Witch Queen (15 page)

In spite of the warmth of my cloak, a nasty
shiver went down my spine. I felt my own people from the Pit had
discarded me. We had all grown up together, and I had believed we
were like an extended family.

But I wasn’t like them. I was a witch now,
and I had to start thinking like one.

I didn’t even know anything about Fawkes,
not really. Apart from his rapid temper and his magic fire, I
didn’t know him any more than I knew the men from the Pit. They
were all strangers to me. I had to put all my faith and trust in
the Goddess and Ada, and I had to hope that Fawkes wasn’t leading
us into a trap.

The familiar rocking motion of Torak was the
only thing that brought me any comfort.

Could I really do this? Was I really strong
enough? Was I even a real steel maiden? What if Ada and the others
were wrong? What if I was more human than witch, and I couldn’t
fulfill whatever they expected of me, and this quest was all for
nothing?

I’d never be ready to enter Witchdom, or to
confront the necromancer priests, or to live in a world without
Jon.

We moved through tall ferns and other
lime-green foliage I’d never seen before. The thicket had deepened
as the land sloped downhill, and I didn’t know where we were
anymore. I only knew that we were far from any of the main
roads.

I fixed my eyes on Fawkes’ long, luscious
green hair. While it was such an unusual color, here, in the
woodlands, it was the most natural thing. It blended in beautifully
with the pine needles and tall ferns, like they were part of each
other. I watched him curiously as we rode. He never once turned
around to see if we were still following him. Perhaps he didn’t
care.

After we’d been riding for hours, the trees
thinned, and we came to a meadow with tall golden grasses and a
sparkling stream. The sun was a flaming orange disk sinking below
the mountains to the west. It would be dark soon.

Leo came up on my right side, his red hair
blazing in the last rays of the sun. I felt his eyes on me, but I
didn’t look at him. I knew he wanted to speak to me, but I wasn’t
in the mood to speak to him. I hadn’t forgiven him for what he’d
said. Not yet.

Fawkes dismounted and led his bull elk to
the stream. I slowed Torak to a stop and slipped off his back. I
made a clumsy hop to the ground on wobbly legs and stumbled around
until I regained my footing. I was glad to be on solid ground for a
while.

I led Torak to the stream. The men
dismounted around me, and I ignored them. But I smiled as the big
horse walked right into the water and soaked himself. He drank, and
with a whip of his tail, he sent a shower of water on my face.

“Thanks,” I laughed playfully. The smile on
my face felt strange, tight, and out of place, as though I had
never smiled before.

I knelt next to the stream. I reeked of
sweat and grime and blood. But there was no privacy here for a real
bath, and I sighed and soaked my hands in the stream. The water was
ice-cold and stung my skin like tiny needles, but I resisted the
urge to pull them out. I was determined to rid myself of the sticky
remnants the dead had left on me, and I scrubbed water on my face,
neck, and collarbone. I reached under my armpits and scrubbed my
arms. It wasn’t so bad, and although I shivered and my skin was
icy, at least it was cleaner.

I didn’t care that the men were probably
staring at me. The water had washed away some of the grime, and
strangely enough, some of the pain I’d been carrying.

Fawkes was watching me. He sat crossed
legged in front of a small roaring fire. He lifted an eyebrow at
me, and I realized it was an invitation to sit with him and get
warm. The others had made camp some distance away, and their horses
grazed next to the stream. Nugar was attempting to light their fire
unsuccessfully. It would have been simpler to have asked Fawkes for
help, but of course they wouldn’t.

Torak settled with the other horses, and
surprisingly the elk joined them. I made my way over to Fawkes and
settled next to the fire, facing him. I knew how this must have
looked to the others. I had chosen the witch over them, but they
had made their choice and had shut me out.
To hell with
them.
Although I hoped they cared where I sat, I realized they
probably didn’t.

I did my best to look natural, but Fawkes’
green eyes seemed able to read my most intimate thoughts. I
shivered, both from the cold and from the anxiety of being alone
with Fawkes. The warmth of the fire felt good, but it’d take a good
long while before my clothes were dry, and I truly felt warm
again.

“That water was freezing cold,” Fawkes
searched my face, but I didn’t look away. “You’re shivering. You
must be
very
cold. A steel maiden’s magic can heal the
deadliest wounds, you know, and keep you from ever being sick, but
it will not provide you with warmth.”

I was a little annoyed that my own magic
couldn’t help me with the cold. Being a witch wasn’t as exciting as
I had first thought. I reached out and held my hands near the fire.
My fingers were stiff with cold, and I continued to shake despite
the warmth of the flames.

“I know,” I said.

A trickle of water slid down my temple. “But
thanks to your fire I’m getting warmer already.”

He stared at me for a moment.

“The nights are going to get a lot colder
now that we’re traveling more to the east.”

The yellow and orange flames reflected in
his eyes. “You know…I could help you with that.”

“With what?” I said. My teeth chattered, and
I wondered if I’d made a mistake by washing in the icy stream.

“I could help you get warmer…help you become
completely dry if you wish.”

My eyes widened. “You mean with magic?”

My heart skipped a beat. I was both
frightened and excited…but mostly frightened. “You want to use
magic on me?”

Fawkes took my hesitation as a definite
no
.

His face hardened as if I’d insulted him.
“Fine, stay wet and cold and foolish like a human. You’ve been
surrounded by humans for too long, and now you’re becoming like
them. Even you are afraid.”

I scowled at his fast temper.

“I’m not,” I said, glad that my voice didn’t
waver. I lifted my chin and placed my hands on my lap. “Fine. Do
it.”

I clenched my jaw and waited. But I didn’t
have long to wait.

Fawkes smiled, and it made him look younger.
When he raised his hands, yellow and orange flames sprouted from
his fingers and raced along his palms.

And then the fire shot from his hands and
hit me square in the chest.

CHAPTER 12

I
HEARD SHOUTS OF alarm, and for a
horrifying second I thought he was about to burn me alive. I felt
the hot flames lick my face and skin. It rolled over all my limbs
and even covered my scalp. I was frightened.

But then I didn’t burn. I didn’t feel pain.
It was like a hot blanket had been wrapped around me. The touch of
the fire was like silk on my skin. I expected the acrid smell of
burned flesh and hair, but instead Fawkes’ fire was the sweet smell
of wheat, pinecones, daffodils, and lilies. It smelled like rain.
My hair and clothes flapped around me in some invisible breeze. I
laughed out loud at this strange but soothing magic fire. After a
few seconds, the flames winked out.

When the flames had disappeared I felt as
though I’d been soaking in a glorious hot tub for hours. I was
deliciously warm, and my clothes were dry. I smiled and felt much
more confident about Fawkes when I saw that he was smiling, too. I
realized that the scent I’d smelled
was
magic. It wasn’t the
choking, sulfur smell of black magic, but the sweet scent of earth
magic—Fawkes’ magic.

“Elena! By the Creator. Are you all
right?”

Leo and Will’s faces were masked with worry.
The others were on their feet but remained near their fire. I had
been so lost in the caress of the magic fire, that for a moment I’d
forgotten about everyone else.

“Of course she’s fine,” growled Fawkes.
“She’s with me.”

I lifted my hand and waved them off.

“I’m fine. Fawkes was just helping me get
warm again.”

I wanted to say we were doing witch’s stuff,
but I knew it would only make things worse. And I was emotionally
drained. I didn’t wait for Leo’s reply and turned back to face the
fire. I could hear Leo’s tread softly disappear as he returned to
the others. My shoulders slumped.

“You’re hurt by what those humans said,”
said Fawkes gently.

I watched the flames, unable to meet his
eyes. But then I realized it wouldn’t do any good to deny my
feelings to the one person who actually seemed to want to help
me.

I released a breath. “I guess I am. And I
know you’re going to tell me how foolish that is, but I can’t help
how I feel.”

“It’s not surprising that you feel this
way,” said Fawkes. “The high witch, Ada, told me you had been
raised by humans. It’s completely normal to feel attached to them.
But you will need to disassociate from them, and soon. It’s for
your own good. Humans will never accept you, Elena. You’re a magic
bearer, a witch, and they will hate you for it.”

I thought of Rose and Jon and raised my
voice.

“Not all. They don’t all hate me. And not
all witches hate humans either. But I’m sure you already know
that.”

His lips were drawn tightly, but he nodded.
“There are a few exceptions. But don’t let that fool you—humans and
witches don’t mix. They never have.”

I was about to tell him again how wrong his
was when he asked, “Who’s Jon?”

I could hardly find my voice. “He’s…a
friend…a very good friend.”

Fawkes studied me for a moment, and his gaze
narrowed.

“You’re in love with this human.”

My face burned again.

Fawkes continued, “But he’s not here, is he?
Where is he?”

The tears came spilling out of my eyes, but
I wasn’t ashamed for him to see me so vulnerable. My voice was
steady.

“Back in Soul City. He’s been infected. I
won’t lie to you and say that he’s not a large part of the reason
I’m here, risking everything, risking everyone. I do want to stop
the necromancers, but above all I want to save Jon.”

I could never be ashamed of my love for Jon.
Not ever.

“He saved my life,” I said a little more
softly and not without caution. “And I’ll do anything I can to save
him.”

I expected Fawkes to lash out at me with
some nasty narrow-minded comment, and for a moment I thought I was
going to jump over the fire and punch him. But he was quiet, too
quiet, and for long time we sat without speaking, lost in our own
thoughts.

“We don’t need the
humans
you know,”
said Fawkes, breaking the silence between us. “I can protect you
the rest of the way. In fact, it would be best not to bring them to
Witchdom.”

I released an irritated breath. “I’m half
human, too.”

The last of the sun disappeared, and I was
grateful for the light and warmth of Fawkes’ fire. I realized that
I’d still be shivering cold if he hadn’t used his magic on me.

“You can’t be a half-witch. There’s no such
thing.”

Fawkes put another log on the fire. The
white marks on his face glowed in the light of the campfire, but
his eyes were cast in shadow.

“You’re either a witch or a human. You’re
either a steel maiden or just a woman from the Pit. That’s your
choice to make. But you have more witch in your blood. Your blood
magic is strong. I can tell. Your human part is far less
dominant.”

I was bewildered, and though I could see the
sincerity in his face, I wasn’t sure I believed him. However,
knowing that I might have less of Brother Edgar’s blood running
through my veins did encourage me. That bastard had always been
evil. He didn’t need black magic. He already had a blackened soul.
I would rather have had any other human blood than his.

“How could you possibly know that?” I
asked.

“I can sense it,” he said honestly. “You
give off a particular energy. A light, if you will. I can sense
these energies. It’s part of my magic. All witches give off energy,
some more than others. Usually, a witch with human blood like you
would have weaker energy. But you—yours is almost as vigorous as a
full witch without a trace of human blood.”

I leaned back and considered this new bit of
information. It was a lot to process. Only weeks ago I’d been just
like he’d said, a regular person from the Pit, a young woman with a
head filled with foolish dreams. But I trusted Fawkes, and I felt
that I was starting to understand myself better, too.

“Ada said that steel maidens were immune to
some magic,” I began. “But you were able to warm me with
yours.”

“Because your blood magic is defensive
magic. That’s why it heals you. Your magic protects you from the
kind of magic that would do you harm. It recognized that my magic
wasn’t a threat.”