Without You I Have Nothing (3 page)

_{Beginning to look threatening, Peter straightened.}

_{Ted changed the topic quickly. “What limits are you
placing on the motor this weekend?  We don’t want old lead-foot here blowing it
up.”}

_{“He can push the car as hard as he likes. The motor
will take all he can dish out.”}

_{They were friends again as they discussed the coming
Sunday races.}

_{Peter could only think how strangely mismatched they
were. Bob, the insurance man, suave, charming and in his own estimation a skirt
chaser -Ted the accountant, rich by inheritance, scholarly in looks and so
quiet - and himself, the lumbering, useless, extremely dangerous bear, full of
jealousy and so easily angered.}

_{‘I know I am a man whose family history is shrouded
in secrecy which I jealously guard. Yes, I realize I hide my academic
achievements behind a bamboo wall. Neither of my friends knows the reasons for
my inability to cope with females. Of course, I know my face either is the
inscrutable mask of the east or reflects my quick anger. My friends have no
idea of my true financial worth nor of my academic successes. Why am I like
this?  Why can’t I let my past life be known and understood?’  Not airing his
thoughts, Peter felt miserable.}

_{Yet they were still friends. They did almost
everything together.}

_{“How was business this week, Peter?  No rain... no
crashes... so you didn’t make the usual million,” Bob sipped his beer.}

_{“You’re right. It has been quiet but this morning a
very strange thing happened. A brand new, top of the range, Mercedes arrived. It
was as if it had been attacked with an iron bar; both headlights were smashed. The
owner was a squat, revolting ‘toad’ of a man who waddled into the office.” 
Laughing, Peter continued, “God, I think he was trying to be an Australian
version of Al Capone.”}

_{Ted and Bob were enjoying the story but it was the
truth.}

_{“He was wearing a black hat pulled down to the top
of his sunglasses and his black overcoat was pulled up to his ears.”}

_{“He was wearing an overcoat in this weather?”  Bob
was incredulous.}

_{“I nearly laughed, he was so comical with those big
ears sticking out from his head but when I asked him if it was an insurance
claim, the malicious look on his face took all the laughter out of me.”}

_{Peter continued, “His exact words were, ‘No, not
insurance and the boys who did this have no further use for insurance either. I
hope their life assurance policies were paid up.’  His vicious laugh was
positively malevolent. He tossed a wad of notes onto the bonnet and when I said
we were too busy to take on this job, he merely tossed a second equally large
wad of notes to join the first and snarled, ‘Not enough eh?’}

_{His last words as his bullyboys in their car drove
him off, were ‘Four o'clock sharp.’  There was over sixteen thousand dollars on
the bonnet and he treated it like Monopoly Money.”}

_{“Who was he?”  Ted joined the conversation.}

_{“No idea,” Peter explained, “but there was a pistol
strapped to the steering column and the man who came to pick up the car was so
blonde and beautiful that I could only think of him as a ‘Pretty Boy’.”}

_{Behind the poker face he had assumed, Peter knew
that this customer was trouble with a capital ‘T’. He had spent far too many
childhood years under the influence of such characters not to recognize this
creature for what he was.}

_{“That’s business you don’t want,” was Ted’s dry
comment. “Sounds like Dingo Ryan and his son.”}

_{As a worried look fleetingly crossed Ted's face,
Peter wondered what Ted knew.}

_{“Well, at least my clients are respectable and do
the right thing,” continued Ted with a laugh before changing the topic. His
eyes glittered through his steel-framed spectacles and his boyish face was
smiling as he forgot Peter’s story and flicked at his immaculate suit where ash
had dropped from his pipe.}

_{Smiling, he continued, “You know, the only trouble
is you, Peter. You're my greatest problem. You send me work covered in grime. Can’t
you afford pens now, or don’t you care about me, trying to decipher that
scribble of yours between daubs of grease and blobs of paint?  The account you
sent me this week was covered in red paint. Were you trying to show me what
color would look good for Sunday?”}

_{“Don’t you two do anything but complain?”  Pretending
to be annoyed, slowly Peter maneuvered around them to stand where he could
watch that young woman without being obvious. “I'm the only honest worker here.
Without me both of you would starve.”}

_{That could have started the next altercation but
Peter’s mind was across the room. He knew the girls with Jennifer were
secretaries at Bob’s company, but Jennifer stood apart. He could easily believe
she was a lawyer.}

_{There was something intangibly different about her. Perhaps
her laughter was not so shrill or her gaiety so forced. Maybe it was the aloof
way that she held her head or the way she leant forward to sip her drink. Her clothing
was certainly different. She was not out to impress or draw men’s eyes. Her
skirt was not so short nor was her neckline so daring that everything was there
to ogle.}

_{No wonder Bob thought her frigid. She was different
and no matter what was making her stand apart, Peter knew he had to meet her.}

_{He noted that no males approached the three women to
ask for a dance and he wondered why. Perhaps it was Jennifer’s bearing and the
fact she was looking uncomfortable in such surroundings.}

_{“Hey, have you gone to sleep?  Ted asked you a
question,” Bob recalled him into the conversation.}

_{“I’m sorry, Ted. What was it you were saying?” 
Peter had not been listening. His mind was across the room.}

_{“What time are we collecting you and the car on
Sunday?  Practice starts at eight o'clock and Bob will need every minute
possible with the car before the first race.”  Ted’s patient tones were warm. He
knew what had drawn Peter’s attention. He almost took a fatherly interest in
Peter although their ages were so close.}

_{Bob turned to look at the girls.}

_{“Look, you’ll get nothing for your efforts from
her.”  He was doing his best to warn Peter but Peter would not listen.}

_{“Oh, for heaven’s sake, pull yourself together,” Ted
added. “If only you could see the look on your face, Peter.”  He tapped his
pipe into the ashtray and Peter knew it would be his last one for the night. “Bob
and I are off to the trots. What about grabbing a quick bite of Chinese and
coming with us?  I was given three red hot tips that are certainties.”}

_{Peter knew Ted was interested in gambling and had
money to spare. Bob always went with him but Peter doubted if either made a
fortune. He did not gamble himself - all his gambling had been with people’s
lives in the first sixteen years of his life and he had not been successful
then. He did not intend to gamble any further, and until tonight, he had always
managed to find an excuse not to join them.}

_{“I don’t think we’ll get any sense out of him until
he meets that girl,” Bob chimed in. “Come on you two, grab your glasses and
we’ll join them.”}

_{His broad shoulders edged their way through the
throng. “At least they’re from my company so we won’t seem too rude. Besides,
you both look too respectable this evening for them to recognize the ruffians I
know. Straighten your tie, Ted, and try to control yourself and don’t bore us
with figures.”  Leering in the direction of the girls, he licked his lips in
anticipation. “The figures we have in mind tonight are not found in your
ledgers.”}

_{Had they heard his words or seen his expression, the
girls would have fled, shrieking.}

_{“Still, all may not be lost. I’d rather have their
company than you two hoboes.”  Turning to Peter he ordered, “Get that lecherous
look out of your eyes and no bad language, either of you.}

_{“The blonde’s Karen. I’ve heard she’s a good sport
so she’s mine. I don’t intend to be cold in bed tonight. Peter wants
Jennifer... although heaven only knows why. Therefore, you, Ted will partner Ruth.}

_{“Don’t say I didn’t warn you, Peter. Bet you a
dinner and show you don’t get far with that little icicle.”}

_{Peter towered over Bob as the answer rumbled out.}

_“Done!”

_{“Double the bet!”  Ted couldn’t resist the wager.}

_{“Come on... they won’t eat you.”  Bob tossed the
words over his shoulder as he continued to thread his way through the crowd.}

_{Hoping his friends would not embarrass him,
reluctantly Peter followed. Somehow, he knew this meeting would be crucial.}

_{Across the room, Jennifer was still agitated. ‘Men
call me the Ice Maiden, and worse. It makes me afraid to have a date. Just
because men take a girl out to a show or dinner, they think they have to be
paid. Why should I hop into bed with a complete stranger?’  Jennifer ended her
thoughts. ‘Often they don’t even offer a bed. Instead, it is the discomfort of
a car - clumsy and physical - sheer brute force and selfish lust. If men think
I am reserved, they are right, no matter the names they provide as an
alternative.’}

_{‘The truth of the situation is that I want a man to
love and in return to be loved and treasured.’  She thought of her parents love
for each other that had withstood the test of 30 years and she longed for the
same life for herself.}

_{‘I want a man to love and in return to be loved and
treasured. I want a relationship like my parents have and they have been married
for 30 years.’}

_{Jennifer was jolted from her thoughts by a familiar
male voice.}

_{“Do you mind if we join you?”  Bob leant over Karen,
placing his hand on her shoulder in a gesture of ownership. “I’d rather have
your pretty company than have to listen to these ruffians’ complaints about
their hard week.”}

_{Peter knew he was lucky Bob had made that first
approach, as he was aware his own words would not have flowed with such
practiced ease. Instead, he would have stuttered and stammered like a mindless
oaf. Overridden by his childhood trauma, his psychology degrees would not have
helped him cope socially.}

_{Unnoticed by Jennifer, Bob and his two mates had
arrived at their table and now Peter had caught the full reaction to her
thoughts. Looking up defiantly she found herself staring into two piercing blue
eyes - the same blue eyes that had been studying her from across the room. The
owner was hovering over her chair and someone was speaking.}

_{Obviously, he believed she was glaring at him. His
handsome, rugged face flushed and he began to apologize for intruding on her
night.}

_{‘That’s polite,’ was Jennifer’s surprised reaction. ‘That’s
different. How can I explain I wasn’t annoyed with him?’  She rose to reassure
him, but it looked as if she was about to leave.}

_{Startled, Peter begged her to remain.}

_{“I'm sorry if we broke up your happy group.”}

_{“Tell us if we’re intruding and we’ll leave.”}

_{“You just said you're in no hurry, Jennifer,” chimed
in Karen, “you agreed.”}

_{Turning to Bob, she leant against him, to touch him
in a flagrant gesture of welcome. “We’re all free tonight and thought we might
go to the pictures.”  She put her head on Bob’s shoulder and her long red
fingernails looked like talons as they curved around his arm to stop his
departure.}

_{“Where are your manners, Bob?  Introduce your two
friends to Jennifer.”}

_{“I’m sorry, Jennifer. This big, uncouth bear in
man’s clothing is the wild Irishman Peter O'Brien.”}

_{He threw his head back and chuckled at Peter’s
mortification.}

_{Peter’s blush of embarrassment only brought more
hilarity from everyone except Jennifer who, expressionless, stared through
Peter.}

_{“Don’t let him lead you into any dark corners or
hold those dainty hands of yours.”  Bob’s face emphasized the lechery in his
voice and Peter could gladly have throttled him.}

_{Jennifer realized she now knew who had studied her
from across the room. Those eyes belonged to Peter.}

_{Bob’s poor attempt at humor did not impress her and
Karen, seeing that look cross Bob’s face was definitely sharpening her claws. Ignoring
the reactions, blithely Bob continued, “The other criminal is Ted.”}

_{Jennifer studied the men.}

_{Ted, a gangling, bespectacled young man with lewd
eyes and a high-pitched laugh and wearing an immaculate, expensive suit ogled
Ruth as he pulled his chair closer to her side and raised her hand to his lips.}