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Authors: Piers Anthony

Tags: #Humor, #Fantasy, #Science Fiction, #Young Adult

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BOOK: Xone Of Contention
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When the movie ended, they made their way back outside, where the day was unconscionably bright and warm. They got in the car, which was hot, but then it cooled. It rolled back toward the house, somewhat unsteadily. Had it lost the way? Chlorine had understood that Dug was in some way guiding it, as one would a steed. She glanced at him—and was amazed.

Dug was not guiding it Nimby was. Nimby was sitting in the “driver's” seat, with his hands on the “steering” wheel. Dug was giving instructions from the other seat.

“Red light ahead. Depress brake pedal. Stop. Green light. Depress accelerator pedal.”

The car leaped ahead. But Nimby did seem to have it under control, and soon the ride steadied. He turned the wheel when Dug said, and the car turned at the same time. In due course they reached the house.

Chlorine realized that she should not have been surprised. His powers of magic were greatly diminished, but Nimby had enormous powers of comprehension, and he was here to learn about Mundania. So he was learning to travel the Mundane way. He would be learning other things as they went, so as to understand the rules of this land.

Back inside the house, they tackled the kitchen. Under Kim's guidance. Chlorine succeeded in opening and heating a can of beans and spreading jam on slices of bread. Kim did much of the rest, but it was a start. Mundanian ways were distinctly strange, but she was catching on to them.

In the evening Kim showed them what she called the TeeVee. This was a box with a screen on front, and pictures formed on it. and sound came from it. It was like a very small movie. “You can watch news. sports, sitcoms—anything you want,” Dug explained. “Or you can ignore it.”

Chlorine found herself feeling increasingly vague and awkward. When she tried to stand, she fell back into her chair, unbalanced.

“Pia!” Kim said, alarmed. “Are you all right?”

“I don't know.” Chlorine said. “I'm dizzy, and I don't feel good.”

“The diabetes!” Dug exclaimed. “We forgot about that. She has to take insulin.”

“That's right.” Kim said. “She should have had her shot before she ate.”

“Can you handle it, Kim?”

“I'm not sure. I know the principle, but I never saw her do it ”

“Then I'd better. I used to help her, way back when she first was diagnosed and was learning the dosages and technique.” He grabbed for Pia's purse and rummaged in it for something. Then he approached Chlorine. “Your body has a problem. A shot will take care of it. I'm going to have to get rather personal, but this is something you need to have and to know how to do. Lift up your skirt.”

"Lift?” she asked vaguely. This was not the kind of thing a man often asked a woman to do in company. But Nimby, who understood that she now had the same problem he had given her Xanth body, nodded. He knew she needed immediate help.

Kim reached across and pulled Chlorine's skirt up high, revealing her panties. Both Dug and Nimby saw, but neither freaked out. This was Mundania, Chlorine remembered, where things didn't work as they should.

“Ed, you need to know this too.” Dug said. “Her medicine is in this ampoule.” He was doing something with a needle. “She takes it in the high thigh, where it doesn't ordinarily show. This much, injected this way.” He brought the needle down. "Pia, don't move. I'm sorry I'll be clumsy, so there will be some pain, but it must be done. You must trust me.”

“I do,” Chlorine said. Because she knew of Dug by reputation, during his visits to Xanth. He was sincere and competent.

Kim caught hold of Chlorine, helping her to not move. “Like this,” Dug said, and jabbed the needle into her flesh.

Chlorine jumped and tried to get away, not in control of herself, but Kim held her down while Dug depressed the needle's plunger and the fluid went in. He was right: it did hurt. Then he pulled the needle out. “Swab,” he said. “We need a swab. Should have used it before, actually.”

Kim found something cool and damp, and dabbed the stuck place. The pain had been brief, and not that bad; Chlorine just hadn't been ready for anything like this. She pulled down her skirt. “Thank you,” she said, somewhat weakly. She knew the awkward process had been necessary. She had been feeling really odd.

After that they explained in detail what Pia needed, and when, and how. Nimby was paying close attention, and Chlorine knew he understood. He would see that it was done. Already she was feeling better; the shot had indeed fixed her problem. It had also shown her how much she and Nimby needed the guidance of the Companions. Without them, this could have been quite serious.

Things settled down, and they watched the TeeVee and talked. Mundania was almost becoming familiar.

Then Dug and Kim got ready to depart, for their home was elsewhere. “Tomorrow we'll show you how to ride the motorcycle,” Dug said from the car.

Nimby perked up. Kim laughed. “Yes, like the ones in the movie preview, only nobody in real life ever rides them like that.”

“Ed would have a fit if his Lemon were treated that way,” Dug said. “He loves that machine beyond all else.”

“What, beyond Pia?” Chlorine asked.

Dug and Kim exchanged a glance. “You might as well know,” Dug said. “Ed and Pia are not getting along well. So yes, he may value the Lemon beyond her.”

“Their visit to Xanth is to give them a break from routine life, so as maybe to get a new slant on their relationship,” Kim said. “We hope it works out.”

“They're good friends and good people,” Dug said. “Just not wholly compatible.”

“Xanth has a way of making things work out,” Chlorine said. “Especially romantically.”

“We know,” Kim said. “We hope it works on them.”

Then Dug started the motor, and the Neptune moved out.

“This has been a considerable day,” Chlorine said when they were alone. “Mundania isn't as backward as I expected, but on the whole I prefer Xanth. I mean, the other place.”

Nimby nodded. But of course he wasn't here to enjoy Mundania, but to explore it.

“You're in a Mundane body, without magic, so you will need to sleep too. So let's get into bed.”

They went upstairs and used the bathroom facilities. It was worse for Nimby than for Chlorine, because as a Demon he had not had natural functions, and in manform he had simply used magic to abate those he didn't care for. Now he had no way to escape them. She had to help him with the details. Fortunately, as a Demon, he also lacked a sense of privacy. She did not say so, but she rather liked having him dependent on her for help for a change. He would need help only once, in anything, but there would be a number of things to learn.

Then they got into the bed. “How are you feeling?” she asked by way of invitation.

Nimby shrugged. That left it up to her.

“Well, I'm tired and overloaded by new experience,” she said. “But I've never made love without magic, and never in someone else's body, and never to a Mundane man. That's three to two in favor of doing it now. So let's do it.”

So they did it. It was surprisingly clumsy and somewhat messy. But Chlorine didn't mind. She had wondered whether things would be as good without magic, and now she knew: they were not. She wondered why Mundanes even bothered to signal storks. But this also meant she would really appreciate it when they returned to Xanth. Now she had a basis for comparison.

“Are you sorry?” she asked him as they relaxed for sleep.

He squeezed her hand in negation. She appreciated that too. For all its negatives, this experience was like a honeymoon.

Xanth 23 - Xone of Contention
Chapter 4: TALENTS

Edsel woke in darkness. He had not availed himself of the privy section before, and now he needed to. Pia was sleeping beside him; she being more sensible about such things, had no problem. What a delight she could be, when she tried! But he knew she was serious: she still intended to divorce him when they returned to Mundania, and he would not be able to protest. So he had to hope that something happened in Xanth to make her change her mind.

Because though his passion had faded somewhat in their years of marriage, he still did love her. She could be selfish and difficult and cutting, but she could also be wonderful. Tonight had been an example. She knew exactly how to please him, and she was matchless when she tried.

He got up and crawled up the side of the nest to the ladder. He was clothed; they had dressed again, after, as neither one of them was quite used to the ways of Xanth, and wanted to be ready for surprises. He climbed down and walked toward the privy. This was just a pit covered by illusion, but it served well enough. He could see, as there was a faint glow from the ground, maybe of magical origin. He liked the ambient magic of Xanth.

He emerged from the privy and paused. Had he heard something?

“Edsel,” a voice called from the night.

“Here,” he said, surprised. “Who are you? Where are you?”

“I’m Breanna. Here by the path. Come quickly."

He walked toward her. She was standing just beyond the path, in the darkness. “What's up? I thought you were with Justin.”

“I was,” she said. “But something came up. You must come right away.”

“What came up?”

“There is danger. You must leave this place now. Come with me.”

“Danger?”

“Yes. Hurry.”

This was confusing. “I thought this place was enchanted to be safe.”

“Bad magic is coming,” she said urgently. “We must be well away before it gets here. At dawn. Far away. We must go.”

“Without Pia? Without Justin?”

“Justin is finding a safe place.” she said. “Get Pia.”

He remained bothered. “Are you sure? I mean, to sneak out in the night—”

“I am sure. Quickly, Edsel. We must go. Be very silent.”

“Okay.” He returned to the nest. “Pia,” he whispered, touching her shoulder.

She was hard to wake. It was her diabetes, he thought; when she went down, it was for the count. But he kept after her. “Pia. Wake up. We have to get out of here.”

She stirred. “Huh? Didn't I already take care of you?”

“This isn't sex. Wake up. We have to go.”

“You go. I'll stay.” She pulled the blanket over her head.

It was a struggle, but he finally got through to her. She got herself together, grabbed her purse, and followed him out of the nest. They descended the ladder and walked across to where Breanna was waiting.

“What's this?” Pia asked. “We can't go outside the enchanted area.”

“We must,” Breanna said “Danger.”

“But—”

“She says it's coming here at dawn,” Edsel said. “Bad magic. We have to clear the area before it gets here.”

Pia evidently didn't have the mental coherence to argue. “Then let's get to where I can finish sleeping ”

“This way,” Breanna said, turning to follow a small side path. Small glowing fungus growing along the sides marked it.

They followed. Edsel didn't like this, but it was the job of the Companions to keep the visitors safe, and he had to trust their judgment. They had been right about everything else.

The path wound deviously through the night. Edsel had no idea where they were going. He wanted to ask, but didn't want to be too obvious about his ignorance. So he tried to lead into it by broaching a different subject. "How did it work out with Justin?'

“Justin is finding a sate place,” she said

She had said that before “No, I mean last night You know, holding hands."

“We do hold hands.” she agreed.

"Not this way Petting.”

“We pet pets,” the girl said “They are nice.”

Something was wrong “Does this make sense to you?” he asked Pia"

“No I don't think this is Breanna ”

Uh-oh. But he had to find out. “Breanna, exactly what is this danger that's coming? We have a right to know.”

“Danger,” she said “Coming at dawn You must get far away ”

“You said that before,” Edsel said

“Before,” she agreed "You must hurry, before the danger comes at dawn '

Edsel stopped walking, and Pia stopped with him “We're not going anywhere until you answer a question how did you hold hands with Justin?”

“We do hold hands,” she agreed. “Hurry.”

"Show me how,” he said.

“This way. Down this path. Hurry.”

“Hold my hand,” he said He reached out to catch her hand.

His hand passed right through hers without touching. She was illusion.

“It s a spook.“ Pia said “We’ve been tricked.”

“For sure ” he agreed "And you know she never said 'for sure. She doesn't know about the hand holding. She's just a programmed image responding to verbal cues. I was a fool not to catch on sooner.”

This was Pia's chance to say something suitably cutting but she passed it up “Let's get the bleep back to the safe area.” He noted with bemusement that she couldn't say a bad word in the presence of even a fake underage person. That Adult Conspiracy was literal minded.

They turned back—but the path was gone The lights had blinked out, but it was more that that, there was nothing but a thick tangle of briars there.

“I think I've heard of this,” Edsel said. “It's a one-way path. See, it's still there ahead of us.”

“So's the spook,” she said nervously

Edsel thought as rapidly and well as he could, considering that his mind felt numbed “It's a programmed spook An image, with a few sentences keyed by our statements We can't go back, maybe we should go forward. You know pretend to be still taken in. So the spook won't suspect. Until we have a chance to get away.”

“Do it,” she agreed.

They faced the spook “Sorry about the delay,” Edsel said “Let's go where we're going.”

“We must go quickly,” the spook agreed “Before the danger comes at dawn."

“Yes, we must go,” he said He took Pia's hand, not for any naughty purpose, but because he knew how frightened she had to be, and wanted to reassure her “The real Breanna and Justin will discover we're gone, and come after us,” he whispered “We just have to play along until then.”

“Yes,” she agreed, terrified

They followed the spook down the glowing path Edsel turned his head to peek behind them, and saw that the path was disappearing as they went. One way, indeed. This was an aspect of magic he would have preferred not to encounter. Even if they got free of the spook, how could they ever make their way back through that jungle? They were no longer protected from dragons or tangle trees.

The path continued interminably. Now Edsel had time to consider other aspects. Why had this trap been set for them? Whoever had set it up had known something about them. Their names, that they were visitors who could be fooled. The names of their Companions, from whom they were to be separated. But who could be behind this? Or what?

The path continued, and so did the spook All they could do was follow. But Edsel kept his eyes open, watching for any escape, or even a hint of what they were caught in.

On and on Edsel's legs were getting tired, and Pia was stumbling against him. The spook had been right about wherever it was they were going being far away.

The sky began to lighten. Dawn was coming. That was a relief; at least they would be able to see something other than the glowing path. But that would not necessarily be good news. It might merely clarify how bad the trouble was.

“What's that?” Pia asked, squeezing his hand almost painfully tight.

Edsel looked. A jagged line was forming in the sky. It widened and lengthened, and light spilled out. One end was overhead; the other was touching the horizon.

“The crack of dawn!” he exclaimed, catching on.

At that, the crack wedged all the way open, and light poured across the land. The spook faded out.

The path also faded. They were left standing on a brushy plain. Ahead of them was a dark castle.

“I think that's where we are headed,” Edsel said.

Pia shuddered. “I don't want to go there.”

Edsel looked around. “I see a stream—and a boat. I think we had better borrow that boat and get away from here.”

“Yes.”

They tramped through the brush to the boat. It was tied to a deserted cabin. “We must mark this place,” Edsel said. “So we know where to return the boat.” He didn't want to think of himself as a thief.

He untied the boat and held it steady while Pia got in. There were two paddles lying along its bottom. They took these and moved into the stream. Fortunately the current was away from the castle.

The stream carried them along; they needed the paddles only to steer the boat. Soon it debouched into a lake. The castle seemed to be on the edge of the lake, so they paddled the other way.

“There's an island,” Pia said, pointing.

“Maybe that's the best place to hide,” he said. “Until Justin and Breanna come looking for us.”

“Yes ” She seemed a trifle encouraged.

They paddled toward the island. “Maybe the real deadline the spook had was to get us to that castle before the crack of dawn.” he said. “The way she vanished, and the path faded, when the light came—”

“Vampires,” she said.

“But we delayed just enough to be behind schedule. So we escaped. They can't chase us in daylight. So if Justin and Breanna come before then, we'll be all right.”

“We were such fools. We should have known.”

“My fault. I took her at her word. I really thought it was Breanna, though I see now that she was obviously phony from the outset. Next time I'll know better.” Assuming they got out of this fix. Pia's fear was evident in part by her lack of any cutting comments; she lost inspiration when nervous.

The island looked lovely, but Edsel did not trust that. He paddled around it, looking for anything suspicious.

“Oh, come on,” Pia said impatiently. “I need to get steady so I can take my shot, use the toilet, clean up, and get the bleep off my feet.”

Edsel didn't argue. Pia had to keep her shot schedule, which included checking her blood sugar. She had to have rest after exertion, or she would get out of adJustinent. It could be dangerous to mess that up. So he guided the boat to an inlet with a small beach and drove the prow ashore so it would be anchored.

Pia stepped out first. He caught a glimpse of her high thigh as she lifted her leg, but didn't say anything. He still liked such views, though her legs were thicker than they had been. As her foot touched the sand, she paused, then completed her motion. Then he got out—and felt something like a mild electric shock as his shoe landed.

“You felt it too?” Pia asked.

“Yes. Static electricity?”

“Must be.” Then she moved off to the bushes to handle her business, while he hauled the boat the rest of the way to the land.

There was a cluster of what looked like stalks of straw sticking out of the ground. Edsel had a notion, so he picked one and bit on the end. Sure enough; it was a strawberry. “We have breakfast,” he announced.

“Good. I'm famished.”

He sat on the beach and chewed on the straw. He tried to conjure a solid illusion, but nothing happened. He tried again, and nothing happened again.

Alarmed, he called to Pia; “How's your magic talent doing?”

“I haven't thought of it since yesterday, when all it showed me was a walk along a wooded shore.?” Then she paused. ”Oh, no! I just realized that it's this shore. I thought it looked familiar, but didn't place it before."

“But that makes sense,” he said. “You couldn't change that view— because it wasn't anything you were doing then that affected it. It was the spook in the night. If we'd said no to it, that would have changed our future.”

She emerged from the brush. “That's right! Sometimes you remind me what I saw in you.”

His cleverness in figuring things out, at least if they resembled computer programming in any way. His mind worked in flow charts, this leading to that, that leading to the other, and the whole process leading to a feasible process of software. "But I was a bit late figuring this one out.” he said ruefully.

“I feel better anyway,” she said, stopping to kiss him briefly. He liked that too; she had friendly little ways. Of course they didn't mean anything, they were just social manners.

“Have a straw,” he said, handing her one.

She tried it. “Strawberry!” Then she looked as if she had just swallowed a pun. “And I just walked into that one. I think I could almost get to like Xanth, if it weren't for the abysmal jokes.”

“They are more my speed.” he agreed. “Not for decent folk. But about your talent: what do you see for tomorrow?”

She concentrated. “Nothing. It's not working.”

“That's what I was afraid of. I think we've lost our talents.”

“Lost our—how could that happen?”

“I can't be sure, but my guess is that static electricity shock we got. Maybe this island steals talents.”

“That's crazy!”

“So is Xanth.”

She nodded. “Point made.” She stretched—another gesture he liked. “But I've got to rest. Why don't you keep a lookout for Justin and Breanna while I sleep. Then I'll stand watch while you sleep.”

“Okay.” The business of the talents bothered him, but he wanted to figure it out better before scaring her with his dark conjectures.

She spied a pillow bush, harvested several nice pillows, and set them on the beach. Then she lay down on them, closed her eyes, and slept. She could do that much more readily than he could; in fact he had trouble sleeping in daylight, even when he felt logy. As he did now.

He tried again to make a solid illusion, and failed again. It definitely wasn't working. So probably he was right this island stole talents. That was why it was deserted; regular Xanth folk would know better than to set foot on it.

He found a suitable tree, sat in the sand before it, and leaned back against the trunk, looking out across the water. Justin and Breanna would have to come by water or air, and either way, this was the best way to see them. At the moment the lake was quiet, and so was the sky. There was just one puffy cloud relaxing in the sunlight, evidently having nothing better to do at the moment.

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