Young Annabelle Series: Young Annabelle, the Truth About James, What My Heart Wants (47 page)

“Ten dollars for thirty throws.” He smiled, eyeing me. “Don’t see many girls wanting to play.”

“Is it hard?” I asked, gulping as I eyed the next cage which had the balls flying out like crazy.

“I’ll put it at a low speed for you.” He smiled again. “A beginner level.”

I nodded. “Okay.”

I went inside, put on the helmet and the attendant, which I found out his name was Greg, showed me how to swing the bat. The first time the ball flew at me, I squealed out of the way. After the last ball flew and I missed it like all the other ones, I heard Greg laughing behind me.

“It’s not funny.” I squealed, turning to scowl at him, but stopped with the bat stumbling out of my hands as I saw familiar blue eyes, grasping the fence and eyeing me deathly.

“Dean?” I murmured, transfixed. I pulled off the helmet and Greg entered the cage.

“You want to go again?” Greg asked as I handed him the helmet and bat.

I shook my head. “It was fun, maybe another time.”

“Let’s hope so.” He smiled at me and placed the bat and helmet down. He glanced in Dean’s direction and back at me. “Is that your boyfriend? He seems kinda pissed.”

I shook my head again and murmured. “No.”

I stepped out of the batting cage and Dean pushed off the fence, crossing his arms over his chest. “What are you doing here?”

I smiled timidly. “To hit some baseballs.”

“I don’t want to talk to you.” He said, bitterly. “Didn’t you get that by the way I didn’t answer your text.”

“I got that.” I stammered.

“Everything okay there?” Greg asked from behind us.

I nodded, facing him. “Yeah, everything’s cool.”

Greg nodded and turned to attend another customer.

Dean smirked, shaking his head. “Already got another fool lined up, Anna? Damn, you work fast.”

My eyes widened. “What are you talking about?”

“You pretend to be so innocent, but you’re not. You know exactly what you’re doing.” Dean sneered. “You played me.”

“I didn’t.” I murmured, not wanting to make a scene, even though I felt myself go ‘there’ again with his mean accusations. I did not want to cry here.

“You did.” He murmured back. “I’ve been going crazy these last few weeks. All I did was think about you and how much I’d screwed up on our date. All this time you were playing with that asshole James guy. You should have said something.”

“He wasn’t my boyfriend when you met me.” I explained. “I barely knew you and he was always there.”

“Right,” He grimaced, smoothing his hair back nervously. “Anyways, I don’t care anymore. It’s better like this.”

“I’m sorry.” I murmured. “I never meant to hurt you.”

“Yeah, well, it is what it is.” He eyed me sternly. I didn’t know what else to say.

“I’m sorry,” I murmured to him after a few more seconds of silence.

“I can’t believe you actually like that asshole.” Dean exclaimed.

“I don’t anymore.” I exhaled and started again. “Dean, we go to different schools. And you never called after our first date. James was there to pick up the pieces.”

Dean snorted. “You chose him over me! There really might be something wrong with you.”

I jerked back. “Excuse me?”

“What’s going on here?” A familiar voice, the horn dog from the bathroom called out from behind us. We turned simultaneously and the two girls he was hanging out with were approaching us with Joe running to catch up, giving a cringing look to Dean.

“Well?” Denise demanded, eyeing me deathly. I eyed Raina, a blonde with blue eyes, who was actually very cute close up. She looked confused.

“Ladies,” Joe exclaimed, breathily. “Let’s get back to the group. My boy here is trying to have a conversation.”

They nodded, well Raina nodded and grabbed a reluctant to leave Denise. Denise narrowed her eyes at me as Raina dragged her away. I think she was trying to make me feel like I was doing something wrong. I wasn’t doing anything wrong. Dean wasn’t official with her girl just yet, if this was even their first date. There was a whole group of them.

Bitch Annabelle was coming out.

“Hey Anna, is Jenna here too?” Joe asked once the girls were out of ear shot.

I shook my head. “No, she’s at her friend’s house.”

Joe took a deep breath. “We’re not out on a date with those girls, it’s a group thing.”

“You can do whatever you want Joe, you don’t have a girlfriend.” I told him.

“Did you tell Jenna you saw us tonight?” Joe gulped.

I nodded. “Yeah, but I just said you guys were out in a group.”

“Was she mad?” Joe asked.

“No.” I lied.

Joe looked relieved. “Cool, alright, I’m heading back.”

Joe jogged back and I faced Dean again, who seemed perplexed. “So you saw us before?”

I nodded. “Yeah, but I had no intentions of bothering you. I was going to leave you alone.”

“Were you?” He narrowed his eyes at me.

“Yeah,” I murmured. “I heard those girls in the bathroom. The one named Raina, she’s crazy about you.”

Silence.

“You should totally go out with her, she’s really cute.” I said.

“You’re really cute,” Dean murmured, eyeing my entire body. “You went to school like that?”

“Yeah,” I answered, slowly.

“Was it for him?” Dean asked.

“It was for me.” I answered.

Silence as he stared at me, perplexed.

After what seemed like forever, Dean mumbled. “Goodbye Annabelle.” He turned, without another glance and headed towards his group.

“Goodbye Dean.” I murmured even though he couldn’t hear me anymore.

Well that story was officially finished.

Dean I hope you find a good girl, one who’ll treat you the way you deserve to be treated. 

“Hey cutie!” A familiar voice called from behind. I turned, facing a grinning Greg. “You wanna hit some more baseballs, get some aggression out. This one’s on me.”

I smiled back and headed towards the cage as he stood behind it, grabbing at it. “Okay.”

*~*~*

Twenty nine shooting baseballs later, I had yet to hit one.

“Okay last one,” Greg informed as I held the bat into position again. “Keep your eye on the ball, don’t lose focus, even for a second.”

“I’m going to hit it this time,” I stated, determined as I gripped the handle firmer. “I got this.”

“I hope so,” I heard Greg mutter. He wasn’t a believer. Well I’d show him.

Three.

Two.

One.

The baseball shot out like a cannon, and I focused with everything I had. I swung the bat and hit the ball.

I HIT THE BALL!

The bat fell from my hands as I turned facing a flabbergasted Greg. “I did it!”

“You did it babe!” Greg rejoiced, hollering with enthusiasm. “On the last one, you pulled through.”

Wait a minute, did he just call me babe?
I shook it off and took the helmet off, handing it back to Greg. “Thanks. Your teaching skills finally pulled through.”

His jaw dropped for a second before he snapped it close. “Babe, you trying to say something? You got it in the end, didn’t you?” He smirked. “I’m a great teacher by the way.”

“You are.” I smiled back. “I probably wouldn’t have hit the last one without you telling me to focus. I’ve been all over the place today.” 

He was really cute.

He smiled at me and I got out of the way as the next customer took their turn. I pulled my backpack on and checked my phone. There was a text from Jenna, but before I could read it, I felt Greg’s presence next to me.

He looked serious as I glanced up at him. “You really not going out with that guy from before?”

I shook my head. “No,”

“He’s been staring this way for the last ten minutes.” Greg informed, and I held myself from reacting. Dean was staring this way for the last ten minutes? He was supposed to be moving on with Raina.

“Really?” I searched the area and found Dean hanging out with his group at the same batting cage. He wasn’t staring this way. He was busy talking to Raina about something, looking serious.

“Yeah,” Greg answered. “That girl noticed he was staring over here and got into his face.”

“The girl he’s talking to now.” I asked.

Greg shook his head. “No, another one. I think it was her friend. Anyways, that chick made a scene for a few seconds before the other guy pulled her away.”

“His name is Joe, and the guy you said was staring at me, his name is Dean.” I explained.

“Like I care,” Joe smirked. “They obviously don’t know how to handle their chicks. These guys don’t know anything about going out with a girl.”

“They’re not out on a date, it’s a group thing.” I informed.

“I don’t believe that, those chicks have been hanging off those two pussies for the last hour.” Greg sneered. “You should have seen the looks on their faces when they noticed Dean talking with you. It was actually kind of funny the way they ran over. Like they thought you were going to steal him away.”

“I wasn’t, we were just talking.” I stated, horrified of the way it had looked. I didn’t want to ruin this for Dean, he deserved to move on.

“I hope you guys were just talking.” Greg grinned, eyeing me in a flirty way. “In my eyes, he’s screwed up big time.”

“What do you mean?” I asked.

“He’s obviously into you but is too chicken shit or weak to do anything about it. He gave up, even though he clearly doesn’t want to by the way he’s been eye stalking you since leaving. He and his friend are pussies.”

Why do people keep calling them that? James called them pussies too.

Or maybe……were they?

Maybe I really didn’t do anything wrong. In fact, I’m a little pissed that he’d made me feel guilty about moving on with James. If he had wanted me, he should have done something about it.

But he didn’t.

He never called.

He never reached out.

And I’m the bad one for not waiting for him.

I don’t think so.

At least James was persistent….

DON’T GO THERE!

“Maybe you’re right.” I murmured to Greg. “He didn’t try.”

Greg took a step closer to me, looking serious. “I’d try.”

I blinked repeatedly, feeling my face heat up at his declaration. “You don’t know what you’re saying.”

“Oh but I do,” He smirked. “I’m no pussy. If I see something I like, I don’t
wait around for the
perfect
moment to make things happen.”

“You’re nice,” I murmured to him.

“No, I’m not.” He said seriously. “I just don’t play around.”

“I just got out of a messy relationship,” I told him, which made him confused.

“You just got out of a relationship? With that Dean guy?” Greg asked, bewilderedly.

“No, with a guy from my school.” I shook my head. “It’s complicated.”

“I bet it is,” Greg stated, taking a step back, eyeing his cages. “I gotta get back to work.”

“Okay, um, well thanks for helping in the cage.” I said, turning to walk away.

“Anna,” Greg called me from behind. I turned, facing him. “When it gets uncomplicated, come back and find me.”

I smiled at him and nodded, then walked away.

With my track record, it didn’t look like anything would become uncomplicated anytime soon.

Not where James was concerned.

I glanced around before entering back inside the arcade, quickly finding Dean staring my way. I smiled and waved at him. He waved back, and in an instant Denise and Raina were at his side, pointing my way. He looked exhausted as he peeled his eyes away from me to face them. I laughed and entered the arcade.

Good luck Dean!

CHAPTER
37

I realized I forgot about Jenna’s text as I was coming off the bus at my stop. I opened her text as I walked the rest of the way home.

Jenna:
Problem Alert! That traitor actually had the balls to put up a video about their little lake trip last weekend. It’s not good. It shows a few things Roy didn’t explain to Dana. She’s really upset.

Annabelle:
I’ll watch it when I get home. Is she okay?

Jenna:
No, but she will be soon enough. Give me another hour and I’ll have her hating him with a passion of a million suns. How was the Dean situation?

Annabelle:
Dean who? He’s gone with the wind now. It’s all good.

Jenna:
Was Joe really with another girl?

Annabelle:
He said it wasn’t a date and that they were all there as a group. There was a girl named Denise there, and she’s crazy about him. She wants him to be her boyfriend. But he kept asking about you.

Jenna:
Really? That’s interesting. Anyways, I’m off to console Dana for the millionth time. All the girls from the team came over again. I’m helping her mom make hot chocolate for everyone in the kitchen. See you tomorrow.

Annabelle:
Good luck.

I arrived home ten minutes later. It was almost 8:30pm.

I was little late.

Okay… a lot.

“Anna, is that you?” Mom called from the kitchen. Before I could answer, she came out of the kitchen with a dish towel in hand. “What happened?”

I slid off my flip flops. “It was really busy at the club tonight and they asked me to stay an extra hour and half. And then I had to wait for the bus to come.”

Mom’s forehead creased. “Why didn’t you call? We would have picked you up.”

She knew why. This was the way she’d programmed me to behave regarding asking for rides to and from anywhere for the last five months.

“I’m not used to that being an option. I forgot I could now.” I explained and she slowly cringed processing my response.

After a brief moment of silence, she exhaled. “It should have always been an option.” She stated softly, sounding regretful. “From now on, it’s a definite option. Anytime, anyplace you need a ride, just call me or your father.”

I nodded.

“You missed dinner. I’ll warm up a plate for you and set it on the table. Your father and I are going to be downstairs working on some paperwork. So we’ll be down there for a while.” Mom informed, entering the kitchen.

I went up to my room and turned on my laptop. I peeled off my school clothes, feeling like I could breathe again since they’d been sticky from the humidity for a while. I changed into my pajamas and opened my Facebook page, finding Latisha’s page and clicking on the two minute video on her timeline. The video of their weekend away was exactly how I’d imagined it to be. It was taken at night and the popular group was huddled around a fire pit, laughing loudly and enjoying each other’s company with the aid of red plastic cups.

Meaning, they were drunk or in the process of getting drunk.  Then all of a sudden somebody dared Latisha to kiss Roy. The kiss happened just as Roy described it to be. Latisha had latched onto him tightly all of a sudden. It also showed him trying to pull back. He laughed her off and sat back down. Then out of nowhere Latisha jumped onto him, straddling him and kissing him passionately. His hands gripped her shoulders, seeming like they were trying to pull her back. Everyone around howled excitedly and after a few more seconds Latisha jumped off. She sashayed back to her screaming hot girls as if she were a sexy vixen, leaving Roy dumbfounded. He eyed his boys and shook his head like he found the whole thing annoying.

I was confused.

Jenna said that Dana was upset after watching this video. But in my opinion, he didn’t do anything wrong. In fact, it looked like he didn’t like the kiss at all. And wasn’t he single at the time too? He could do whatever he wanted being a free man and all. Did Dana really have a right to be upset?

Did I have a right to be upset with James? I wasn’t so sure anymore. I shook it off, it didn’t matter anymore what I thought or didn’t.

The video had thirty seconds left to it and I was about to turn it off, but stopped when I spotted James on the other side of the fire pit talking with Tom and Peter. The flames of the pit went down a bit, revealing Donna rubbing herself against James, who was barely paying any attention to her. He was ignoring her.

He was ignoring her?

Why?

She was rubbing herself against him, making it obvious what she wanted. And he wasn’t giving it to her. Not even an inch. The video quality was amazing because it showed James giving Peter an exasperated look, jerking his chin at Donna while cringing.

Cringing at Donna?

How?

Why?

The last few seconds of the video revealed more. Now annoyed, James shrugged Donna off completely, resulting in her jerking back in shock. Her expression made it seem like she couldn’t believe she was being blown off, especially when she practically offered herself on a silver platter to him.

And he didn’t want it.

At the end of the video, she stalked away angrily, joining her hot girls. James didn’t look like he cared and continued laughing with the guys.

He didn’t care at all about how she felt.

He didn’t care that he blew her off and made her mad.

He was being honest when he said he didn’t like her like that.

What the hell was going on? Nothing was making sense anymore.

All of a sudden, against the advisement of my brain, my common sense….my heart started thumping rapidly.

No….stop it.

Stop feeling…..

He still humiliated me on Monday and Tuesday.

I closed the web browser and headed downstairs to eat my dinner, even though I wasn’t hungry anymore. It was weird that I wasn’t hungry, I hadn’t eaten anything since lunch time except for half a cup of lemonade at work after the heat of the night became too much. My plate of food was all by itself on the bare kitchen table. Tonight’s dinner was spaghetti and meatballs.

My favorite.

It was bitter sweet. I wasn’t hungry, but it was my favorite meal in the entire world. I wanted to feel hungry again. I haven’t felt hunger pains for a while now and I knew exactly why. It’s this damn heartache. It masked the pain of hunger as its own, making me think of James instantly whenever my body felt uncomfortable.

This was not good. I needed to eat more. This morning I’d gone on the scale again and I was down a few pounds from last week. I was 145 lbs. Last week I was 148lbs.

Was I really losing the weight too fast?

I glanced down at the amount of food mom gave me and my instant reaction was that it was too much. If I was given this much food last week, I would have taken half of it off immediately and mom would have approved.

But not today.

Today I declared to mom that I’d eat more moderately and push any notions of dieting to the side.

But could I really do that?

The effects of the diet weren’t all bad considering my body had changed dramatically from the start of the year. I wasn’t the same old Annabelle, and even though I was still heartbroken and bitter about how things were now, I liked how I looked. I liked it a lot when I entered school today and the boys were staring at me with new eyes. It was like I was something special. And if I was being a hundred percent honest, I secretly loved it when James couldn’t take his eyes off of me.

And if I was a million percent honest, I loved it when he called me his girl in front of everyone.

Not that I’d ever admit that. 

We were (gulp)….finished.

Finished….

I ate my spaghetti and meatballs, finishing seventy five percent of the plate. I was actually full so I didn’t count it as cheating on my declaration. After cleaning my plate, I went back to my room and completed my homework. At 11pm, I turned off the lights and tucked myself into bed. I stared at my ceiling and without realizing it I began to fade into a fantasy.

“Are you crazy about me?” I whispered, staring deep into his eyes. He lowered and pressed his lips on to me.
He let go and pulled back without answering. But I knew what the answer was without him saying it. 

“You know,” I sighed, leaning my head back against James’s leather interior. “We’re messed up. We’re not normal.”

James chuckled. “You’re telling me.”

“I should have gotten some answer
s from you.” I whispered to him. He nodded, grimacing.

“I know,” Jam
es murmured. “There are answers. They’re just not very good ones.”

“Are you crazy about me?” I whispered, looking at him.

He nodded slowly. “More than you’ll ever know.”

“Did you hook up with Donna last weekend?” I asked him.

He shook his head. “She wanted to, a lot of times. But I blew her off.”

I sighed. “Do you want to be with me?” I asked him and he quickly nodded.

“More than you’ll ever know.” He answered, quietly. “I love you.”

“I hope so
too, because I love you.” I got out of the car and stood, facing him. “More than you’ll ever know.”

Without another glance, I closed the door and……

Snap out of it!

Please Annabelle!

You have to stay strong….You can’t go there….he went too far this week.

“I know,” I whispered to my ceiling. “But I wish I didn’t have to.”