Wolf Watch (The Madison Wolves Book 8) (22 page)

"You're kidding, right?" I asked. "You already know the answer, Michaela."

"Tell me."

"Because if anyone found out, they would try to destroy you."

"So? We're monsters."

I looked away. "I was worried you might be monsters. That's why I left a copy at the bank. You're not monsters. But that's how people would treat you."

I looked back. "No one has flat out said it, but I knew my life was on the line the moment I decided to call Elisabeth. I didn't know it's been on the line for two weeks. But even if you have to kill me, you're not monsters. You're just people trying to live your lives."

I turned to Lara. "Will you tell me when it's time to plead for my life?"

"A few more questions," she said. "How do you propose we retrieve the video from the bank?"

"I don't know. I'll agree to whatever you want. I don't know how you can send someone, unless the bank will let you do that with a letter or something. If not, then I assumed you would send someone with me. I presumed she would have a gun or something."

"Portia and I can handle this part," Karen said. She looked at me. "You could betray us, but you won't live long enough to enjoy it."

"I have no intention of betraying you."

"Unless Greg has a better plan," Lara said, "I'll leave that with you, Karen."

She nodded.

"Does anyone have any questions?"

No one said anything until Michaela leaned forward. "I have one more. When you saw that video, what was your response?"

"Oh god," I said. "I don't know exactly. I think I said, 'Oh my god!' followed by, 'Who is that?' and 'She's amazing'. Something like that."

Michaela smiled for a moment. "I should have wagered."

I didn't understand that, but I let it go.

Lara turned to me. "Now is when you plead."

I nodded. "Before I do, I asked Elisabeth for three favors, if you decide you have to kill me."

"What are they?"

"I want a chance to say goodbye to her, but after that, I don't want to see it coming, and if you can do it so it doesn't hurt, I'd appreciate it."

"Is that it?"

"That's one. I suppose it sounded like three. Two, I asked to see Elisabeth's wolf. And third, I asked if you'd answer my questions."

Lara nodded. "If we have to kill you, we'll grant your requests. I don't want it to come to that." She took a breath. "Did you have immediate questions?"

"So many." But I looked at Michaela. "What are you?"

Michaela looked at me for a while, then she asked, "Lara?"

"Your choice, honey."

Michaela nodded then she stood up. She loosened her clothing then began to jump onto the table. By the time she landed, she wasn't a woman.

She was a fox.

She slithered out of her clothes, then stretched, her mouth dangling open and her tongue lolling out. She turned sideways, giving me a good look.

"Oh my god," I said, and I felt the tears begin to crawl down my cheeks. "She's beautiful."

"She certainly is," Lara said. "And now that you've told her that, she'll be on your side. She's very vain."

Michaela turned around and snapped her teeth at Lara, but then leaned forward and licked her face.

"She's a werefox?"

"Yes," said Lara. "She is exceedingly rare."

I stared. "Could I... Michaela, would you let me touch you?"

Michaela turned towards me and, walking carefully, she approached, but then she stopped and looked over her head at Lara.

"She's very delicate," Lara said. "It is easy to hurt her. You need to be very, very gentle."

"I will."

Michaela turned back to me then walked the rest of the way, finally turning sideways and sitting down at the end of the conference table.

Slowly I reached up and ran my hand down her fur.

"It's rough," I said.

"The guard hairs," Lara said.

Elisabeth stood up and moved to my side. "Here." She dug her fingers in, and she massaged Michaela's back a little. "Gently."

I did the same, much like I had Portia earlier.

"Up and down her spine like that," Elisabeth said. "Not the tail though. She doesn't like anyone messing with her tail."

And so, slowly, I dug my fingers into Michaela's fur, very gently pinching my way all the way up to the base of her skull.

She closed her eyes and accepted the attention.

"Put your hand on the table," Elisabeth said. So I did, and then Michaela put her paw next to my hand. Her paw was much smaller than my hand.

The tears were still crawling down my face. "Thank you," I whispered. "You are so beautiful. I never knew there were people like you. I never knew."

Michaela turned her head to look at me, and then she stood, arched her back for a moment in another stretch, and shook her fur out. Then she walked down the table again before jumping down next to Lara. She shifted back into human. She began dressing, her back to me.

"In the movies," I said, "it's slow and hurts."

"That's a long story," said Lara. "Perhaps another day."

I nodded. I liked the idea there would be other days.

Angel got up, went to the fridge, and when she came back, she had a box of tissues and a bottle of water. She set them both in front of me, and I took a minute to clean up, then opened the water and drank heavily. "Thank you, Angel."

She nodded to me.

I turned back to Lara. "If you decide to kill me, maybe at least we can talk for a few hours." She inclined her head. "And I'd love to hear a howl." At that, she smiled.

I stood up straight. "I'm not going to plead. I won't tell. No one would believe me, anyway. I'm a crackpot environmentalist. What little respect I have with anyone would be gone if I ever told. But I wouldn't. How could I? It would be going against everything I believe in. They would try to lock you up, or worse. The hunters..." I looked away. "I don't want to think about that. I won't tell. Ever."

"This story could be worth a great deal of money," Lara said.

"Yes, I've demonstrated by my current lifestyle that money is my main motivation in life." That was said sarcastically. "I'm sorry for my tone."

"No, don't be," she said. "It was an honest reaction. You could use that money to further your goals
as an environmentalist."

"Destroy what you have here so I can save a tree somewhere else? No. I won't tell. Ever."

She studied me. "What do you feel is the absolute best possible outcome from this?"

"Best?" She nodded. I turned to
Elisabeth. "That your sister still wants me."

Elisabeth didn't say anything, and I couldn't read her body language. I turned back to Lara. "That we can be friends. If there's a way to apply to join the clan, that you would welcome me."

"We can't make you a werewolf."

"Elisabeth said Scarlett's father is human."

"He is, and a few others. This is what you wish?"

I nodded. "Yes. You asked for best. That's best, or at least the start of best."

"You didn't ask for money."

"If you want to support GreEN, you know I'll accept. I don't need you to support me."

I paused.

"I'm still vegan though."

There were chuckles about that.

"I won't ex
pect anyone else to be, but I would always offer the things I make."

Lara shook her head. "I do not know that we can allow a vegan into the pack, but we will take your words to heart. Do you have anything else to say?"

"I'm sorry for the trouble I caused. I wasn't trying to cause trouble."

I turned to Elisabeth. "Please don't hate me."

"I don't," she said.

"Then that's all I have to say."

"We have a cell," said Lara. "It holds an adult werewolf. It will hold you. Is anyone expecting you for anything in the next few days?"

"No. I need to use the bathroom, and if you're locking me up, may I have something to read?"

"Elisabeth, take care of it. We'll resume in fifteen minutes."

The cell was small, cold, and boring, but they gave me a chair and some mats on the floor. Elisabeth apologized but said, "When we throw someone in here, it's usually a disciplinary matter, and curling up on cold concrete is part of it. They are usually very angry, and anything we put in here tends to get destroyed."

"It's fine."

"What do you want to read?"

"Lesbian romance."

She laughed. "No promises."

"Anything. Michaela's textbooks, if nothing else."

She nodded. "I'll send someone with something. If you need anything else, knock on the door firmly. Someone will be on duty."

I nodded. She turned to go.

"Elisabeth?"

She turned back.

"Will you hold me?"

I didn't have to ask twice. She opened her arms, and I ran to her. She wrapped her arms around me, holding me tightly. I squeezed, molding my body against hers.

We stood like that for a minute or two.

"Thank you," I finally whispered. "If it goes badly, I understand."

"I think you can have hope," she said. She kissed the top of my head. "If there's anything else I should know, you need to tell me."

"Nothing else," I said.

Slowly, she pulled away. "I'm sorry. Also, we don't know how to cook for you, so the best we can do is bread and fruit. The bread isn't vegan. It's just normal bread from the store."

"Potatoes are good, too, if they can be produced vegan. Thank you." I looked up at her. "Could you... stand to kiss me?"

She put two fingers on my chin. I closed my eyes, and a moment later, our lips met.

It was a chaste kiss compared to most of ours, but it was a kiss nevertheless.

I kept my eyes closed and stood there as she stepped away, and a moment later, the door closed behind her.

Then I slumped, and the tears began.

* * * *

I was partially cried out by the time there was a knock at the door, and a moment later it opened. Eric stepped in with a bag. By then, I was sitting on the floor, leaning against the wall with my knees drawn up. I didn't really look at him, and I didn't get up.

He set the bag down. "Books," he said. "And there's a water bottle and some food."

"Thank you."

"I'll bring tissues and a towel."

"Thank you."

He was gone a minute before he returned, setting them on the floor next to the bag.

"Our alpha is fair," he said. "She'll protect the pack, but she's fair."

I looked up at him.

"Your chances with another pack would be... well, not good. I don't know what they discussed, but she's fair."

I nodded. "Thank you. And thank Elisabeth for the books."

"Actually, I'll thank Nora. They're hers." He bent over and picked one up. "They're kind of smutty. She leaves them around the alphas' house for the rest of us to read.
I liked this one." He turned the book towards me, and I recognized one of my favorite lesbian authors.

"You read lesfic?" I asked.

"Hey, they're good stories," he said. "Sometimes the sex is hot." He shrugged. "If someone is a homophobe, he doesn't belong in this pack. Nora's not a lesbian though. She says she's pansexual." He smiled. "We went out a few times, just casual, but she's a little young."

I tried to judge his age. "How old are you?"

"Thirty-four," he replied.

"You look younger.
"

"We age, but not as fast as humans," he replied. "Well, that's not true. We mature faster, but then it all slows down in our twenties, if that makes sense."

I nodded. "Should you be telling me?"

"No one said I couldn't talk to you," he replied. "Elisabeth said to get anything you need. I thought perhaps you could use a little conversation."

"Would you get in trouble if you sat with me?"

"No." He lowered himself down the opposite wall, facing me. "But you should know. The door out of the basement is locked, and I'm a lot faster than you are, anyway."

"I wouldn't have come if I had intended to run," I said. "But thank you for telling me." I paused. "What's it like?"

"Being a wolf?"

"Yeah."

"It's what I've always known," he replied. "There are a few things that would really stand out, but I don't know if I could explain them to a human." He paused. "The smells. I know your smell is almost dead, compared to mine, and that's in this form. As a wolf, I can smell everything. Even like this, I can smell far, far better than you can. I can tell you're scared. I can smell that you and Elisabeth hugged. I can tell you're wearing Scarlett's clothes."

"Her scent lingers through a wash?"

"A little, but I'd have to sniff a lot closer. No. Her dad does the laundry in that house, and he keeps buying detergent with scent. No wolf would ever do that."

"You can smell the detergent?"

"You can, too, when it comes out of the wash. But for you, it fades. Not to us."

"Is it overpowering?"

"No. It's not like a good whiff of pepper. It's just there, along with all the other smells." He paused. "If you and Elisabeth keep seeing each other, you should change everything you do to scentless. She'll prefer your natural scent in everything. It can be hard to find scentless soap, but we can help you."

"Thank you. What else can you smell?"

"The books. The food. The exercise matt you're sitting on. I can smell that Elisabeth was in here. There is still the lingering scent from the last time this room was painted, but it's really subtle."

"When was it painted?"

"Last year, I think. If the room got more air, I couldn't smell it."

"Wow."

"I can smell your worry, and I could smell Elisabeth's." He paused. "Grief smells different. She smelled worried, but she wasn't grieving. Angel was, but it turned to hope when Elisabeth let her go in with her."

"Really?"

He nodded.

"Outside, oh my god, the smells outside. All the trees and bushes and hundreds of kinds of flowers. And all of us have our own scent, too, each of us going here and there. We play games in the woods, like hide and seek, and it can get pretty crazy by the third or fourth game, with tracks on top of tracks, trying to figure out which one is strongest."

"It sounds amazing." I shook my head. "I keep using that word."

"It's appropriate. Next, the power. Look up." I looked up at the ceiling far above me. "Twelve feet," he said. "I can touch it."

"Holy shit."

"It's hard around humans. We have to hide it. I went out with a few, but I couldn't do it. I was so afraid I would hurt her. I don't know how Lara does it with Michaela, or some of the others with their human mates."

"Elisabeth has been very gentle. She's amazing."

"Yeah." He looked away.

"A crush?"

"Yeah. But it wouldn't work. I'm too dominant."

"What does that mean?"

"I like to be the strong one in the relationship."

"That's sort of old fashioned, Eric."

"Well, Elisabeth is really, really, really dominant."

"She'd wear the pants?"

"It's not gender-based, but yeah. Don't put it that way, though." He paused. "Most of the people living here are very dominant, but somehow they make it work."

"So, Nora?"

"She's pretty cute," he said. "Do you know who she is?" I shook my head. He paused. "Do you know who lives with the alphas?"

"I presume their daughters. After that, no."

"Okay. I didn't know if you knew they had a couple of girls. Nora is their nanny."

"She's a wolf?"

"Yeah, and she's a lot of fun. I think I was just a lark. That woman could wrap anyone around her finger. I don't know whom she's seeing lately. She'll settle down with someone someday, and whoever it is won't see it coming."

I laughed.

"Boys?"

"Me? No. All girls. Women. You know what I mean."

"So, the power?"

"Yeah. I'm six-two and weigh two-thirty."

"That's a big man," I said.

"I can bench press twelve hundred."

"That sounds like a lot."

"Half a
small car."

"I suppose a female isn't as strong?"

"Don't let Lara hear you say that. She'll kick my ass to prove you wrong."

"Yeah, well, Elisabeth said Michaela kicks her ass."

Eric smiled. "With her knives yes. We're pretty proud of Michaela. So, run fast, jump far, lift cars... And I can be gentle, you know, but during the heat of things, well... A guy gets worked up. It's hard to concentrate on: Don't hurt her. Don't hurt her. Don't hurt her. You know, while you're also concentrating on everything else."

"Right," I said.

"It's maybe easier for a woman. According to Nora's books, you women take turns."

I laughed. "Yeah, not always, but yeah."

"If I were submissive, it might be easier. She could be on top."

"I think perhaps this conversation is getting a little too..."

"Right," he said with a laugh. "And then just being in fur. I can't describe that. The shift is painful. It takes three or four minutes for me."

"I saw Michaela shift in an instant."

"That's Michaela," he said.

"And I have a video. Do you know about that?"

"Yeah. You shouldn't have that. Elisabeth isn't going to live that down."

"Did I get her into trouble?"

"We're not supposed to get caught. For the head enforcer to get caught, well, that's downright embarrassing."

"Oh god. I'm so sorry."

He grinned. "She can handle it. She gives as good as she gets."

"In my video, it was instant, like Michaela."

"I can't talk about that," he said. I nodded. "So, for me the shift is painful, and it is for most wolves. Although not as bad as in the movies, where they scream for a half hour. And it's so worth it. You finish shifting, and the pain fades. You get up, and you sort of shake your fur out, fluff it up. You know?"

"Maybe."

"And stretch. On god, I love to stretch. And if I could smell everything before, I can smell everything-everything as a wolf. And those big ears." He held his hands up and rotated them around like radar dishes. "Really, really cold water isn't any fun, but I love to go for a run in the winter, when the air is crisp, and you can run and run and run and not get too hot."

He faded away for a moment then said, "That's the best part. Running. Leaping. And we play. Humans get so uptight as adults. They forget to play. Well, we play. We play all the time. Even the alphas play, and Elisabeth. You should see them. It can be hard for the humans who join us. They think they should be so
serious, that they have to work so hard. But you know? If they just play. It doesn't matter that they aren't as fast. You're never going to beat Elisabeth in anything, except possibly an argument. But she'll love if you just play."

"Really?"

He nodded. "Did you race her kayaking?"

"No. I raced Michaela. She gave me a fifty yard head start and I almost won."

"How long a race?"

"I was dead tired at the end. Maybe four hundred yards."

Eric laughed. "If you almost won, then it's because she was trying to hide what she could do."

"Oh," I said in a small voice.

"No, don't see it like that. I bet it meant a lot that you raced her. And if you ask her in the future, it will really mean a lot, now that you know about her."

"But she's not a wolf."

"She's as strong as all but the strongest men. You raced someone with the strength of a human man my size but a body her size."

"Oh my god, we went so slowly.
That first day, they were all waiting for me, weren't they?"

"They didn't mind," he said. "I heard it was a nice day on the water. The fox and Angel each got a fish. Everyone got some exercise. If they want exercise, they'll get some. Or you can always ask Elisabeth to tow you."

I laughed. "I'd be embarrassed."

"Naw, don't be. Sometimes Michaela asks for a tow. Not often. She's amazingly stubborn."

"Is that why Michaela suggested I paddle tandem with Elisabeth after that?"

"Probably," Eric replied.

I thought about it all for a few minutes. "Elisabeth is your boss?"

"Yeah. It's not like a human boss, though. And Lara and Michaela
are the alphas. I also answer to whoever is in charge of whatever detail I'm on. But that still puts me ahead of almost everyone else in the pack."

"So everyone does what you say?"

"Well, they would, but we don't do that, except for security, or if they're screwing up and we have to bash heads."