WitchsSmokeAaron (6 page)

Three hours later, she was in her Jeep heading back home and more confused than when she went to the doctor. She had found him comfortable, and she did not find the session difficult, but she had no answers, and she still felt like she was on the verge of having a breakdown.

She sat down on the back porch and slowly ate one of the stuffed rolls that Carol had left. She refused to drink alcohol, afraid she would drown in the bottom of the bottle. She drank juice, not wanting the caffeine to keep her awake although she did not remember what her bed looked like.

She had no idea what she was going to do with her life from this moment forward. She had nothing she wanted to do, nothing that she wanted to see, and she was losing her needs for life. There was nothing new in the world that seemed to interest her right now, and she was losing her mind. Besides a couple of friends that she was not really close with, including Carol, there was no one she really cared for and no one who cared for her. Sure there were plenty out there that wanted to fuck her, and some that would like to own her for a trophy. But no real feelings from any of them.

This was her life, a useless leftover piece of nothing. She watched the sand on the wooden walkway to the beach get kicked up into a miniature circle. The air with the sand seemed to be darker, almost like smoke as it danced like a sand devil back and forth into the sand, then back on the wood, then back to the sand and behind a clump of sea oats and then gone, the sand drifting straight down to the ground.

Chapter Five

She could smell smoke and sandalwood and cinnamon. She closed her eyes, and then she heard a whisper. It was a male voice and deep, and she found it sensual. Well, if she was going crazy and creating a large white rabbit, it had to have a sexy whisper.

“Why are you so sad, sweet thing?” The voice was on the back of her neck, and she felt her hair stir in an imagined wind.

She decided to play this out. Nothing mattered anymore. Since she could lose herself in her imagination, she laid back with her eyes closed and talked to herself. She said the things she did not say to the doctor.

“I am sad because my life is over, can you understand that?”

She felt the stirring of the breeze over her face, almost as if a friend had started to kiss her and just touched her cheeks with a breath. Then she felt the sigh, and it was as sad as hers.

* * * *

“Yes, little one, I understand.” He did, as he had nothing to live for, but he had no way to end his life. That was part of the curse. The witch was right in one area, he had learned. He really regretted what they had done to her daughter. He had no thought to the girl’s feelings or her life after they were through with her. He only thought of his immediate pleasure. Even after he was changed by the witch, he spent a long time playing around and thinking of entertaining himself. Now he just thought of not hurting anyone and ending his life.

“Great, I am talking to myself, and I understand.”

“What can I do for you?”

“Well, you can keep me company, you can tell me you are my friend, you can talk to me. No one talks to me, they just want to fuck me. No one makes love to me, they just want to fuck me.”

* * * *

She waited. There was a long silence. Okay, she could not make an imaginary friend that would talk. She was a loser in all areas.

“Let’s start with the easy ones first. I can be with you all the time if you like, and we can talk whenever you want. What shall we talk about?”

She looked around. There was no one on her property. She knew there was no one here. She knew she was crazy. So go ahead down this road. She and her friend spent the next couple of days and nights together. It was strange and surprisingly relaxing. Maybe going insane was not a bad idea. She had to rent that old movie
Harvey
with James Stewart. Suddenly, she felt she could really relate to that man in the story who had an imaginary white rabbit as a friend.

She was in the tub relaxing in a cool bath as they talked in the afternoon. She smelled the odor she related to her hallucinations.

“So why do you think no one loves you?” The voice was always a low sensual whisper.

“Why would anyone want to love me?”

“Because you are beautiful beyond words, you are passionate more than any female I have experienced. You are intelligent and have a sense of humor. Why would some man not love you?”

“I have asked myself that question so many times, and I think I know why. It is because of the need for them to fuck me. It flares up like a big stop sign, and that becomes all they want. They no longer have any interest in anything else I might be, because my humor or my intelligence might get in the way of fucking.” She had a light citrus oil in the cool water to keep the hot summer bath refreshing.

One evening in front of the fire on the porch, they were talking about the people they had fucked, and they both agreed that no one had made love to either one of them. Then she began to laugh.

“Why are you laughing in a sound that is not funny, little one?”

“Again, I have made an illusion that is as sick as I am? So you have been fucked and have fucked a lot, but never made love to anyone. It is the same for me.”

“So, lay back, close your eyes, and let me make love to you.”

She sighed. “I am going to let my make believe friend make love to me. Sure, why not? What do I do?”

“Take the belt from your robe and use it as a blind and tie it over your eyes. Take off your robe, and lay back and relax.”

She did what she thought her mind was telling her to do and, when her eyes were covered and she was naked, she lay back on the cushions. She wondered why, if he were an imaginary friend, she had to cover her eyes.

“Put your arms over your head and spread your legs, and then leave everything to me.”

She did what her mind told her to do.

Then she felt a soft touch of lips on hers, and she sucked in a short breath. The kiss was gentle and the tongue licked her bottom lip until she opened her mouth. When the tongue invaded, it was a sweet exploration and then a withdrawal that left her wanting more. Oh, sweet God, she had to be out of her mind. The lips felt so real.

The kisses moved down her chin, her neck, tiny nips that gave her goose bumps and then the mouth found her breast. It was strange that he did not use his hands, only his mouth, but it added to the softness, the feeling of lovemaking.

He started by licking around the crease where the heavy breast lay against her ribs. The mouth left wet kisses around the globe as it moved upward. By this time, the tip of both breasts had turned to hard erect peaks. Finally, drawing wet circles around the rosy top, the lips circled and enclosed the tip and pulled it into the warmth of the mouth. Now she knew she was in trouble because the wet moisture could be felt as the soft wind was cool where she was wet.

She arched her back. It felt so good to have such a soft mouth take the breast and tease and kiss and suck it softly. The breast was so happy it softened and blossomed and filled the working mouth. Then the mouth left and moved downward, kissing each rib, circling and tonguing the indent in her stomach until she felt the heat so deep in her cunt that she knew she was wet inside and out.

She felt the soft tongue make love to her womanhood in a way that no man or woman had ever done. The mouth and tongue worshiped her with long slides of hot soft movement over every inch of her cunt. She threw her legs wide, lifting one knee, and felt the tongue roll the exposed nub and pull it slowly into a warm mouth and drag teeth across it with only enough pressure to cause a climax that was inside her with needy heat.

She pulled air into her lungs and placed her hands on her breasts to slowly pull at the nubs in the same mild way to keep the warmth her body was feeling as it was loved by the mouth at her core. She felt the tongue go over every part of that womanhood, pushing gently at each lip, tasting with satisfying fluctuations against the skin of her core, going back to the tight pucker of her ass, and circling it with tenderness that it had never felt. The tongue came back to kiss and leave wet traces along the juncture of the point where her legs met and made the fold at her body. Then it was again at that nub of pleasure, and now it blew air on it and the nub stood up. She gasped and rolled her breasts and raised her hips and then the nub and that part of her mound was enclosed in the hot mouth and it was pulled and teased and she was ready. Every muscle from her stomach to her knees tightened and threaded with expectancy, then the tongue flicked once more with pressure, and she was over the top in a climax she could not ever remember. She moaned and moaned, her whole body shook, and there was nothing but blackness behind her closed eyes.

She was not sure how long she had laid there, her body too weak to move, her arms and legs too heavy to respond. She finally got up, went up to her bed, pulled a light cover over her, and went into a deep sleep, one that she needed.

Chapter Six

She rolled over, surprised that the sun was shining in her eyes and that the phone was ringing. She fumbled for the phone and, closing her eyes as she got the receiver to her ear, mumbled hello.

“Ms. McDonna, this is Dr. Alisandro’s office reminding you that you have an appointment this afternoon at one. Thank you.”

She took and deep breath, but before she could answer, the phone disconnected. She realized the call was some type of automatic service. Shit, she did not want to visit the good doctor again. The last visit, the one that was also the first, had been too disturbing.

She got out of bed, decided to take a shower and, while her coffeemaker worked away, she would call the doctor’s office and cancel. But she felt so good after last night’s episode and the good rest that, with her hands wrapped around the coffee cup, she decided to keep one more appointment with the doctor and then not make any more.

The morning went fast, so she dressed in comfortable clothes and drove to the appointment. Her timing was good as she walked into the comfortable waiting room on time. She did not have time to sit down as the doctor’s door opened, and he beamed a large smile at her and welcomed her into his office.

* * * *

“How did things go this last couple of weeks? I was hoping we would have a session sooner. It would be good to get together two or three times a week.” He watched her expression as she drew up her knees and put her head on one as she wrapped her arms around her legs. There was a lot to be said about that defensive curled position.

* * * *

She just sat and hugged her knees. She did not know where to start. “Doctor, do we start like we did last time? Do I get to ask the question?”

* * * *

“If that is what you want. I was hoping to talk about your feelings on being scared about caring for people, but maybe your question would lead us in the correct direction, so ask away.” He had a belief that he got further by letting the patient lead the way rather than trying to push them.

* * * *

She mulled over the question, trying to find the right words and hoping that he would take it seriously and answer her. “How dangerous is it to get involved with an illusion that you create and live over and over?” She waited to hear his answer.

* * * *

He never underestimated the importance of any question asked in this room.

“Asa, losing one’s self away from the real world is never good. On the other hand, daydreaming can be a great way to find some relief from stress. In some Hindu relaxation techniques, one is taught to think of a place you would like to be, such as an island or a beach or a mountaintop. Then when stress builds up, you can always go there to find harmony in your body. The big, really big point to this, is that one must always remember that it is not real. That it is made up in the mind as a type of release so that one never gets it mixed up with the normal day-to-day world. That is when it can lose its value.”

He waited to see if she was absorbing any of this and if it was on the right track. He could see her close her eyes as she was thinking, but he did not see her muscles relax. Okay, they were on the right track, but she was not getting the answers she sought.

“Dr. Alisandro, with the Hindus and so called ghost whisperers and people who meditated, did you ever hear of anyone actually have contact with someone, both in the illusion of a sick mind and with all other contacts, did anyone actually, really touch someone who the normal world say was not there?” She let out a sigh after that long question.

He was shocked. This was really a first for him. He had worked for years with many types of mental problems, but with all that the mind could create, actual physical contact did not seem to be one that he had come across. He and all doctors in his field had run across patients who thought they had bugs under their skin. They heard noises and thought they saw people, ghosts, monsters. But he never heard of actual physical contact.

“Asa, do you mean you see someone, or talk to someone on a regular basis, someone who is really not there?”

She laughed, a low sound as she looked out at the garden. “I mean we touch. I mean he pleasures me in a way that in all the years I have never been pleasured before. I have had sex with poor men and rich men. Some were young, and some were old. I have had it from groups and from only one. I have been restrained to make a Dom happy as I had my wrists tied to each ankle, and I was stretched over bars for hours. I dressed in tight leathers and beat submissives and made them fuck me in ways they begged of me. I had sex with women so that men could watch, and I had sex with a woman because she was a friend and needed it. But in all my years, whether in boats, planes, cars, or bedrooms, I have only fucked. Now, I have had someone make love to me. Do you hear me Doc. L O V E. Someone has made love to me in a very sexual way, and he probably is not real. So where do you send me to lock me up?”