Wishes on the Wind (33 page)

    Meg turned, shaking her head. "I… I think I should help Johnny now. We're running short of dishes. Margaret can take the tray outside."

    Her busy fingers stopping still, Cook assessed Meg's colorless face. "You're feeling poorly, is that it? Tell me the truth, for it won't do to send you outside if you are."

    "No… no, I'm fine." Not wishing to cause any further speculation, Meg attempted a smile, grateful as Margaret stepped into the breach with a knowing glance.

    "Give me the tray." And then to Cook, "The girl's right. Johnny ain't working fast enough to keep up, and I'd rather be outside than in this hot kitchen, anyway."

    "All right."

    Turning back to the sink, Meg met Johnny's assessing gaze as she reached for the nearby cloth. Johnny had been cautious about    the terms of his friendship with her during the past year, and she could not blame him. But the warmth in his eyes had not waned and she knew if he had his choice it would have been otherwise between them.

    However, Meg's thoughts did not linger with Johnny Law. David's anguish, obvious when she had looked up and caught his gaze, cut her too deeply to allow it to escape her mind for long.

    It had been a terrible three weeks since that day on the hill. She missed David terribly their talks, their arguments, the knowledge that they valued each other in a way they valued no other. As brief as was the time she had spent in David's embrace, she was unable to forget the startling feelings he stirred inside her, the desire to feel his arms around her, and to feel his mouth play against hers in that loving way.

    Love? Was that the name for this misery inside her that would not be assuaged? She had done the right thing the only thing she could do, hadn't she?

    The misery she saw in David's eyes would fade. David would forget her when a suitable young woman caught his fancy and he decided that the girl from the valley whom he had thought he loved was not meant for him at all. And she would be relieved of this ache inside her then wouldn’t she?

    That last thought suddenly too difficult for her tortured mind to accept, Meg felt her throat choke tightly and her eyes warm to tears.

    "Meg…"

    Looking up, Meg met the sympathy in Johnny Law's brown eyes. She turned her head, only to feel his arm slide companionably along her shoulder as he continued in a whisper. "He's not worth it, Meg. Buck up. He'll be off to school soon, and things'll smooth out for you then."

    That thought giving her little consolation, Meg nodded and attempted a smile, realizing belatedly that she had inadvertently encouraged Johnny as his arm tightened around her and he continued. "When he's gone and you've a chance to set things straight, we can"

    "Get away from her, Law!"

    David's unexpected command brought a sudden stillness to the busy kitchen as he advanced threateningly into the room. The color drained from Johnny's face as David walked closer, his expression livid, his hands balled into tight fists. A glance around     her revealed David had the attention of the entire staff as he snarled, "You heard what I said."

    Johnny's arm dropped back to his side, and Meg responded, "Johnny was just trying to"

    "I know what he was trying!"

    David held her gaze with a look that tore at her heart. Unable to bear more, Meg turned away. She did not look back until the sound of David's retreating step indicated he had left as unexpectedly as he had appeared, leaving a silent kitchen behind him.

    "All right, back to work all of you."

    Cook's sharp command broke the tense silence the moment before Miss Letty walked into the kitchen, her expression strained. "I saw David. Is everything all right in here?"

    Cook looked briefly at Meg before responding, "Yes, ma'am, everything's all right."

    Hesitating only a moment, the mistress walked out of the kitchen as quickly as she had entered.

    Silent as she turned back to the dishes, Meg swallowed against the memory of David's anguished expression. The only thing that emerged through her distress was the premonition that she had not seen the last of this affair.

    Shaking off Abigail Hutton's hand with a gruff word as he made his way past guests gathered in conversational groups, David turned toward the front doorway. Caring little for the curious glances his stiff step evoked, he strode outside into the darkness of the yard. His fury had been such at the sight of Law's arm around Meg's shoulders that he knew he need remove himself from the house immediately, before he made a scene he would regret.

    Halting in the shadow of a nearby tree, David took a deep, steadying breath. Damn that little bastard, John Law! Wretch that he was, the fellow obviously thought the time was ripe to take advantage of the present state of affairs between Meg and himself.

    The memory of John Law's arm around Meg's shoulder, his head lowered as he whispered into her ear, returned with sudden clarity and fury rose anew. Law would never touch Meg again! Meg was his.

    That determination suddenly clear within his mind, David turned and walked back toward the house. He needed to wait until the affair progressing within was over and the last guest departed within a day or so. It wouldn't be long.

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    "Meg, dear, have you forgotten how to smile?"

    Father Matthew's unexpected question raised Meg's head from the figures on the paper in front of her. Her attempt at a responsive smile further dropped his spirits as he sat across from her at the table in the rectory kitchen.

    "I'm sorry, Father. I've been pensive of late and haven't thought about the effect on others." And then with another valiant attempt, "But I've not forgotten how to smile truly."

    But Meg's efforts were pathetically inadequate, and conflicting emotions churned inside Father Matthew. Dear Meg. She was becoming a beautiful young woman, and her new maturity rang a warning bell in his mind even as he reached to cover her work-roughened hand with his.

    "You've something troubling you, that's plain to see. Oh, you've done a good job of disguising the way you feel, but the truth is, your smile's not true, and your eyes aren't happy. And you've been avoiding the confessional, too. So I ask you now to tell me if you're disturbed in a way that I might be of help. Your Ma would have wanted that, you know."

    Withdrawing her hand from his, Meg lowered her gaze, looking back up at him unexpectedly with an intensity that disturbed him as much as her fervent question.

    "How do you know if you've done the right thing, Father, when you're causing someone pain no matter what you do?"

    Father Matthew paused, feeling the need for caution in his response. "Pain is sometimes a necessary part of maturing, but you must make yourself more clear if I'm to help you."

    "I… it's David Lang, Father." Her lovely face flushing, Meg continued haltingly. "I've put an end to our friendship because he'd have me choose between Sean and him."

    Managing to restrain a violent lurch of feelings, Father Matthew responded evenly. "The fellow must understand that ties of blood come before all."

    "I've tried to tell him that, Father, but he says Sean is heading for difficulties, and that he'll draw me into them with him."

    "I'll not let that happen, Meg."

    Meg avoided his eyes again. "David wanted me to leave the valley."

    "What?"

    "He said he'd get me a position in Philadelphia if he goes to school there."

    "Impossible!" Incensed, Father Matthew stood up and turned    away in an attempt to conceal the heat of his reaction. Beautiful, innocent Meg. She didn't even realize what the fellow was asking of her!

    ''Aye, I told him the same. And I told him that was the end of it our friendship because I promised Sean I wouldn't let him pressure me into leaving the valley."

    Cursing himself for placing Meg in the position where she'd be exposed to David Lang's lecherous intentions, Father Matthew nodded stiffly. "Your brother is a wise young man far wiser than I gave him credit for, and you were right to keep your word to him."

    "But David's unhappy, Father. He's angry and he's suffering."

    "If the devil was to tempt you and you refused him, would you concern yourself if he rightfully suffered disappointment?"

    "David's not the devil, Father!"

    "Is he not?" Suddenly realizing he was trembling with rage, Father Matthew took a deep breath and paused a moment more before returning to the table where Meg now stood, her expression concerned.

    "Ah, Meg, my dear, don't you see? You're a beautiful woman now, and David Lang's not missed that beauty. He doesn't want you being drawn into Sean's difficulties, he says. He doesn't want to leave you, he says. He wants to take you with him to Philadelphia, he says. But does the fellow say he cares a whit for your reputation, for the name you would carry for the rest of your days if you were to follow him?"

    "He didn't mean it
that
way, Father!" Her smooth cheeks reddening, Meg shook her head vehemently. "David loves me. He wouldn't hurt me."

    "He said that, did he?"

    Meg nodded slowly, and Father Matthew's rage exploded. "The Son of Satan that he is, after all!"

    "Father!"

    "Profanity is a sin to which I occasionally fall, Meg, but I don't regret it, for there's no better name for the fellow than that!"

    "You're wrong, Father. David cares about me. We've been so close almost like one person sometimes."

    Father Matthew paused, his agitation intense. "Did he kiss you, Meg?" His unexpected question surprised her, and Meg took a step backwards, but Father Matthew would not relent. "I asked you a question, Meg."

    His heart twisting in his chest, Father Matthew saw the courage it took for Meg to raise her chin and respond.

    "Aye, he did."

    "And did he take you in his arms did he try to"

    "No, Father! He let me go when I told him that he had put an end to it between us."

    But there were tears in Meg's eyes where there hadn't been before, and Father Matthew suffered her pain as well as his own. His reaction instinctive, he took Meg into his arms and held her comfortingly close against him.

    "Ah, Meg… Meg… You don't want to believe poorly of David Lang, I can see. He's convinced you that he's good and wants only the best for you, but you're too innocent to realize what the fellow has in mind."

    "No, Father, David didn't"

    "Shhh, Meg." Father Matthew knew he could not allow Meg to believe David Lang to be better than he was. He continued cautiously. "I'll not argue the matter with you, for you've not the experience to see the fellow's intentions. Instead, I ask you to believe me when I say that I know the weaknesses of men's natures far more intimately than you do, and that I'm in a better position to judge David Lang's actions than you are. So certain am I of the matter, Meg, that if I wasn't sure it'd cause even greater difficulty, I'd tell you to leave your position on the hill immediately."

    "I can't do that, Father! Uncle Timothy would have a fit, and Sean would think"

    "I know what he'd think. And I'd not blame him for the violence of his reaction."

    "Father, please believe me"

    "I believe you, Meg." The glorious blue innocence of Meg's gaze was a personal torment that tore at his heart, and Father Matthew continued softly. "I believe you think you told me the truth, but it's also my belief that you've been misled. And since it's I who placed you in the Lang household, I hold myself responsible."

    "You needn't worry, Father. David and I no longer even speak. And he's soon to leave for school, to be gone for… years."

    "The sooner the better, Meg."

    Meg's gaze dropped from his. "Aye, Father."

    "You did the right thing, Meg. You've nothing to regret, and if David Lang is suffering, it's well deserved."

    "Aye, Father."

    "Look at me, Meg."

    Father Matthew steeled himself against the assault of Meg's gaze as it slowly rose to meet his. "I know what's best for you, and you must trust me to advise you. It's what your Ma wanted."

    "Aye, Father."

    "Gather up your things and go now, Meg. We'll not accomplish any more today. You may finish your lessons at home and I'll go over them with you the next time we meet. But remember what I said, for your future depends on it. You've nothing to regret, and you mustn't allow David Lang to make you feel you have. Do you understand, Meg?"

    Meg hesitated again, torturing him with the trust in her clear eyes. He held his breath as she finally whispered in response, "I'll try."

    "I can ask no more."

    Still as a statue, Father Matthew watched as the rectory door closed behind Meg.

    His conversation with Uncle Martin concluded, David walked to the study door with an even, purposeful stride that belied his inner agitation. He stepped into the hall and closed the door behind him. He had not looked back as his uncle's anger was not pleasant to behold after their lengthy and vehement exchange.