Yokai (25 page)

“
I think I need a hug
too.”

Yumiko sighed deeply and watched the
smile slide into place on Enenra’s ashen face. “You are really
pushing it, you know. I get that you don’t understand humans very
well, and you can’t really grasp the whole emotional spectrum, but
you need to be more sensitive.”

“
Is that right? I think
you’re more like me than you care to admit,” Enenra claimed boldly.
He crossed his arms as Yumiko frowned. “Shou’s right. You’re closed
off from the people around you. You hide inside yourself. You have
ever since your mother ran away and left you as a little
girl.”

“
She didn’t run away,”
Yumiko said, eyes narrowing. “She was taken from me.”

Enenra chuckled. “If you say so. But
let’s be honest for a moment, shall we? You act cold, like nothing
can hurt you. You put up a wall to push people away, because you’ve
been hurt. And you buried yourself in learning to fight yokai
because you didn’t want to be hurt again. You’ve had as little to
do with humans over the past decade as I have.”

Yumiko tried not to let his words
affect her, but she found herself shaking with rage. Even if there
was truth to his words, he had no right to rub her face in her
faults. She stomped out of the room without another word. She was
too angry to keep herself in check. And she didn’t trust that she
would be able to reply in a steady voice.

“
You felt no control in
your life,” Enenra’s voice followed her out into the hall. “Your
future had been decided for you, so you chose to hunt yokai and
become an expert at killing them so that you could control
something
.”

I control my
destiny
, Yumiko thought heatedly as she
stormed away from Enenra.
Not a day goes by
that I don’t act how I want to act. And if I decide that I want to
hunt yokai, I will. If I decide that I want to risk my life saving
Brian, I will. And if I feel like I could learn to love Brian…then
perhaps fate hasn’t dealt such a bad hand, after all.

I love Brian.

Yumiko stopped suddenly and leaned
against the wall for support as the realization hit her. She was
determined to save him. She would sacrifice herself. She would
sacrifice her friends. She would do anything to save Brian from
Shuten-Doji. Because she loved him. She didn’t know why. It was
just a feeling, an urge to protect him fiercely, then fold herself
into him. She didn’t know if she would be okay if she didn’t save
him.

Taking a deep, shuddering breath,
Yumiko realized that that scared her to death. And she also
realized that Enenra was right. Because being in love meant that
she wasn’t in control. And she very much wanted to be in control of
her emotions. But it seemed that her emotions had plans counter to
her rational mind’s.

But she would learn to live with that.
If she could hunt down and fight the most fearsome yokai out there
in a desperate bid for control, then she could look herself in the
mirror and face the truths that she found there.

Even if she didn’t like what she
saw.

Chapter
Twenty

Yumiko pulled her hair back
into a ponytail to keep it out of her face, and pulled on her
freshly-laundered jeans and t-shirt, choosing a light jacket to
throw on over it. She stared into the mirror in Brian’s bedroom for
a moment, tilting her face to and fro. She was usually so
self-conscious of who was watching her when she looked into mirrors
that she never took the time to really
look
at herself. She was striking, but
she also noticed the intense eyes, the serious set to her mouth.
Her beauty was apparent, but so also was her burden.

She stepped back and looked at her
outfit, noting that it fit her snugly. She looked like she was
ready to fight a horde of evil monsters to win back her love. The
smile that she caught in the mirror was startling. Her whole face
lifted and seemed to brighten the room. Was that how other people
saw her?

Shaking her head, she turned from her
reflection and focused on the swords hanging over Brian’s bed. She
pulled a dagger from its sheath and admired the curve of the blade.
She spied a holster on a stand, and decided that it wouldn’t hurt
to take it with her. Brian would need something to fight with, once
they freed him. And should anything happen to her mirror sword,
another option would be appreciated.

Satisfied, Yumiko stepped out of the
bedroom and started. Two steaming cups of tea were set out on the
dining table. She hadn’t heard anyone come in, but of course she
wouldn’t have, would she? Alarm clocks, doorbells, simple
knocks…how did Brian stand the deafening silence of this place? She
wasn’t sure she was suited to this world, even if she went through
with her obligations.

“
Yumiko.”

Turning her head, Yumiko’s eyes
widened as Madame Mori stepped out of the little kitchen
area.

“
Sensei!” Yumiko bowed,
relief flooding through her. “I wasn’t expecting you.”

“
Apparently,” Mori sniffed,
gesturing toward the table. “Sit. We have matters to
discuss.”

Yumiko obeyed and watched the steam
rise from her teacup as Mori took a seating position. “How did you
get here?”

“
Ame-Onna came for me,”
Mori said, taking a sip of tea. She made a face and set it back
down. “This place isn’t exactly comforting,” she noted. “But it has
its charms.”

Yumiko took a sip from her tea and saw
what she meant. The tea tasted like nothing and had no temperature,
despite the steam. It may as well have been lukewarm water. She
wondered how Brian tolerated it.

“
So, you are going to
rescue Kagami,” Mori said bluntly. “Rather ironic, wouldn’t you
say?”

Yumiko licked her lips. She hadn’t
really prepared how she was going to justify her actions to Mori,
strange as they were. But her priorities had shifted, as had her
feelings. “He’s not who I thought he was,” she said
carefully.

“
I know,” Mori agreed.
“I’ve been talking with Reina for a few hours since I
arrived.”

“
Reina?” Yumiko looked up,
confused.

“
She was the first person I
came across,” Mori waved the question away. “She filled me in on
what has transpired. And I’m happy for how things have turned out
for you. Your future looks much brighter.”

“
Assuming that we save
Brian,” Yumiko allowed. “Otherwise, it looks as if none of our
futures will be very bright.”

Mori smiled thinly at this. “You’ve
changed, Yumiko. Over the years. The anger you were filled with
when you first came to me melted away as you trained. It has become
strength of character and discipline. But it has left you isolated
and lonely. You deserve happiness.” Mori lifted her teacup, then
thought better of it and set it back down, placing her hands in her
lap. “Do you truly love him, Yumiko?”

Yumiko looked away as she felt the
heat rise to her cheeks. “I think so.”

Mori let out a deep breath. “That is
good to hear.”

“
Is it?” Yumiko asked
softly. “You aren’t…disappointed?” She chanced a look up at her
sensei to see a kind expression on Mori’s face.

“
Of course not, Yumiko,”
Mori replied, her lips trembling. “You’re like a daughter to me.
All I’ve ever wanted was your happiness.”

Yumiko felt her eyes filling with
tears and simply nodded, not trusting her voice. She had felt the
same about Mori, that she was like the mother she’d never really
had. She hoped she conveyed that with the look she gave Mori in
return.

Mori reached out and touched Yumiko’s
hand. “Yumiko, there’s something you need to know. I wanted to tell
you as soon as I returned from America.”

Yumiko looked at her expectantly, and
Mori seemed rather hesitant, which worried her. “What is
it?”

“
I didn’t go to America
just to confirm my suspicions of Brian. I went because of something
a colleague of mine sent my way.”

Yumiko frowned, wondering what she
could be alluding to.

“
Your mother, Yumiko. I’ve
had people searching for her since you came to me.”

“
My mother?” Yumiko sat up
straight, eyes wide. “What? You…found her?”

“
She’s in America,” Mori
confirmed. “She’s been there ever since she left.”

Her mother was alive and well! She
hadn’t been taken by yokai or killed outright after Yumiko had been
spirited away, as she’d feared all these years. She had fled to
America! Yumiko’s breath caught as she turned this over in her
mind. But why would her mother have left her? Why had she left
everything behind in a hurry to flee halfway around the world? The
revelation seemed to bring more questions than answers. She looked
up at Mori, and saw no smile lining her face, and suddenly Yumiko
dreaded what she was about to hear.

“
You’re sure it’s her?”
Yumiko asked softly.

“
Yes.”

Yumiko nodded and bit her lip. “Why
did she leave? Did you speak with her?”

Mori shook her head. “I didn’t have
to, Yumiko. I know why she left.”

Yumiko blinked, swallowing hard.
“Okay. Tell me.”

“
She fled Japan to keep her
daughter safe.”

Yumiko let out a deep breath. She
didn’t know what she’d been expecting, but she’d been filled with
tension at the answer. “I am safe,” she said, smiling. “I think…”
She let the thought fade at the dark look on Mori’s face. She
looked sad, defeated. “Sensei?”

Mori took a shuddering
breath and looked Yumiko in the eyes. “Her daughter was with her,
Yumiko.
You
were
with her.”

Yumiko froze. “I don’t
understand.”

“
You’re a reflection of
that girl, Yumiko,” Mori said, looking away. “You always have
been.” She swallowed hard. “You are a yokai.”

Chapter
Twenty-One

Her mother disappeared without a
trace, out of fear for the life of her daughter.

Her organs were on the wrong side of
her body.

She could see yokai and command
mirrors.

Of
course
she was a yokai. She hadn’t
merely been touched by the supernatural world. She
was
supernatural. Why had
she imagined herself the exception all of these years? Because
she’d escaped a yokai king and lived to tell about it? Because
she’d had a purpose to her life, a drive to survive?

Her mind whirled.

One day
,
a human girl will appear, one with a
brave soul and keen mind, and a will so radiant that she will melt
the heart of a yokai king. It is in her image that humans will be
represented.

She was the image in the
prophecy. The
image
, but not the girl. She
represented
humanity, but wasn’t
human. Yumiko frowned. Of course. She’d lived alongside humans her
entire life. She was living proof that humans and yokai could
co-exist. And if she married Kagami, she was also proof that yokai
could live in both worlds.

“
Yumiko?” Mori said,
softly.

Yumiko looked up.

“
Are you alright?” Mori
asked. She frowned at her choice of words. “Of course you’re not.
That was quite a-“

“
I’m fine,” Yumiko
interrupted her. “It makes sense. Everything makes a certain amount
of sense now.” She stood up, and Mori followed suit, looking
concerned.

“
Yumiko,” Mori shook her
head. “You can’t pretend that you didn’t just have your world
turned upside-down.”

“
That’s been happening a
lot lately. Maybe I’m learning to roll with it.” Yumiko crossed her
arms. “I remember things, you know. I remember what it was like
when I grew up with my mother.”

“
You retained her memories
when you were made in her image,” Mori nodded. “That’s why you were
so confused.”

“
See what sort of a life
you can make for yourself out there.”

Of course, Kagami had assumed she
wouldn’t be able to build any sort of life for herself in the human
world. He hadn’t understood why she’d rejected him, when she was a
yokai herself. Why hadn’t he told her? Why had he let her believe
the lie?

“
You’re still Yumiko,” Mori
said, watching her. “You’re still like a daughter to
me.”

Yumiko stiffened at that, and looked
up at Madame Mori. She saw kindness in the woman’s eyes, affection
in her smile. Nothing had changed. She was right. Just because
truths that had been there all along had been revealed didn’t
change everything that had occurred over the past ten years. “And
you’re like a mother to me,” Yumiko told her, and managed a
smile.

She was glad that she had a
mission to take her mind off of things. If there was something she
was good at it, it was throwing herself into work, closing herself
off and focusing. It probably wasn’t the healthiest way to deal
with discovering that you were actually a monster and not a human
being, but Yumiko didn’t exactly have the luxury to rock herself on
the floor of a shower and cry for hours. And she wouldn’t if she
did. That wasn’t who she was. Maybe the other Yumiko, the one who
had fled with her mother, who’d grown up to live a normal life as a
normal human being had that luxury. Maybe that’s who
she
was. But it didn’t
matter. When Yumiko had been created in that girl’s image, she had
taken a different path. A harder path. Looking back, she doubted
she would find any remnants of that innocent girl left within her.
She might as well be a stranger, even if they had shared memories
once upon a time. Her mother was a stranger, if she could even call
her mother. It would be more appropriate to call the mirror she’d
sprung from her mother.