1618686836 (F) (22 page)

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Authors: Dawn Peers

Tags: #teenage love stories, #epic fantasy trilogy, #young adult fantasy romance, #fantasy romance, #strong female lead, #empath, #young adult contemporary fantasy, #young adult romance, #ya fantasy

BOOK: 1618686836 (F)
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For a moment Eden felt isolated, left out of their friendship and their fun. It was in that moment he remembered that he was seeking a murderer, and these two had already been the subject of one murder attempt.

As soon as Eden's attentions had focused on Quinn, Maertn, too, had appeared to stay close to his friend, like a hawk. More now than ever, though, Eden was sure that their relationship was nothing more than friendship. He had started to hope that he saw Quinn looking at him with curiosity, and perhaps even some kind of growing affection. She was familiar with Maertn, but their relationship had run its full course; they were never going to be anything more to each other.

 

"I have to speak to you both. This isn't easy for me. I..." Quinn looked around, suddenly nervous of her surroundings. Her nightmare about Sirah had set her on edge. She felt uncomfortable parting with this information in rooms assigned to them by Sammah. Anyone could be in the hallways listening. They didn't know where Sammah was, either. Likely that he was bending the ear, and the morals, of either the king or Shiver. Quinn didn't want to take any risks.

"Come with me."

Quinn left the room without another word, expecting that both men would follow her. They did. She almost ran through the castle, ignoring the looks thrown at her by the workers she darted past. Even Yvette was given short shrift, Quinn almost barging in to the woman as she opened her mouth to make an unguessable snide comment. Eden and Maertn were never far behind her, but all three were forced to come to a stunned halt when they met the impassive figure of Ross standing cross-armed in the hallway.

"Now here, where would you three be going in such a hurry? You're not exactly going in the direction of the feast."

Quinn looked alarmed; she couldn't have seemed more guilty than if she had dropped to her knees to begin a confession. Maertn stepped in and saved the day this time. "We have to get to my workshop. We were talking, and I remembered I'd left a pot on the boil, if we don't get to it…."

"Why all three of you?"

"It's a big pot? Please, sir? We need to hurry!"

“And the captain of the guard is needed why?”

“Because he’s meant to be protecting Quinn, sir?”

Ross chewed at his cheek for a second, and Quinn thought for a horrible moment that he wasn't going to buy their little story. Then, with a shrug of his shoulders, he moved to one side and let them past. Eden thanked every spirit watching them, though he felt Ross's gaze on his back until they were out of sight. This wouldn't be the last they would see of the suspicious chamberlain. Out in the empty expanse of the courtyard Quinn turned on her heel to face them both. They almost ran straight in to her.

"Woah, Quinn, a bit of warning next time!"

"Sorry, I...I was just going to talk to you out here, but now I suppose we have to go out to your workshop."

"Why?" Maertn looked confused.

"Because Ross will be looking for us there, and he’ll find out if we don’t go there. Come on. Let's go."

The friends trotted off to Maertn's apothecary, trying to keep up the pace they had shown in the hallways so they didn't arouse any suspicion. No one knew where Ross might be looking from; the healers' rooms were overlooked by many parts of the castle. This made them less than ideal for a secret meeting, but isolated enough across the other side of the courtyard and away from any outbuildings, that they should not be overheard.

Maertn lead the way as soon as they got in, making sure to make a show of putting out the fire that burned in the hearth. Smoke billowed up and out of the chimney; this would be enough to satisfy the casual eyes of any onlookers the chamberlain had set onto them. Looking in each room to make sure they were alone, Maertn pulled cloths over each of the windows and turned to Quinn.

"Right, what’s so important to hear that we have to be out sitting in the cold?"

"We'd better sit down."

Maertn rolled his eyes, but obediently collected together some chairs. Quinn noticed that he didn't expect Eden to help when she made any of these little requests. A natural reaction from birth, of their role to serve, and Eden's role to rule.

"Okay, we're sitting down," Maertn waved everyone to follow his lead as he perched on one of the room's uncomfortable and rickety wooden chairs. They were cheaply put-together and functional. Healers didn't care about their own quarters; they cared about their tools and the patients that came to see them. "What is this amazing news?"

Quinn opened her mouth, but no words came out. Now she was presented with actually telling someone the truth about herself, someone that didn't know already who she was, she didn't know where to begin explaining it. She tried and started in her head different sentences.
You might have always thought I'm different, but…
Listen, I know this is going to sound weird, but...
Eden, please don't kill me straight away, however…
. Nothing she could think of sounded any better than ridiculous. She rubbed her palms together. They were hot and clammy. Quinn took a deep breath, and reached out to both of the men sitting in front of her. Both wore creased frowns on their foreheads. Their eyes showed worry and concern. Their hearts matched their eyes. Quinn’s hopes were lifted by this; both of these men cared for her, and they had her best interests at heart. If she couldn't tell these two who she really was, she would never be able to tell anyone. Then, she would have to accept living under Sammah's sinister shadow for the rest of her life. She couldn't keep living a lie.

"I'm the Satori."

Short. Simple. Shocking, apparently. Her friends' jaws dropped. Quinn blushed. Her heart, though she hadn't thought it possible, started beating faster. She started to fidget, the adrenalin coursing through her, waiting for them to respond. Since they were apparently unable to speak, she went to reach out for them in another way; the way that was so familiar to her now, as easy and effortless as breathing or seeing. Then, she retreated. Instinctively, she realised that now they knew who and what she was, she shouldn't search out their feelings without their permission. Quinn immediately felt ashamed that she had ever done so, especially with Maertn, who had been a forgiving and unyielding friend for so many years.

Maertn's mouth started working up and down; he was apparently nearing being able to vocalise some words.

"I...Quinn...did you? Are you?"

"Spirits no, please, no, I haven't killed anyone. I couldn't kill anyone."

Quinn rushed the words. Eden just nodded in response. He, too, was working towards finally responding. "This makes sense. This makes so much sense. Everything about you. But Quinn...why didn't you tell anyone? Ever?” He looked over to the healer, to reassure himself that Maertn indeed was just finding this out. Maertn looked as stunned as Eden felt. “Not even Maertn? Who else knows this?"

Quinn blushed deeply, her shame growing. She should have told Maertn long before this. Why hadn't she trusted him? She had been ashamed of herself, she knew. She hadn't wanted anyone to know what she was, because she had been taught by Sammah that to be as different as she was, was wrong. She didn't have a gift or a blessing; to be an empath was to have a curse.

"Only Sammah knows."

"Then why is he telling everyone that the Satori...wait...are you saying Baron Sammah is behind the killings?" Maertn almost yelled this, with both Eden and Quinn hushing and waving him down. Maertn looked absolutely furious.

"He has to be, doesn't he? Doesn't it just make sense to you?" Eden was calm, quiet even, but his words were tense with loathing. "He keeps Quinn quiet to do his bidding, then when...what? When you grow up, he needs to get rid of you?"

Quinn shook her head. "I don't think so. I think it's because I tried to leave. I...wait...neither of you care? That I'm an empath? That I can read you? That my father..."

Eden waved her down. "That isn't the important thing now. Am I hurt? Yes. I'm more than upset, Quinn. But what's more pressing now, is that, not only am I meant to be dragging you down to the cells, we know that you are not guilty of what they’re accusing you of. Who is guilty? The Sha'sek ambassador. Do you know what that's going to look like when we tell the king?"

Eden was running his hands furiously through his blond hair, which was dusty and dirty, unkempt with the sleepless days he had spent on the search to impress his unimpressible father. Quinn reached out to Eden, and felt her heart clench when he waved her away. He pinched the bridge of his nose. She suspected she had just given him a migraine.

"Would you have rather heard this from someone else?"

Eden laughed maniacally. "Spirits, no! Who else would tell me? Sammah? And he wouldn't just tell me, either. He'd hand you over with the ropes already in his hand and you'd be dangling off the side of the castle walls by sundown."

Quinn felt physically sick at the thought. Maertn saw her pale and left his chair to kneel in front of her. He placed his hands on her knees, squeezing just enough to let her know he was there, and he cared. "Don't listen to him Quinn. We'll get you out of this. You don't have to be scared at who you are. That doesn't change anything. Not to me."

Quinn looked down to meet Maertn's honest gaze and immediately burst in to tears. Maertn yelled at Eden, distraught at what he saw.

"Look at what you've done now! Spirits be damned, Eden, why did you have to talk like that?"

"I'm sorry Maertn, but it's true!" Eden stood and kicked out at his chair. A leg fell off, and the useless collection of wood collapsed to the floor. "Why mince our words now? The entire kingdom is out to kill the Satori because they believe he—no, she—is a killer. We know Quinn isn't a killer. Who else is going to believe us? No one knows Quinn. She's lived here all her life and you're the only friend she has. We have to keep her safe whilst we make a plan to convince the king and the entire court that not only is the deadly Satori one of their maids, but one of their most trusted advisors is their actual murderer. And, whilst they're at it, executing him will lead to a new war. How's that?"

Maertn faced up to Eden. Quinn bawled at them to stop. Her voice was so hoarse, so broken, that they turned to her immediately.

"I'm not crying because of what Eden said. I want to, but I can't. Because it's true. I'm crying because I've been a terrible friend to you, Maertn. I couldn't keep on lying to you. I can't be what you want me to be. I know that you love me, Maertn. I know it in the same way that I know Eden loves me. But I don't love you. I can never love you in the same way that I love him. So stop it, both of you. My choice is made."

Maertn's shoulders collapsed and, to the astonishment of both Eden and Quinn, a huge grin crept across Maertn's face. He knelt back in front of her, joy dancing around his eyes. "Oh dear Quinn, is that what you thought? Is that why you've been avoiding me? Oh no, I don't...I mean I do...I do love you Quinn, with all my heart. Here. Look again. I give you permission. Tell me what you see."

Quinn met Maertn's eyes again. They were glittering with tears. She sniffed, hesitating at first, but emboldened when he lifted her hand and placed it on his heart. Quinn sent out a thin thread of curiosity, focusing on Maertn's heart for the first time. What she found there brought the tears back again, unbidden, but so joyful. She felt so warm; her body sang with the heat and joy that she found there. It was a calm warmth, like laying on a stone that had taken in the day's heat. She felt everything Maertn felt for her, and nodded. Then he pointed at Eden.

"Now do the same with him."

Eden took an involuntary step back. Quinn, at that moment, didn't want to do the same for Eden. He was so new to her, and his love for her would feel so incomplete compared to the totality of what Maertn had given to her. Then Eden spoke. "Do it, Quinn. I want you to know. I need you to know."

"Now that you know what I am?"

"Especially now that I know who you are. Not what, Quinn. You are still human."

Quinn nodded, pleased by his words but not quite believing them. She rose from her chair and Maertn moved to one side, the wide grin now a smile that was pushing up both sides of his cheeks. Her hand faltered as she moved it to Eden's chest, the palm hovering just above the cloth of his tunic. She could feel the heat rising from his body. Eden refused to move the hand for her. Quinn didn't even know if touching his heart would make a difference to what she felt for Eden; whether it would intensify the emotion of a first love. For Sammah, she had never touched her subjects. It didn't make the experience any less petrifying. Quinn felt that her hands should now be literally dripping with sweat, they had been so clammy before. In a mad second, she wondered how Eden would react to a clammy handprint on his fine tunic. Then she shook the irrational feeling away, and placed her hand over where his heart lay. She could feel it beating underneath her palm. His shirt was cool, smooth, and his chest hard. Quinn was already slightly breathless before she reached out to him. What she felt there almost buckled her knees.

Where Maertn's love had been warm and encompassing, Eden's hit her like a blast of heat from a blacksmith's furnace. She felt so rocked that she almost stepped back. Every muscle in her body started singing in response to what Eden was feeling for her; behind it all there was still a warmth, however Eden's love also contained passion. Quinn realised then, that she had never, ever felt Maertn actually desiring her, whereas this was Eden's overwhelming emotion. Beneath that, there was also a small hole; like a tug in a weave, there was also a doubt. If she tugged at this, Quinn realised, everything Eden felt would likely eventually unravel, the threads of his passion falling to the floor, unused and useless. This imperfection had never been there before. Quinn knew that this was Eden's reaction finding out she was an empath. It was only a small element of his reaction, but the doubt was there, nevertheless. Maertn's emotions were still smooth, flawless, and now Quinn knew, without ardour.

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