Authors: Diane Fanning
‘Or we’ll come in and get you,’ said the first.
Charley slid back the latch and stepped back. The door slammed open just missing her. A hand reached in, grabbing her shirt and pulling her out to the main space where they circled her. Charley looked at their faces: Madison, Ashley and Jessica, all eighth graders – intimidating eighth graders, the kind with boobs and heavy make-up.
‘You spying on us, baby bitch?’ Madison asked.
‘You gonna go running to your mama and tell on us?’ Ashley added.
‘You tell on us, you are in big trouble, girlfriend,’ the third girl, Jessica, said, backing up her friends.
‘You tell anybody what you heard in here and we’ll make sure everybody thinks you did it.’
‘Yeah, there’s three of us and one of you – our word against yours. You think you can beat those odds, asshat?’
Charley held up her hands. ‘Hey, I don’t know what you’re talking about. I heard the sound of your voices talking but I didn’t get any of the words.’
Madison gave Charley a one-handed shove to the shoulder, sending the smaller girl staggering back two steps but maintaining her balance. Madison leaned into her face, each word sending spit into Charley’s face. ‘It better stay that way, munchkin, or you’re going to regret it for the rest of your life.’
The three girls turned to walk away from her. Charley almost breathed out a sigh of relief but choked on it when Ashley spun back around to face her. Two of Ashley’s hands flashed out, pushing Charley hard. Charley staggered backwards and, failing to regain control of her equilibrium, crashed down hard on her backside. The three girls laughed. ‘You should have seen the look on your face when we opened that stall, you stupid little shit,’ Ashley said.
‘Remember that moment of fear,’ Madison added.
The three roared with laughter as they exited the restroom, leaving Charley sitting on the floor. Charley felt her fear morph into anger. She’d tell Lucy about what they did just as soon as she could.
She slipped into her American History class trying to be as quiet and unobtrusive as possible, hoping not to be noticed. She realized she’d failed at that, too, when Ms Gardner stopped talking about Fort Sumter and said, ‘Charley Spencer. You are late for class. See me after the bell.’
As the teacher laid out the events in South Carolina that signaled the commencement of the Civil War, Charley let her mind wander back to her own conflict in the restroom. What if Madison and Ashley were just trying to impress Jessica? Did they really do what they said they did? And what would they do to her if she told Lucy? They couldn’t do anything, Charley thought, because they’d be arrested and they’d be expelled. At that moment, she was certain about her course of action.
However, she changed her mind throughout the day and she encountered the girls over and over again in the hallways as classes changed. She tried to cling to the walls and become invisible but one of them always spotted her, glaring and pointing fingers in her direction. No doubt about it, she knew she now had three sworn enemies. She hoped they wouldn’t be waiting for her after school.
In class after class, she was chastised for not paying attention or belittled for not having an answer to a question. Only one teacher, Mr Spinnato, seemed to care enough to ask her if she was OK. She nodded mutely and hurried out into the hall. She could tell no one in school what she knew because everyone would know about it in an instant. She wanted to get home without being cornered again.
When she left the building at the end of the day, she made sure she flowed outside with a large crowd of students, positioning her body next to the tallest, bulkiest guys she could find. Her breath caught in her throat as she boarded her bus, fearful that one or all three of them would be waiting for her in that confined space. She scanned the seats looking for one of their dreaded faces.
Behind her, someone shouted, ‘Hey, move it!’
She hurried down the aisle and slid into the nearest seat as she continued to look at the faces of the other riders. No sign of Madison, Ashley or Jessica. A slight edge of tension eroded away during the ride. It ratcheted up again when the bus reached her stop. What if they’re waiting for me here? she wondered.
She went down the steps to the sidewalk. The doors to the condominium building seemed so far away. She wanted to run inside and cower behind the security desk until she was sure no one was following her. Instead, she straightened her spine and took deliberate steps, shuddering with relief when she was inside. She scanned the lobby, waved at the security team behind the desk and pressed the up button for the elevator.
The ascent seemed eternal. The walk from the lift to her door seemed interminable. Finally, she was there. Her hands trembled as she struggled to get the key in the lock, missing every time she turned her gaze up or down the hall to make sure no one was creeping up behind her.
At last, she was inside. She pushed the door tightly closed. And then, she shoved on it once again. She threw the deadbolt and stood stock-still feeling the fear and anxiety drain from her body. Home, she thought. Home safe and sound. A nasty little voice in her head whispered, I bet Mom thought she was safe and sound in her home, too. She pressed her skull between her hands and breathed in deeply through her nose, held it in for a moment, then let it out slowly – just like her therapist taught her. She feared she would be haunted by her mother’s brutal death for the rest of her life.
Within two minutes, she felt the calm wash over her. But the day’s tension left its scar. She wanted a cup of coffee right now more than anything. She knew her dad had forbidden anything with caffeine after school but today simply had to be an exception. It could be worse, she thought, I could have an urge to hit the liquor cabinet.
She brewed a small pot, fixed a cup and went out on the balcony to await the arrival of Kara and Ruby. As she sipped, a new course of action percolated through her thoughts. Maybe it would be better if I checked out the model apartment first. Make sure that there was a real reason to raise the alarm. Maybe they knew I was in the stall the whole time and everything they said was one big joke. Maybe they wanted me to report what they claimed to have done but actually hadn’t to make me look silly and stupid and have me labeled as a crybaby tattletale. Her thoughts were interrupted by the arrival of her little sister and the sitter.
She listened to Kara scold her about the coffee. Charley insisted she was sorry when she really was simply annoyed. Kara still treated her like a stupid, little child. Ruby’s prattling had been annoying her of late but today she welcomed it, willingly giving her hand to her sister and allowing her to drag her away from Kara’s lecture.
Ruby was on non-stop chatterbox mode. Charley nodded her head and made non-committal responses as Ruby kept the virtual monologue going. It started to give Charley a headache but it beat listening to Kara’s admonishments. She was, she believed, far too old and far too mature to have to answer to any sitter. Ruby was a baby in need of supervision, she thought, but not me.
If I want coffee after school to help me get through my homework and studying, then I should be able to have it, she told herself. A tiny internal voice said, That’s not why you had coffee today. She suppressed that bit of truth and grew determined to confront her father about the caffeine restriction. After all, she was in middle school; she was no longer a baby.
Dinner was an unbearable ordeal where her dad kept asking what was on her mind and she kept insisting that nothing was. Finally, he gave up, telling her, ‘That’s never true, Charley, there’s always something on your mind. Just remember, when you’re ready to talk about it, I am always here ready to listen.’
She thought about all the times he wasn’t there when she needed him and almost snapped out a blistering comment. But knew she was being unfair and said nothing. Once the table was clean and the dirty dishes stacked in the dishwasher, she slipped out on the balcony to call Lucy. She tried her home phone first. When she got voicemail she left her a message: ‘Lucy, I think maybe somebody I know did a bad thing but maybe she didn’t. Maybe she was just trying to act tough. Maybe she was trying to scare me. Or maybe it’s just one big joke. I don’t know what to do. I need your advice. Call me anytime, day or night.’
She thought about calling Lucinda’s cell but decided if she was still at work, she was busy with something. It’s time I stopped running to her like a baby every time I have a problem, Charley thought. It’s time I stood up for myself and solved my own problems. She formulated her schedule for the next morning. She’d set her alarm to get up before her dad and slip out of the house before he came downstairs. Then she’d go over to Twelfth and Jefferson and find out if there was any truth to what they said. If they were telling the truth, she could deliver an eyewitness account of what she saw. Or, if it was nothing, she would never speak of it again.
She went online and printed out walking directions from her condo to the apartment complex. Just over a mile and a half, she could walk that in half an hour – no sweat. And she should be able to do that, check out the scene and get to the school before the first bell. She fell asleep with a smile on her face; she had a plan of action and that was always better than sitting still waiting for things to happen.
T
he moment Charley’s alarm started to ring the next morning at five thirty, she slammed it off and got dressed. She made sure she had some money to stop at Starbucks and snuck out of the house. She avoided the lobby by taking the elevator down to the garage and slipping out through the rear entrance.
When she stepped up to the counter at the coffee shop and ordered a grande latte with an extra shot, the barista gave her a peculiar look. ‘You know that’s three shots of espresso, don’t you?’
‘Of course, I do,’ Charley said.
‘Are you sure you’re allowed to have that?’
‘I thought the customer was always right,’ Charley snapped. ‘I have the money,’ she said, slapping a ten-dollar bill on the counter. ‘I don’t think there’s a law against serving a minor coffee, is there?’
‘OK, OK, just don’t come back here whining or send one of your parents in here to yell at me,’ the barista said as she took the money and returned her change.
The pick-up counter was above her head, but she reached up and grabbed her drink when it arrived. The guy at that end said, ‘Hey, little girl, are you sure that’s yours, it’s a latte with a triple shot.’
‘It’s mine,’ Charley said through clenched teeth.
‘Are you sure you don’t you want some hot chocolate or something?’
Charley just turned and walked away. She was so tired of being treated like a child. She stalked out of the store, praying for more height soon. When she arrived at the complex, she spotted the model apartment sign displayed just as prominently as the girls had said it would be. She circled around back and saw the big trash can below a busted window.
She tossed her empty coffee cup inside the receptacle and tried to hoist herself up on top of it, but she was too short to get the needed leverage. Looking over the area around her, she spotted a pile of wooden pallets. She dragged one over next to the can, stood on it and realized she still wasn’t high enough.
She grabbed another one and struggled to get it up on top of the first. She shoved on it to make sure it was sturdy and then scrambled up on the trash receptacle. She pushed a few sweaty strands of hair out of her face and reached for the window sill. She nearly cried when her first effort to pull herself up failed. Now she was not only angry about the situation, she was mad at herself for being too small and too weak. She tried again, nearly slipped but, at last, with the help of a foot on the wall, she was able to pull herself up on the ledge and look inside.
Below her, water was running in the bathtub, slopping over the edges and flowing like a little stream out the door. She had no choice. If she wanted to get inside, she had to jump in the tub. Do I really need to? she wondered. The water’s running; obviously something they said was true. But that could be a coincidence; maybe someone turned it on to see if it worked and forgot to turn it off. She had to be sure. She clung to the sill, and made the small drop. When she pulled her hand away, she realized she’d been cut on a piece of broken glass.
She swirled her hand in the water, watching a little stream of red eddy into the tub. She used her uncut hand to grab the faucet and turn off the water. She stepped out onto the wet floor, grabbed a towel off the rack and pressed it against the cut. She turned off the sink faucet, too, and opened the medicine cabinet, searching for a bandage, but it was empty. No one lives here, dummy, she admonished herself, why would you even look?
She sniffed the air for the scent of urine but everything just smelled musty and damp. She sloshed out of the bathroom and into a bedroom where the carpet was drenched by the ankle high water. She squished across the sodden flooring to the living room where she saw the red writing on the wall and the red daisy on the carpet. The can of spray paint bobbed in the water. She picked it up and went into the kitchen.
She turned off the water running in the kitchen and opened the cabinet under the sink and sniffed. Ewww – pee. She remembered that smell from the stairway in the downtown parking garage. She was standing beside the dining-room table when the door blasted open and four uniformed officers burst into the room, guns pointed right at her.
‘Uh, uh . . .’ was the only sound Charley could make come out of her mouth.
‘Drop everything in your hands, girlie. Drop it all now,’ one of the officers shouted.
Charley looked down at the can and the towel in her hands as if seeing them for the first time. She jerked her hands open as if what she’d been holding had just burned her fingers. The can clattered on the top of the table, then rolled to a stop beside the centerpiece. The towel fell to the floor, laying on the watery surface, absorbing it for a moment, before sinking to the bottom.
‘Hands up in the air!’