Wildflower (24 page)

“All class,” sighed Walton as he smiled and
headed for the barn.

Abby was driving pretty fast and Hazel was
getting concerned. “Abby, what is it?”

Abby sighed and slowed the car. “Hazel honey,
there is a lot you don’t know about me.”

“Whatever it is doesn’t matter to me. Go
ahead and let it out so we can say goodbye to it forever.”

“And therein lies my biggest fear,” sighed
Abby. “Hazel, I’m a girl with real problems and you need to know a
bit about them before you commit yourself to me. You see, I have
some real issues around abandonment. Listen now and bear with me,
it’s a bit of a story.

“Little Abigail Aislin MacKai was born in the
Outer Hebrides of Scotland. By the time she was five, her father
moved the whole family to Montreal. Two years later her parents
divorced, father going west to eventually remarry, and mother going
east to get drunk and stay that way. Grandmother MacKai had come
with the family to Canada and had landed a great job almost at
once. When the family split up, she stayed in Montreal and Wee Abby
stayed with her.

“Once out of high school I went to work for a
firm in New York. They needed someone who could speak French so I
was in. My boss was sweet and he furthered my education as well as
paid me very well. He and his wife practically adopted me. There
were a few passes at romance, but nothing special.

“Eventually Harry sent me to San Francisco to
set up a branch office. It was shortly after that I met Randy.”

“Uh oh,”

“Uh oh, is absolutely right,” sighed Abby as
she slowed the car even more. “I fell head over heels in love with
him, or so I thought. He was a handsome law student with long term
career plans. For several months we were always together. I was so
convinced that he was going to marry me. I had stars in my eyes, a
song in my heart, and my brain in my pocket. I could see myself at
his side while he went from law practice into politics and on to
the senate. It all seemed so perfect; I did not see the warning
signs.”

“Warning signs?”

“He never introduced me to his family, never
once to any of their friends, and whenever I would mention marriage
he’d just change the subject. Anyway, to make a long story short, I
got pregnant.”

“Oops,”

“Big oops,” sighed Abby again as she let the
car slow even more. “I told him and he literally ran away from
me.”

“Oh no,” whispered Hazel. “Just like I
did.”

“I searched for him for three weeks,” Abby
went on, “but he avoided me completely.” Hazel’s head was down now
and there was a tear in her eye. “It was about then that I thought
I had the worst day of my life,” said Abby. “I woke up in terrible
pain and just made it to the bathroom in time for my body to abort
the fetus. I lost a lot of blood, but managed to clean myself up
and get to my doctor.”

“Oh dear gods, Abby,” sniffed Hazel as she
reached for Abby’s hand. Abby squeezed Hazel’s fingers and
continued. “The doctor patched me up and told me to rest completely
for two weeks. I took a taxi home and Randy was waiting for me. He
didn’t say anything; he just put me in a car and took me to meet
his father. What a completely odious little man. He would neither
meet my eyes, nor would he acknowledge my hand as I introduced
myself. He told me my little ploy wasn’t going to get me into the
family fortunes and made all kinds of threats. They made me sign
papers saying I didn’t know who the father was then they gave me a
cheque for fifty thousand and sent me home.”

“Goddam rotten sons of...”

“There’s more,” sighed Abby as she squeezed
Hazel’s fingers again. “When I got back to my apartment I found out
that they had been busy calling in some very big favors. There was
a man there from the immigration department. He pulled my green
card then gave me the deportation papers and a plane ticket to
Halifax. I had three days to pack up and leave the country.”

“Oh my god, Abby,” breathed Hazel, tears
filling her eyes, “what did you do?”

“I emptied my bank accounts, packed all my
stuff and mailed what I could to my mother in Halifax then caught
the plane. Once I landed I spent several days in a hotel just
resting up then I went back to the airport and took the first
flight out. It dropped me in St. John’s. The next day I bought the
old place where I live now.”

“Oh my poor Abby,” sniffed Hazel as she
squeezed Abby’s hand as though she would never let it go. “My poor
baby.”

“Well, that’s my story sweetie, still want
me?”

“More than ever,” whispered Hazel softly.
“You are so strong Abby. I don’t know how you managed to hold it
together.”

“Who says I did? Hazel, I wrestle with
depression; mind numbing, brain chilling, suicidal depression. I
have medication for it, but I try to save it for the really tough
times. That day I was trying to decide what I should do, take the
bottle of sleeping pills and drift away, or take the happy pill and
get on with life. I was about to swallow the sleeping pills until I
remembered my grandmother’s favorite saying. ‘Living well is the
best revenge.’ I took a happy pill instead and here I am.”

“Abby, what it must have done to you when I
vanished like that,” breathed Hazel with tears in her eyes
again.

Abby pulled the car off the road and turned
to take both Hazel’s hands in hers. “Hazel honey, that was truly
the worst day of my life. When I couldn’t find you I wanted to die.
I sat in my chair for several days and hardly moved. When my
neighbor found me I still hadn’t washed the make up off my face
from that night. Wanda brought me around and helped me discover
what had happened. Hazel I swear to you, the thought of losing you
was far worse than what Randy and his father did to me. If you
still want to marry me, it has to be forever.”

“Oh yes, my little wildflower,” Hazel smiled
through her tears as she squeezed Abby’s hands tightly. “Once I
have you tied to me, I will never let you go. You are surely the
one Abby, for I can’t get you out of my thoughts, and I haven’t
since I first saw you over a year ago. Your beauty is only matched
by your intelligence and your courage. I would consider myself
blessed beyond measure to spend my life with you.”

“Then you are mine Hazel Fillmore,” laughed
Abby as she hugged Hazel fiercely, “and I’m keeping you. Now let’s
go get you a new dress.”

“Abby, there are thing about me too,” said
Hazel softly as Abby pulled back out onto the road.

“Let me guess. The young Hazel Fillmore is a
closet lesbian, trapped on the farm, and she longs to escape. She
moves to the city and there follows a few years of sex, drugs, and
rock and roll. Tiring of it all she returns to being herself and
tries to find where she really fits in. There follows a book of
photographs, and that leads to a fateful meeting with a certain
blonde bomber.”

“In a nutshell,” laughed Hazel delightedly.
“The details can wait, but that’s it in a nutshell.”

“Hazel, I don’t care about your past,” said
Abby gently, “I just want to spend the future with you.”

“And so you shall my love, so you shall.
Abby, can you tell me something?”

“Sure sweetheart, what would you like to
know?”

“Where do you get all those great retro
outfits?”

“Ok, I’ve always loved playing dress up,”
laughed Abby as she pulled back out onto the highway. “When I
bought the old house it was crammed full of old furniture and
clothing. It seems that the owner had inherited a house full of
things from an elderly relative and moved it all into her house
hoping to go through it, but she had a stroke and was unable to.
Eventually she passed away and the place was sold to me, bag and
baggage. It all seem so sad to me that two women’s lives all came
down to a house full of stuff that everybody was in a real hurry to
get rid of. Two lifetimes of experience gone and not one single
soul left to care.

“I decided that I would do what I could to
honor the memory and life of the woman whose house I bought. Her
name was Bride Murphy and I try to do as I vowed. She had some
wonderful clothes and I had several outfits altered to fit me.
There is still a lot from the other woman still untouched. She was
a lot taller than me, but I couldn’t bring myself to give them
away, the clothes are so beautiful. You know what? I’ll bet some of
it could be made to fit you.”

“Are you serious?”

“Of course I am,” laughed Abby, her bright
mood fully returned. “When you come out to the place we’ll spend a
day playing dress up, what do you say?”

“Oh Abby, that sounds like such fun. I’ve
always wanted to be a clothes horse, but never could afford
it.”

“Well we can now and I insist. We start right
here right now.” She was pulling into the parking lot of a shopping
mall in Amherst as she spoke. She stopped the car and opened her
purse. “Use this,” she said passing Hazel her credit card.

“Oh Abby, I couldn’t,”

“Better get used to it sweetheart. As soon as
we’re married I’ll get one with your name on it for you.”

Hazel gazed into Abby’s eyes for a long
moment, the love she was feeling clear on her face.

“Abby, am I to be your kept woman?”

“Hazel, I proposed to you and I fully expect
to provide for you. You did say you wouldn’t try to uproot me, and
that is way too far to commute to St. John’s; besides, I want you
to concentrate on your photography.”

“You really mean this?”

“I really mean it Hazel my love,” replied
Abby as she squeezed Hazel’s hand tightly.

“Then the name on the credit card should be
Hazel Elaine MacKai,” whispered Hazel softly.

Home Again

By the time the shopping was done, Hazel had
a new dress, shoes, purse, and accessories. Abby pushed the limits
of good judgment as she sped back toward the farm, but they managed
to arrive safely and in time. “Cutting it a bit close aren’t you
girls?” asked Walton as they fled past him and up the stairs.

“Yes sir, three minutes tops,” called Abby as
she raced up the stairs and disappeared into the bedroom, Hazel
right on her heels.

Hazel was already wearing her new outfit and
only had to adjust her hair a bit. She gave it a few strokes with a
brush and turned to see Abby already dressed. “How did you manage
to change that fast?”

“Magic,” laughed Abby as she ran a brush
through her golden hair then pinned on the pill box hat. “How do I
look?”

“Perfect, let’s go my movie star bride.”

“Oh I love the way you say that,” purred
Abby.

“Not now Abby, not now,” admonished Hazel as
she hurried a giggling Abby from the room and down the stairs, “no
time girl, no time.”

The playfulness vanished when they reached
the church. Up until this point Hazel had refrained from visiting
the coffin, preferring to celebrate her grandmother’s life in
stories and memories. Now she could no longer avoid it and the
tears burst forth as she said her last goodbye to her beloved
grandmother. Abby seemed to magically produce tissue from thin air
whenever it was needed and Hazel needed one often. She cried softly
through the entire service except for when she was called upon for
the eulogy. The emotion plain in her voice, Hazel nonetheless
managed to speak clearly and fondly as she talked of her
grandmother and of the things she had learned at the old woman’s
knee. Later, as they stood waiting at the grave site, Hazel
whispered in Abby’s ear.

“Abby, that thing you do to honor Bride
Murphy, I think I will do the same for her. I will practice
carefully all the skills she taught me and I will think of her as I
do.”

“I believe she would be proud,” Abby replied
gently. “I know I am.” She gave Hazel’s arm another gentle squeeze
and they fell silent once again.

Back at the house Abby slipped back into her
waitress role as she did her best to meet the needs of the more
elderly women. Smiling sweetly at her, Hazel joined in. They made
small talk with everyone and Hazel smiled more than once as Abby
plugged her book and told everyone that she was becoming a world
renowned photographer.

Walton smiled gently as he watched the two of
them. Abby was very skilled at making small talk without letting
anyone learn anything about her. Everyone left that evening with
the impression that Hazel was a well known photographer of wildlife
and that Abby was her agent.

Next morning they toured the farm then said
their goodbyes and headed back to the airport. By late afternoon
they were back in St. John’s, sitting in Hazel’s living room. “So
what do we do now?” asked Hazel softly as she passed Abby a cup of
tea then sat beside her.

“Want to come home with me?”

“Oh god Abby, I’d love nothing better, you
know that,” sighed Hazel.

“I know sweetheart,” smiled Abby as she
patted Hazel’s hand. “You have obligations here in the city and I
have to get home to Hubby and that damned proposal. Come visit next
days off?”

“Absolutely,” replied Hazel as she gazed into
Abby’s eyes.

“Say it like you mean it.”

Hazel pulled her close and kissed her
passionately, holding the kiss until Abby had melted completely
into her arms. “Absolutely,” she breathed softly as their lips
slowly parted.

“Hazel honey,” sighed Abby, snuggling deeper
into Hazel’s arms, “want to set a date?”

“November eighteenth.”

“Was that her birthday?”

“Yes it was.”

“November eighteenth it is. I’ll get this
darned proposal out of the way and get to work organizing the
wedding.”

“Can’t I help?” asked Hazel
mischievously.

“Absolutely.”

“Say it like you mean it.”

Abby raised her lips to Hazel’s and kissed
her deeply. “Absolutely,” she breathed.

“Abby, I don’t want to let you go,” sighed
Hazel as she hugged Abby tightly, rocking back and forth.