Women's Bodies, Women's Wisdom (48 page)

Neither type of functional ovarian cyst—follicular or luteal—leads to cancer. Some women have symptoms from them repeatedly, while others have them only once in a lifetime. The important point to keep in mind is that these cysts can arise in only a matter of days or hours because our bodies are able to produce ovarian cysts rapidly. They can also go away rapidly.

Benign Neoplastic Cysts

Because ovaries contain cells that are capable of growing into complete human beings, they also contain cells that are capable of growing into a wide variety of cysts and growths, reflecting our enormous creative potential. When our creative expression is frustrated, this creative energy calls our attention to it through our body and physically manifests itself in the ovary rather than moving through us smoothly into the outer world. Conventional medical training teaches that the cause of ovarian cysts is not known unless they are of the “functional” variety and related to ovulation.

Benign, nonfunctional ovarian cysts occur when those cells of the ovary that are not associated with ovulation begin reproducing. The term
neoplastic
is often used in discussing these and other growths, both benign and malignant.
Neoplasia
means “new growth.”

Other Cysts

Besides follicular, luteal, hemorrhagic, and benign neoplastic cysts, some ovarian cysts are solid in character and don’t go away after two or three menstrual cycles. This kind of cyst is assumed to be an ovarian growth arising from something other than ovulation. They require further investigation and treatment via surgery, because until a doctor has surgically removed tissue and examined it under the micro scope, it is not certain whether the cyst is benign. I’ve occasionally had patients with ovarian cysts that were present on pelvic exam and visi ble with ultrasound for many years but that did not change in any way or cause any symptoms. These women knew that they were taking a risk, in the conventional sense, by not having surgery. Some were willing to take that risk and live with their ovaries untouched and undiag nosed for years. Though this approach is not advocated by my training, I also respect the decisions of well-informed adults to avoid surgery after all the options have been thoroughly explained.

POLYCYSTIC OVARIES (PCO)

As mentioned in chapter 5, many women have a condition known as polycystic ovaries. So-called polycystic ovaries are a sign of hormonal malfunction. PCO is a complex disorder because it is so affected by a woman’s emotions, thoughts, diet, and personal history.

Doctors used to call PCO “polycystic ovary disease,” but currently PCO is considered not a disease but a sign of an underlying imbalance. It is the end result of a complex series of subtle hormonal interactions. A few cases are genetic and therefore run in families, but most cases have no known genetic link. Conventional medicine cannot explain why or how PCO occurs, but we do know that it is strongly associated with excess body fat. About 50 percent of women with PCO have excess body fat. Women with a high waist-to-hip ratio (apple-shaped figures) are more likely to experience ovarian dysfunction.
⁹

The major problems associated with polycystic ovaries are that the woman’s ovaries do not produce eggs, and her body produces too many hormones known as androgens. As a result, her periods may cease or become very irregular. Androgens occur naturally in both men and women, but in women with PCO they are present at higher levels than normal, often because of high levels of circulating insulin.
¹⁰
And high circulating insulin is a direct result of a refined-food diet that raises blood sugar too quickly. This is a crucial link for women to understand because high insulin levels are associated with so many other diseases. High blood insulin levels increase circulating androgen levels, as well as a higher risk for obesity, diabetes, heart disease, hy pertension, and hirsutism (excess facial hair).
¹¹
Chronically high lev els of androgens also prevent normal cyclic egg development in the ovary, blocking the growth and development of eggs before they reach full maturity. When a woman’s hormonal cycle is blocked by chronic androgen overproduction, neither she nor her ovaries will experience the natural cyclic changes associated with normal ovarian function. Her hormonal levels remain static. Thus, a woman’s ovaries contain many small cysts from underdeveloped eggs. On ultrasound, the ovaries look enlarged, with multiple small cysts just below the entire surface of the ovaries (hence the name “polycystic ovaries”). Dietary change often produces amazingly fast improvements. (See Master Program for Optimal Hormonal Balance and Pelvic Health in chapter 5, and also chapter 17, on nutrition.)

The Mind-Body Connection in Amenorrhea

Whenever a woman has a problem with something as complex as the ovulation process, we know that there may be a problem with the regulatory mechanism of the menstrual cycle in the brain. The hypothalamus is affected by emotional and psychological factors, such as stress and repressed pain from the past, which can cause menstrual cycle dysfunction. Because most causes of amenorrhea are hypothalamic in nature, which means they are somehow associated with alterations in the fine-tuning of brain neuropeptide levels that are poorly under stood, it is possible that the hypothalamus may have something to do with PCO. In women with PCO, the normal cyclic release of hypothal amic hormones from the brain is altered. It is not known whether this change is the result of the ovarian problem or the cause of it. It is well documented that the stress hormone cortisol also increases insulin levels. So both diet and emotional or other stresses can and do affect ovar ian function.

Stresses that have been found to suppress ovarian and menstrual cycle functioning include negative feelings about being female and also feeling subordinate or inferior. I have found that when a woman has grown up being told that women are inferior, on some level she wants no part of becoming or being a woman. In some women, these negative feelings may work in the body to cause it to stop ovulating and become more “androgynous.”
¹²
In fact, studies in female monkeys have shown that those who are in a position of social subordination will often undergo ovulation difficulties.
¹³

Studies have also shown that women who don’t ovulate may be tense, anxious, more dependent, and less productive mentally compared to ovulatory women. They may also have suppressed rage at their mothers. Some feel guilt and fear about their need for parental care and protection and also fear losing this protection. As they grow up, this can manifest as amenorrhea—an attempt to “halt” becoming fully mature women.
¹⁴

Treatment of PCO

Since standard medicine doesn’t know the cause of most cases of PCO, treatment is aimed at quelling the symptoms only. Therefore, most women are currently placed on birth control pills, antiandrogenic drugs such as spironolactone, aromatase inhibitors that change the way hormones are metabolized, insulin-lowering drugs such as metformin, and/or progestin to create cyclic menstrual periods. These treatments do not address lack of ovulation or the hormonal status of the brain, though they can be helpful. Birth control pills and progestin also prevent excess hormonal stimulation of the uterine lining. These agents, therefore, decrease the risk of uterine cancer, which may result from years of buildup of the uterine lining if a woman doesn’t have her period. Though birth control pills and other hormonal therapies do prevent some of the risks and symptoms associated with PCO, they only partially mask the problem and never address the baseline cause.

In those women who desire pregnancy, ovulation can sometimes be induced with drugs. The most common one is clomiphene citrate (Clomid).

If you have PCO, you can help restore cyclic ovulatory function through looking carefully at any negative childhood messages you may have internalized about being a fertile woman. Commit to bringing these messages to consciousness so that they no longer control your body and your ovaries. One of my patients who had been diagnosed with PCO three years before I first saw her realized that she had internalized feeling bad about herself as a woman because of being raped by her father. She unconsciously blamed her mother for not protecting her and so saw women as powerless. When she became aware of these messages, got off birth control pills (for PCO), and began to celebrate her female na ture, her periods and her ovulations reestablished themselves in about six months. (She also needed to hear from me that PCO did not need to be a lifelong, chronic condition for her.) One of the fastest ways to uncover and transform old negative messages is by affirming new, healthier ones. Paste the following affirmation on your bathroom mirror or other obvious place and say it out loud looking into your own eyes every morning and every night for at least thirty days: “I now give thanks for my fertility and my femininity. I am completely safe to be all of who I am.” (See also Master Program for Optimal Hormonal Balance and Pelvic Health in chapter 5.)

Women’s Stories

The following stories illustrate how several of my patients have used their ovarian cysts to change and improve their lives. These stories show women waking up to the messages their bodies were sending them and then changing their lives. The message to all of us is particu larly clear: to see the ways in which we participate in the dominator system and allow ourselves to be swayed by outside authorities rather than following our inner guidance. And then to appreciate how we can change our point of attraction by changing our perception and redirecting our thoughts.

Gail: Crystallized Overdrive

Gail has been a friend of mine for years. In 1989, she first consulted me about a persistent ovarian cyst, and eventually, when she was in her late thirties, it required surgery. Here is her story.

“In 1984, during a routine gynecological exam, a woman doctor found a large ovarian cyst on my left side. This sleek doctor in New York’s SoHo district announced to me that this was dangerous and that I should have surgery to remove it as quickly as possible. I should then expect to be completely laid up for about four to six weeks, she said. She, of course, would be glad to perform the surgery. All of this transpired in about fifteen minutes.

“I was terrified, completely blown away. At the time I didn’t know enough about myself to know why I was so scared by this information. As was my pattern in those days, I covered the terror by increasing my activity and going into high gear. This was supremely easy for me to do in 1984, as I was directing a massive global peace initiative that had me traveling to several different continents a month. Besides covering my feelings by going into action, I had a strong intuitive sense that this ovarian cyst was neither as urgent nor as serious as this doctor seemed to think. I did not have the surgery.

“Several years went past, and I didn’t really think about the cyst too much. I was in warrior overdrive, changing the world and lots of people’s lives while ignoring my own. Though much of this activity was positive and deeply meaningful to me, I was out of balance in my life.

“In late 1987 my father died. Though he was well into his eighties and had led a full life, I had had no idea of the impact this would have on me. I experienced a kind of spiritual crisis. Through what I consider pure grace, a friend recommended a therapist who might help me. My journey with this wonderful man changed my life. With consummate skill and rare gentleness, he empowered me to recognize and heal much about myself that I had been afraid to look at. A pattern that was enor mously important to my healing was my understanding that I had betrayed my feminine/mother and sided with my masculine/father. For much of my life this had resulted in my absolute allegiance to doing over being, thinking over feeling, and the outer world over the inner world. For me, this was a deeply personal betrayal, as well as a symbol of the collective societal betrayal of the feminine that has so profoundly wounded our culture.

“I began to experience my ovarian cyst as a physical manifestation of the warrior/masculine part of my personality that caused me to be so driven all the time. I called it ‘crystallized overdrive.’ I had betrayed my deep feminine side to such a degree that this warrior cyst was literally taking up much of the room in the feminine creative center of my body. It had grown to the size of a large grapefruit.

“Though I began to have more spiritual and emotional clarity about my cyst, I still struggled with how to deal with it on the physical level. I never felt it—I had absolutely no pain. Rather, it had a kind of looming presence, reminding me that something in me was out of bal ance.”

In the fall of 1991 Gail came to see me. Her most recent ultrasounds showed that the cyst had begun to grow again and that the inside was changing, becoming more solid and dense. When a cyst becomes more solid, it means that its fluid parts are being replaced by more cells and growth within it. It was becoming more substantial. I felt that she had watched it long enough and that these changes signi fied the potential for the cells to become precancerous. (If an individual does not heed the body’s wisdom that is announced by a bodily growth, the growth often needs to speak louder and more clearly. Thus, it may grow more quickly and become symptomatic. Nonphysiological ovarian cysts have the capacity to become large very quickly, depending upon the circumstances.) Gail was also starting to get some pressure on her bladder. I suggested surgery, since I felt that the persistent and now-changing cyst was a drain on her energy. As we have seen, unhealthy tissue literally “drains” the molecules needed for cellular metabolism from adjacent healthy tissue. (See
chapter 4
.)

A consultation with Caroline Myss confirmed my suspicions. She said that the cyst was now “waking up” and becoming active. It had the capacity to undergo rapid growth under the right circumstances. She felt that it should come out within three months. She confirmed that the growth had developed because of Gail’s conflict between her personal inner needs and the demands of her outer world. Myss also said that the energy difference between Gail and her husband was at its most extreme ever; Gail felt drawn toward the quiet, reflective archetypal feminine, just as her husband (her partner in work as well as marriage) was reaching his peak in recognition and activity in the outer world. This was recognition in which Gail could share if she wished. She felt acutely the competition between this drawing inward toward the core of her being and the demands of success in the outer world, for which she had worked for years. If she didn’t participate in this worldly success, the culture would judge that she was now “throwing it all away.” Despite this conflict between her inner and outer worlds, Gail’s ovarian wisdom was drawing her more inward than ever before in her life. This is a classic example of the type of competition in energy and body language that hits women in their ovaries.