Authors: Naomi Ragen
Women's Minyan (4 page)
Without waiting for an invitation,
ETA
and
TOVAH
exit to search through the rooms.
BLUMA
and
SHAINE RUTH
hold a consultation.
BLUMA
: Don’t say a word about the children! Unless you want all Meah Shearim to know!
SHAINE RUTH
: [
nods her agreement, in a whispered complaint.
] Why didn’t you tell me about the wedding?
BLUMA
: Rav Aaron said it would be better for you not to know….
They exit, in search of the neighbors.
FRUME
: [
off.
] Shaineleh, there’s a reason you left the door open?
Enter
FRUME
from the back door, smiling. Dragging tiredly behind her is
GITTE LEAH
,
heavy and ill-humored.
SHAINE RUTH
: [
running to
FRUME
.]
Granny.
It’s so good you’re here!
FRUME
: What did you think? That I’d leave you here on your own? Come bring a chair for your Auntie, Shaineleh. She came specially all the way from B’nai Brak [
warmly.
] Gitte Leah: Come. Sit. Rest. You deserve it.
SHAINE RUTH
brings a chair for
GITTE LEAH
,
then goes into the kitchen.
GITTE LEAH
: Good
maideleh.
I’m fainting from hunger, and my back is killing me.
BLUMA
: [
comes in and runs to
FRUME
.] Granny!
FRUME
: Bluma-leh! How pale you look! You stopped eating?
BLUMA
: [
embarrassed, eager to change the subject.
] I’m fine, really, God be blessed. [
whisper.
] Granny, where are the children?
FRUME
: This is not for you to worry about, my sweet granddaughter. Everything is arranged as it should be. Such a relief! If she has the nerve to show up now, we’ll show her a thing or two!
In the middle of
FRUME
’s
speech, enter
GOLDIE SHEINHOFF
.
SHEINHOFF, WITH HER DAUGHTER, ADINA
: [
sitting. To herself.
] Poor children! It’s so terrible!
FRUME
: [
surprised
.] What’s so terrible? To save your son’s children from more damage and pain?
ETA
and
TOVAH
peek into the room, eager for the latest gossip.
SHAINE RUTH
: [
noticing them. Warningly.
]—Granny…
SHEINHOFF
: [
to
FRUME
.] God watch over us! Aren’t they Chana’s children also? Your own daughter’s children? Don’t you have any pity for her at all?
FRUME
: No! I’m ashamed to be her mother.
SHEINHOFF
God help us!
GITTE LEAH
: If God had seen fit to bless me with twelve children instead of her…
FRUME
: Say a blessing for the three you do have, Gitte. Your health is so delicate.
SHAINE RUTH
: [
more forcefully.
] Granny…
GITTE LEAH
: What is it already Shaine Ruth? [
discovering the intruding
ETA
and
TOVAH
. Warningly.
] Oh, Mother, we have visitors.
FRUME
turns and sees
ETA
and
TOVAH
.
ETA
: [
jumping out first.
] We came to borrow a little—? [
looks enquiringly at
TOVAH
.
]
TOVAH
: Excuse me Eta. Let me…. Eta was just in the middle of making a potato kugel when she ran out of—
ETA
: Oil?
TOVAH
: [
relieved.
] Right.
ETA
: As it is written: Better fine oil than a fine neighbor…
TOVAH
: The opposite! “Better a fine neighb—”
FRUME
: [
interrupting
.] So, in the children’s bedrooms you were drilling for oil?
TOVAH
: We made a wrong turn.
FRUME
: Take our fine guests to the kitchen, girls, and
find
them anything they need. [
to herself.
] So they can
find
their way out! [
out loud.
] Don’t you see they are in a terrible rush to go home?
The four walk toward the kitchen,
ETA
and
TOVAH
dragging reluctantly behind the girls, pausing for greetings. They are overwhelmed at meeting the important Rabbi’s widow and his daughter.
TOVAH
: Shalom, Rebbitzen Sheinhoff.
ETA
: Shalom Adina.
BLUMA
and
SHAINE RUTH
hurry them off.
FRUME
:
Yenta-kvetches
! (gossiping complainers). They came to sniff out the latest gossip!
GITTE LEAH
: Tovah will soon go running off to announce it in the ritual baths, and Eta, that Red Heifer, will share it with every neighbor in the building.
FRUME
: We have to get rid of them before
she
shows up!
SHEINHOFF
: My poor grandchildren. The twins cried all the way. Malka had to carry them, in turns. She’s just a child herself.
FRUME
: [
whispering.
] Sssssh. It’s all their mother’s fault!
During this dialogue,
ETA
and
TOVAH
reenter carrying a large bottle of oil, which they will drag around with them from now on.
SHAINE RUTH
and
BLUMA
follow.
ADINA
: [
with a slight stutter, apologetically.
] Excuse me but…but not to let her see her children two whole years…? How can this be right? How can it be just?
GITTE LEAH
: As my husband the scholar says—“the belly of the wicked shall suffer want.”
SHEINHOFF
: We didn’t have a choice, Adina. Her children were suffering. Until we were finally able to restore a little order in the house—[
painfully, delicately, yet with a touch of criticism.
] When you’ll have children of your own, you’ll understand.
GITTE LEAH
: [
cruelly.
] After we merit to rejoice with you under the marriage canopy, with God’s help!
Disturbance.
TOVAH
manages to brush by a pile of books and sends them flying. She hurries to pick them up and arrange them.
FRUME
: [
examining arrangement of books.
] What’s this, Mrs. Klein? The Code of Jewish Law on top of the Bible? This is a God-fearing house!
TOVAH
: Of course. I knew that…[
hurriedly rearranges them
.]
GITTE LEAH
: Everything has to be in its place. The holiest on top, the less holy beneath it. Whoever doesn’t understand that, will wind up on the bottom, in hell!
TOVAH
: God protect us!
FRUME
: I see that you’ve struck oil, so…
They look at each other in confusion, whispering, consulting, pushing each other in different directions. They pick up the bottle of oil.
TOVAH
: Yes.
ETA
: No.
TOVAH
: [
probing
.] So, the children are all right?
ETA
: Where are they?
TOVAH
: I didn’t know what to think this morning when Shimmy didn’t go to school with her Yaakov….
GITTE LEAH
: Excuse me, but this is a family matter.
TOVAH
: We’re all one big family here.
ETA
: Not like you over there in B’nai Brak.
TOVAH
: [
offended
.] We saw they’re not here!
GITTE LEAH
: This is private!
ETA
: [
incredulous.
] Private? In Meah Shearim?
[
She laughs, indicating the window. To
FRUME
,
confidentially.
] Outside, they are saying she’s bringing the television.
FRUME
: The television!? [to
SHEINHOFF
.] And you want me to feel sorry for her!
The universal horror over the possibility of television film crews turning up, unifies the women to the extent that even
TOVAH
and
ETA
are allowed to join in.
SHAINE RUTH
: Granny, what are we going to do?!
FRUME
: I must call Rav Aaron at once!
FRUME
marches to the telephone, and the group parades behind her.
BLUMA
: Yes! Call him, Granny. Rav Aaron will tell us what to do.
SHEINHOFF
: She’s calling Rav Aaron? I also want to hear…. [
moves in closer to phone.
]
TOVAH
: [
aside.
] Oh God—watch over us…. Eta! Why didn’t you tell me that they were going to put me on the television? Come, let’s go….
ETA
: [
righteously.
] We’re not going anywhere! You yourself said we were one big family…This involves all of Meah Shearim, every God-fearing woman in Israel…. [
she fixes her wig. Whispers.
] How do I look?
TOVAH
: [
with irony.
] Like the Rose of Sharon….
FRUME
: Shhh! [
into phone.
] Hello? Rav Aaron? Shalom, shalom. Yes, it’s Frume Kashman speaking. Yes, Rav. Yes, we did exactly what you told us. Yes, your boys are here outside chanting Psalms. But Rav Aaron, what if she brings the
pork-eaters
from the television? [
listens
.] May God bless you, and every blessing to your wife, the Rebbitzen. [
she hangs up.
]
GITTE LEAH
: What did he say?
FRUME
: He said [
she pauses, striking a saintly pose, palms together, pointing upward.
] that if she only tries, this time they’ll break also her arms and legs.
SHAINE RUTH
: [
appalled, whispers to
BLUMA
.] We have to warn her….
BLUMA
: Keep out of it.
SHEINHOFF
: [
emotionally.
]
It’s forbidden for them to
touch her! You hear? To harm a hair on my Chanaleh’s head!
FRUME
: Tell it to Rav Aaron. He’s your relative.
