Wrestling Against Myself (26 page)

“I'll be good, Tiny. Promise.”

Tony wanted to say 'seeing is believing,' but figured if he did that the whole debate about Courtney revealing herself would start all over again. “I'll catch you tomorrow.”

John Sharp sat down by the lockers as Tony left. “True or not, I still think it is funny,” he said to himself when he was sure Tony couldn't hear him.

Tony made his way to his Firebird, Courtney was standing beside it watching as he approached.

“Hope I didn't keep you waiting that long,” Tony said.

“No. Is your little friend okay?”

“Who, John or Carl?”

“John, it looks like you punched him pretty hard. I thought his head was going to come off.”

Tony opened the car door for Courtney. “John will be fine, he likes when we play rough. Besides, I didn't punch him; I gave him a good old fashioned cross face. It might look like I punched him, but my hand went over his face, not through it.”

“It didn't look comfortable,” Courtney said, sounding downcast.

“I hope not. By tomorrow morning the whole school will know I beat up on him during practice.”

“At least they'll be talking about something new. But, how will they know?”

“John is probably calling people right now on his cell phone. He'll be bragging about it for months. By the time the week is over it'll be I did a cross face and broke my arm on his chin. He is really one for telling whoppers.”

“Yeah,” the sadness in Courtney's voice was evident as she settled into her seat.

Tony got in on the other side. “I wouldn't worry about what people say anyway. Rumors start and stop all the time.”

Courtney looked down but didn't say a word. Tony could tell the girl wished that the rumors about her would finally end.

“Last year, there was a rumor going around that Coach Walker mixed alcohol in with his coffee every morning. I can tell you this, he didn't find it funny, and it could have cost him his job.”

“Rumors aren't cool,” Courtney replied as Tony pulled out of the student parking lot.

“No, they aren't. But they're part of life, especially during high school. I have a theory about why rumors get started though.”

“Really?” Courtney looked up. “What's that?”

“I think rumors are started by people who think poorly about themselves. Instead of trying to get better or fixing whatever it is about them that they don't like, they bring other people down. When I hear someone spreading a rumor, I feel sorry for them.”

“Anyone ever spread a rumor about you?”

“I'm sure there have been some. Some funny, some mean, some that make me out to be some sort of super hero. Most of the rumors are just exaggerations of stuff I've done on the wrestling mat. Not surprisingly, the most outlandish ones have been started since John Sharp has joined the team.”

“I don't think John likes me very much.”

“I wouldn't say that.”

“It looks that way.”

“You got to realize that the John people see isn't the John that actually exists. John likes to put on this show that he's a tough guy that likes to bully people. But it's nothing more than an act.”

“He has me convinced.”

“I'm sure he's thrilled that you're at the school.”

“Why do you say that?”

“Because there is finally someone at school who is smaller than him.” Tony laughed.

Courtney folded her arms and pouted.

“I was only teasing. Don't be mad.”

“I'm not. It's hard being small though, you can't go on some of the rides at Busch Gardens.”

“Same thing is true when you're too fat. When I went last year there were rides that I couldn't go on.”  

“That's sad.”

“I know,” Tony said. “But, instead of making fun of other people and bringing them down, I decided to do something about myself. The only thing I got to worry about is to make sure I didn't lose the fat to inflate my ego.”

“I don't think you have. I don't hear you brag at all and I know guys who, if they had your muscles, they would brag all the time and stand around and flex and everything.”

Tony laughed. “I sometimes do that in the mirror at home, just to make sure they're real. Anyway, about John, don't take anything he says to heart. Deep down he is a good guy; he just tries to impress the wrong people.”

“Who are the right people to impress?”

“Outside of God and Jesus, no one for me. Hopefully you will figure out the same thing. As soon as you do, you won't care about what idiots say, and once you don't care, they stop spreading rumors and find someone else.”

Courtney grinned. “I haven't thought about it like that.”

“It's easy to say, but hard to do.”

“How do you know all this stuff?”

“A lot of it I learned the hard way. I was once a dopey freshman who had trouble fitting in. That's part of the reason why I got involved in wrestling. I wanted to fit in somewhere, but didn't like the football team at the time. I didn't know what I was doing and the other players made fun of me, so I quit. When wrestling came around, Coach Walker asked me to join and I figured why not. I was worse at wrestling than I was at football.”

“No way!” Courtney said as Tony pulled into her driveway.

“It's the truth. But, the one thing I do, is try to become better, no matter what the task. As long as you're competing against yourself, you'll always win. You'll see, in no time you'll find yourself fitting in, and you won't worry so much.”

“Is it obvious that I worry?”

“The first day of school when I first talked to you, I think if I would've gone 'boo!' you might have collapsed on the floor and had a heart attack.”

“I might have.” Courtney giggled. “But thanks to you, I'm starting to fit in more. People don't bother me as much, except Peter and his gang. I hope you're right though. I hope they get bored and find someone else to bother.”

“I'm glad I could help. You're kind of like the kid sister I never had.”

“I better get going, I see my mom peeking through the blinds again.”

“Tell her I said hello,” Tony said as the girl got out of his car.

“I will. I'll see you tomorrow at lunch.”

“We also got youth group tomorrow night,” Tony reminded her.

“I don't know.”

“At least think about it.”

“I'm not promising, but I will think about it,” Courtney said and then shuffled off towards her home.

Tony waited until the door closed behind her before backing out of the girl's driveway. “A boy my foot,” he said as he turned up the volume on his car stereo.

Antonio couldn't convince Courtney to attend youth group with him, even after telling her he would make sure she got a tub full of flavored popcorn. He was concerned about her reluctance to come. She wasn't opposed to talking about God or Jesus or the Bible, but whenever the topic came up about youth group, there would come a
faraway look in her eyes that Tony knew was fear.

The wrestler couldn't understand what was so scary about church as he made his way up the stairs towards the youth pastor's office. He'd always been welcomed here, and the group at lunch accepted her at the table warmly. No matter what happened at her previous church, he hoped she would get over the reluctance. He would continue to ask her, but knew he had to strike a balance or he could come across as pushy and that would make her more reluctant to come.

Tony walked in Pastor Bob's office; the man was reviewing his sermon outline. Tony sat in the plush chair opposite him until he was done.

“Mr. Tiny,” Pastor Bob said as he put his notes down. “How is life treating you?”

“Like it wants to be best friends,” Tony said, trying not to come up with an obvious poor pun about how horrible life could be, especially when he didn't believe it.

“How is the situation with the girl? Any improvements on the bullying front?”

“Most are leaving her alone. There is still a small pocket of individuals who haven't, but they've backed off.”

“That's a good sign. I hear you had a hand in that.”

“Perhaps. I just let her sit with us during lunch and give her rides home after school. I figure by the time wrestling season starts, the bullies should have found another target and she'll be okay to make it home by herself. It takes longer to give her a ride than it would for her to walk anyway.”

Pastor Bob was pleased. “Seems like you got everything under control.”

“Almost everything,” Antonio said glumly. “There are still rumors flying around. I've had several people come up to me to tell me things I've already heard.”

“Rumors about the girl?”

“Yeah. Juvenile stuff really. I don't know where people come up with this stuff.”

Pastor Bob sucked in his lips and thought. “I'm taking it that they're pretty harsh rumors.”

“Maybe not harsh,” Tony said as he leaned back in the chair. “Hurtful, that's for sure. But they’re not saying she's promiscuous or had an abortion or anything like that. But the rumors are so farfetched; I don't know why they keep going around.”

“What are the rumors?” Bob asked as he leaned forward.

“The rumor, and this is mostly from the bully Peter, is that Courtney is a boy.”

Pastor Bob hmm-ed.

“I don't believe it for a second.”

“I didn't say you should believe it. It’s like telling a boy he acts like a girl. I remember when I was a kid, the worst thing you could tell a boy was that he acted like a sissy. I'm sure you've been around when someone said 'you throw like a girl.' I've just never heard of it applied the other way around.”

“That's the thing; she doesn't act like a boy. Not at all. She might not be overly feminine like Tracy or Stephanie, but I figure that’s because she is a freshman. I mean, she wears dresses and has long hair and doesn't spit or nothing.”

Pastor Bob laughed. “Those are signs of femininity. Didn't you tell that you thought this carried over from middle school?”

“I did.”

“Maybe this is what carried over. It isn't out of the ordinary for girls to want to change their image when they enter high school. Perhaps she was a tomboy in middle school, you know, one of the guys. She might have had long hair and looked like a girl, but it stopped there. Maybe wore jeans and t-shirts, played sports. You know the type. Then she gets to high school, decides it's time to be more ladylike and some people didn't adjust to the change. Instead of trying to understand your friend is trying to mature, they took it as an insult and the petty name calling and teasing are their way of getting even.”

“That makes sense. But I don't know why Peter is involved. He's too old to have been around her when she was in middle school and he seems intent on spreading the rumor. He even came up to me and had a heart to heart. It was really weird.”

“Why is that?”

Tony thought about it. “Usually when Peter teases and bullies he leaves me out of it. But, this time, it’s like he wants my approval. I guess it bothered me that he was so sure of himself.”

“Do you think he's telling the truth?”