2085 (4 page)

“
What would you think if I told you right now that all this time they have been lying to you, and that the reaction actually is a significant percentage of the total population of this planet? What if I told you that their settlements are indeed numerous and are closer than you think, and that leaders not only know them perfectly, but also trade with them?”

“
I would not believe it. For many years I have been aware of the statistics and I have collaborated with the integration. I cannot be wrong.”

“
Well, what I’ve just told you is the truth. I checked it today. And for decades they have lied to me, to you, and to everyone else. And we’ve all heard these lies for so long that we have become used to believe them.”

“
Why do you say all this to me? You know that now both of us will have to resort to the device to erase it from our memories. That’s not what I had planned for this evening, but now it’s unavoidable.”

Now t
he look on Lucy’s face was of disenchantment. Her voice had lost the joyful pitch of minutes earlier.

“
As a matter of fact, there is a way to avoid it. Today I made a decision, one that will dramatically change our lives. Not only I will not use the device again, but I will flee from this system that for so many years has undermined my peace of mind, and seek shelter in some settlement of the reaction. I am convinced that I can prepare a successful escape plan now that so much information has become within my reach. But we must act immediately, because time is against us. I guess that our deadline is next Thursday, which is as long as I can delay my next mental backup session. After that day my life won’t be worth a dime if I fall into the hands of the corporation’s executioners.”

Lucy’
s response was immediate. She rose from her chair to replicate with a high pitch:

“
Never! Now that we have finally reached the top, you pretend to throw everything out of the window. Don’t you count with me. As far as it concerns me, this conversation never happened. I’m going to erase it from my memory right now, and if you know what’s good for you, you will do the same right away.”

She rushed towards the bedroom to
use the isomentalizer and nothing could have stopped her. Her footsteps echoed in the stairway as she repeated again with a raised voice: “Never!”

“
Strange,” he thought to himself, though showing no surprise, “the Lucy of twenty years ago would have followed me anywhere and under any circumstances. Now she is trapped in this system just as I was until this morning. However, my decision is final. I will not use the device again and will not remain as part of this huge lie. Lucy will not remember anything in the morning and I will not show the slightest sign of doubt. I have reached the point of no return. It has been more than five hours and the isomentalizer wouldn’t make a complete effect. Traces of my thoughts of this day will stay without remedy. The hardest part in all this will be bearing to lose her, but the harm is done already. She’s gone forever.”

It had been several hours and a number of drinks when he started towards the stairway. He was moving clumsily as he climbed the steps grabbing the railing. He shuffled forward to the bedroom to lie down on the bed without even taking his clothes off. It barely took him two minutes to plunge into a deep sleep.

“You too
used the device last night?” Lucy asked as she poured hot black coffee in the jar held in her man’s trembling hand.

“
Yes,” he lied, thinking how many years had passed since he hid from her the truth about any topic for the last time.

“
I remember arranging a dinner to celebrate your promotion, and then going upstairs to get ready and await your arrival. The next thing that comes to my mind is the alarm clock this morning. Do you know what happened?”

“No. I’
m just like you. I hope that at least it has been fun.”

Lucy drew a slight smile on h
er face before saying:

“
You have always managed to be funny.”

He replied with a knowing grin and added:

“It’s easy to be funny with you.”

The rest of breakfast passed with the usual calm and relaxation. Lucy remembered nothing of what
had happened the night before, and he was wondering if it was worth trying once again to convince her to flee with him. The way she had reacted to his proposal seemed final. Most likely, it would repeat if he made a new attempt. However, he granted himself this full day to decide about the matter. He might have better luck next time.

From nine in the morning until five in the afternoon
he devoted to read and reread a lot of files. That was how his new view of the corporation got reinforced: greedy for power and control, and ready to manipulate all its members from the roots of their thoughts. The variety of methods that made up the repertoire of the Internal Security Central was amazing.

Among the lower levels of the corporate ladder
, the existence of this central was merely a rumor, as many considered it as just one of many myths.

Although he had known since before
about its existence, he had never suspected the diversity and the level of refinement of their procedures. He devoted special attention to the information on this armed force; after all, it would become the executioner of the autocratic leader’s justice once he had defected. The endless records documented the fates of thousands of dissidents who had failed to escape the dreaded corporation’s determination and had vanished from the scene leaving no traces.

The study of t
he real geography of the planet, not the official one, was a priority. He had to define within a very short time what would be his first destination, determine the best route to reach it, and find a way to ensure the supplies to make it there.

Tak
ing advantage of the weekend to escape could win him some time, although that would mean to show at his office on Thursday. He needed to avoid the mental backup session scheduled for that day. Rescheduling it for the end of the day would be easy, but finding the right excuse not to show for it would be a major problem. Mental backups were one of the few obligations considered as sacred within the corporation. The ability to control everybody was based upon the information retrieved through them.

The plan should include Lucy. He was determined to convince her to go with him, but
it should not depend on her participation, as it might happen that he failed to make her join him.

Amid
this absorbing activity, the clock struck five in the afternoon. Corporate policies enforced leaving office at the end of each working day. Although he was allowed to stay in the building as long as he wanted to, this could attract the arrival of unwelcome visitors. He decided to leave like everyone else, overcoming his desire to continue his research.

While traveling
home he focused on formulating an initial plan based on the knowledge acquired that day, so he could have a broader picture when convincing Lucy.

After dinner
, when loafing in the living room to have a drink and a chat, he would try again to gain her consent. This time he was hoping to get a less visceral response from his woman, and so he started:

“
Remember that this morning you asked me if I had any memory of what happened last night?”

“I remember it well.”

“Well, I must confess that I lied to you. I know exactly what happened, and I have chosen to keep this memory.”

The
bewildered expression of his wife caused him to pause. He had to fix his gaze on hers to continue:

“
After the great dinner you gave me, I confessed to you that yesterday I made a terrible mistake. This mistake was to peep into some confidential files of the corporation, where I found documented many actions that my personal morality cannot approve. As a result of my intrusion, I am suffering a serious crisis of conscience. I have chosen not to be more part of the game. From this moment I have become a dissident. The time I have left before my desertion becomes noticed, a desertion which I have committed already, is just until Thursday afternoon, when I must assist to my periodic mental backup session. The methods that the Internal Security Central usually applies in these cases, added to the personal style of the leader, make me think that my days as an executive are about to end. After next Thursday, the only chance that you and I will have to stay together will be fleeing to the territory controlled by the reaction, for which I have prepared a plan.

“
Stop it! Say no more!” she angrily interrupted him. “Can’t you see that you are shattering my happiness? You did not consider me to make such a decision! After all this time, and when I have finally managed to achieve the lifestyle that I have longed for so many years, you tell me I have to give up everything. How much must I love you to give up my dreams only to follow you? I never thought you could be so selfish. If you have made a big mistake, you must find a solution by yourself. I am not hearing another word. I will respect the confidentiality of what you just told me, but I will not participate in your madness. I’ll erase my memory again, and please, tomorrow morning, when I ask if you remember what happened tonight, show me you still love me by lying again.”

Lucy did not
wait for an answer. She stood up and walked to the bedroom, determined to eradicate from her memory all traces of this conversation, just like last night.

“
At least this time I got a less violent response,” he thought, I still have one night to achieve it. I’ll try once more. I won’t lose her without giving a good a fight.”

On Wednesday, as the day before, he spent his whole day in the office studying the contents of as many records as he could, taking notes of every relevant fact as he found it. He opted to use a paper notebook, as he had learned from one of all those files that all electronic storage media were susceptible of being spied, and as a matter of fact, they were periodically inspected.

The better
he was getting to known the corporation’s methods, the greater was his conviction that the struggle in which he had engaged by choice would be an unequal one. The records showed that every dissident that had been chased by the corporation’s agents had finally been caught. However, he trusted that this statistic, like many others, would turn out to be incorrect.

When the car
was taking him home, his thoughts were focused on Lucy. He had to find a way to convince her. Speaking the truth had not worked in the past, so he was wondering if it would be right lying to her. He could make up a version of the story to make her feel as threatened as him. The odds of such a tactic to work were bigger; however, his ethics did not let him feel good about doing it. After all, he would be tricking her into a thorough transformation of her way of life.

At the end
he decided to try again to convince her turning to the truth. During dinner and after it he looked for the words and the right time to address the issue, but he did not feel like doing it. In the end, this time he waited until both were in bed to get started:

“
You know well that I have always loved you, that you hold the most important place in my life and that I could never do anything to hurt you,” he started.

“What’
s with what you are telling me? Has something happened? You scare me.”

“Along the years
you have seen that everything regarding your interests is above mine, and I repeat, now as ever, I could not live without you. You know, as I have said a thousand times, that I hope to spend the rest of time in your company because it is the only way that I can conceive happiness.”

“You make me
nervous. Is there a problem? You know I will not abandon you. Tell me at once what’s wrong with you.”

“The glitter in your
expression and the gorgeous mood that goes with it since a few days ago tell me that the events of last weekend have brought you a renewed joy. I can feel happiness in your life.”

“
It’s true, I feel like I hadn’t since long time ago.”

“Well
, what has made you so happy, has been a strong emotional meltdown to me. Right now I don’t feel capable of staying in the same path. I need to change course. I am carrying inside a strong whirlwind that is destroying me. If I continue in the same direction, I won’t have enough strength to endure.”

“
I don’t understand. It hasn’t been a week since you reached an enviable position. Those who are at your level are no more than a handful. I thought you’d be as pleased as I am.”

“
And indeed I was, until Monday around noon, when it was revealed to me a number of facts that until then I hadn’t noticed in spite of holding a senior position within the corporation.”

“
What are you talking about?”

“I have come into i
rrefutable evidence that the corporation, and all others like it, have been manipulating us for years, deceiving us, and controlling us in every aspect of our lives from the very foundations of our thinking. It must suffice as a proof that I tell you that the reaction consists of a large number of settlements all across the globe. That corporations trade with them and support their existence because they need them. That the members of the reaction who seek to transgress the boundaries of our ordered world inevitably pay with their lives. That the same thing happens to any inhabitant of our bloc showing the slightest disagreement with the rules of corporations. That we lack of the fundamental right to think freely under penalty of losing our privileges, and that is why we have given up our quest to understand the truth in exchange for a secure life. That we have become used to suppress even the slightest idea that contradicts the standards set by the leaders and erase any record that this has arisen, and we do it systematically, as if indeed it were right that anyone but ourselves would govern over our minds. In short, that we have been enslaved in body and mind by choice, and yet so, we aim to turn into this regrettable condition of helplessness the few people who haven’t given up their freedom to be themselves. I have decided to flee and seek refuge in a world where I am granted the right to think freely and to dissent.”

When
his speech reached this point, Lucy’s expression was of astonishment. There was a long silence that she finally broke.

“Are you saying me that
we live an illusion? I can hardly believe it. We have a wonderful life. We do as we wish. We are respected and we do the same for others. We live in a beautiful community that accepts us and continually rewards us. We do not suffer any fear and in exchange the only price we are expected to pay is to show absolute loyalty, and yet, if at any time we become betrayed by our own thoughts, we have been provided the means to dispel any trace of having erred. I am happy as I am and all that you have told me has no meaning for me. I will not change my beautiful life for any other; I won’t even consider doing it. I think this is just a sign that so much pressure on your new responsibility has overcome you. I suggest you now we both vanish from our minds what we have just talked, and if tomorrow morning you find out that you have kept some trace of it, you know that you can get help in the clinics of the corporation. As for me, I’ve heard enough, so right now I’m ending this discussion. I love you and I’ll always be by your side. I’ll bear whatever it takes, but I’m not willing to change after so many years, not just to chase a fantasy that doesn’t promise anything good. Come on! Let’s get out of this right now! Please, do not make any nonsense.”

As soon as she f
inished her speech, she approached him to kiss his lips. Then she reached out for the isomentalizer’s tiara and added:

“
Use it as soon as I’m finished. Please do it for me. And also do it for you. Don’t you threaten all the wonderful things have achieved after so many years of efforts just because you are suffering a slight crisis that perhaps isn’t even a crisis of conscience.”

He
stayed sitting motionless and pensive for a long time. So many years of practice, of mental discipline, and of loyalty, could not be countered with a simple short speech, and as each day Lucy’s memories of what she had heard would disappear, her mind would be in the same state as before the first attempt. There was no way to reach the core of her understanding. Now his fear had become reality. He will have to leave behind the woman who had shared a lifetime with him.