Yearning for Love (11 page)

Nate
:  I deserved everything Corey was saying. I deserved the coldness in her voice. I had been a complete asshole. But, dammit, I want the chance to redeem myself. I want to know that she’s willing to take me into her arms, kiss me, and allow me to make love to her. She’s become so important to me – I need her in my life, and not just as my executive assistant. I want her by my side, sharing things with me, laughing with me and sharing a bed with me. I risk a look at her – she is really angry. Her eyes have gone a very dark green, and the corners of her mouth are pulled down. I get the feeling she’s about to cry, so I look more closely into her beautiful, expressive eyes. I’m right. She has tears collecting at the bottoms of her eyes, and she’s refusing to allow them to fall. I stretch my hand out and she pulls away from me. Fuck. I really did hurt her. I may have lost her, really lost her. If that’s the case, I have to man up and handle it, but there’s going to be a huge hole in my life – and in my heart. I decide to risk everything and speak.

“Corey, I’m apologizing. I want you in my life, as more than just my executive assistant – as more than my employee. I want to make love to you . . . I want to laugh with you, and share things with you. I want to kiss you and hold you in my arms. I’m asking you to take me back.” As I speak, I stand up and run my hand gently down Corey’s face. God, I’d forgotten how silky-smooth her skin is! She tries to turn from me, but I’m too fast for her. I’m kneeling right beside her, and as she turns her head, she meets my eyes. I put my arms in a position that brackets her, so she can’t get away from me. I can’t resist her soft, delicious lips. I feel myself moving closer and closer to her, until finally, my lips make contact with hers. The shock of awareness hits her just as hard as it hits me. I place my lips gently on hers, getting her used to my being this close to her. Slowly, her lips warm up and begin moving in time with mine. I feel more brave now, so I allow my tongue to trace the shape of her beautiful, full lips. She moans, barely audibly, but I still hear it. My hands close softly over her upper arms so she can’t escape. I have to show her how I feel – but if she makes me leave, so be it. Until then, I’m working to convince her that I know how wrong I was, and how much I need her in my life. I feel her put her hands on my arms, and I slow down just a bit – is she going to push me away or pull me closer in? I feel her pulling me closer to her.

Corey
:  Oh wow, his lips are delicious! They’re a taste of heaven that I hadn’t realized I missed so much. He kisses me so softly and tenderly, he must love me. I allow him to keep kissing me, and I begin to pull him closer to me. My mouth opens, inviting his tongue to tangle with, and love, my tongue. I hear his breath beginning to rasp sharply in his throat, and I remember this sound from our lovemaking. He’s becoming fully aroused. His hands flex on my arms, squeezing and releasing them. I begin to feel a heavy fullness in my breasts, as I become aroused as well. Somehow, I untangle my legs from the position I had them in, and I accidentally kick Nate on the chest.

“I’m sorry! I just want to be more comfortable,” I mumble against his lips.

“Here,” he says. He takes one arm away from me and untangles my legs, placing them on both sides of him. Now, I’m totally open to him – well, almost. I’m still clothed, but I get the feeling that will soon be changing. Surely, he’ll tell me he loves me now! He comes in closer to me on his knees, wrapping his arms around me, and kissing me deeply. One hand slips around to my front, and he covers one breast with his hand. Ohhh! The heat! I feel my nipple beginning to bud under my pajama top, and I know Nate feels it happening, because his breath develops that sweet little hitch that’s so uniquely ‘Nate.’ I rest my hand on the soft skin of his neck, reveling in how it feels against the skin of my hand. It’s like . . . like little currents of electricity are going from him to me and back again. I feel Nate’s hand moving down to the hem of my pajama top, pulling it up and exposing my skin. As my top catches my arms, I raise them up so he can take the top off – it’s becoming a very irritating barrier between the two of us.

Nate
:  We’re kissing and she’s aroused. I need to be as close as possible to Corey. She puts one hand on the back of my neck, and it feels like a second set of lips, exchanging, not only kisses and sensation, but emotion. I pull her pajama top over her head, and she’s gloriously bare up top –
 
Oh, my God, and I had risked losing this? I allow my hand to cover one beautiful little ti,t and I feel the nipple becoming a rock-hard bud in the palm of my hand. She begins to breathe more quickly, and she pulls my own top off and over my head. I lift her up against me, so her bare feet are dangling in the air. To support herself, Corey wraps her arms around my neck. As her legs dangle in front of me, she decides she’ll be more comfortable wrapping them around my waist. Oh, my God! Now, she’s got my dick caught in between my stomach and her gorgeous pussy.

I have to sit on her bed. She allows her legs to rest on the bed in back of me. I push her pajama pants and panties down, then lift her and stand so I can strip them completely off her. I need free access to her clit.

“Put me down, Nate.” Her voice is fuzzed with desire, but I’m wary.

“Why?” I ask.

“I want to get your pants off you. Equal opportunity fondling here,” Corey says, as her voice goes lower.

I set her down, and she quickly unbuckles my belt and opens my pants. As she lowers the zipper, she allows the back of her hand to brush against my erection. My eyes close at the sensation. As soon as she’s finished torturing me, she quickly lowers my jeans and boxers down.

Corey
:  Nate bends down to pull a condom out of his wallet, and he tosses it on my bed. Sitting back down, he wraps my legs around him, and begins playing with me. First my boobs, then my pussy and clit. Soon, he has me undulating my hips and moaning into his mouth. I grab his erection and play with it. His own hips are moving back and forth, as he focuses totally on my clit, massaging and manipulating it until I feel the forest fire of desire and completion flaring inside me. The tremors start, and soon they are quakes of feeling, contraction, and sensation, as I come again and again. I squeeze his erection, not wanting to make him come.

Nate
:  I feel Corey coming against my hand, as she moans softly into my mouth. She’s mindful of her mother in her own room at the end of the hall. She stops moving her hand up and down my shaft, and instead squeezes it. I take this as a signal to scoot back on the bed and lie down on my back, placing Corey on top.

Corey:
  I’m on top and Nate has his hands around my waist, holding me above him. He lowers me slowly, then impales me with his shaft. I release a long, shaky sigh as I feel him filling me completely. I’m home –
 
I feel like I’m where I belong. The wanting and sensations are still inside me, driving me to hug his sides with my legs, and begin moving up and down. I decide to tease him – when I go up, he’s nearly completely out of me. Soon, the time for games is over –
 
my desire is rocketing up again and I begin to move up and down more forcefully on top of my lover. Nate  picks up on my new urgency and begins thrusting his own hips up and down. I feel  him flex and grow even bigger inside me, and he soon brushes against my “sweet spot,” while whispering,”You feel delicious– you turn me on so much!” Too soon, I am coming again, squeezing around him convulsively, and milking him as he comes. I moan low in my throat and he growls.

“Corey! Ahhh, God! Sweetheart, you’re so necessary to me. I just want to be with you, and make love with you over and over. “

I collapse against Nate, breathing heavily, and sighing, “Nate, you’re the best lover a girl could have!”  Soon, we fall asleep in each other’s arms, cheek to cheek, breathing in sync together. This feels right, having him back in my arms in my bed. As my eyes close, I’m aware that something is at the very edge of my consciousness, trying to get my attention. I promise myself that I’ll examine it . . . later.

Sometime later, I feel Nate’s erection prodding the side of my leg. This feeling causes me to feel horny once again, but horny towards my handsome lover, Nate. I’m still half-asleep when he positions himself over me, in between my legs. I grab his hips and pull him into me, and we begin moving in concert with each other, making sweet, fantastic love. As we do so, Nate kisses and sucks my nipples, sending a rushing sensation down to my core, where it ripples and grows. My whole being longs for him, and desires oneness with his being, with no barriers between us. What beautiful music we make, as we build to our climax! He jets inside me as he comes – then, he opens his eyes wide.

“Oh, my God, Corey. You’re not going to believe this. We just made love without a condom.”

These words pierce my lassitude and my eyes open.

“And I don’t use protection. Oh, my God, Nate!” I try to sit up, but Nate stays where he is, on top of me.

“Wait. You may not get pregnant . . .”

“Or I might!” I continue, trying to push him off me.

“Corey, what are you doing? It’s . . . there’s nothing you can do. It’s too late. I’ve already come inside you and it’s . . . it’s up there. Go get cleaned up and come back to bed. It’s cold,” Nate says.

I get up and do everything I can to get the semen out of me. Slowly, I realize he’s right, so I just clean myself up, close my robe and go back to bed. Nate feels me getting back into bed, and wraps his arms around me. I try to go to sleep, but the prospect of becoming pregnant keeps me awake. It scares me, and at the same time, excites me. There’s something else, just at the edge of my awareness, but my eyes are starting to get heavy. I promise myself once again that I will try to figure out what that is –
 
in a . . .

My eyes fly open, and I look at my bedside clock. Nearly three. I know what I was trying to remember now! Nate said I was ‘necessary’ to him . . . he just wants to be with me . . . but there was no mention of love. I roll over and look at Nate sleeping beside me, with one arm wrapped securely around my waist. I begin feeling anger growing. The knowledge that I might have been used begins slowly seeping through me –
 
which kicks my anger to a whole, new level. My mind goes over everything he said – and I verify for myself that he never mentioned “love.” My anger becomes a glowing bonfire, throwing heat. Again, I look at Nate, and I’m amazed that he can’t feel the heat of my anger. So I swat the back of my hand against him.

“Umph! Corey? You . . . wha’? What’s wrong?” Nate slurs.

“Get the hell out of my bed,” I hiss at him. I see him rub his hands over his sleepy face as he tries to catch up to where I am . . . tries to understand what I’m saying.

“Are you . . . worried about . . . I made sure the door . . . Corey, what is it?”

“‘I just want to be with you.’ You told me that I’m ‘necessary’ to you. Yeah, in bed! You tried to fool me, Mr Drummond, but I don’t fool! You want me to be with you . . . when it’s
convenient
for you. And when it’s not, then I’m the little executive assistant once again. Well, Mr. Drummond, I don’t play that kind of game! Now, get out of my bed!” I order.

Nate is fully aware now. He sits up, with a frown furrowing his brow.

“Corey, I told you that I want to be with you. I apologized for how I treated you at the hospital in El Paso. I thought I made it clear how I feel . . . I want to be with you, sweetheart. I was proposing that we be together . . .”

“Mr. Drummond
, you can take your proposal and leave my room. I don’t want it.” Fed up and out of patience, I get up, stuff my arms into my robe, and open the bedroom door. “Now,
out
.” I whisper the words so I won’t wake my mother. She knows we slept together, but there’s no need to shove it in her face, especially this way.

Nate finally gets the picture. Throwing the covers back, he gets out of bed, grabs his clothes and walks naked to his room. Before I start to cry, I softly close and lock the door, just in the nick of time. A huge tear slides down one cheek, as a sob escapes my throat. Pulling my pajamas back on, I collapse into bed, and cry into my pillow, brokenhearted. If he had only mentioned loving me, he’d still be lying here under the covers next to me. All I want is for him to admit that he loves me. This makes my decision about staying here with Mom even more important.

My breath catches in my throat and I move my hands to my tummy.
That last time, we forgot about using a condom. I could be pregnant right now. My cycle has never been very regular, so all I can do is wait to see if my next period comes. Oh, my God, how do I tell Mom, if I am?
Now I have to stay up here! I can’t take care of a baby all by myself, and hold down a full-time job, especially if I quit Drummond Oil.
I try to go back to sleep, but I can’t stop crying.

I am standing in my sun-splashed bedroom wearing a beautiful ivory wedding gown with a long veil on my upswept hair. My maid of honor and bridesmaids are putting the finishing touches on my makeup, as my mother comes into my room. Normally so collected, she’s flapping her hands nervously in the air as she looks at my bedside clock.

“Girls, hurry! The ceremony starts in less than fifteen minutes! The minister is here, all the guests are here, and Nate is waiting downstairs for Corey to become his wife!”