Wolf Spell 1 (12 page)

I looked back at Ree and realized just how stuck I was in this predicament. If I couldn’t help fix things with crossbreeds, my life would be nonexistent. Even with Jarak’s threat, I’m sure it would only be a matter of time before Ree or some other thirsty vampire found me.

I looked down at Meadow one more time, biting my bottom lip. “She has Victor now, and this is what she wants.” There, I said it aloud to someone other than Jarak.

In one fast motion, Ree had her arm around me. Tears fell down my face as I reluctantly embraced her back. I tensed up having her close to me. “Let me go get Trevor, there isn’t much time left for us to waste.” Ree tried to sound chipper as she released her embrace.

I let out a snicker, wiping off the tears. “Yeah.”

Ree stepped back from me. “She’ll be okay.”

“Okay.” My throat constricted.

Ree left the room faster than I could see her move. I didn’t want Jarak to see the uncertainty of how I felt, and I'm sure it showed on my face, so I gazed down at Meadow’s face.

I shuddered. I didn’t want to remember her like this, a frail, decrepit being that wilted before my eyes. I couldn’t help but fear she wouldn’t make it through the turning process, and she’d still die.

Footsteps shuffled up the stairs. The room spun, making me dizzy, knowing the time had come. Jarak must have sensed my anxiety because he was up on his feet, wrapping his arms around my shoulders. I clung to him, gripping my hands in the back of his shirt. My heart raced.

Victor came into the room and walked to the other side of the bed. I let go of Jarak then turned back around.

“Hold on.” Victor whispered as he picked up Meadow’s hand, holding it close to his chest. I could see tears glisten in his eyes.

“What would your choice have been?” I asked him.

He looked over at me. “This
is
my choice too. I love her and would do anything for her. This is hard for me to accept, but I want a life with her. I lost her once. I won’t do it again. I guess I’m selfish. I will do all I can to help you with her, but ultimately it will be up to you to fill in the gaps.” His voice cracked with the last word.

“I want to help, but I’m not sure what to do.” Anxiety stirred in the pit of my stomach.

He shook his head. “You’ll know what to do when the time comes. It will be like second nature to you.” He paused to take a deep breath. “Okay, you’re right. This is still new, so I will tell you what I know.”

“I
can
do this.” I was determined to help. I could feel the anticipation spread through me like wild fire. I could help. I knew it. He was right. This was inside of me. Like a hidden, or dormant secret that brimmed over, waiting for a release.

“First, close your eyes and feel deep in the pit of your stomach, feel the pull to every living thing in this room.”

I closed my eyes as Victor instructed and focused on finding the strains inside me. I released an aggravated breath. I couldn’t feel anything. Then a sharp yank inside my chest made me gasp and open my eyes wide.

“Concentrate. That was just me tugging a little to help you.”

I nodded and closed my eyes again, searching deep inside. I couldn’t help but think I was missing fairy dust or something fictional, but continued to dig deeper. Then there was magic, I felt it, several pulls tugged at me all at once. It was as if they were invisible ropes that tied me to everyone, Jarak—Meadow—Victor, even the plants that were in the room. All of them attached to my insides pulling at me with an unseen force. How did I not feel that before?

My eyes snapped open. Victor chortled a little. “You can feel it, that’s good.”

I rubbed my stomach. It wasn’t painful, but it was weird to feel so much.

“Keep your eyes closed and listen to my instructions, I’m only having you close your eyes to help concentrate. You’re not accustomed to using your skills yet.”

Obeying him, I closed my eyes once again.

“Now that you can feel all of the living sources in the room, I want you to find the one that pulls from me.”

It was harder than it sounded with so many living things in the vicinity, and feeling every one of them. I concentrated on each tug until I came to one that pulled harder; it was as if Victor had his hand on my stomach, pulling the rope. I knew without a doubt that connection belonged to him.

I nodded. “Okay.”

“Good, now I want you to follow that force, to where you feel me. This is hard to accomplish, but a good witch or warlock can un-weave the tangled mess of another’s emotions. I have no reservations about teaching you. I’m certain you’ll be better than me—with training.” He stopped, giving me time to find my way through the mess.

I became oblivious to everything around me, except for the sound of Victor’s voice and the energy I focused on. Mentally, I pictured the rope that connected him to me. It was as if it lit up in my head showing me the way. I envisioned myself moving with it, following it to him. The closer I got, the more intense the feeling became.

Heat on my cheeks made me aware of tears that ran from my eyes. I forced myself to get closer to the end of the rope, nodding my head when I knew I’d found my way.

I cried out. Afraid to focus any harder, I could feel myself backing away, loosening my grip on the rope—and possibly my sanity. This was ridiculous. How was I supposed to help her like this?

“Hold on to it—for as long as you can. At first, entering someone’s mind can be hard, even painful, but you can do it.”

I fell from the bed onto my knees with my eyes still squeezed shut. I could feel Jarak’s arms go around me, letting me know he hadn’t left me. I grasped at the pull that now tugged from all over and not just my stomach. The fiery pain of sorrow, aching, and torture from his thoughts shot through me again like a flaming arrow. Visions of harmful situations of his past flashed before my eyes, the anguish of what I’d seen flooded my mind. Emptiness overwhelmed me, and I felt alone.

“That’s enough.” Darkness overwhelmed me, breaking me free from the pain.

I opened my eyes. I looked up at Victor. I had compassion for him for the first time. I saw what he’d been through, or at least some of it and I ached for him.

“Why did you stop me?”

He looked away. “I live with that pain, and there is no reason for you to have it too.”

“Do you really feel that bad, all the time?” I pushed myself up from the floor with Jarak’s help, reclaiming my spot on the side of the bed. It was more difficult than I expected. My muscles were weak from the small test. I might as well have been trying to climb Mount Everest for as much work as I had to do to achieve this small goal. Thank goodness for Jarak or I’d never have made it back up.

“No, you took the raw emotion of pain, and it combined with my whole life’s worth of grief. You’re new. It takes a lot out of you, and until you get used to it and learn how to draw from elements around you, you will weaken fast. Where you just went into my core, is the same place you’ll have to go to fill in the dark spell of turning over.”

“How do I un-weaken, she needs me.” I slumped my shoulders with a loud sigh.

“Rest, and use the elements around you to soak up the energy.”

“Well, Trevor and Ree will be here any moment, and I want to help.”

He shook his head. “Just rest, and when the bad pain comes, that’s when you jump in.”

I nodded and crossed my arms. “Is it dangerous? I mean, are there any side affects?”

“If you don’t stop when you’ve had enough, the pain will stick to your mind, making you think it’s real, and it’s hard to break free. If your mind doesn’t break free—you could die.” He didn’t look at me.

Those last words left me shaken, and a shiver ran down the full length of my body. It wouldn’t be that bad, would it? Surely I wouldn’t die. I just lived through Victor’s excruciating pain. My hand flew to my head, where I could still feel the pulsating ache from the infernal scorching I had taken from him. A serious headache was worth helping her. Wasn’t it?

Vampire Venom

– Jarak –

Down in the dining room, we decided to wait for the vampires to finish their evening meal. Meadow would become one of them soon, and I knew Es was worried but not as much as I did. After hearing she could die doing this, I took it upon myself to try to talk her out of it.

“You can’t do this.” I ran my hands through my hair, leaning back, feeling my back thump against the wall.

“Yes I can.” Es looked up at me from the dining table chair where she planted herself.

I strode closer to her. “How am I supposed to protect you? I have no magic to intervene.” I slammed my fist down on the table.

She jumped making me feel terrible about my actions.

“I’ll be okay.” She crossed her arms in front of her.

I wasn’t sure why I cared so much. Other than the contract I had when Victor hired me to protect her, I couldn’t understand why I was angry. What was my personal attachment? I never let myself become attached to someone I guarded before. It’d been a long time since I let myself open up to possibilities and to what I thought could happen. I hoped there would be a time where it could just be her and me. No guarding, no protecting, just real life. Who was I kidding? Life would never be boring with her around. Too many people want her.

I couldn’t believe she wanted to sacrifice herself for a turning vampire. Vampires and Guardians had never gotten along for extended periods. The time I’d been here was the longest I personally ever stayed around one. Guardians protected lives, and the dark creatures took them, we were the exact opposites.

Taking a deep breath, I sighed and slumped down in the chair next to her, “Why?”

Her lip quivered. I could tell she was on the verge of crying. “Wouldn’t you do the same?”

“Why did you answer my question with a question? Besides, she’s not truly your mom.” I thought for a moment about how I would feel if we reversed roles. I didn’t talk to my family, or what was left of it anyway, but I’m sure I’d try to help them too.
Crap
, I didn’t like that she had a legitimate reason.

She tensed up. “No, but she raised me. It’s weird. I still owe her something.”

“They stole you away from your parents when you were a baby. You don’t owe them anything,” I growled.

“They’re almost ready to start. Ree just came back from
replenishing
.” She ignored my last comment, but the tremble in her voice gave away her fear.

I stood up and offered my hand to her. “I’ll walk you up.” I needed to be close to her, there was no way I could let her go by herself. All the while wishing there was something I could do to stop her.

She drew her lips together before nodding her head and reaching up to take my hand. Her hand felt so perfect in mine.
What was I thinking?
I couldn’t fall for her. She was just supposed to be someone I protected. Besides, I wasn’t nearly good enough for her.

I wanted to reach out and brush her hair away from her eyes, but I stopped myself. Every time I was around her, she stirred a deep feeling inside of me, and I wanted, needed, to be closer to her. My body ached to be with her at all times; just being in the same house didn’t cut it. I never expected to feel this close to her, this fast.

I led her to the stairs, placing my hand at the small of her back.
God, she smelled good.
At least I could be there for her, and I’d protect her at every cost. I could do that. I would be her Guardian until I died protecting her.