Years of Summer: Lily's Story (7 page)

My eyes met his for a moment and it was like I read his mind.  I gasped.  “He planned it, didn’t he; he planned it down to the most minute detail didn’t he.  He wanted to hurt me.”  I couldn’t breathe.  “He was planning to rape me, to prove he was in control, when I wouldn’t give in he hit me.  Dave didn’t just happen by, he was looking for me.  Jace how many people were looking for me?  Chance tried to get me to follow him somewhere else.” Jace just stared at me, anger was pulsing from him; he didn’t want to say anything.  I went at him; I knew he was keeping something from me.

“Jace! Tell me! How many people were looking for me?”

He hesitated.  “Eleven, plus me and Dave.”  I started hyperventilating, I realized then how close I was to possible death, but . . . I looked at Jace and he gave me his full attention. “Something kept telling me not to follow him off where he wanted to go, so I was insistent that we go back to my dorm or his dorm to talk, which is what he claimed he wanted to do.”

Jace stared at me.  He came instantly back to me and wrapped me in his arms.  I didn’t want to be let go.  “I am so sorry, Lil.  I tried; I tried to find you before it was too late.” 

Tears exploded from my eyes, as I tried speaking through them. "How did anyone know what he was going to try to do?"

Jace held me tighter, and walked me back towards the picnic table.  I was feeling as heavy as pure lead. 

“Jace . . .” I could barely whisper.  “Was he planning to kill me?”  The truth finally came out. 

He put his forehead to my forehead and kissed mine.  Then he put his cheek to my cheek and kissed it too, but he stopped there and then answered my question.  “Lily that is what we couldn’t figure out.  We didn’t know what exactly he was capable of.  That is why Chelsea called Dave.  It must have been in between the time it took for you and him to get back to his dorm, because Dave said Chance was gone and Chelsea couldn’t find you.  We were all scared to death.  Chelsea took Jillian and Brianna and Hayley and went searching for you.  Then John and I and Dave, after he told us that Chance had been bragging about hitting you, making sure you knew he was in control. Then we told Ty and Tuck and then they told Mike and Jake and then Jake told Markus and Shawn.  Lil, we were scouring the campus for you. We didn’t know where you were or what had happened; we didn’t know anything, and that was the worst part.”

“Jace, why didn’t anyone tell me?”

“Because Chance happened to mention in the shower one night to anyone who was listening, how . . .” Jace started gritting his teeth and his anger started building, so I assumed it was him that heard this first hand.

I took his hand and his eyes welled, I had never seen Jace come that close to tears before.  It ripped at my heart.  “How what, Jace?”

“How he couldn’t wait to see how scared you would get and how he would make you believe you were about to die, because he loved to see fear.  It gave him a rush, better than drugs.” 

I started freaking out.  That is when I realized that everything had been kept from me to try and keep me safe, so that I would show no fear to Chance, which seemed to make him stronger.  That is why Jace kept telling me not to be afraid, because he . . .was afraid for my life. 

I fell apart.  He tried to hold me together.  I cried for hours.  I would calm down and then start thinking about it and I would start up again.   He sat there with me until dawn, when I was finally able to completely calm down—holding me and almost crying with me.  We watched the sun come up together, I had been up for a solid twenty-four hours, never had I done that before, and Jace stayed right with me and would not let me be alone.  He walked me back to my dorm and dropped me at the door.  “Get some sleep Lily Grace.  I love you!”

I smiled back at him, “I know, thank you.” I have never felt so emotionally drained than I did that dawning. I didn’t even get a shower. I fell into my bed with Jace’s jacket on. It smelled like him. That was a comfort. I slept the entire day in between nightmares of Chance and dreams of Jace. I could not tell you what went on that day. I heard people coming in and out of mine and Chelsea’s room, she didn’t make it back either last night, but I knew she was safe, because she was with Ty. I thought I heard conversation, a sentence. “I think I will just stay with her.” I still didn’t wake. I lay there not knowing if I wanted to wake, missing someone that had suddenly become so important to me since last night. 

My mind started waking before my body did and I felt a shift in movement on my bed that wasn’t mine. I started moving. I felt stiff and sore like I had been beat up or run a marathon that I had not trained for. I moved gingerly. Then last night started coming back to me. I realized I had been in the cold too long last night, but I didn’t care. The only part I allowed myself to remember was Jace. I was still partly asleep and my thoughts turned into words in my sleep.

“Jace.” 

I felt a warm hand on my cheek and I heard a tender voice with sweet pepperminty breath.  “I’m right here, sweetie.”  I slowly opened my eyes, and they hurt, but they rested on Jace’s face and he immediately smiled.  It was warm and caring and genuine.  “Hey pretty eyes, how are you feeling?”

“Jace . . . okay.  My eyes hurt though.”  They felt red and puffy.  “How long have you been here?”

“About two hours.  I was waiting on you to wake up.”

“What time is it?”

“Four o’clock.”  I sat up and realized that I still had on my clothes from yesterday.

“Wow, I bet I look rough.”

“Yeah, you kind of do, but in an endearing way.  I tell you what.  Go get your shower, I know you’ll feel better then and I will leave, you can call me when you get out and get dressed and we will go to dinner.  I know you have to be starving.”

I panicked. “No, please don’t go. Just stay here and wait on me to get through. Please, please don’t go.” I was begging.

He took hold of my arms carefully. “Lily, calm down. Yes, okay, I will wait on you.  Don’t panic.”

I don’t know why I suddenly felt panicky. I felt like if he left he would never come back and I wanted him to come back; I needed him to come back. I walked into our walk-in closet/dressing room and took off my clothes and pulled on my bathrobe and grabbed my shower basket and towel and washcloth. 

I walked out and he laughed.  “Well don’t you look cute?”

“Promise you’ll stay?”

“I promise; I won’t go anywhere. I’ll be here when you get back.” He smiled his genuine smile, and I knew I could trust him, no matter what. I walked out the door and down the hall and climbed in the shower. 

It felt so good to have the warm water run down over me and feel like it was cleaning every bad memory and getting rid of the ones that would hurt me, yet very much fill my head with the good memories of the here and now.  I showered for thirty minutes.

By the time I made it back to my room, my bed had been straightened he had put books back on their shelf where they belonged, my school books mostly.  He had also pulled me out something to wear. It looked really cute together. Wow, he was good at cooking (found out last night), cleaning and picking out clothes, even for me. 
Wait a minute. 
“Jace you went through my clothes in my closet?” 

“Did I do something wrong?  If I did, I didn’t mean too.  I was just trying to help.”  He was really upset that he might have offended me.  Definitely something I was not used to.

I laughed at him.  “No, you didn’t do anything wrong, I am just not used to someone treating me the way you do.” 

I still had my bathrobe on and he pulled me down into his lap.  “Well you should be used to that.  I wish I had killed him when I had the opportunity.”

“Jace, I’m glad you didn’t.  I would hate to come visit you in jail, knowing that it was me who put you there.”

“Lil, you would have been worth it.”

“Okay, new rule.  No mentioning of the past, ever, if it makes either of us unhappy or angry, agreed?”

“Agreed.”  As much as he wanted too, he was sweet enough to realize that after last night’s revelation about Chance that it was going to take more time, so he kissed me on the forehead instead of the lips.  “Okay, Lily, get yourself together.  I am about to starve.” 

I took the outfit he had picked out for me to wear and went into the dressing room and changed.  When I walked back out, I looked at the outfit he had picked out that I had put on.  It was more of a date ensemble, than a hanging out around campus outfit.   “Jace why do you have me dressed like this for supper at the Caf?”

He grinned mischievously.  “Because Lily Grace, you and I are going to the movies tonight in town.  We are meeting up at the Caf with Chels and Ty, and Brianna and Dave.  The six of us are going to the movies after we eat.  How does that sound?”

“It sounds like fun.”

“Well then let’s get going.”

“Jace I have to put on my makeup, give me about five minutes.”

“Okay.”  Then he sat back down on my bed and watched as I put on my makeup.

“I know you must be bored, but thank you for staying and waiting on me.”

“I don’t know where else I would go.”

We made our way down to the Caf and met up with Ty and Chelsea, and Brianna and Dave.  After dinner we went to the movies.  I pulled out my money; Jace stuck it back in my purse.  “My treat.”

“Only if you let me get the popcorn.”

“Okay, fair enough.”

I really couldn’t tell you what the movie was about; I was too busy trying to battle with myself over whether I should let this go any farther with Jace.  Then Jace looked at me and took my hand and everything else went out of my mind.  I decided I didn’t care and that whatever happened would happen.     
 

Chapter 5

The next two weeks went by uneventful.  Jace and I became closer and I found myself falling for him, but I did not want that yet or rather I didn’t want to admit that yet.  It was getting harder to be around him because I felt my defenses wavering.  Maybe they were supposed to, but I wasn’t sure I wanted to let them go yet.  So, I continued to pretend that I didn’t want more from Jace than just a friend, but he never once was upset with me.  I appreciated him for that.

Spring Break, I was excited because I was going to get to go to the beach and also because I was going to be able to see Jace while I was there.  Before we left that Friday he gave me the number to his parents’ condo at Seaside.  Mrs. Harper decided we all could go to the beach bonfire as long as she and her husband were allowed to attend also.  The funny part was that Mrs. Harper knew Jace’s parents and that became even more of a point in our favor, because we were going to be able to stay out at the bonfire until midnight instead of the usual ten o’clock.  I couldn’t wait.

Chelsea, Brianna, and Jillian rode with me.  I drove a grand am and it had a pretty big trunk.  It was a good thing too; trying to pack four girls’ things for a four-day trip packed my poor little car to the gills.  I just prayed we wouldn’t have a flat.  Everyone chipped in for the gas and we were off.  We stopped for drinks and a snack and gas only once and by the time we made it there it was around six that night.  Mrs. Harper and her husband had already begun preparing dinner.  After we all found our spots to sleep we went back up to help with dinner.  We were having taco salads. 

Four other girls had made it there before we did, Nina and Hayley, Brooke and Jessi.  We were each assigned a task to help with dinner.  I was in charge of writing names on cups.  For some reason everyone always picked me to write things because I was an education major and they most of the time wanted the dot letters that teachers are famous for.  Anyone could have done that, but it was always me.  We stayed busy for most of the evening and everyone was there by 7:30, so we ate about that time.  After dinner we were in charge of cleaning up.  We had to put away the food and clean the dishes and things like that. It wasn’t too bad with the twenty of us helping.

Things started calming down and most of the girls, except us, had put in a movie and were watching it.  I had too much time to start thinking about Jace not being here.  I started missing him badly.  I had become used to the idea of him being around and me being able to talk to him whenever I wanted.  I needed some air, so I ran down to where we were going to sleep and pulled out my fleece jacket and put it on.  It was my favorite, light gray with ADPi embroidered in light blue with violets on either end of the words.  I came back up and told Mrs. Harper that I was going outside to sit and listen to the waves.

“Lily that is my favorite thing to do when I come out here.  If you will look in the little storage closet on the deck there are some camp chairs with footrests on them.  Come here.”

I followed her out to the deck and she showed me where the camp chairs were, and then she pointed out where the best place to sit was.  “Thanks Mrs. Harper.”