44: Book Three (11 page)

“Thanks, Jesse,” I said. “It might work.”

Now I had a new plan in the works. It filled me with hope again.

Maybe I would be back home soon.

CHAPTER 24

I had to go to the bathroom. When I got back, Jesse was gone.

I was a little sad to be all alone again, but it had been a good morning. Great, actually. It had been a long time since we had been able to hang out like that and it had helped me get my mind off things.

Plus, I was really excited about Claire.

I wasn’t ready to go back upstairs, so I wandered over to the game room. And as long as I was being left alone, it was a pretty nice place to stay. It was nice too not looking out the window and seeing the island in the distance that now taunted me and reminded me of my failure.

I played FIFA Soccer 11 on Wii for about an hour and then watched the original production of
The Woman in Black.
It was one of my favorites. I was really surprised they had it since it was so obscure.

I grabbed some snacks out of the cabinet and sat down in one of the large leather recliners.

“You ghosts really are pretty frightening,” I said out loud, just in case Jesse could hear. I knew he would like this movie. We never had a chance to watch it together when he was alive.

I jumped after the scene in the graveyard and then laughed at myself. The hairs on the back of my neck were still standing.

As I finished watching the movie, I thought about ghosts. There was so much about it all that I didn’t understand and it was strange that Jesse didn’t seem to know that much either. I was confused about why he was able to walk in both worlds. And I wasn’t even sure if he was a ghost. There seemed to be such a difference between Jesse and Annabelle.

After the movie, I searched through the discs and found a recent taping of a Barcelona-Real Madrid game. I put it in and sat down.

I was struck by the difference in the line ups. Even though the game was being played in Madrid and even though the home team was the richest in the world, they still came out with a very defensive formation. It was like they were playing not to lose.

Barcelona, on the other hand, had an attacking lineup that bordered on suicide. I counted the small, skilled players. Messi, Fàbregas, Sánchez, Iniesta, and Xavi, plus crazy Dani Alves on one wing. It was insane. And fearless. Here they were in the heart of darkness, going up against the world’s highest-paid thugs and hatchet men, and they feared no evil.

And what made it even sweeter was that they won, 3-1.

“Wow,” I said as the game ended. And then something caught my eye.

He was walking across the court, heading in my direction. My breathing got fast as I heard the footsteps and squeaking on the wood.

My stomach tightened. I threw down the control and sat perfectly still, hoping he would go away.

He opened the glass door and walked in casually, sitting down a few chairs away. I refused to look at him and we sat in silence for a few minutes.

“This wasn’t such a good game,” Jack said finally.

I stared at the TV.

“I’m hoping down the line that you can somehow forgive me, Abby. I want us to be friends again. It would mean a lot to me.”

I turned my head and glared at him. He was dressed in his usual soccer attire, sporting a ridiculous black Real Madrid away jersey, like he had just walked off from the field in the hot summer sun. He smiled briefly but I looked away.

“Oh, right, that’ll happen,” I said. “I always forgive sleazebags who are trying to kill me.”

I watched the highlights, hoping he would just leave.

“I just came down to say I was sorry it had to be like that. I didn’t like it, tricking you. And to tell you that I still consider you a friend.”

He got up and lingered, watching the TV.

“With friends like you, who needs friends?” I said.

“Okay. I’m not expecting anything from you. You don’t have to. But I wanted to say hi. See you around.”

He finally walked away.

I wished I hadn’t eaten so many chips. I drank a little soda to try and settle my stomach, but it didn’t help.

CHAPTER 25

As I stumbled up the stairs and down the hall to the living room, I stopped. I stepped back, out of view.

It was Nathaniel, walking through the large living room, carrying the vase of withering roses that had been on my nightstand. He hadn’t seen me and disappeared down the hallway that led to the kitchen.

I stayed in the corridor and waited until it was quiet. Then I ran upstairs and closed the door.

Sure enough, fresh roses were on the dresser. Even the bed had been made.

I shuddered.

CHAPTER 26

“You asked me why I do it,” Nathaniel said, tapping his long fingers together. “Why I’m so committed to my research.”

I leaned back in the familiar chair, drinking a Coke. I wasn’t so nervous, not like the first night. The conversations had become routine now.

“I know you don’t yet see the value of my work,” he said. “But I’m confident you will someday. So it’s an important question. A good question.”

“I’ll never see that it’s okay to kill innocent people, Nathaniel. Never.”

He picked up his drink and ran a finger around the rim of the glass. His energy was calm, unaffected.

“I want to share something of my past with you this evening, Abby. I think it will explain who I am and why I am on this path.”

I nodded. I would rather he talk about himself than probe me with more of his questions anyway. The more he talked, the better it was.

“Fine,” I said.

“I was young when I fell in love. Just a bit older than you are now. And I fell hard from the very moment I first saw her. She was a beautiful girl. Elegant. Charming. Full of grace. I couldn’t stop thinking about her, couldn’t eat or sleep. I was completely under her spell. When I was in her presence, I no longer was myself. And for the first time in my life, I felt alive.

“I was fortunate that she felt the same way about me. It was love in its highest form. Real. True. Passionate.

“My father said that I was too young for such a relationship, but I didn’t care. All the threats he made, many of which he kept, couldn’t stop us. We were in love, Abby. And if you have ever been in love like that, you know what I’m talking about. How singular the mind becomes. How nothing else matters.”

I couldn’t help but think of Jesse. I did know what he was talking about.

“Even Benjamin questioned my judgment when I told him of our plans to marry. He didn’t see the need to hurry. But we weren’t going to wait. When you find something like that, you always fear that it will be taken away from you. Even though I was young, I knew that much. You can’t wait.”

A large lump grew in my throat when he said that. That’s what had happened to me. In a flash, in one terrible moment, Jesse had been ripped away from me.

“She was the one person in the entire world who saw me as I was, both the light and the dark. And she loved me anyway. We had a love affair that rivaled many of the great operas. It was as if Puccini had composed the music himself. It was a bond like no other. Rare and beautiful. I would have done anything for her. Lay down my soul for her to walk upon. I was lost in her.”

I took a sip of my drink, finding it hard to swallow, and put it down on the table. I stared at the fire, feeling different than I had just minutes before.

“I realize that perhaps you do not know of the things of which I am speaking. Not yet anyway. And there are few words to describe it. This kind of love I’m speaking about is another world. And if you find yourself in it, you become part of something that is beyond you. And it changes you. Forever.”

He stopped for a moment and looked at me, then down at the ground. It was strange hearing his story. I was feeling more than I wanted to, more than I expected. I was understanding more, too and it had left me confused.

He smiled and looked back over at me.

“I gave everything up to be with her. I didn’t care that my father had disinherited me, had changed his plans for me to join him in the family business. I enrolled in medical school, like my brother, and we lived on very little. It was the happiest time of my life.”

Nathaniel got up quickly, stopping in front of the window. He looked out at the night and was quiet.

“Emma died when I was a resident. With all the powers and procedures and medicines of our modern age at my disposal, I was unable to save her. My world changed in a second, Abby. In that moment the gods cast me out of the light and plunged me into blackest night. An existence filled with utter and unending despair. For years, I was in Hell.”

I stared at him, suddenly seeing him in a new light. I inhaled slowly. The killer sitting opposite me wasn’t just a monster anymore, a cutout caricature. He was someone who had once been touched by love. And destroyed by it.

“But my research has provided me with a way out, back to the world of the living. And you have as well.”

He went over by the fire, resting his arm on the mantle.

“How did Emma die?” I asked.

But he didn’t answer. Or couldn’t. He looked at me for a moment and then turned away, walking out of the room, leaving me alone in the library.

***

Somehow, Nathaniel had made me feel something other than hatred for him. It didn’t change the wrongness of his acts, but it explained what had led him here. What had broken him.

Love and pain.

And I knew something about both of those things.

CHAPTER 27

It was early when I heard the sound of the lock.

“Good morning,” Phil said as he walked in. He stood at the edge of the bed.

“Let’s get going.”

I got up and walked into the bathroom, slamming the door. I knew what he was here for. I could try and make a run for it as we walked downstairs. Or I could stay in the bathroom and refuse to come out. I washed my face, thinking of my options.

“Come on, Abby,” he said, knocking on the door.

I didn’t have a plan. I walked out and stopped. Someone else was now in the room.

“Hello, Abby. I’m Matthew,” he said. “I’ll be your doctor today.”

He was a little older than Phil, and had dark hair and a thin, angular face. A chill shot through my body as I looked at both of them. They were wearing scrubs, with masks dangling under their chins.

“We’ve got to get going,” Phil said, walking behind me and nudging me forward.

I didn’t move.

“Look, Abby, we can do it the easy way or the hard way,” Matthew said. He lifted up his hand and showed me the syringe that he was holding.

“Fine,” I said.

I followed Phil out the door, Matthew close behind. We all walked downstairs, through the kitchen, and out the side door. I looked for Simon, but he wasn’t there.

They led me into the guest house. It was much larger than I thought. The room that we walked into was big and open, with high ceilings and tables set up. There were microscopes and test tubes and various machines and equipment in the corners.

Phil handed me a hospital gown.

“You can change over here behind the curtains,” he said.

I changed slowly. My hands were shaking and my head was dizzy with fear. When I came out, there were a few more people wandering around, including the woman researcher I had seen in my room and in the garden.

She was standing by a machine. She looked over at me for a moment, her eyes large and serious, and smiled.

I tried to smile back. If I survived today, I had to find her and talk to her.

I looked for Simon, but didn’t see him. I wondered what he did for Nathaniel, if he would be helping with the tests today.

I realized where I was now. This wasn’t a guest house for visitors, like I had thought. It was a laboratory. That was why the shades had been pulled down, why I couldn’t see in when I was exploring the grounds. This was where they all worked, and probably where most of them slept, if they even slept. It was why the big house felt empty all the time.

I looked around for Nathaniel, but I didn’t see him.

“Please, sit down, Abby,” Matthew said. I sat in a plastic chair next to a table.

“Like you’ve been told already, there are no sedatives today,” he said. “The tests that we will be conducting are tests that hospitals do all over the country, every day. They are perfectly safe, and are fairly common procedures. You might be in a little discomfort but should be fine afterwards, with no serious complications.”

He patted my back.

“Here, drink this,” he said, opening up a small jar.

“What is it?” I asked.

“It’ll help with your stomach.”

My stomach didn’t need any help from him, but he stood over me. As I drank it, someone handed me a plastic bowl and I immediately threw up into it.

“That wasn’t much help,” I said, wiping my mouth with the back of my hand.

“We need your stomach to be empty,” Matthew said.

“Hello, Abby,” a familiar voice said.

I looked up and saw Nathaniel walking toward me. He was wearing a white coat and had emerged from the long hall in front of me.

“I wanted to tell you that I will be monitoring the tests carefully throughout the day,” he said.

I looked away. I could care less if he was here or not.

“I trust that you’ve met Matthew here. He will start with a lumbar puncture this morning. This will give us an idea about the conditions of your brain and spinal fluids. There will be a few other tests later, also involving your brain. We should be done by the early afternoon and you will be able to rest afterwards.”

Nathaniel waited for a minute, but I didn’t say anything. Didn’t even look at him. He started walking away.

I bolted from the chair and ran over to the door and outside, feeling the soft rain on my face before someone pulled me back. Two pairs of strong hands came up to me and grabbed my arms and legs. They lifted me up, took me over to a gurney, and strapped me down.