Winds of Change (6 page)

‘It was Father's money, to dispose of as he wished. Let's not talk about it any more. I haven't got my head around it all yet. If I get a steady income from the trust, maybe things won't be too bad. How's Nikki going on at school? She's going to university next year, isn't she? What's she going to study?'

Regina hadn't said a word to her brother, but found herself confiding in Minnie.

‘So I told her to get an abortion. It'll ruin her whole life if she has a baby now; stop her getting qualifications. She can always have children later.'

‘I read somewhere that having an abortion can make it harder to get pregnant again. What does
she
want to do about it?'

‘She doesn't know what she wants.'

‘Who's the father?'

‘A guy she's been going out with for a year: Tim. He's the same age as she is. Nice lad – well, I thought he was nice, now I'm not so sure. I saw him in town and told him what I thought of him for deserting her, only it turned out he didn't know about the baby and
she
had dumped him.'

‘She'll be in shock still, not sure what to do. It takes time to get used to the idea that you're having a baby everyone will disapprove of.'

Regina stared at her in dismay. ‘I'm sorry. I'd completely forgotten.'

‘What?'

‘That you'd had a baby.'

‘
I
hadn't forgotten. I wonder every day what my daughter's doing and if she's happy.'

Regina could have kicked herself for bringing that desperately sad look to her sister's face. ‘Couldn't you try to trace her?'

‘Maybe one day, when I've sorted out my life.' Minnie looked at her uncertainly. ‘Don't push Nikki into doing something she doesn't want to. I've always regretted my baby being adopted.'

‘Why did you agree to it, then?'

‘I don't remember agreeing. They kept me heavily sedated after the birth. Father could have afforded to help me a bit, just till I got my degree, but he wouldn't. And then he . . . sent me into that place.'

‘Because you needed professional help.'

‘Did I? Or was it a convenient way to get rid of me while he dealt with the baby?'

Regina stared at her in horror. ‘You can't mean that!'

‘Can't I? I wasn't mad, though you'd think I was from the way I was treated. Post-natal depression, they call it today, and treat it as a temporary illness. I'd not have brought this up, only . . .' She laid one hand on her sister's arm. ‘Don't force Nikki to get rid of her baby if she doesn't want to. She'll regret it every minute of her life if you do.'

There was silence for a few moments, then Regina said, ‘Well, I still think she should have an abortion. It's very quick and easy now, and she's only six weeks along. But I can't actually force her, can I?'

‘I hope not.'

‘And I wouldn't do anything to hurt her.'

Miranda smiled. ‘I can see that.'

When her sister went to her bedroom to tidy her hair, Regina began to clear up the kitchen. But she kept stopping to wipe her eyes. She hadn't realized exactly what her father had done – and she couldn't have stopped him if she had known.

Surely her sister was mistaken? Surely it had been necessary to have her committed to a mental hospital?

Lou spent the morning thinking hard. He'd really enjoyed the evening spent with Miranda and now he was wondering if he'd done right by her in suggesting she live with him. She'd just spent years nursing her father, after all.

He grimaced. She wouldn't have years looking after him, only a few months, the cancer specialist said. The heart specialist said you could never tell, and he could live for years without doing anything about his condition, so the cancer would probably kill him first. But what would Minnie get for looking after him? Temporary asylum from her family then out on the streets again? Not good enough. He had to make it truly worth her while.

He was disgusted at how she'd been treated by her family. Like a child, that's what, and a stupid child at that. She wasn't stupid at all, rather the contrary. From her conversation last night, she'd read widely, was up to date on current affairs and even though she'd been trapped with her manipulative father, she'd used her computer to explore the world. No, she wasn't stupid, but she was amazingly timid where her family was concerned. The word ‘cowed' kept creeping into his mind. What the hell had they done to her when she was younger?

He went across to get himself a glass of orange juice – half a glass. If he poured out too much he would spill it as he moved jerkily across the room. His niece had bought him a plastic cup with a lid, a child's cup, dammit. He'd thrown it straight in the rubbish bin. Nothing tasted nice out of plastic and he wasn't going to be treated like a baby, not now nor at any stage in his final months.

Thuds from above his head had him wincing. He was sick of noise echoing into his home, wanted some peace and quiet – and a better outlook than this. He could afford it. Why had he delayed making the changes?

He was selfish enough to hope Miranda would come and help him through his last few months. If he'd met her earlier in his life, he'd have been attracted to her, might even have ended up marrying her. Now, he had to guard against her getting too attached to him, for her own sake. It didn't matter how he felt. He could do nothing about it now except protect her.

He put the empty glass down as that thought sank in. He'd talked about Miranda helping him slay his current dragon, which was his niece with her plans to have him safely locked away for these final months, instead of allowing him to fly free while he still could.

But he wasn't the only one with dragons. Miranda had at least one, that damned brother of hers. Perhaps her half-sister too. No. Though they didn't seem close, she didn't speak nervously of Regina. If Miranda came to help him out, he might be able to help her slay her own dragon. She certainly needed help.

Tears came into his eyes as he suddenly realized that he could still be useful, even in his present condition. It'd be very satisfying to help a decent person like Miranda Fox rebuild her confidence and make a better life for herself.

He dashed away the tears, glad no one was there to see this weakness. It felt so good to be
useful
still. It'd been horrible for a man who'd always led a very active life to come out of hospital and feel he was just sitting around like a piece of rubbish, waiting to be disposed of.

Smiling, he went to switch on his computer and start a new folder, calling it ‘Miranda's Dragons'. With many pauses for thought he began to make a list, this one for his eyes only.

The afternoon had nearly gone before he knew where he was. Air conditioning whispered quietly around him, keeping another hot day at bay, and the other tenants were mercifully quiet.

The doorbell roused him from his labours and he glanced at his watch. Damn! It'd be his niece. Hilary came round twice a week to bring him a supply of healthy meals, most of which he threw away after she'd gone.

He signed off. He not only had it password protected, he stored some files permanently on another site. She wasn't getting a chance to see what was on his computer, whatever happened. He rolled his wheelchair slowly along the corridor to the living room, making a mental note that somehow he must find a way to stop Hilary chasing Miranda away.

She had let herself in and dumped some shopping bags in the kitchen by the time he joined her.

‘There you are, Uncle Louis. You look tired. You spend far too much time on that computer of yours, you know. Come and have a rest while I make your tea.'

He did as he was told because it was easier, and, anyway, he was a bit tired.

‘Have you thought any more about the care home I found, Uncle?'

‘Of course not. I threw the brochures away. I've already told you I'm not ready for that sort of place.'

‘You need to get everything sorted out before it's too late. You don't have to go into it immediately, though you might enjoy having company and activities. You spend far too much time on your own.'

He let her talk on because he knew he didn't have to do as she wanted. He'd better change the power of attorney he'd given her, though, to make sure she couldn't override his wishes towards the end. He'd do that tomorrow. He pulled out his little notebook and jotted it down.
See Sally Patel re power of attorney.
He had one of the smartest lawyers in town, and Sally was a friend as well.

Miranda was relieved when Regina decided to go round to visit Sebastian that afternoon. She need to think about Lou's offer.

Having waved goodbye to her half-sister, Miranda went to sit on the back veranda, staring out across the huge garden. The near part was immaculately cared for but too neat for her liking. She didn't like to see plants regimented like this and suspected they never did their best under such conditions. But her father had considered that to be the purpose of human intervention in the plant world: to tame nature and force order on it. Her own patch of garden was further towards the back, out of sight. There, plants flowered riotously and tomatoes grew so well in the warm summer sunshine she had to give some of them away to the neighbours.

She couldn't focus on her own problems, however, because she couldn't stop thinking of Nikki. Poor girl! She was even younger than Miranda had been when she'd made the same mistake. And though people said they understood, they didn't. It was terrifying as well as exciting to think that you'd created a new life, to know that your body now housed two people.

She hoped Regina would bear in mind what she'd said, wished she could have a chat with Nikki, offer her support.

Why not? She did a quick calculation. They were seven hours ahead of England, so it was morning there and she might catch Nikki in. Going inside she picked up the phone and dialled her sister's number.

It was answered almost immediately. ‘Hello?'

‘Nikki? It's Miranda, your aunt.'

‘Hi, Auntie Min. Is Mum with you?'

‘No. I wanted to speak to you on my own. I'm interfering, I know, but she told me about the baby.'

‘Oh. Well, if you've rung to persuade me to get rid of it, I've not decided yet and it's up to me, don't you think?'

‘I certainly do.'

‘You do?'

‘Yes. Did you know that I had a child when I was only a couple of years older than you?'

‘
You
did?'

She sounded so incredulous, Miranda felt hurt. Did they think her too unattractive to attract a man? ‘Yes, I did. They made me have it adopted and then acted as if she'd never existed.' She couldn't stop her voice wobbling.

‘Oh, Auntie Min, I'm so sorry.'

‘I am too. It was the wrong thing to do, for me anyway, but I always consoled myself with the thought that the baby would have a better life, because I knew my father would never accept her. He'd have made the child feel unwanted and unloved and no one should feel that. Anyway, what I rang for was to say, don't let them push you into anything you're not sure about. It's your decision, no one else's. And if you're short of money, I've got some tucked away and I'd be happy to help you.'

There was the sound of someone weeping. She waited a minute then said gently, ‘Oh, Nikki. Have I upset you?'

‘Only in a n–nice way. Auntie Min, I felt to be alone in the world and suddenly you're there, on my side. You've no idea how much better that makes me feel.'

‘I'm glad. I'm not very good at standing up to them, I'm afraid, so I think we'd better keep quiet about talking to one another. But if I can help, if you need something, well, I'm here.'

There was the sound of Nikki blowing her nose. ‘I'll remember that.'

‘What about the father?'

‘He wants to keep it. But he's the same age as I am and we have no money, and we were both going to university. Is it fair to burden him with a child?'

‘A child isn't a burden, it's a blessing.'

‘To hear my mother talk, I've been nothing but a burden all my life.'

Miranda sighed. ‘It's just her way. Regina does love you, I'm quite certain of that.'

‘In her own way and on her own terms.'

‘We can't help being ourselves.' Miranda waited a moment or two to see if there were any more confidences, then said gently, ‘I'd better go now, Nikki dear. Your mother might come back at any minute. Shocking to be nervous of her at my age, isn't it? But she can be very intimidating when she gets angry!' Not in Sebastian's league, but then, Miranda had never seen anyone get into such rages as he did.

‘Tell me about it.'

‘I'll try to ring again, Nikki. Or you could email me.'

‘Thanks. And look . . . I really do appreciate your support.'

She put the phone down, feeling it had been the right thing to do, at least it felt right to her. She remembered so clearly how alone she'd felt in the same situation.

The phone rang. Sebastian. Her heart jittered in her chest.

‘Minnie! We're taking you to see the flat tonight. Be ready at seven.'

He rang off without waiting for a response.

She picked up the phone and rang Lou. ‘Can I come round again tonight? I've had orders from my brother to go and see the flat with him. He put the phone down before I could say I was busy.'

He chuckled. ‘Rebelling, eh? That's good. Yes, do come round. My niece has left me a healthy meal. We'll inspect it and if we don't fancy it, we'll get some Chinese food sent in.'

Miranda hummed as she got ready to leave. She particularly enjoyed writing a note to her brother. It was so much easier to face him in writing than to confront him in person.

Sorry I can't be here, Sebastian. I already had an engagement. You should have waited to find out if I was free before you put down the phone.