Read William Shakespeare's The Empire Striketh Back Online
Authors: Ian Doescher
—Fine good morning, lads,
’Twas nice of you to fin’lly come around.
Hear, Echo Base: I say, they have been found!
[Exeunt.
The rebel base on Hoth.
Enter
L
UKE
S
KYWALKER
,
reclining on bed.
Through hazy dreams I have vague memories
Of being taken to the rebel base
And given the droid medic’s greatest care.
Now here I am, and naught but scars remain,
Thus is the creature’s foul at last made fair.
Enter
C-3PO, R2-D2,
and
P
RINCESS
L
EIA
.
Good Master Luke, my wires are fill’d with joy
To see thee fully functional again.
[
aside:
] O that I too could speak aloud!
[
To Luke:
] Meep, squeak!
R2 expresseth his relief as well!
Enter
H
AN
S
OLO
and
C
HEWBACCA
.
How goes it with thee, chuck? O verily,
Thou dost look well to me. In faith, thou seem’st
E’en strong enough, I’ll warr’nt, to pull the ears
From off a gundark.
—Truly, thanks to thee.
Now thou dost owe me two good turns, my friend.
[
To Leia:
] Indeed, Your Worship, well have you conspir’d
To keep me in thy presence longer.
—Fie!
’Twas not my doing. Gen’ral Rieekan doth
Believe that it is still too dangerous
For any ship to leave the system, aye—
E’en thy belov’d
Millenn’um Falcon
—till
The shield of energy is active.
—Ha!
A cloth of fiction thou dost weave, yet I
Have found the fatal error in thy stitch:
For I believe thou wouldst not let a man
So beautiful as I depart from thee.
The only stitch I know is in my side,
From laughing at thy pride most heartily.
Thou mayst attempt to needle at my heart,
But I am sewn of stronger thread than this.
To say I would not let thee go—pish, pish!
I know not whence thy great delusions come,
Thou laser brain.
[
laughing:
] —Gihut, gihut, gihut!
Aye, laugh indeed, thou fuzzball large. But thou
Hast not seen us alone i’ th’passage south,
Where she did unto me unspool, in full,
Her feelings true of fondest love for me.
My feelings? O! Thou arrogant half-wit,
Thou oversizèd child, thou friend of slime,
Thou man of scruffy looks, thou who herd’st nerfs,
Thou fool-born wimpled roughhewn waste of flesh!
What scruffy? Scruffy, how? Whose scruffiness?
How am I all bescruff’d? [
To Luke:
] Belike my words
Were accurate and hit upon the mark,
Since now she hath her temper lost. True, Luke?
Thus is it plain that till thou tam’st thy tongue,
No tongue of woman shalt thou comprehend.
[Leia kisses Luke at length, then exits.
Egh, auugh, gihut!
[
from speaker:
]
—All personnel report
Unto the center of command at once.
[
aside:
] Well hath she play’d the trump.
[
To Luke:
] Be thou at ease.
[Exeunt Han Solo, Chewbacca, C-3PO,
and R2-D2.
O kiss most rare, O lips from heaven sent!
This is a moment I’ll not soon forget.
Though I can sense her heart doth turn to Han,
Still doth this kiss play tricks upon my soul.
By this fair princess I have been bewitch’d—
’Twas ever so since I saw her distress
In R2’s beam, a’pleading for our help.
But though the lass doth move my heart to joy
I ne’er would tempt her with a word too large,
For shall a Jedi’s path lead t’ward romance?
But this sweet kiss I’ll hold in mem’ry’s vault
As a reminder of my noble cause:
To serve rebellion and my princess kind.
[Exit Luke.
Enter
H
AN
S
OLO
, C
HEWBACCA
,
C-3PO
,
and
R2-D2,
crossing to
G
ENERAL
R
IEEKAN
,
the
C
ONTROLLER
,
and
P
RINCESS
L
EIA
.
A visitor hath come, my princess. ’Tis
Outside the base, in sector twelve, and doth
Appear to be directed eastward.
—’Tis
A thing of metal, cold and harsh and sleek—
It is not animal.
—Well, then ’tis not
The self-same creature that did harm our Luke.
But what do ye men think that it may be?
Belike a speeder, one of ours?
—Nay, wait.
A signal dim doth reach unto mine ears.
[A faint signal is heard.
[
through comlink:
] Beh mena bem bem. Mena bem bem beh.
Good Sir, six million forms of language do
I know, and I may tell thee true that this
Strange signal is not by th’Alliance us’d.
It may, perhaps, be an Imperi’l code.
’Tis not a friendly sound, that much is sure.
Now Chewie, come with me and we’ll to it.
[
Aside:
] Snow creatures first, and now Imperi’l droids,
What portents of great evil may these be?
Though I am brave, forsooth these signs do make
E’en my courageous heart begin to fear.
I find myself afraid of what may come,
That my whole soul shall freeze ere this is done.
[
To all:
] Chewbacca and myself have ventur’d out
To see the probe. Now Chewie gives a shout—
It fires on him, and I respond in turn.
Be gone, thou enemy of all that’s right.
But wait, now what hath happen’d? I releas’d
A blast most simple—aye, a single blast.
Yet it appears that single blast was all
It could withstand; the blast was lethal, friends.
Now naught is left, for it hath been destroy’d.
What was’t?
—A droid. My blast did not strike hard,
Belike the thing did self-destruct.
—’Tis clear!
A probe droid from the Empire. This doth mean
The start of our rebellion’s flight from Hoth,
For now that we discoverèd have been
We lack security.
—Agreed. Methinks
The Empire knoweth we are here on Hoth.
[
Aside:
] My sense of doom and dread is not without
Its cause, for this event is grave indeed.
Good friends, dear rebels, comrades one and all,
We have no choice but to flee hastily.
Our swift evacuation shall commence,
And till ’tis done, make ready our defense.
[Exeunt.
Aboard the Empire’s Super Star Destroyer.
Enter
A
DMIRAL
O
ZZEL
, G
ENERAL
V
EERS
,
and
C
APTAIN
P
IETT
.
My admiral?
—Yes, Captain.
—Here’s a thing
That thou shouldst see, good Sir. We have receiv’d
Report from a Hoth system probe, the best
That we have found so far.
—Your best, belike,
Shall bested be, for thousands of these probes
We have a’wandering the galaxy
And looking for the rebels. I want proof,
Piett, not leads. Proof—only that—is best.
But Sir, this best is better yet, for it
Hath found some forms of life upon the ground.
How better yet? How best? It could be but
An error or some useless reading. If
We were to follow ev’ry lead, our best
Would soon turn worst.
—And yet I do maintain
My best is better yet for this: ’tis said
That Hoth is all devoid of human forms.
It seems, good Sir, the rebels have been found.
Why else would sign of life appear on Hoth?
I’ll warrant, Sir, my forecast shall prevail.
Enter
D
ARTH
V
ADER
.
You have found something good?
—My Lord, we have.
A probe that late hath made descent on Hoth
Hath made discovery of both life forms
And the appearance of a power source.
[Piett shows Vader the screen.
Thy judgment hath prov’d best, Piett: ’tis them.
Forsooth, the rebels may be found therein.
My Lord, there are throughout the galaxy
So many settlements we have not mapp’d.
This could be smugglers, maybe even—
—Nay,
That is the system, certain am I of’t,
And Skywalker is with them there. Now set
Thy course t’ward Hoth, and Gen’ral Veers, prepare
Your men for combat.
[Exeunt Admiral Ozzel, General Veers, and Captain Piett.
—Hath not a Sith eyes?
Hath not a Sith such feelings, heart, and soul,
As any Jedi Knight did e’er possess?
If you prick us, do we not bleed? If you
Blast us, shall we not injur’d be? If you
Assault with lightsaber, do we not die?
I have a body as do other men,
Though made, in part, of wires and steel. And aye,
I vari’us passions feel, as all men do.
So I, a Sith, shall not distracted be
Till I attain the thing for which I seek.
Therefore I shall pursue this Skywalker
Unto the limit of the galaxy.
For true, he hath the Death Star quite destroy’d,
And true, he hath the Force with him as well.
But truly, more than that the boy doth have—
For truth be told, his name doth stir my soul.
The boy’s connection to myself I do
Not understand as yet. This Skywalker
Must have some link to my life past, but what?
So shall this Sith pursue this rebel lad,
And find the missing truth of Vader’s life.
Enter
G
ENERAL
V
EERS
.
What news dost thou have, Gen’ral Veers?
—My Lord,
Our noble fleet hath flown to Hoth in haste
With hopes to catch the rebels by surprise.
The fleet has movèd out of lightspeed now,
But com-scan hath detected a sharp shield
Of energy surrounding planet six
Within the system. It is strong enough
To hinder what bombardment we can make.
This grim news I report with sadden’d mien:
It seems, my Lord, our fleet is all too close.
The rebels are aware of our attack,
For Adm’ral Ozzel left lightspeed too near
To the Hoth system.
—He believ’d surprise
Was wiser…
—Say no more. Speak not to his
Defense. He is as clumsy as he is
Replete with ignorance. Prepare your troops
Now, Veers, to lead a ground attack. We shall
Still win the day, despite the blunder.
—Aye.
[Exit General Veers.
V
ADER
hails
A
DMIRAL
O
ZZEL
and
C
APTAIN
P
IETT
,
who enter by balcony.
Lord Vader, I am happy to report
The fleet has come out of lightspeed and is
Prepar’d to—
[Darth Vader begins to choke Admiral Ozzel using the Force.
—Thou hast fail’d me once again,
But nevermore shalt thou have chance to fail.
I bring the Force to bear upon thy throat
That thou, in thy last breath, shalt know my pow’r.
Captain Piett?
—My Lord?
—Prepare to land
Our troops beyond the shield of energy,
And then deploy our fleet so naught can ’scape
The system. Do it, Admiral Piett.
And be thou sure to rise to thy new rank.
[Admiral Ozzel dies. Exit Darth Vader.
Alas, with this promotion comes some dread,
For Vader hath no rev’rence for the head.
[Exit.