Young May Moon (17 page)

‘M
Y DEAR
M
AY
, you don’t look as if you have been on holiday at all!’ Tatiana greeted her on her return to work. She cupped May’s face with her two small hands. ‘Your complexion is pale under the peaches! Dark smudges under your eyes. What is wrong? Will you tell me?’

‘I was sick first thing this morning,’ May said.

‘You are recovered now, yes? If not, I shall insist you go home.’

‘Tatiana, I might as well say, before it becomes obvious – I am pregnant. I won’t blame you if you feel you must dismiss me but, well, I need to carry on working for as long as I can.’

Tatiana’s eyes flashed. ‘Who is responsible for this?’

‘I imagine you can guess.
He
is not to know. Henry has asked me to marry him.’

‘Have you agreed?’

‘Yes, for the baby’s sake. It will need a father.’

‘What about
you
? D’you feel you need a husband?’

‘He is the only one I would consider. My mother said she would look after me, but I’m afraid she never did in the past, although I have forgiven her for it.’

‘Your mother – she will be looking for employment? I know she is a flamenco dancer, from Andalucia, and an idea occurred to me. Tell me what you think. I have a good friend, a fellow émigré, we were at school here together. She became a ballerina, while I, as you know, studied in my art. Evgenia has a dance studio near here, and many pupils: rich young ladies, some with talent, some not so much, but all enjoying the experience. The dances taught are various, some modern, ballroom, also rhumba, samba and tango. My friend mentioned she wished to add flamenco to her list. Can I recommend your mother to her?’

‘I must ask her first, but I believe she would seize such an
opportunity
,’ May exclaimed.

‘If she is interested, bring her to see me. I think, am I right? that you do not wish for too much attention at the moment, and that if she has an occupation, you would both be happy.’

‘Oh, Tatiana, that’s
exactly
how I feel! Now, would you like me to start with the correspondence? I want to go on working for as long as possible.’

‘Even after you marry?’

‘Yes! I can’t sit brooding at home all day.’

‘I must dye my hair before I meet your Tatiana and her friend!’ was Carmen’s reaction later. ‘You were my only pupil in the flamenco, May, and though you have disappointed me in not continuing to dance, I succeeded with you. Pomona, help me with my hair, eh? Yes, now!’

They disappeared up the stairs to the bathroom, while Henry, who’d just arrived home, stood in the hall to be greeted with an unexpected hug by May. ‘They’ll be shut in the bathroom for hours, Henry. Mum is about to restore her raven locks! Don’t you dare comment, unless you want to compliment her on the result. I’ll put you in the picture before she reappears.’

‘How did your day go?’ he asked.

‘Very well, Henry. I told Tatiana; I felt it was only fair, and she was supportive. I am fortunate to have such a good employer.’

‘I heard from Selina while you were away,’ he said, as they relaxed in the sitting room before dinner. ‘We, you, Pom and myself, are invited to young William’s baptism next Sunday. I thought you would still be away, and of course, Selina was not aware that Carmen would be here, so I said it would just be Pom and me.’

‘I think you should keep it like that. I – I don’t feel I could go – hold the new baby. He’ll be passed around for cuddles. And Danny will likely be there with Bea. I’ve just realized, though, that Pom is due to return to Cambridge around then.’

‘That’s all arranged, too. Terence will be there for the weekend, and he suggested that he could take her back there with him, on his motorbike. I can see you are alarmed at the thought, but I assure
you, he is much more mature than he was! Pom jumped at the chance of riding pillion.’

‘I’m sure she did! I have to keep reminding myself she’s an adult now, and I must stop treating her like a child.’

‘By the way, Pom doesn’t appear to know about your condition. Your mother is more discreet than you think, and I gather you’ve not told either of them yet about our plans to marry?’

‘I’d rather not say about that, until I’ve seen a doctor,’ said May. ‘Please don’t mention it to your family yet either. It’s William’s big day, after all.’

‘I’m laying the table,’ Pomona called out from the kitchen. ‘Mum’s coming down, but she’s concealed her wet hair under a turban.’

‘Definitely no comment then,’ May said wryly to Henry.

Bea was disappointed not to see May at her nephew’s baptism. ‘You know your mother would have been welcome to come, too,’ she told Pomona.

‘There wouldn’t have been room in the car, with my luggage. I hope Terence has empty panniers on his bike to put all my things in.’ She had been secretly pleased to have Henry to herself on the journey to Kettle Row.

As godmother, Bea held William with some trepidation. She appealed to Danny: ‘Wouldn’t you like to take him for a bit?’

‘I’d rather not. Anyway, I’m not his godfather, and
he
moved away when he saw, as I did, the baby’s face go red and an ominous sound from his nether region. Don’t forget I had some experience of
that
with Cluny when she was younger.’

‘Where’s Selina? I’m wearing my best costume; I don’t want it leaked over!’

‘Look on it as a practice run for when we—’

‘You want a family, then?’

‘Of course. Don’t you?’

‘I hadn’t really thought about it,’ Bea said. ‘May’s the same. We never drooled over babies in prams when we were girls.’ She
relinquished
the whiffy William, with some relief, to his doting father.

Pomona and Terence slipped outside to admire the motorbike. She sat astride the saddle, ‘to get the feel of it,’ as she said.

‘I hope you’re not going to wear a skirt tomorrow,’ he observed, ‘or a silly hat.’

‘Why do you always lecture me?’ she demanded crossly. ‘I shall be wearing slacks and my old school shoes – and your father’s ancient tweed cap, so there!’

‘I’ve some spare goggles and gauntlet gloves for you.’ He sighed ruefully, as she dismounted without his help. ‘I’m sorry, Pom, it’s become a habit to snipe at each other, hasn’t it? Can’t we call a truce? I actually approve of your saucy hat, though I reckon it’s too small to stay on your head on a windy day.’

They were facing one another in the shed in which the bike was housed, along with garden spades and forks, a bucket or two, a few empty terracotta pots and a bale of straw.

Terence took off his glasses and rubbed them with a clean
handkerchief
. When he looked up Pomona took in, with a start, the luminosity of his long-lashed blue eyes, which were usually hidden by his spectacles.

‘Why don’t we kiss and make up?’ he suggested.

‘Why not?’ She took his glasses from his hand. ‘It might be easier if you can’t see it’s
me
.’

When they went back indoors, to witness the cutting of the
christening
cake, with William in a clean romper suit, Henry was not the only one to notice the odd piece of straw clinging to their clothes. Maybe, he mused, Terence had been the right one for Pomona all along.

Terence and Pomona left for Cambridge the following morning.

‘Hug me tight round the waist,’ he instructed, as she climbed on to the pillion, while he held the bike steady, and she didn’t object at all.

It was a typical April day: sunshine and showers. They sped along country lanes, whizzing past livestock in farm fields: leaping lambs, and grazing sheep and cattle. Being a Monday, washing blew on lines fixed between two trees in cottage gardens and in a school
playground
they glimpsed youngsters dancing in a circle and chanting, ‘Farmer’s in his den.’

At lunchtime, before they reached the outskirts of the city, they stopped by the river for lunch. Emma had packed egg-and-cress
sandwiches and two pieces of the rich fruitcake, complete with icing. They glimpsed a flotilla of moorhens on the water, who disappeared in the reeds, and were glad of their protective clothing as they were constantly flailing their hands at flies and stinging insects.

‘This is fun,’ Terence observed without irony. ‘We ought to meet up now and again – hire a punt perhaps. What d’you think?’

‘I think,’ said Pomona, ‘your girlfriend might not approve!’

‘My girlfriend? Oh, she’s hardly that. She’s someone I work with. In fact, she’s been overseeing me – she’s already qualified. I only mentioned her at Christmas to rile you.’

‘To make me jealous?’ she suggested.

‘You could say that. I suddenly realized you were a beautiful young woman, and I was overawed. It wasn’t that I didn’t want to ask you out, it’s more that you seemed superior, being at the
university
—’

‘You could have been too,’ she pointed out.

‘I’m not sure I would have made the grade, like you. Anyway, I prefer to learn on the job. You need to be intelligent to work for my company, I’m told, so it’s not a lesser option.’

‘You made me think you didn’t want me as a friend any more.’

‘We were forever arguing – remember?’

‘Yes, but I always secretly
liked
you,’ she admitted.

‘As I did you, Pom. Actually, I thought you were more interested in old Henry.’

‘Oh, that was just a crush – he’s far too old for me,’ she said.

‘Well then, it seems it’s just you and me.’

‘It always was.’

Evgenia said: ‘I would like to offer you the position: it would mean working afternoons and evenings, but I imagine you are used to that?’

‘Yes, the hours would suit me,’ Carmen agreed. ‘However I would expect to be provided with a taxi home at night, I don’t care for the tube.’

‘That could be arranged.’ Evgenia looked Carmen up and down with a keen eye. ‘You are a little overweight….’

‘It will disappear when I am dancing every day again,’ Carmen
said confidently. It was a good thing, she thought, that Evgenia didn’t ask my age, though I suppose we are probably both around fifty, so I’m glad I dyed my hair.

‘When can you start?’

‘As soon as you like,’ Carmen said, as they shook hands.

That evening May was told the good news. She thought it better not to remind her mother that she had promised to take care of her during her pregnancy. She had really not believed it would happen.

‘I shall be able to lie in, in the mornings,’ Carmen said, with
satisfaction
.

When May related that to Henry, he smiled wryly and said: ‘At least we will be able to get into the bathroom first thing now, eh? Also, it will give us the chance to discuss future plans in the evening.’

May wasn’t so sure about that. She felt she was in denial about the baby, it didn’t seem real. As for wedding plans, she wasn’t ready for all that, just yet.

M
AY FACED THE
doctor over his desk when the examination was over. The nurse who had been present gave her a reassuring smile before she left the room.

The doctor regarded May for a moment, noting her hands tightly clenched in her lap. ‘I confirm that you are pregnant …’ he paused, ‘Miss Jolley. From your dates, and the examination, I calculate that you can expect to produce your baby in the first week of November. However, it might be wise to keep this news to yourself until the third month. There is a slight chance of miscarrying before that stage – not, I must say, that I have any reason to think this could happen in your case, but I would advise you to take things easy for the next fortnight or so. I’m afraid I cannot give you anything for the nausea, but I assure you that that, too, will pass. I will see you again in two months’ time, unless anything untoward should happen.’ He rose, held out his hand. ‘You will, I presume, be thinking by then of booking the nursing home. I do not recommend a home birth in your … um … situation.’

‘Thank you, Doctor,’ May managed.
Nursing home
, I hadn’t thought of that. November … cold, dreary weather. I was fortunate to be born in the spring.

‘How did you get on?’ Tatiana asked anxiously when she returned to work. ‘What did the doctor say?’

‘That everything was all right – I think, but the doctor had very cold hands.’ May shuddered at the memory. It had been rather an ordeal. She forced a smile, added brightly, ‘Now, where is the list you wanted me to type?’

That evening, after dinner, she tried to delay the moment when Henry would surely put the same question. Instead, he asked:
‘Would you care to come to church with me this Sunday? I’d be at the organ, of course, but you might like to sit next to the vicar’s wife, she’s not so much older than you, but she already has three children.’

She guessed the reason behind the invitation. ‘You want us to talk to the vicar afterwards?’

‘Yes. I thought we agreed that when you had things confirmed we should take that first step.’

‘Henry, could we wait until I feel better? The doctor tells me I will, in a little while.’

‘You haven’t changed your mind? Don’t keep it from me, if you have. I want you to stay here so I can care for you. It’s obvious Carmen has discarded her good intentions.’

‘She’s enjoying her dancing again. I don’t mind, because she’s happy. She mentioned a new friend, Ramon, who teaches
Latin-American
steps, who has a spare room in his flat, within walking distance of the studio. She might well take him up on his offer.’

‘I hope it’s … well, a
genuine
offer.’

‘Henry, my mother has always done what she wanted to do. I was hurt by her desertion of us when I a child, but I now accept her as she is. She’s a survivor, after all.’

‘So long as
you
don’t leave me,’ he said softly.

‘I can promise that. I will accompany you to church, I haven’t heard you play since the
Singing Kettle
days.’

The doctor was right, May felt better by the time she was three months pregnant. She was also relieved, thinking the danger of losing the baby was much less. She let out the waistband of her office skirts, and looked at herself side on in the long mirror in the bedroom. She had lost weight as a result of the sickness, and there wasn’t much in the way of a baby bump for anyone to see, or so she convinced herself.

The postman arrived one morning just as she and Henry were leaving for work. He greeted them cheerily: ‘Just two for Miss Jolley today, no bills!’ May tucked the envelopes in her bag; there was no time to stop and read these now.

She didn’t remember the letters until lunchtime. She and Tatiana had been busy tidying and rearranging the ceramics before a prospective buyer arrived at eleven. The client, an old friend of
Tatiana’s, insisted on taking her friend out to a smart new restaurant.

‘I’ll hold the fort; don’t hurry back,’ May told Tatiana.

‘Break for lunch as usual, ignore the telephone,’ Tatiana advised.

The first letter May opened was from Pomona, telling her she had joined the rowing club.

May smoothed out the enclosed newspaper cutting and read the headline:

‘Fame at last, Pomona! Even if you haven’t got there yet,’ she said aloud. ‘Well, you made the local paper, anyway.’ She was pleased at the mention of Terence; the two of them obviously shared the same sense of humour, she thought.

She recognized the writing on the second envelope too, and her heart missed a beat. The letter was from Paddy. There was a drawing in crayon. It was recognizable as Toby, due to the dark circles round the eyes, and the perked ears. On impulse, she kissed the picture. Paddy wrote:

Friendship, warmest regards; he’s letting me know where he stands, she thought. She would discuss it with Henry.

‘Maybe you would care to come too?’ she suggested to him.

He hesitated. ‘Are you sure that’s a good idea?’

‘Your moral support, that’s important, Henry. He won’t ask too many questions, I feel, if you are with me.’

‘He might suspect you are pregnant.’

‘If I say
we
are engaged….’

He hoped she wouldn’t observe the anguish in his eyes. ‘Then I think it is time we went shopping for a ring, don’t you?’ he said.

‘Nothing too expensive,’ May insisted. ‘Not modern, I don’t mind a second-hand ring – Victorian, perhaps?’

The jeweller produced a tray of modest rings. Henry gave a small sigh. He’d been thinking of an engagement ring, but he wanted May to be happy with her choice. She picked out a slender gold band with a garnet stone in a claw setting, tried it for size. ‘There! that’s the one! May I keep it on?’

‘Of course, you may.’ Henry agreed, although he wished she’d allowed him to slip it on her finger.

Back home, he said: ‘We should tell the rest of the family now that we are engaged, don’t you think?’

‘I agree. But leave the other news, please, a little longer,’ she said. ‘Well, I’d better unwrap the fish and chips – that was a good idea of yours, as it’s a bit late to start cooking now. It seems strange without Mum here, but.…’ Carmen had moved into Ramon’s spare room the previous day.

‘We are better on our own,’ he finished for her.

‘At least we know where she is and what she’s up to. The
situation
in Spain is grave now.’

Henry smiled. He wasn’t so sure about that, but wouldn’t say anything.

In the kitchen, May put their supper plates into the oven to make sure the food would be hot. She closed the oven door, remarking, ‘It won’t take long.’ As she straightened up, he came up behind her and gently fingered her hair aside, before he kissed the nape of her neck. ‘I love you so much, May,’ he murmured.

‘That was nice.’ May was unsure how to react.

‘I’ll shift your things later back into your old room,’ he offered.

‘Thank you, Henry, that’s good of you. Will you lay the table now please, and don’t forget the vinegar and the tomato sauce.’

May felt the need of an early night. When she went upstairs she found that Henry had not only transferred her belongings to the big bedroom, but that he had changed the bed linen and turned back the corner of the sheet for her to climb straight in. He had obviously retreated to his own room while she was in the bathroom. She undressed quickly and sank thankfully into bed, glad of the clean, cotton sheets.

A tap of the door. Henry opened it and called ‘Goodnight.’ He, too, was ready for bed, in his pyjamas, decently covered with his old dressing-gown.

‘Come in, Henry,’ she invited. ‘I want to tell you how pleased I am with my lovely ring. Look, I still have it on! I won’t let you down and change my mind on Saturday. How could I, after what you said when you kissed me tonight?’

‘I meant it.’ He came over to the bed. ‘Can we talk?’

She yawned. ‘I thought we had. I promised you—’

‘I won’t hold you to it. The ring … well, we’re not really engaged; we’re both pretending to ourselves that it makes a difference. It’s time to be open with each other, for you to tell Pomona and Bea, for me to inform my family of your predicament, because they think of you as one of us, and will support you, as I still intend to do. You must talk to Paddy, and you can’t do that with me around, so I won’t be coming with you to the museum. His family, when they know, will, I’m sure, be there for you too, whatever the outcome between you and their son.’

‘They were so kind to Pom and me, all those years ago – they sort of adopted us into their family, just as yours did, later.’

‘You and the O’Flahertys have a common background. At heart you’ll always be the Punch and Judy lady, May. It’s a part of you in which I can never share. Before all this happened, I was considering following in my father’s footsteps, as you once did with Jim. I wish I had met him. Can you see yourself as a clergy wife?’

‘I don’t know,’ she admitted.

‘May, be honest with yourself. When you met Paddy again, you knew, didn’t you, that you still had strong feelings for him? What
happened then was inevitable. May I look at the ring? You didn’t really give me a chance to do so, earlier.’

She stretched her hands out to him. Carefully, he slid the ring off her finger. ‘It’s very pretty, but it’s a friendship ring, not an
engagement
ring. Wear it on your other hand … and think of me.’

‘That’s a promise I can keep,’ she said softly.