and dived back to the bed, making her laugh.

“How’s my scorecard now?” He licked over her left nipple.

“All tens.”

He laughed, kissing his way over to her right nipple. “Yes, all tens indeed.”

She pushed his shoulders. “I want you on your back.”

He gave her a raised brow. “Is that so?”

“I’ll make it worth your while.”

He rolled, bringing her with him.

“I have no doubt you’ll make it worth my while. You’re infuriating in your ability to get yourself into trouble in every way imaginable, but you’re perfect in my bed. However you’re in it.”

“Man, you’re good with the compliments.” She bent and whipped her hair against his chest, loving the way he groaned as she dragged it across his skin. She kissed a trail over all his marks. Over his ink and his scars. Over all that muscle. He tasted so right.

She scooted back, kissing her way down his belly, pausing to really take in just how ridiculous it was. “Are you doing like eight thousand crunches a day in secret? I’ve exercised with you and my stomach doesn’t look like this.” She licked over each of those six bands of muscle.

“Your stomach isn’t supposed to.”

He hissed when she grabbed his cock at the root and pumped her fist a few times.

“I have some suggestions about what you could do with that. If you like.”

She bent, licking over the head and around the crown. “Like this?”

“That’ll do, gods yes.”

Helena took her time, learning him. Getting to know the feel of him and what he liked. His thigh was hard against her palms as she kept her balance. He had great legs. Powerful thighs leading to a fabulous ass.

“Okay, enough,” he said with a snarl and she landed on her back.

“Hey! I wasn’t done.”

She swallowed her next sentence as he kissed his way over belly, licking over each of her hip bones and the sensitive hollow there. And then he spread her thighs wide, kissing from the knee up to the seam where her leg met the rest of her body.

She slid her fingers through his hair, tugging upward. Wanting more.

He took a lick and then one more. Another. The heat of his mouth against her clit so good it was nearly too much. But he didn’t stop. He stretched her with clever fingers and that mouth of his, driving her so hard she nearly sobbed. She arched, wanting more, but he drove her to the edge and backed off. Time and again, the cad!

“Please,” she whispered.

He hummed his pleasure then, moving back to her clit, staying there with little licks and sucks until she flew apart so hard she was still coming as he began to slide into her body.

She would have remained boneless until he rolled. “You wanted to be on top. Show me what you’ve got.”

Waking up as he filled her, she slid the rest of the way down, taking him fully, her nails digging into his sides. He hissed, but it wasn’t a bad sound. That hiss was laden with pleasure and she ate it up.

Her magick rose, filling the space between them, and his responded. She’d never felt anything like it. Even the first time they were together it hadn’t been like this. It seemed to pour from her, twining with his until it made something altogether different. Better.

His eyes widened.
“Alamah,”
he murmured. “Beautiful. You’re perfect.”

She swiveled a little once she’d seated herself totally and then pulled up, starting that slow descent again.

Over and over until she forgot how to focus and there was only the two of them. The scent of his power and magick filled her senses. The forest, yes, but something else, something uniquely Faine. A musk that shot straight to her nipples and parts south. She wanted to rub herself all over him to get more.

His hands caressed her breasts, palmed her nipples before he pinched and tugged. She nearly begged, it felt so damned good. But she didn’t need to beg because he sent one of them down her belly, petting over her pussy before he parted her, sliding the pad of his middle finger over her clit until she reared back, arching, taking him deeper as she came.

It wasn’t more than two gasped breaths until he joined her on a growl of her name. On and on until she could do nothing but fall to the side and pillow her head on his chest as they worked to get their breath back.

“What did you say? Alma?”

He kissed the top of her head. “I called you
Alamah
. It means . . . something close to beloved.”

She smiled against his skin. “Aw, that’s lovely. So lovely I won’t even be grumpy with you over ruining my blouse.”

“You’re so beautiful I couldn’t wait. I tell myself I will. But then I’m reduced to a starving man and you’re a buffet and all I can do is gorge and gorge.”

Man, he was so good at that. A woman could get used to all those compliments. And that body, too.

TOSH
had tried to work. Had checked his messages and read through a ton of email. Read several bills. And all throughout, he couldn’t stop thinking about the entire situation.

He’d put a call in to the president’s chief of staff, requesting a meeting. Marlon Hayes was courting disaster. Not just for Others, but for everyone. If this Magister . . . thing . . . could simply evaporate Others, what if it decided to put attention on humans too?

Listening to these turned witches and mages seemed an incredibly bad idea. Junkies and criminals? People like that would only be interested in what was good for them. Hayes was banking the future of the country, of all Americans, hell, of everyone on the planet on this plan.

He picked the phone up and dialed home.

His grandmother picked up. He knew she’d still be awake. She was a night owl and caught up on all her shows on the DVR after his grandfather went to sleep.

“Hey, Grandmother.”

“Toshio, I was just thinking about you. I saw you on television yesterday after the bombing. I’m glad you’re all right. Is your friend, the witch who saved all those people, okay?”

“I was scared to death when I saw how badly injured she was. But she’s better today. She used a lot of magick to help the bystanders.”

“She’s a good friend to have. Someone with courage like that. Your grandfather and I are very proud of you for doing this.”

“This?”

“All these laws to put Others in camps and take away their rights. It’s not what this country is about. You need to continue to stand up and say so. We didn’t raise your father to be silent in the face of injustice, and he and your mother didn’t raise you that way either.”

“We made mistakes sometimes.”

“America? Oh yes.” She laughed. “Lots of mistakes. Hurt people. But each time we learn something else. We learn to stand up and remember what we are supposed to be about. We may fall down from time to time, but it’s always those voices, the ones like yours, who refuse to be silent in the face of oppression, who make the biggest difference.”

He’d needed to hear it. His parents were supportive. His siblings too. They’d all been outspoken on the issues with Others and human rights in general. Over his whole life. But it was scary as hell to stand up sometimes when it felt like everyone else disagreed. When people were willing to kill Others and those who supported them simply for wanting to exist.

“You’ll be home for your grandfather’s birthday dinner?”

“Yes. I will. I may be bringing someone this time.”

“Really? Tell me about her.”

“It’s Delilah Sperry.”

“Oh, the pretty senator from Illinois. I like her. She’s got smart eyes.”

“She does. I finally made a move after sort of having a crush on her for the last year.” Probably longer. He’d met her at a freshman senate mixer when she’d first been elected and had liked her instantly. But he’d been dating someone at the time.

“There’ll be plenty of food and we’ll be so happy to see you. It’s been too long.”

His family lived in Sacramento, and while he’d been in town a lot over the last months, he’d only been able to stop in for brief periods before he’d had to get back on the road again.

But family birthday parties were sacrosanct. Having so many family members in the military and now that he was in the Senate, they all tended to travel a lot. But they all made every effort to get back for birthday dinners, especially his grandparents, who knew how to throw a big party. Delilah would like it.

He heard movement in the room next door and realized she’d come back from the meeting at Cascadia.

“You’re all right?”

“I’m fine. Grandpa is fine. You stay safe, do you hear me?”

“I do. And I’ll see you soon. I love you.”

“I love you too.”

He hung up and jogged into the bathroom to brush his hair and teeth, knowing she’d be knocking on his door soon.

As he thought, she tapped on the connecting door a few minutes later and he let her in, smiling at the sight of her in jeans and a T-shirt instead of a suit.

“Come in. I have some beer in ice and I’ve already decided what I want from the room service menu.”

She sent him a smile. “Hungry are we?”

“God yes. I cheated and ate some crackers while answering what feels like a million emails.”

“I have no idea where you put it.” She looked him over before she picked up the menu to scan it.

“Nervous energy, I guess. I’ve always had a fast metabolism.”

“One of the plusses of being a shifter.” She grinned and he couldn’t help it, he leaned across and kissed her. Her initial surprise washed away as she opened to him, kissing him back until the taste of her dizzied him and he pulled back.

“I love your grin.”

“What made you finally make a move? First, before you tell me, order food because I am also starving.”

He grabbed the phone and ordered their dinner.

“Twenty minutes they say. I was just telling my grandmother that I’ve had a crush on you for the last year. Maybe longer. Okay, probably longer. Like since the first time I met you.”

“Freshman senatorial mixer. You had on a gray pinstripe suit with a navy-blue tie. My first thought when I saw you was that you were even hotter in person than you were on television. And then that you had great hair. Then I remembered you were dating some pretty face who read the news on cable. I questioned your taste for a while.”

He snorted a laugh. “Yes, at the time I was dating someone. Casually. Then I guess I let the fact that we’re both in the senate keep me from making a move for a while. But I realized after Molly was nearly killed that it was stupid to hold back any longer. We don’t know when our last day will be and you were a regret I didn’t want to have.”

“I told my sister two weeks ago that if you didn’t hurry up and make a move, I was going to.”

“I’m almost disappointed I didn’t wait for that. Want a beer?” He indicated the ice bucket.

“Yes, god yes.”

He liked the way she moved. Graceful and powerful all at the same time. She sat on the small couch, clinking her bottle to his when he came to join her.

“How did the meeting go? Or I mean, if you can tell me.”

She licked her lips. “Before I tell you anything about the meeting I want to say this. There will come a time when you have to pick a side. That time for me came tonight.”

“I’ve already chosen the side of the Others. I’ve spent the last months doing nothing but working on this cause.”

She shook her head. “That’s not what I mean. Toshio, this . . . Things aren’t . . .” She sighed heavily. “This has moved past bills and speeches. We’ve tried that. They’ve responded with multiple attempts to murder anyone speaking out and by killing innocents all across the globe.”

“I’m a United States senator, Delilah. I can’t just carry a banner for civil war.”

She rolled her eyes. “I’m a senator too. And this middle ground you’re trying to hold is getting smaller every day. I’m just saying, straight up, that there will be a time when there’s nowhere left to stand and you will have to step to one side or the other.”

“Surely you can’t endorse civil war! I choose to believe the process can work.”

“That’s a pretty fantasy. The process isn’t working. I can’t endorse a situation where a significant portion of our population is openly abused, assaulted, murdered and mistreated for something like being a witch. I wouldn’t have done it no matter who the group was. The time to wring my hands and hope those in power do the right thing has passed.”

“Change takes time.” He didn’t want to face it. Didn’t want to hear it. But she was made of sterner stuff and continued.

“Time. Bah. The president is doing
nothing
. Half the
time
the local authorities do nothing to respond to the attacks on Others. How much more do you think we should take? Hm? Do you think we would go into camps? I know what your family did and I respect that, but that’s not a choice I’m willing to make. I won’t send my parents into a camp and see their lives upended because the government is too weak to take a stand. Or worse, too weak to stop that sort of backslide into a world where it’s okay to put people into camps because they’re different. It’s not going to happen. These groups like PURITY are hate groups, plain and simple. It’s time someone in the White House said so.”

“I called President Sullivan’s chief of staff to request a meeting. It’s not that I disagree with you. I don’t, as it happens. But I’ve got to try as long as I can to do things the legal way.”

“I understand. I just want you to see . . . I want you to realize you’re going to have to choose.” She shrugged. “The Others are organizing militias and police function patrols. And special teams. Did you know many military special ops teams have Others on them?”

“I didn’t, but it makes sense that Rangers, Recon and SEALs would attract Others. Witches are the highest functioning control freaks I’ve ever come across, and believe me, I know control freaks. Speaking of that, are you free next weekend? My grandfather’s birthday party is coming up. I thought you could meet the entire Sato clan.”

She blinked and then smiled. “Yes, yes, I’d like that. Crafty topic change, by the way.”

“I wanted to ask while I remembered it. You’re busy, I’m busy. I just wanted to . . . and yes, change the subject.”

The food came and they steered away from the subject of Others for a while and just got to know each other as Toshio and Delilah. But he knew she was right. He would have to choose someday very soon.