39 Weeks (53 page)

Maybe it was the gas and air, or maybe I just needed another woman to talk to, I don’t know,
or maybe
it was
that whole female bonding thing given the situation,
but I burbled on as if we’d been friends for ages.
‘Well I thought James was just a friend but he seems to think otherwise, I thought he was over it, he said he was, but j
udging by tonight he obviously wa
sn’t. Him and Rob almost ended up hitting each other earlier when all this started.’

‘I see.
And the other man is your Dad is he?
’

‘Yes. That was my Dad.’

‘Well it’s nice that you have so many people who care about you, some of our mothers come in on their own.’

Another contraction was beginning. As it intensified I grabbed the gas and air mask and held it over my face breathing deeply. God that stuff was good. Rob stuck his head round the door as the pain began to fade, and froze while he waited for it to pass completely.

‘How are you holding up?’ he asked still with just his head round the door.

‘Okay. This gas and air stuff is helping a lot.’

‘Can I come in for a minute?’

I looked at Kate to check that was alright and not breaking any of the
maternity units commandments,
to which she nodded and said ‘s
ure’, so Rob came in and sat in the visitors chair next to the bed.

‘Did they tell you how long you might be . . ?’

‘No they don’t know, nobody knows, it takes . . well as long as it takes I suppose.’

‘We seem to have spent a lot of time in hospitals one way and another don’t we, and here we are again.’

‘Well I suppose this time
it
was inevitable, I mean if you’re having a baby you’re bound to end up here sooner or later.’

‘Yeah I suppose.’ Rob laughed but not very convincingly.

We silently watched the monitors blipping away. It was kind of hypnotic in a way and strange to think they were recording Ella’s movements that I couldn’t feel, well not right at this moment anyway. 

‘Is James alright?’

‘I guess. Why is he here exactly? Did you ask him to be here
,
you know when it happened?’

‘Rob for the hundredth time James is just a friend, and no I didn’t ask him to be here when the baby was born.’

‘Well he seems to think you did.’

‘Well I didn’t. I can’t help what James thinks.’

‘I knew he was lying. Arrogant interfering arse.’

‘Rob please . .’

But I couldn’t finish, another contraction started and this time Rob handed me the face mask and held my other hand until the pain receded.

‘Whoa that was a long one, they seem to be getting a bit longer each time.’
I said through my teeth that were still clenched
tight
.

‘
Isn’t that
wh
at’s supposed to happen
?’

‘Yes
it is.
Listen a
bout James, do you think you and him could manage to . . get along for the time being at least until after the baby is born. You know call a truce or something?’

‘I guess so. It’s just that . . well if I could just be sure how you really felt and whether you . . I mean if you have feelings for him or . .’

‘Oh my God. I love you, you idiot. I don’t want to get married at least not for a few years anyway, maybe one day but not now and certainly not just because of Ella, and James is
just
a friend, has only ever been a friend.’

‘Do you really mean that?’

‘Do you know what, in labour or not I might get up
off this bed
and clobber you in a minute.’

‘No don’t do that
.
.
I’ve been
an idiot
haven’t I?
’

‘Yes you have.’
I said with feeling.

We smiled at each other’s aw
kwardness, not knowing quite where that left us. I mean was everything back on again, or was it still all up in the air?

‘
My d
ad’s taking a long time, is he alright?’
I said realising he’d been gone for a lot longer than
the
five minutes
he said he’d be
.

‘Yeah he’s phoning everyone.’

‘Um what do you mean everyone?’

‘Well everyone.’

‘His friends, Stella, people like that
you mean
?’

‘Yes and some of the other people in your phone.’

‘He’s going through my phone?’ I said almost hysterical.

‘Isn’t that what you wanted him to do?’

‘No.’ I shouted.

‘But . . he said he . .’

‘I was going to phone everyone after Ella was born. After
,
not now. The only person he was supposed to be phoning was Mum.’

‘But he still couldn’t get hold of her, so he thought . .’

‘
Y
ou don’t suppose they’ll
all come to the hospital do you?’

‘Um . .’

‘Oh my God, well go and find him. Tell him . . ‘

But I didn’t get to finish what Rob should tell my dad, another contraction had started and that put an end to anything I was trying to say.
But I guess Rob got the gist
as he gave my hand a squeeze and left.

Two minutes later Dad crept back into the room looking sheepish and waited until
I’d finished with the face mask
before saying sorry
,
and that he thought he
’d been
doing the right thing
phoning everyone
.

‘So now they’re all
coming?’ I said in despair. ‘How many people did you talk to?’

‘I don’t think everyone’s comi
ng. Some people where tied up and
couldn’t just drop everything at such short notice, but . .’

‘Oh great, just what I need an audience.’

‘They won’t be
in
here watching, they’ll be in the waiting room.’

‘Still though. I feel like a performing seal or something.’

‘I’m sorry Love
. Do you want me to phone them all back?’

‘No you can’t do that.’

The first Nurse came back, sorry make that midwife, to check on my progress. I was five centimetres. Which was good . . but not good enough
. S
till a while to go yet.

2
8
th
February – Week 39 + 2
Day
s

I knew those books had lied.
Nearly five
hours later
, two o’clock in the morning
and
I was
still
puffing and clenching
my way through the contractions
that we
re coming every two minutes now, and to describe them as ‘painful’ would be like saying the Sahara was a bit warm, you know true but didn’t even begin to explain just how hot it really was.   

Rob had sat with me for a while, and Dad had sat with me for a while, even James had put in an appearance but Rob really wasn’t happy about it, and to tell the truth I don’t think James was all that comfortable
either
, by the time the second contraction started during his visit he’d turned decidedly ashen and made an excuse to leave, which Rob of course found highly amusing and wouldn’t shut up about.

I got reports from the three of them that my ‘audience’ had turned up. First Shelley and Nick, then Tricia
and Short Fran
, then Doreen from work, then Marsha back from visiting Mac’s parents, Mac
had
stayed home to look after Flora and Harry. Heaven knows what the waiting room was like, it must have been li
ke a Judy supporters convention in there. But I didn’t
really think about it too much being as
I was rather preoccupied with my own issues.

Finally my mum
had
turned up, seemingly she’d turned her phone off by accident, and by the time she realised
it
she’
d received
about twenty messages. Course she came straight in to see me and was all apologies, but by that time Dad had appointed himself chief ‘Labour Partner’
,
and
a great job
he was doing at it
too
, and
he
wasn’t about to relinquish the position
to anyone
,
even Mum
. Funny how things turn out, I mean having a baby you automatically assume you’ll need your mum, but turns out you could just as easily need your dad.

Most
of my impromptu audience came and went after about an hour, well Rob and James stayed, and my Mum, but everyone else drifted off once they knew I was alright and was in for the long haul.
 

The gas and air was still doing its job, but I barely managed to put the face mask down in between contractions before I had to hold it over my face again when the next one started. If it hadn’t been for that, the Sahara desert I was talking about would have been hotter than
hell. All I could think was how, or why, would anyone willingly put herself through this more than once and go on to have more children. I mean once you knew what you were in for why
on earth
would you do it again?
 

My nice nurse Kate went for a tea break, funny to think of taking a tea break while all this was going on but you forget that for the nurses it’s just a job, and I currently had the first nurse, make that midwife, in with me.
Her name was Margaret she
’d
grudgingly told me, but Kathy Bates would have been more appropriate. Talk about missed your calling, what she should have been doing was directing operations at a concentration camp, but maybe jobs like that were in short supply and she’d had to settle for the next best thing, namely torturing maternity unit inmates.

Doctor Red Coat came back, still all sunshine and light, and after another ch
eck decided it was nearly time, Ella was crowning. That meant, so it was explained to me by
Margaret
a.k.a.
Kathy
, that they could see the crown of Ella’s head.

This was it then and stupidly I thought
to myself
there really is a baby in there. I know mad or what, of course there was a baby but now the doctor a
nd the nurse could see her head, actually see it,
it wasn’t just
words and weird feelings in my
stomach, this was a real person being born.

Kate came back from her tea break
just in the nick of time
and took over
the
key position at the business end with Doctor Red Coat, leaving Kathy Bates to get back to her be
loved form filling. Dad was at my side
holding my hand
while I had wave after wave of contractions
that all ran into one another
. The Doctor said I’d feel the urge to push and I did
.

I pushed with all my might
and everyone kept telling me how well I was doing, but to be honest I was only doing what my body felt it had to do, I
,
as in my last surviving brain cell, had
very little to do with it and
couldn’t have stopped or controlled it in any way
even
if I’d wanted
it
to.
 

After two or three really strong contractions, and pushing for all I was worth, they told me Ella’s head was out, and that I should take a minutes rest before the final push.

One last push and there she was. My daughter had been born. I couldn’t see much of what was happening given that I was laying down, but Kate held her up as much as she could and I struggled to half sit up. The pains had stopped, just like that. One minute it was extreme torture and the next nothing.

Doctor Happy asked Dad if he’d like to cut the cord and Dad beamed as if he’d just won an award or something, and looked to me for confirmation which I gave him straight away. I guess some blokes would have already passed out by now or balked at the idea of cutting the cord, but not my dad, he was magic.

Kate helped him and together they cut Ella’s cord, or should that be my cord? Anyway whichever it was, Ella was now free and Kate clamped her tiny bel
ly button and laid her across my
chest so I could finally hold her and gaze at her perfect little face.

‘She’s beautiful Judy. She looks just like you
did
when you were born.’ Dad said.