Yesterday's Sins (16 page)

Today, she settled on her kilt of Cullum tartan, her mother's tartan.

Linked to her heritage, wearing it filled her with the fierce pride of her ancestors. Today she needed every ounce of courage it offered.

As she pinned the kilt's wide pleat with the Cullum pin, tears clouded her vision. The silver claymore, with a gleaming golden topaz stone in its hilt, was the one her mother had willed to Chris.

To soften the kilt's stark lines, she wore a cream silk shirt and a saffron lacy knit mohair sweater instead of the plaid, thrown over her shoulder and shoes instead of stockings and laced boots. She didn't think it prudent to visit Alex in full warrior's regalia.

But she held few doubts he'd get the message.

She was no longer the girl he'd been known.

At her throat, she fastened the eighteenth century gold and pearl locket that now held photos of her parents and the twins as teenagers. She'd retrieved the treasured items from storage, but frowning she remembered the one thing she'd not found was the Cullum music box.

She needed to ask Alex where it was.

Once dressed, she studied her reflection in the antique cheval-glass.

She bore little resemblance, physically or emotionally, to the woman who'd stared into this same mirror almost a year ago.

And for that she thanked Emily Harder.

She'd grown very fond of Emily. She was kind and understanding but not intrusive, ready to listen and share her experience and wisdom. Kate would miss her, and Luke. They'd added richness to her life. A small compensation for the family she'd lost.

With head held high, and her heart lighter than it had been in years, Kate stepped into Cheval Realty.

"Kate. You look wonderful." Dave gripped her hands, his eyes skimming over her from head to toe. "Dressed for battle?"

Heat crept up her throat and face.
God. Am I that obvious?

Coralie Spence greeted her with a haughty reserve that sparked Kate's amusement. In the past Kate had never drawn any man's eyes away from the pretty receptionist.

And today Coralie knew the old order had changed.

"Come through to my office." Dave shepherded her through the door. "There's a lot to catch up on before you're ready to start work."

"Now for changes, Korda bought The Birches." Dave gave her a shrewd glance.

"So I've already heard." Kate was non-committal. 'The whole village is buzzing with it."

"With the amount of money he's poured into it, that's small wonder." Dave fiddled with some papers on his desk before giving her a shrewd glance. "It's said he's contemplating marriage."

Kate stiffened and then shrugged. "I hadn't heard, but it's no great surprise."

"That's not rumour," Dave said quietly. "Korda told me he wanted to get the house finished for his wife."

"It's none of my business, Dave." Kate looked him in the eye. "I walked away from him eight years ago and he's not getting any younger. Sons have always figured in his plans."

An arrow of pain stabbed her heart.

When Alex had learned she was pregnant with a girl, he'd been upset. And she'd been thrilled he'd been thwarted by Mother Nature.

And I'm far from thrilled to learn some other woman will give him the son he wanted from me.

"I thought you deserved to hear that from me, before you meet Korda."

"And I appreciate it." Kate switched the subject. "What else has been happening since I've been away?"

"Smith's farm has been subdivided into a high class residential estate and Barclay's have finally sold that hideous house they built."

Dave flipped open his listings book and together they pored over the entries, noting new additions and those either deleted or sold.

Kate pushed Dave's revelations to the back of her mind.

*****

Taking a deep, steadying breath, Kate pushed open the glass doors into the executive suite of The Korda Group new offices at Manukau City Centre.

The receptionist looked up as she crossed the plush foyer to the reception desk.

"I would like to see Mr. Alexandros Korda," Kate asked, her voice even despite the nerves twittering in her stomach.

"Do you have an appointment?"

"No, but he'll see me." She spoke with far more confidence than she felt. "Tell him Kate Audley wishes to see him for a few minutes."

"Mr. Korda sees no one without an appointment." The blonde's smile intimated she was wasting her time asking.

"I wouldn't care to be in your shoes for not telling Alex I'm here."

"I'll tell him, but he won't see you." The blonde shrugged giving her an amused glance as she flipped a switch. "Mr. Korda there's a Ms. Kate Audley at reception wishing to see you."

Kate's palms were damp. Was her confidence misplaced? Would her request be greeted with a blunt refusal? She didn't have long to wait. The elevator dinged and Alex was striding across the foyer toward her.

"Catriona." He gripped her hands between his large tanned ones. "You're back."

Kate never made the mistake of thinking his statement redundant. "Yes. I'm back."

"How was Oz?"

"The same. It's brash and noisy in the cities, sparse and lonely in the outback."

"Come through." He spoke to the receptionist, "Please ask catering to send a tea tray to my office and hold all my calls. I don't want any interruptions."

When the woman scowled, Kate couldn't suppress a smile. Alex glanced at her, amused. "Did you fall foul of Penelope?"

Kate shrugged. It wasn't important. He motioned her ahead of him into the lift and, as they glided skywards, she looked everywhere but at him. He escorted her into his office, motioning her to a comfortable chair before taking the one opposite.

"What a view." She looked out across the city toward greater Auckland and the Waitemata Harbour.

"It's almost worth coming to work to look at. And this penthouse office is one of the perks of being the boss."

She glanced at him and saw the devilish gleam in his eye and knew her dress had not gone unnoticed.

"An awesome perk." Kate was surprised by his cordial manner. And wondered how long it would last when he knew why she'd come to see him. "I must thank you for taking so much care of my financial affairs. Mr. Carmichael explained everything for me."

Alex weighed up her words. "I did what I considered in your best interests. Carmichael informed me that you wish to leave all the investments as they are?"

"He assured me your company was one of the best investments on the market in Australasia." Kate gave a deprecating shrug. "I could see no point in changing anything unnecessarily."

"He told you that all your family's personal effects are in storage?"

"Yes." Kate sighed, glancing up at him meeting his eyes before looking away. "I brought a few things home with me but haven't decided what to do with the rest."

Alex stood up as a woman brought in a tea tray. He held the door while she left. Courtesy was as ingrained in him as breathing. She watched his lithe movements as he poured them tea in fine bone china cups, taking the one he handed her.

"And Emily?"

"She can use my house as long as she wants to. Thank you for keeping it ready for me. I've enjoyed her company."

Alex sipped his tea watching her in brooding silence. "Again, I did what I thought was best. If you ever decided to return, I didn't want you greeted by strangers."

"And I appreciate it."

"You're very generous, Catriona." He sat back in his chair.

"It's Kate Audley, Alex. I may have gone back to my natural hair colour but the name stays."

"Why?"

"In a way you were right." Kate took a reflective sip of tea, and then met his eyes across the rim of the cup. "Catriona is dead, besides there's' no point. Apart from you, no one even remembers or cares."

"You're not going back to Australia?"

"Maybe for the odd holiday." She gave another expressive shrug. "Not to live."

"So everything is all neat and tidy?"
 

"Not quite." Kate looked him in the eye, noting his sudden wariness. "There's Sarah."

He put his cup on the saucer with a distinct click. "Sarah's my daughter, Kate, and she stays mine."

His clipped voice and implacable expression made her courage falter.

"I'm not about to contest that." She breathed deeply trying to steady the steel winged butterflies in her stomach.

"Then what exactly are you suggesting?"

"What have you told her about me, Alex?"

"That you were young and confused and couldn't look after her," he answered, running an agitated hand through his hair. "And God knows, it was no more than the truth."

"So you didn't succumb to the temptation to say I was dead. I was almost certain you would have. It would cover the very last loophole."

"I ensured my daughter would never be dragged around as excess baggage by an unwilling mother," he snapped. "Why should I tell her you were dead and leave the slender chance she could prove me a liar."

Kate winced. "I have no quarrel with you over her care, Alex."

"Then what is it you want?"

"I want to get to know her." She prayed she hadn't been mistaken that night at her cottage. "She's my child too."

"Something you've conveniently ignored since she was a few days old."

"Given the circumstances, most people would find that easy to forgive. Now I want to change that."

Alex paced aggressively across to his desk and then back to the chair and flung himself down. "I won't have Sarah upset. You trying to muscle in on her life will upset her."

Kate's hands clenched, but she fought down the hot, intemperate words. "You want it all your way, don't you?"

"In this instance, yes."

"What about me Alex?" she demanded in a low, tense voice.

"What about you? Are you suffering from belated mothering symptoms?"

With iron control, she tamped down her anger. She rose and walked to the window, looking at the view with unseeing eyes, breathing slowly and deeply to quell her nerves.

Then she turned to face him.

"Had I stayed with you after Sarah was born, I could never have given her a tenth of the love and care you have." She met his stern grey gaze, pushing a strand of hair back behind her ear with an unsteady hand. "I hated and resented you too much to be fair to your child."

"And what's changed?"

"I have."

Kate spread her hands wide, praying she was right. Alex had a rigid code of ethics, but would he refuse her request?

"I'm not asking for much, Alex. I need to repair my life. After all, this is a very small recompense, considering how much you owe me."