Wolver's Reward (33 page)

"Let the cub go, River, give him up."

"
Let go
," his wolf cried as it had
before. "
The others need
us.
"

No. Not this time.

"Damn it. I can't reach him from here unless
you lift him up."

Desperation gave him strength. He had to get
out, had to find the others. They'd be frightened. They'd be alone.
No one should be alone and afraid. It did something to you. It
killed you inside. He couldn't let that happen to them.

Legs and feet numbed by the cold water, he
scrambled against the walls of the bank. He could barely feel what
they touched. Twice he slid, but the third time whatever was
beneath his foot held firm. He pulled against the root and hoisted
his body another foot. The pup was lifted from his arms. One more
lost to failure.

"No!"

"I got him. Hang on."

Hand following the legs of the cub, River
looked up into the grinning face of Big Ben.

"Hang on," Ben said again.

River pressed his face against the mud of the
bank. He wasn't there, he was here, and the pup wasn't Crow.

He heard coughing and choking above him. The
pup began to cry. A good sign. And then Ben's hand was reaching out
to him, and Ben's strong arm was hoisting him up and over the bank
as if he didn't weigh much more than the pup.

River crawled on hands and knees. His back
arched and his insides heaved, bringing up the water in his stomach
and lungs. Rolling to his back, River spread his arms and looked up
into the dimming light. "Thank you," he whispered to the moon that
had yet to show her shining face.

"Any time." The blond giant stood above him,
holding the pup in the crook of one massive arm. "You okay? Don't
need another pat on the back?"

"Yeah, Ben, thanks to you, too. I'm
good."

"I'll say. How the hell'd you do that?"

"Just hung on and did my best not to get
crushed against the rocks."

"Not sure how you did that either, but I'm
talking about the other. How the hell did you flash to wolf?"

Had he? He had and worse, Ben had seen it.
"Just happened, I guess."

"Yeah, right, just happened." Ben held out
his free hand to offer River a lift to his feet, but when they were
both standing, Ben didn't let go. "You win. I couldn't have done
that. Couldn't have dived in like that either. Never seen nothing
like it."

"Yeah." How did he say what needed to be
said. "Look, Ben, you saved my life today. You saved that pup."

River nodded at the child in the big wolver's
arms. Fear and exhaustion had taken their toll. The little boy
slept against Ben's strong and comforting chest. Slowly, they began
the long walk back.

"It wasn't me who flashed, man. You went over
the moon when there was no moon. I couldn't move that fast. I
couldn't have reached him."

River knew Ben was thinking of what might
have happened. But it didn't and that was what the blond giant
needed to see.

"Damn good thing, too. If you had gotten
there first, there's no way in hell I could haul your fat ass over
that edge."

A slow grin spread over Ben's face. "Yeah, I
guess so. Still, what you did was freaky."

"Yep. That's the word. Freaky. So, could you
maybe not mention that part? I'd rather not have people staring at
me like I'm a freak."

"I hear ya." Ben shifted the child to his
other arm and kept walking. His voice went low. "Been there, done
that, makes you feel like shit." He didn't glance over at River. He
looked straight ahead, but he wasn't watching where he was going,
either. "It's why I went rogue."

"No shit?"

"No shit."

Ben was tall, broad shouldered and strong. He
had the kind of face and body that drew females like bees to honey.
He could be an ass, but he talked like a smart one. He was the
poster child for wolvers everywhere.

"Okay, I gotta ask. What's the freak, 'cause
I ain't seeing it."

"I can't read," the big wolver muttered.

"You left your pack because you can't read?"
Leaving a pack for something so trivial was a lot freakier than
can't read.

"No. I left the pack because I was made
Second. Then the Alpha took it away when he found out I couldn't
read. He told the pack why he took it away. Big Ben, the dummy. You
go from being someone important to being shit. I couldn't take it,
got in some trouble. That made it worse, so I left, went
rogue."

"You can't be dumb," River reasoned. "You
repeated what Dennis said word for word. You sounded like you knew
what the big words meant, too."

"I do. I only have to hear a definition once,
or I learn what a word means by the words around it. I don't
remember everything I hear, but if it's important, I listen and I
can repeat it back word for word. Put it on a piece of paper,
though, and it's just a jumble of stuff that doesn't make sense."
Ben shook his head sadly. "You wouldn't understand."

Reb had said that, too.

"I didn't learn to read until I was around
fifteen and I never did learn to do it really well. I get by,"
River admitted. "You know those talks the Alpha and I have every
afternoon?" He'd seen Ben's glare as he entered the RV, so he
spread his hands to protest his innocence. "His idea, not mine. He
lectures, I listen. I learn some, but half the time I don't
understand the words he uses. I feel like I need a dictionary,
except I can't spell good enough to use one."

"You can always ask me." Ben's offer was
quietly spoken without the usual chest puffing.

"I guess I could." River's head came up and
he sniffed the air. "Here they come."

Ben grinned. "And we've got something to make
them smile."

~*~

River's eyes narrowed as he watched Ben
swagger in front of a group of younger wolvers. They were looking
up at him in wide-eyed wonder, laughing when he laughed, and
inching to the edge of the benches they were sitting on when he
leaned in toward them. It was a wonder the bullshit didn't come
pouring out his eyes, the guy was so full of it. By his gestures,
he was entertaining them yet again with the story of the cub's
rescue.

Rounding the circle of spectators, River
silently accepted their touches and words of thanks. The gestures
made him uncomfortable. Crow was the hero here, not River. It was
the long dead cub's death that inspired River to learn how to swim,
and River's reasons were selfish. He'd hoped the skill would banish
Crow's ghost from his dreams.

He took a seat next to Scar, but continued to
stare at the big blond who now had the attention of a group of
females. They were watching his show and making giggling comments
to each other behind their hands. They were probably speculating
about how much of his size and strength would be found hanging
between his legs. Big Ben was in for a good time.

Reb was among the gossips and gigglers. River
watched while she gave the big blond an adoring smile. He frowned,
and all friendly thoughts for the handsome wolver vanished.

"Can't they see what an ass he is?" he
muttered.

"I don't think they're concerned about asses.
Not the kind you're talking about anyway." Scar lit another
cigarette from the stub of the one he took from his mouth. He
carefully ground the remainder into the dirt with the toe of his
boot before picking up the paper remains and depositing them in his
shirt pocket.

"I can't decide if I should kill him or keep
him," River grumbled.

Scar blew out a cloud of smoke with his
snort. "If you're going to kill someone for flirting with females,
you're going to have to kill every damn wolver you come across. The
only thing you need to worry about is whether or not your woman
says yes to the offer."

"She's not my woman."

"Then how the hell did you know who I was
talking about?"

Scar continued to watch Ben, but his smile
disappeared. "That wolver hurts the same as the rest of us. Being
big and good looking doesn't change that."

"I know. He told me about it this afternoon,"
River admitted, reluctantly torn between jealousy and guilt. "You
sound like the Alpha. Roland says we all have scars, but it's the
ones we can't see that hurt the most."

"Roland's a wise man and a good Alpha."

"Do you think so?" River was beginning to
wonder. "He asks for daily reports, but half the time I don't think
he cares. Getting a decision out of him is like pulling teeth. He
makes me go over the pros and cons of every little thing, like it
makes a difference. He's the Alpha. It's his decision, and when he
finally makes one, I have to sit and listen to why he made it. Then
he goes off into lectures on what he calls the nature of the
beast."

"And do you?"

"Do I what?"

"Listen."

"Well, yeah, he's the Alpha. I don't have a
choice."

"Sure you do. You can look like you're
listening or you can really listen." When River didn't immediately
answer, Scar nudged him with his knee. "Well? Which is it?"

"I listen," he said reluctantly. "I don't
want to, but I end up listening anyway. The way he thinks is kind
of interesting, but a little scary, too." He shrugged. "Like
assigning cabins." River paused, thinking of how to explain without
saying too much.

Because the buildings were in such bad shape,
the pack was living communally in the largest, once used as a
lodge.

Cabins, formerly used for rental, were being
repaired one at a time. Each had two bedrooms, one to the left and
one to the right, off a central living area. The bedrooms were to
be assigned to mated pairs first, in respect for their need for
privacy and the re-establishment of independent family units. There
weren't that many pairs or families.

River would have put them on a list and
checked them off in alphabetical order, or maybe thrown the names
in a hat. Roland talked about how each couple would get along with
another. That was okay, but then the Alpha started in on couple's
personal needs, some of which he probably learned from the
Mate.

"He told me stuff he probably shouldn't,
about how that played into his decision. Private shit," River
finally confided to the older wolver. "Really private shit," he
emphasized. "Like shit you really don't want to know or hear."

It was something that had been bothering him,
but there wasn't anyone he could discuss it with. He couldn't say
what he was thinking to Reb or the Mate. Scar, he knew, would at
least keep his mouth shut and not pass it on. River lowered his
voice to a whisper.

"Sometimes I think maybe he's losing it, like
maybe the snake poison did something to his brain. He shouldn't be
telling that stuff to anybody, but especially to me, a nobody."

Instead of taking his confidence seriously,
Scar laughed. "A nobody who's sleeping with his daughter."

"That doesn't mean shit and he knows it.
There's nothing between Reb and me but an occasional laugh and a
good time."

Scar kept laughing. "You just keep telling
yourself that."

"It's true, Scar. I'm just passing through,
helping out until things are settled and the pack is prepared for
the winter. I'll be gone before the first snow. She's just passing
the time with me until the right wolver comes along. We both know
it. Fate meant her to be an Alpha's Mate."

"Fate meant you to be a rogue. Seems to me
that shoe doesn't fit." Scar lifted himself from the chair, leaning
heavily on the arms. "I was meant to be a barber. Turned out that
shoe didn't fit, either," he winked, "except for being good with a
straight razor." He spread his arms. "Fate only decides where we
start out. The choices we make decide where we end up. You might
keep that in mind."

"What choice did you make, Scar?" River asked
quietly.

"I chose to kill a wolver much like Gordon,
because our Alpha wasn't like Roland. He favored his relatives. I
don't regret it. I don't regret what I've had to do since,
either."

He raised his chin to the two couples
standing with Toby and Quentin. Two others cubs, a male and female,
stood with them. The two older males raised their chins in return.
The women smiled.

"My only regrets are standing right there and
what I've done since, I've done for them. Their only crime was
standing up for the truth. They chose to come with me, and I've
spent fifteen years trying to make that up to them. Then Dennis
came along and did it for me, but..." The look he gave River was
filled with meaning. "We chose to follow. Maybe Fate put Dennis in
our path. I can't say one way or another, but they made the choice
to follow. They chose a chance to start fresh with Sweet Valley
pack, and I chose to come with them. You might keep that in mind,
too." He followed this with a wink and a lopsided grin. "Now you'll
have to excuse me. While all those sweet young things are admiring
Ben's ass, I've got a woman waiting who likes my ass just
fine."

River snapped his head around to follow the
wolver's grin. "Your woman? Darla?"

"Hey, I've always admired a woman who could
handle an ax." Scar gave the subject of his admiration a chin lift.
"She has other talents I admire, too."

Chapter 26

With two days left to go before the full
moon, River thought he was going crazy. Shifting to save the cub
must have broken something inside him, something that was supposed
to remain sealed. The moon's power had been calling to him all day.
It wasn't normal. It set his teeth on edge. He couldn't rest. If he
wasn't working, he paced. He cut more trees, trimmed the branches
from them, and hauled them in. He hauled stone from the creek bed.
He checked his snares and set new ones. He recruited Toby and
Quentin to help.