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Authors: Duane Dog Chapman

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BOOK: You Can Run but You Can't Hide
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get the bad guy as much as we did. I also knew I needed a Mexican

cop with me if the bust went down. Without one, taking Luster

would be illegal.

Howard was in constant contact with the FBI. Retired agents

were calling and faxing him for updates. The CIA was also watch-

ing our every move. Howard received e-mails detailing how they

could land a plane on the road outside Costa Custodio if we needed

them. I’m not surprised that both law enforcement agencies were

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Yo u Ca n R u n , b u t Yo u Ca n ’ t H i d e

gung ho in offering their help to make the grab. Experience told me

they’d take Luster and then rob me of the bounty and credit for the

capture. I was not interested in that scenario.

Once I was in Mexico, I realized Andrew Luster was such a huge

fish, he was slipping out of my hands. Howard was working with

the FBI and CIA, Min and Mona were working with local officials,

which meant my team was the redheaded stepchild.

I called Beth to talk it over. I assured her I believed Carrera was

Luster. Beth told me she believed her e-mail account had been

hacked into for information too. She thought it might have been

other bounty hunters looking for Luster, until John Walsh and

America’s Most Wanted
showed up in Puerto Vallarta. There was

no way they could have known where to look for Luster unless they

were privy to the same information we had. I felt we were losing

control over the hunt.

Another day went by, and still, no sign of Luster.

Despite the promise that Costa Custodio would be well-stocked

with food, there was barely anything to eat. Our bodies were weak-

ening from hunger. We were in the middle of a huge waiting game,

with nothing to do but hope Luster showed. I decided to take in

some sun. I don’t know how long I was sleeping, but I awoke to the

touch of Mona’s hand on my arm. I opened my eyes and saw she

was holding a needle.

“My God, honey. What the hell are you doing?” I had no idea

what was in the syringe.

“I want to give you a shot of Vitamin B . You look so tired. This

12

will help you stay strong.” Anyone holding a syringe is unnerving,

even your doctor. It made me really uncomfortable to see Mona

with one. Mona liked her drinks so I’m not sure she knew what she

was doing. Tim was sitting outside with me too. Jokingly, I told

him I’d take the shot if he did. Needless to say, we wouldn’t let her

near us with her needle.

By the end of the day, it was obvious Luster wasn’t coming. I

wanted Mona to call again, but we had to be careful not to scare

him away. This time I asked Howard if he could record the call on

camera. He loved the idea. In fact, he had a device that could cap-

ture sound from both sides of the conversation. He set it up. Mona

made the call.


Hola,
David. It’s Mona.”

Yo u Ca n R u n

253

“Mona! Hi!” David sounded pleasantly surprised to hear her

voice. Howard just about wet himself because he knew we were get-

ting this all on tape.

“I am so sorry for not coming today. I had some business in

Guadalajara.” To convince Luster he needed to come, Mona told

him someone else was looking at the property.

“That’s too bad,” she said. “We wanted to see you. Min has some

other properties to show you. Is there another day you’d like to

come by?”

“How about Sunday?” Mona said that would be fine.

Two more days of waiting. I was growing frustrated by the lack

of progress. I also knew the clock was ticking down on my promise

to deliver Luster in seven days.

After the call, Howard wanted to check the voice we recorded

against footage we had of Luster speaking in court. Fernando, our

soundman, set up the tape so we could play clips back to back. He

played the conversation over and over, comparing it to the film

footage. After several minutes, Fernando looked up.

“It’s a match. It’s definitely him.” For the first time since we ar-

rived in Mexico, I really believed we weren’t on some wild goose

chase. Howard was ecstatic. The guys and I needed this positive rein-

forcement to keep our spirits up. Doubt had been slowly seeping in.

The next morning, I asked Mona about the big river that ran

into the ocean behind the house. She told me it was an incredible

five-mile hike down the mountain, through the jungle, and into the

valley.

“Once you get there, it’s paradise. We keep a couple of kayaks

down there. Min and I use them all the time.” I thought it might be

fun to get out and do something with the guys. Later that day,

Mona insisted I take Boris, Leland, and Tim down the trail. She

was practically badgering us to go.

What the hell. It sounded like fun and it was definitely a good

way to fill the time waiting for Luster. We made the hike and found

a couple of two-man kayaks at the bottom of the trail. The water

was shallow, though, too shallow to get very far. Boris stuck his

paddle in the sand to see if it was firm enough to walk on. It sank.

“Quicksand!” he yelled.

We paddled like hell to get out of there. I never worked so hard

in my life. All of a sudden, I noticed the current begin to change.

254

Yo u Ca n R u n , b u t Yo u Ca n ’ t H i d e

Boris shouted to turn back. The water was so deep, it turned black.

I couldn’t see the bottom. I thought Boris and Tim were going to

get washed away because their kayak was spinning out of control.

I turned to Leland and said, “If we don’t make it up this stream,

we’re going to die, son. Row your brains out!”

We finally reached the water’s edge. We jumped out and stood

safely on the shore. Just as Boris stepped out of his kayak, a scor-

pion stung him on his ankle. He started screaming and running. I

didn’t see him until the next day. Boris wasn’t cut out for this kind

of adventure.

We struggled with those kayaks. Unusually so. I couldn’t figure

out what went wrong. Tim kept saying the kayaks were too heavy.

That night, Howard decided to throw in the towel. He felt Lus-

ter was on to us and would never show. In fact, he thought he might

even be playing with us. I didn’t want to admit it, but I sort of

agreed. Howard said he felt like he was in Vegas, gambling away his

life savings on a bad hand of poker. It was time to walk away from

the table. Howard pulled everyone out, but Jeff, our cameraman,

stayed.

Jeff came to me to see how certain I was about catching Luster.

He explained that his wife was pregnant. If he stayed, he was on his

own dime. I told him I was as sure as I am that bears crap in the

woods. That guy let his balls hang on his own dime to film the bust.

The next morning, Tim and I went back down the trail to check

those kayaks. We turned them over and discovered six little holes

had been drilled into the bottom. Those sons of bitches were filled

with water! Tim was beyond mad. His blood was boiling at the

thought that someone was trying to harm us. It took an hour to

calm him. Luster was supposed to come later that day. We were too

close to fuck it up now.

When we got back up to the house, Mona was her crazy self. She

was mumbling something about how much she hated cooking for

ten men. I was guessing she had started partying before everyone

else. We all calmed her down. She had to be brought back to earth.

I needed her to call Luster one last time.

“Honey, please call him to see if he’s coming.”

Mona got him on the phone, but she couldn’t stay focused. She

asked him when he was coming.

Yo u Ca n R u n

255

“I’m in Puerto Vallarta. Why do you need to know?” Luster was

obviously suspicious.

Mona got very flustered. She began to fumble her words.

I whispered, “Ask him if he can bring rolling papers when he

comes.”

She turned to me and said, “What?”

“Hang up. Damn it, Mona!” I couldn’t believe she showed our

hand. There was no way Luster didn’t hear her talking to me.

She began to cry. She blew it. Luster would never come to Costa

Custodio now. I tried to calm her down, but she couldn’t stop crying.

I finally went to bed, hoping tomorrow would bring better results.

C h a p t e r F o r t y - e i g h t

YOU CAN’T HIDE

The next mor ning,
I got up at seven o’clock, much earlier

than usual. Mona was nowhere to be found. When I confronted

Min, he said she bought a wig and had gone to Puerto Vallarta to

hunt Luster down herself. I just about shit.

That double-crossing bitch.

“Tim! Leland! Wake up! We’ve gotta go,
now
!” I told the boys

what was happening. Just then, Filiberto walked into the house. I

asked him if he was officially on duty. He said he was. I asked him

to go with Tim and Leland. They needed to get to Puerto Vallarta,

find Mona, and get her off the streets.

I sent the others ahead. Boris and I didn’t go. The hunter stayed

put. I didn’t want to get caught bounty hunting Mona in Mexico.

Luster was a fugitive, wanted by the United States government.

Mona was just a crazy, wild woman trying to double-cross me. It

was better to let the Mexican cop go after her.

Boris and I went out for a couple of beers while we waited to

hear from the boys. They were supposed to call when they made

contact with Mona. We sat in the bar for hours. At one point, a

couple of Mexicans walked in, stink-eyeing Boris and me. They

were two mean-looking Vatos. One guy was shorter than the other,

with a bushy mustache. The taller guy was as big as he was tall. His

belly hung over his giant scorpion belt buckle.

Yo u Ca n ’ t H i d e

257

The fat guy turned to me and said, “You gonna buy me a beer,

gringo?”

I stood up, looked him square in the eye, and said, “Say what?”

“I said, you gonna buy me a beer?”

I puffed up my chest and said, “You’re gonna shit and fall back

into it, José.”

“My name is not José.”

“I don’t give a rat’s ass what your name is, Esse. I ain’t no gringo,

I’m an Indian.”

Boris was shaking, thinking we were about to get our asses

kicked.

“Boris, relax. They ain’t gonna do nothing. They think I can

whoop their ass. Just shut up and act cool.”

The fat guy ordered double tacos and burritos and sent them

over to us.

“Courtesy of the man down the bar, Perro.” Food is always a

good way to get in good with the locals. I drank two Coronas, try-

ing to make the best of our wait.

And then I got a call that would change the course of my life

forever.

“Perro. It’s Filiberto. I seen him. Luster.”

I couldn’t believe what I was hearing.


Sí.
Min showed up and found Mona. Mona was cruising with

her stepdaughter, Gina.” Gina lived in Puerto Vallarta. She knew

the bar scene. They were out looking for Luster when the boys

caught up with them.

I looked at Boris and said, “We’ve got to go.” We jumped in our

rented black SUV and made the two-hour drive in less than sixty

minutes. Boris was literally on the floorboard lying in fetal position

and screaming the entire drive.

I called Leland to ask if he thought it was Luster they saw.

“One hundred and ten percent, Dad.” My heart was racing as

fast as we were driving. When Leland said that, I knew we had him.

By the time I got to Puerto Vallarta, the team had spotted and

lost Luster a couple of times. When I connected with Leland and

Tim, they pointed to a bar across the street.

“He’s in that bar, right there.” Leland pointed with his forefinger.

I sent Tim inside to see if it was Luster. He came back and told me

258

Yo u Ca n R u n , b u t Yo u Ca n ’ t H i d e

he looked like a troll under a bridge as he walked around looking in

women’s drinks to see if he could find another potential victim.

Just then, Leland spotted him walking out of the bar and onto

the crowded street. I focused in on three or four large guys with

bandanas around their heads surrounding a very tall American.

It couldn’t see his face. Tim and Leland caught a glimpse, though.

They knew it was Luster. He was flanked by his bodyguards and had

apparently changed his shirt from the one he was wearing when Le-

land saw him go into the bar. He must have sensed we were getting

close.

Much to my surprise, Luster stepped out of his protective cir-

cle. I needed to distract the bodyguards so I could keep Luster

alone. I saw a couple of pretty hookers standing on the corner next

to me.

“Come here, baby.” I motioned them over. “I’ll give you twenty

bucks if you take your shirts off and walk by those guys over there.”

Apparently, the girls didn’t quite get what I asked them to do. In-

stead of walking past the goons, they walked right up to them,

stopped, and started talking to them. Dumb-ass hos! It didn’t work.

The guys talked to them for a few minutes, and then they moved

BOOK: You Can Run but You Can't Hide
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